Depression. It's a silent killer.

[Wetkitty09]

The holiday season is hard for most of us. Many wish for the family and friends interaction that we see in the media but rarely find in RL. Each year is a kind of mourning of the possibility of love and acceptance from those that are supposed to be there for us.
There is also the cultural obligation to give more than one can afford to show that love to others that cannot or will not be able to accept us or our love.
For the last few years I have made a point of hermiting myself during this season. It isn’t any great hardship. My kids understand how I feel and don’t pressure me to attend. Thankfully.
Have the best day you can.
Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

I've really been struggling, but I have so much to do. I'm so exhausted and sad. But, hey. At least I'm being productive. Made some extra cash today.

Hang in there everybody. It's OK to not be a ball of radiant Christmas joy all the time.

 

[Lovethefox]

I’ve had to put one of my dogs who've
been with us for 16 years down this past Sunday. This little guy has been my medicine helping me cope as a caregiver for my wife.
Always there for me when things are quiet and she is sleeping.
My god I’m going to miss him.

I feel like someone ripped a piece of my heart out

 

[Wetkitty09]

I’ve had to put one of my dogs who've
been with us for 16 years down this past Sunday. This little guy has been my medicine helping me cope as a caregiver for my wife.
Always there for me when things are quiet and she is sleeping.
My god I’m going to miss him.

I feel like someone ripped a piece of my heart out

I know this feeling. Dogs are too good for us. My old dog and my new one keep me from staying in bed most days.
The pain never goes away, we just learn to live with it.
I’m so sorry for your loss.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Morning all
It’s hard when the people you think highly of are actually just selfish humans after all.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[saintcero]

Morning all
It’s hard when the people you think highly of are actually just selfish humans after all.

Be safe out there.
Love you.

Forgive them, for they know not what they do.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Forgive them, for they know not what they do.

I’ll forgive myself for keeping the shade on my eyes but they are capable of making choices themselves.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Morning all and happy solstice. I hope the return of the sun makes the prospects for the new year better.
Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[Parental_advisory]

Been really bad last couple days. Today I'm really wondering why I even fight it.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Been really bad last couple days. Today I'm really wondering why I even fight it.

You’re welcome to post or vent or rant as much as you like here.
Be safe out there.

 

[MiaBabe23]

Hope everyone is finding some comfort and source of enjoyment. Can be a tough time of year if you’re going through something, I know I’m finding that to be the case. Hugs to everyone

 

[Lovethefox]

Been really bad last couple days. Today I'm really wondering why I even fight it.

I understand how that feels. I’ve been caring for my chronically ill wife for two years now with no help. There are days I feel defeated by everything around me and the eventual outcome that is on the horizon scares the hell out of me.
Somehow though, I manage to pull my head out of myself and move on with my day.
Not really sure how. The battle seems endless some days.

I know it’s hard to do, but fight it you must.
Get your ass out of bed every morning and as difficult as it is, try to do something that you enjoy. It helps.

 

[Bassytian]

Been struggling a bit this weekend, maybe it has something to do with the holidays, I don't know. Not really "depressed" in the sense that most people use it for. It's more anger than anything, which I know depression can manifest that way as well.

I'm not angry at anyone in particular, or even myself. I suppose I'm angry that I'm "different", I've never fit in anywhere. Whenever I tried to fit in, I was ignored. So in response, I ignore the world/society twice as hard. I'm so damn tired of being forced to exist in a world/society that I don't belong in, feeling like I'm an outsider or visitor. I've been buying more lottery tickets that I probably should with the hopes of winning enough money that I can afford to never leave my house again.

I don't know if God exists or not but if He does, then He clearly intended for me to be alone. And that's exactly what I want, His will be done. I'm finished with trying to be a part of society. Almost 40 years of trying and nothing to show for it. I am only truly happy when I am engaging in solitary pursuits and I am the most productive alone, so that's how I want to spend however many years I have left, in solitude.

 

[Parental_advisory]

You’re welcome to post or vent or rant as much as you like here.
Be safe out there.

Thanks

 

[Monsterbudca]

I’m silently being killed

 

[Parental_advisory]

Sorry to hear that. If you need to talk let me know

 

[Monsterbudca]

Sorry to hear that. If you need to talk let me know

I might have to take you up on that

 

[smtst5]

Today is the anniversary of my dad’s passing. We didn’t always get alone but he’s still my dad. The struggle bus is strong today.

 

[Corbie]

Today is the anniversary of my dad’s passing. We didn’t always get alone but he’s still my dad. The struggle bus is strong today.

I understand. Wednesday will be he anniversary of my dad's passing. 16 years. Still hard to take.

 

[Corbie]

Really feeling lonely and unconnected tonight. In need of physical contact and I know I'm not going to get any.

 

[Bassytian]

I know the feeling. I have accepted the fact that no one will ever love or want to touch me. I'm too boring and ordinary, and there is nothing I can do that other men can't do better. I can't compete with other men in the dating market.

That being said, I am trying to find a way to make my pain and loneliness useful. I may die alone, but that doesn't mean I can't succeed in other areas of my life. It's a work in progress, but I am adopting a new mantra for 2025.

"Pain Into Strength", I have plenty to work with.

 

[Bassytian]

I understand. Wednesday will be he anniversary of my dad's passing. 16 years. Still hard to take.

I’m sorry to hear that. Mine died 20 years ago last month.

He was not a good man to be honest, emotionally abusive to me and my mother, and may be partly responsible for some of my issues. I was diagnosed with High Functioning Autism as a child and was sickly (I wasn’t expected to live to be a teenager, but here I am at 40). I wasn’t the son he wanted so he had little to do with me. But just like the OG poster, he’s still my dad so I try to honor him in some way, no one else is.

While it was easy for me to move on, I’m sorry that you and the OG are still struggling. They say “time heals”, but they never say how much it takes. I hope you both find peace and love from others.

 

[Zeppelin1969]

I wish mine was silent. All I want is to be able to relax and sleep enough, some food at night, that's it. Peace and quiet. But at my age I realize my fate. You can't make others care.

 

[smtst5]

I understand. Wednesday will be he anniversary of my dad's passing. 16 years. Still hard to take.

It’s been 16 years since my dad passed as well.

 

[filt]

Tough time of year for a myriad of reasons. I have a bit of time on and off if anyone wants to let off a bit of steam.

Zero judgement.