Breaking Up With Someone You Love

[Phil333]

My girlfriend of the past six months and I broke up this afternoon. We definitly loved each other, and breaking up was incredibly hard and painful. However, despite our love it just wasn't going to work. It was definitly mutual. I think we can really be friends because after we had a nice talk and we said that we will leave the possibility open to seeing how we are in a couple of weeks. It might just be that we are so used to each other in our lives that we take for granted what we have. I dunno.

Anyway, just felt like venting how hard it was (for both of us) and your thoughts on letting go of the one you love.

-Phil

 

[Tantanah]

Sorry about that Phil.

I remember your thread from the other day when things weren't going so well.

I do understand the hurt you feel. Only time heals.

 

[T.H. Oughts]

Hugs...

 

[Jim_Henson]

I have never done the breaking up of someone I love, and I never will start.

Hopefully of course I will never have someone break up with me agian, but we cant always get what we want.

 

[nasty1]

Sorry about that, Phil. I THOUGHT I was in love, once, so, I know breaking up is difficult. But, truth be told, single can be ok. You only have YOU to look after, and, worry about. But, you CAN be single for too long, and, lonliness is a bitch, too. BELIEVE ME, I know. I've been single 21 or 23 years. Love's a damn seesaw of emotions.

 

[Cherry]

Yup ... breaking up is hard to do.

But, give it a little time and you may find out that she's feeling as badly about it as you do.

Sometimes the pain of the reality of living without someone you love is the impetus to try a little harder to make it work. It's easy to forgive when the alternative is being miserable without.

Good luck.

 

[Phil333]

She's definitly feeling badly about it. She called up a little while ago pretty upset. I had to calm her down saying that if we want to try and be friends we need to get over thinking of each other as together. Just try, a couple of weeks and see how it is.

Ya, single isn't so bad but there is that point when you want someone who really cares about you, someone you can call up if you need a hug (or a fuck ) .. You know how it is.

 

[BrenVarouse]

I know your pain well, comrade.

My girlfriend (common law wife actually) of four years broke up with me about a month ago. I of course still thought things were going along wonderfully but somewhere along the way she fell out of love with me. She said it was the hardest thing she has ever done because she still loves me, but isn't in love with me? We had always said that if we break up we would stay friends and I want to, but It's still too hard for me to think of her without thinking of us. I'm lonely all day, everyday and even when I try to think of being with other women I always just imagine being with her. I guess it doesn't help that we were eachothers firsts (in love and in bed). We were together from 17 to 21. I miss her constantly, but I suppose it's getting a little easier everyday. They say it takes two weeks for every six months you were with someone to get over them. I don't really believe that though. I think it depends on the love that you shared. There are lots of things I can't do, they were things we did together. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I completely understand how you feel. For me the hardest part has been the big empty bed I have to face every night. We bought it together and slept together in it everynight. Now I sleep alone. I miss the intimacy (that thing that goes beyond just physical sex, the thing thats almost more important, the connection?). I miss hearing her breathing next to me everynight and waking up to her beautiful face every day. She was beautiful. I knew her better than I knew myself, in body and soul... Sorry to ramble. It's therapeutic to talk (write, actually).

I too took it for granted. "you never know what you have until its gone". It's so true.

So far I don't like single life. It's lonely. And empty.

I miss the romance.

It is said that young men cannot separate between platonic love and passionate love. I wonder on that.

Here's to all those out there who have lost someone they truly love, in hopes that we all recover from a broken heart.

 

[T.H. Oughts]

Hugs to you also BrenVarouse

 

[Oilpainter]

It is painful to leave someone you love. But know also that change is good and can be a new beginning for you. Look forward and not back and you can live the life you endever to. If the relationship was not a good fit for you then it is best you moved on. Good luck.

 

[Angelus]

I know what it's like to break up with someone that you love- I mean someone that you really love. I did that with someone that I loved more than anything but after a while love was just not enough and I was losing my sanity. What I did was the most painful thing that I have ever done but I know that what I did more than lidely saved us both- although I know that anyone who reads this will think that what I did was nasty and I should have stuck it out but I had to do it and although it hurt and still will every so often it is something that I will slowly get over.

All I can say is look forward and what I'm doing- don't look back. I guess I should take my own advice on things.

 

[BrenVarouse]

"those who give the best advice often have the hardest time accepting it."

 

[Lost Cause]

Been there...done that..

Just done that not so long ago. Relationship for 2 years, I was in love, even after a while, I noticed the drift. One day she said she needed to be on her own, at first I assumed the selfish attitude of "whaddaboutme?." Then I went back to if I love someone, I want them to succeed in life without having my approval being a block. We then became friends, and after awhile, she had a bad time financially, so I had her move back in. We're more like brother/sister now, anyone you have in your life is there forever because of the shared experience you both had. She dates and I make fun of her boyfriends. Remain friends no matter what, never let them go with angry words or deeds, you may never see them again.
Get into what you like to do, something to do with self worth. Things will get cranking soon. Good luck!

*That which does not kill us, makes us stronger.