Confused mid ..."switch"

[prettyzomb1t]

For most of my "Sexual life" i thought my self to be very submissive... but in the past year or two i find the quiet oppisite .. i now find my self looking for a slave pet and pay pigs. also men or women interested in buying things i have worn.
i have heard of people who are "switch" and can go both ways.. but now i have no desire or interest in submission. Again i am very young and advice would and just general discussion would be great

 

[Duncan1981]

My advice to you is what I give to other's. Do what feels right.

Duncan

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

For most of my "Sexual life" i thought my self to be very submissive... but in the past year or two i find the quiet oppisite .. i now find my self looking for a slave pet and pay pigs. also men or women interested in buying things i have worn.
i have heard of people who are "switch" and can go both ways.. but now i have no desire or interest in submission. Again i am very young and advice would and just general discussion would be great

Are you actually looking to be dominant, or are you just looking for the perceived easy money of financial domination? If it's the former, good luck to you and enjoy your explorations, if it's the latter, please keep your day job.

 

[prettyzomb1t]

Thank you Duncan that is what i have been going with so far.

Lizzie :Just thought it might bring interesting conversation, obviously not looking that hard nor am desperate. i can take care of my self quiet well.

 

[BiBunny]

I guess you could call me a switch, and I tend to be this way. I'll go for awhile only wanting to top people, and then I'll go for awhile only wanting to bottom to people. It sometimes confuses people, but I don't much care, LOL. It's just rare that the two things will coexist inside me at once.

 

[prettyzomb1t]

i dont care much my self its fun to change it up a bit sometimes. but im not sure who it is confusing more them or my self lol

 

[Stella_Omega]

Sure, lots of people switch. It doesn't have to be confusing to anyone.

When someone asks, you tell them you're a switch, and although you bottom you're not submissive.

Then of course, you might have to explain what a bottom is as opposed to a sub, so you'd best do a little research about that....
Where do people get this notion that all bottoms are subs, and all subs are subs for life?

 

[Etoile]

FinDom is hard. I tried it once, and I just didn't have the energy for it...you have to be so damn creative all the time. It's not the "I am your Mistress, all pay pigs give me your cash" stuff you see on Niteflirt.

That said, yeah, it's possible to change roles. You mentioned that you're not interested in submitting anymore, so it's not switching, it's a changeover. Nothing wrong with that.

 

[switchbitch]

as the name suggests I am a switch, this can mean a lot different things to different people, for some it is just that they likemany facets of BDSM, for me there are many things that can trigger the switch. The switch is not about opportunity (however pleasant it is to be able to play with both sides of the BDSM community) it is about instinct desire and need. The quivering in my stomach when I need to be dominated and the electricity running up my spine when I need to dominate are not instigated by choice they are part of who I am.
my advice is run with what feels good and keep doing it so long as it does.

 

[Eager2TRYRU]

as the name suggests I am a switch, this can mean a lot different things to different people, for some it is just that they likemany facets of BDSM, for me there are many things that can trigger the switch. The switch is not about opportunity (however pleasant it is to be able to play with both sides of the BDSM community) it is about instinct desire and need. The quivering in my stomach when I need to be dominated and the electricity running up my spine when I need to dominate are not instigated by choice they are part of who I am.
my advice is run with what feels good and keep doing it so long as it does.

I find this a very interesting subject, either within or outside of the BDSM realm.

I read Switchbitch's post and immediately I think... isn't that most people? Don't most of us have... submissive and dominate sides, even if we don't act upon them?

For me personally, I had the typical male childhood in a typical conservative, Midwest town... so of course I was sexually "dominate" despite the occasional dreams and fantasies of being submissive. And once I found the right long term relationship where I was comfortable to allow myself to think about those submissive thoughts... and trust that I was safe to do so... it seems natural to feel dominate sometimes and submissive other times.

 

[switchbitch]

I find this a very interesting subject, either within or outside of the BDSM realm.

I read Switchbitch's post and immediately I think... isn't that most people? Don't most of us have... submissive and dominate sides, even if we don't act upon them?

For me personally, I had the typical male childhood in a typical conservative, Midwest town... so of course I was sexually "dominate" despite the occasional dreams and fantasies of being submissive. And once I found the right long term relationship where I was comfortable to allow myself to think about those submissive thoughts... and trust that I was safe to do so... it seems natural to feel dominate sometimes and submissive other times.

hhmmm, part of me agrees with you but I do think generalities are insidious. When we use the terms like; typical, most peopleand generally when referring to sexual proclivities we are trying to pigeonhole people into a little collective boxes. While the thought of finding like minded souls is comforting, We are all individuals with endless variations of likes and dislikes, and isn't that what makes it so incredibly exciting discovering and exploring with each other.

 

[Eager2TRYRU]

hhmmm, part of me agrees with you but I do think generalities are insidious. When we use the terms like; typical, most peopleand generally when referring to sexual proclivities we are trying to pigeonhole people into a little collective boxes. While the thought of finding like minded souls is comforting, We are all individuals with endless variations of likes and dislikes, and isn't that what makes it so incredibly exciting discovering and exploring with each other.

Point taken. But at least from my early years through my early 20s, based on the what my friends bragged about doing and the "crazy" things some drunken girls wanted to do but my friends said "no way" ... we were all caught up in that traditional American, small town, middle class value system.

 

[muzicbaby]

Personally I echo the above. Do what feels good while it does. If you want to be more dominant one day then go for it. If the next you want someone to dominate you have at it. My prefrence changes with my mood. I'll have one thought of being tied up and forced to submit followed by the thought of forcing a manto do as told. I don't see any problem with it. And to hell with anyone who would. LOL

 

[switchbitch]

Personally I echo the above. Do what feels good while it does. If you want to be more dominant one day then go for it. If the next you want someone to dominate you have at it. My prefrence changes with my mood. I'll have one thought of being tied up and forced to submit followed by the thought of forcing a manto do as told. I don't see any problem with it. And to hell with anyone who would. LOL

hear hear!

 

[MasterAnimus]

For most of my "Sexual life" i thought my self to be very submissive... but in the past year or two i find the quiet oppisite .. i now find my self looking for a slave pet and pay pigs. also men or women interested in buying things i have worn.
i have heard of people who are "switch" and can go both ways.. but now i have no desire or interest in submission. Again i am very young and advice would and just general discussion would be great

Go with the flow, and not with the branding or pigeon-holing yourself strictly to a specific category. As long as what you do is consentual and legal, do what you feel is right - don't overanalyze.

 

[switchbitch]

Go with the flow, and not with the branding or pigeon-holing yourself strictly to a specific category. As long as what you do is consentual and legal, do what you feel is right - don't overanalyze.

nicely put

 

[DVS]

For most of my "Sexual life" i thought my self to be very submissive... but in the past year or two i find the quiet oppisite .. i now find my self looking for a slave pet and pay pigs. also men or women interested in buying things i have worn.
i have heard of people who are "switch" and can go both ways.. but now i have no desire or interest in submission. Again i am very young and advice would and just general discussion would be great

It's not impossible for someone to change with time or mature with experience. Also, a different partner or how a partner acts can make a difference. Whatever feels right at the time, is what I'd do. Just because you have been submissive in the past doesn't mean you should dismiss your feelings to be more dominant. You might be turning into a switch or at least be able to switch with certain people.

This BDSM thing isn't an exact science. There are no real set rules. Just like most sexual things between two (or more) consenting adults...whatever feels good is good. So, you feel a little like taking control? Why limit your experiences to just submission? Expand that resume. Have fun!

 

[BillRogerBill]

I think of myself as a switch too....there's too much to like from both roles to not want to try them out .

 

[sardoniclaugh]

Nothing to be confused about.
People change. Some of us accept that.
A lot of people in BDSM (particularly the online version) have issues with control. I think you can see why such people would be attracted to BDSM. Change is very difficult to control and so a lot of people in the scene have a hard time with change.