Aquagal
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 27, 2007
- Posts
- 31,672
If only you could put a little visine in there.
Dear X
- Thread starter Lorilei
- Start date
- Status
If only you could put a little visine in there.
B
BradBigBrain
Guest
I just had this thought of visine...but for another reason.
Aquagal
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Apr 27, 2007
- Posts
- 31,672
B
BradBigBrain
Guest
Not to be graphic...but...let's just say that I was totally turned on by your sexy tits. This is something that is not really outside the realm of possibility. Now let's just say that I had the opportunity to have some sexual relations with you. And further that I want to place my expression of happiness on you someplace.
BUT
I was so excited...that I overshot. I aimed low..but landed a bit too high.
You may need some visine.
aexoticgrl
Instigator of Naughty..
- Joined
- Nov 6, 2012
- Posts
- 3,812
Dear Crossfit Instructor:
You are so damn yummy. I just want you to know that your comment about "stripper butt" and pierced nipples was not lost on me. I want you to know that I'm going to lust after you, since you opened the door with your inappropriate comments.
~ Cougar in Training.
You are so damn yummy. I just want you to know that your comment about "stripper butt" and pierced nipples was not lost on me. I want you to know that I'm going to lust after you, since you opened the door with your inappropriate comments.
~ Cougar in Training.
TongueLust
Bruja-Hija De Yemayá
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2012
- Posts
- 130,233
Dear Buddah,
We have been through a lot together, you are the one who knows ALL of my secrets.
You are the only man I trust no questions asked with my girls.
I love how we finish each others sentences and know exactly what to say and not to say.
I love how we don't even have to speak to know how we are feeling, just one glance says it all.
I love how we made sure to never let anyone come in between our friendship.
I love all of the crazy memories and things we have done and been through.
I just wanted to say thank you and that I love you.
May we have 30 more blessed years of friendship.
Signed,
Me
We have been through a lot together, you are the one who knows ALL of my secrets.
You are the only man I trust no questions asked with my girls.
I love how we finish each others sentences and know exactly what to say and not to say.
I love how we don't even have to speak to know how we are feeling, just one glance says it all.
I love how we made sure to never let anyone come in between our friendship.
I love all of the crazy memories and things we have done and been through.
I just wanted to say thank you and that I love you.
May we have 30 more blessed years of friendship.
Signed,
Me
cockconoisseur
Virgin
- Joined
- Apr 17, 2012
- Posts
- 11
Dear Buddah,
We have been through a lot together, you are the one who knows ALL of my secrets.
You are the only man I trust no questions asked with my girls.
I love how we finish each others sentences and know exactly what to say and not to say.
I love how we don't even have to speak to know how we are feeling, just one glance says it all.
I love how we made sure to never let anyone come in between our friendship.
I love all of the crazy memories and things we have done and been through.
I just wanted to say thank you and that I love you.
May we have 30 more blessed years of friendship.
Signed,
Me
My Love our friendship goes deeper than words could ever describe. You are not only my friend, you are part of my existence. Thru the ups and downs we have always stayed true to each other and no one or anything will ever change that. I love you for being you. From my heart to yours.
Signed,
Your Buddah
TongueLust
Bruja-Hija De Yemayá
- Joined
- Jun 20, 2012
- Posts
- 130,233
Dear B,
Since you posted here...
You will see this thread next time you log on in 2015
Signed,
L
Since you posted here...
You will see this thread next time you log on in 2015
Signed,
L
someoneyouknow
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jun 5, 2006
- Posts
- 28,274
Dear Mother Nature,
Why do you hate me so? Why must you give me cloudy, windy weekends which prevent me from taking pictures while giving clear, calm work days which allow the birds to use my car as the bottom of a latrine pit? Do you gain some sadistic pleasure in making sure I am unable to observe almost every celestial event through the judicious use of clouds and rain?
I am fortified against the evil, cold weather you will bring over the next few months via my newly purchased down comforter which keeps me incredibly warm, but that defense does me little good since you won't give me the sun and moisture I need.
As I say fairly often on here, stereotypes exist for a reason. Congratulations on perpetuating one about women.
Frustrated
Why do you hate me so? Why must you give me cloudy, windy weekends which prevent me from taking pictures while giving clear, calm work days which allow the birds to use my car as the bottom of a latrine pit? Do you gain some sadistic pleasure in making sure I am unable to observe almost every celestial event through the judicious use of clouds and rain?
I am fortified against the evil, cold weather you will bring over the next few months via my newly purchased down comforter which keeps me incredibly warm, but that defense does me little good since you won't give me the sun and moisture I need.
As I say fairly often on here, stereotypes exist for a reason. Congratulations on perpetuating one about women.
Frustrated
Brave Maximus
Returned White Knight
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2004
- Posts
- 8,242
Dear Bell Canada....
You've wasted a cumulative 2hrs on this matter. I cancelled my account in August... Why? Where I was moving didn't have Bell service. But, you didn't cancel my services... You have the record of me calling.... You have the record of me asking for it to happen... You didn't do it... but you want me to pay you $900 for your errors...
Instead of solving this problem, you put me on hold for 30 minutes. Then wonder why I'm upset and going to talk to my lawyer....
Yours Truly
VERY LIVID Brave Max!!!!
You've wasted a cumulative 2hrs on this matter. I cancelled my account in August... Why? Where I was moving didn't have Bell service. But, you didn't cancel my services... You have the record of me calling.... You have the record of me asking for it to happen... You didn't do it... but you want me to pay you $900 for your errors...
Instead of solving this problem, you put me on hold for 30 minutes. Then wonder why I'm upset and going to talk to my lawyer....
Yours Truly
VERY LIVID Brave Max!!!!
Dear Ignorant Peeps,
Were you never taught any manners when you were young? Please and thank you don't cost anything and are only a matter of common courtesy. You ask questions but when answered you do not the decency to reply,
Infuriated Litster
Were you never taught any manners when you were young? Please and thank you don't cost anything and are only a matter of common courtesy. You ask questions but when answered you do not the decency to reply,
Infuriated Litster
sunshinegirl05
Perfectly Imperfect
- Joined
- Jun 27, 2010
- Posts
- 65,175
Dear Friend,
You wanted her to find out. I don't think that you really thought everything through though! And now that she has found out, I think you realize just how hard it is, and how much trouble and how many issues it's causing. Granted, he has to take responsibility, too.
I wish there were a way to make this a "perfect" world....for you and him.
Hates to see you hurt, but knows that there isn't much I can do to alleviate the pain.
You wanted her to find out. I don't think that you really thought everything through though! And now that she has found out, I think you realize just how hard it is, and how much trouble and how many issues it's causing. Granted, he has to take responsibility, too.
I wish there were a way to make this a "perfect" world....for you and him.
Hates to see you hurt, but knows that there isn't much I can do to alleviate the pain.
aexoticgrl
Instigator of Naughty..
- Joined
- Nov 6, 2012
- Posts
- 3,812
Dear X,
If I wanted to be completely unsafe on my commute everyday, I would buy a motorcycle and ride it naked. I would wear a leather trench coat that could flap open at inopportune times. I would drive 150 mph trying to cause an accident every time someone saw my hot ass fly by. So to answer your question, yes I think the idiot light should be fixed. Sadly, that might require removing YOU.
Here's your sign...
If I wanted to be completely unsafe on my commute everyday, I would buy a motorcycle and ride it naked. I would wear a leather trench coat that could flap open at inopportune times. I would drive 150 mph trying to cause an accident every time someone saw my hot ass fly by. So to answer your question, yes I think the idiot light should be fixed. Sadly, that might require removing YOU.
Here's your sign...
LiveFromKorea
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2013
- Posts
- 444
Dear brain of mine,
Shutup and calm down.
Sincerely,
Me.
Shutup and calm down.
Sincerely,
Me.
Sensualdreamer
~Queen of Tease~
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2010
- Posts
- 23,462
Dear Professor:
Your assignment that you gave our class is fucking ridiculous. In consideration that you want us to cite how this asinine short story relates to human nature -and provide research- I hope you enjoy where I mentioned the sex scene - I hope that you also enjoy where I broke out and gave an "oh Gawd YES!" and a "faster, harder bitch!" comment.
Let this be a warning that I didn't fucking understand what the hell you were asking and when I email you b/c I need clarification it's not b/c I have nothing better to do.
Flipping the #1 salute at my textbook...me
Your assignment that you gave our class is fucking ridiculous. In consideration that you want us to cite how this asinine short story relates to human nature -and provide research- I hope you enjoy where I mentioned the sex scene - I hope that you also enjoy where I broke out and gave an "oh Gawd YES!" and a "faster, harder bitch!" comment.
Let this be a warning that I didn't fucking understand what the hell you were asking and when I email you b/c I need clarification it's not b/c I have nothing better to do.
Flipping the #1 salute at my textbook...me
S
sasspotsub
Guest
dear self,
get a fucking grip and come back to reality. i know you have a shred of sanity left and it's in there somewhere.
thanks in advance.
get a fucking grip and come back to reality. i know you have a shred of sanity left and it's in there somewhere.
thanks in advance.
IhateClowns
Censored
- Joined
- Feb 7, 2010
- Posts
- 25,386
Dear Diaper Genie,
What the fuck man! You're supposed to keep the smells to a minimum no???? Hey I get it. The kid can shit a ton. When I have to use 5 baby wipes and still end up digging shit out of my cuticles with a toothpick, I know the kid has fairly easy bowel movements. So the smell is extreme.
You are the diaper genie though!!! You claim to be able to keep his room smelling like anything but the stuff coming out if his butt. Either you're a liar or my kiddos shit is so extreme maybe I should be harvesting it to take over the world. Because it surely has taken over his room.
Between your subpar efforts and the subpar efforts of Fabreeze I am to the point of turning into an Asian lady and walking around with a dr.'s mask on. I may go to the coroners office tomorrow and see if I can get some if that bird poop they put under their nose prior to looking at a deceased body.
It is bad enough I am gagging and questioning him as I am changing him. It is another to gag when I open his room just to put away laundry ( yes ladies a 5 1/4" penis and also does laundry, please take a number and wait your turn).
Just do me a favor and quit burping or farting and keep that awful smell inside and away from my nostrils and weak stomach.
Thanks
What the fuck man! You're supposed to keep the smells to a minimum no???? Hey I get it. The kid can shit a ton. When I have to use 5 baby wipes and still end up digging shit out of my cuticles with a toothpick, I know the kid has fairly easy bowel movements. So the smell is extreme.
You are the diaper genie though!!! You claim to be able to keep his room smelling like anything but the stuff coming out if his butt. Either you're a liar or my kiddos shit is so extreme maybe I should be harvesting it to take over the world. Because it surely has taken over his room.
Between your subpar efforts and the subpar efforts of Fabreeze I am to the point of turning into an Asian lady and walking around with a dr.'s mask on. I may go to the coroners office tomorrow and see if I can get some if that bird poop they put under their nose prior to looking at a deceased body.
It is bad enough I am gagging and questioning him as I am changing him. It is another to gag when I open his room just to put away laundry ( yes ladies a 5 1/4" penis and also does laundry, please take a number and wait your turn).
Just do me a favor and quit burping or farting and keep that awful smell inside and away from my nostrils and weak stomach.
Thanks
LiveFromKorea
Really Really Experienced
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2013
- Posts
- 444
fireymatt
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jun 25, 2008
- Posts
- 665
The ONLY person i want to hear from on my birthday today.... i cant...
Mom... you left me wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to early...
fuck i miss ya....
this year will not .. nor will it ever be the same... u ALWAYS called me... thanks..
ill pass that on...
Mom... you left me wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to early...
fuck i miss ya....
this year will not .. nor will it ever be the same... u ALWAYS called me... thanks..
ill pass that on...
Nailinmyheart
Virgin
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2012
- Posts
- 20
.....,
Last edited:
flirtygirly
♡♡ Snuggle-Matrix ♡♡
- Joined
- Oct 10, 2009
- Posts
- 2,933
Dear ADA: you're adorable, smart, hot and sexy. Can't wait to see you again. Under my tree perhaps, wrapped up in bows?
sexy_hottie_2003
One Sexy Lady
- Joined
- Dec 8, 2002
- Posts
- 6,339
Jake
Its been 5 months since I've heard from you. I'm sorry I panicked and stupidly put you on ignore for the first 3 months of the 5. I have regretted that. I miss you. I miss our chats and the way you make me feel. I care for you and about you deeply. Just hope its not to late to get us back on track.
Steph
Its been 5 months since I've heard from you. I'm sorry I panicked and stupidly put you on ignore for the first 3 months of the 5. I have regretted that. I miss you. I miss our chats and the way you make me feel. I care for you and about you deeply. Just hope its not to late to get us back on track.
Steph
- Status
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