Boys or Men?

[superlittlegirl]

I just had an interesting exchange with a fellow in PM. He sent me a message complimenting my pictures and asked me where I live. I thanked him, and explained to him (in an effort to be honest from the first) that I'm not in the market for boys right now.

He returned a PM to me, and was offended that I had used the word "boys". And of course, he proceeded to tell me that he's a man.

I explained to him that "boys" is just a word I like to use, and I feel that it's ok because the world refers to women as "girls" on a near-daily basis and it's more or less accepted. I also think the word "boys" is incredibly cute, and meant affectionately, although I didn't explain this to him. It's just my signifier of choice for a human body that simultaneously houses and X and Y chromosomes.

Any thoughts on this? Should I change my manner of speech so I'm not so blatantly sexist?

--Freya

 

[LukkyKnight]

Are you running for policital office?

If it helps you weed out those who are so insecure they react like that, why would you change?

 

[Ice Cold]

Well it depends, by your choice in name, you admit you are comfortable being referered to as a girl. Some other out here might prefer the term, woman or female. I think it depends on each individual. The same with males, a large number of us would like to be referred to as men instead of boys.

 

[Wiggles]

When I'm in a condescending or flirty mood I use boys/silly boy.

When I'm particularly impressed I use men/man.

It's just slang. This particular word can set some guys off though, if they don't know you very well.

 

[AusTess]

You cant please everyone.

I was reading a thread the other day,cant remember where.

A guy described HIMSELF as white.

And all the uptight politically correct wankers jumped on him.

He should have described himself as caucasian.

Pathetic.

 

[Sillyman]

Nothing wrong with it. I certainly don't mind.

 

[Rubyfruit]

I think it depends on your level of intimacy. "Naughty boy," could be quite intoxicating to a 40 year old man under the right circumstances.

However, all men, of all ages, want to know that you think of them as men first and foremost.

 

[Liontamr]

I can think of a helluva lot worse than to be called a boy.

I tend to agree with Lukky on this.. If a male is that insecu in himself that he needs to out and out say he's "a man" as a reaction to being called "boy" then maybe calling us by that title is a good way to figure out who in fact the real men are.

 

[red_rose]

Nothing wrong with it. I certainly don't mind.

Takes a man to be comfortable being called a boy...

lol

But I agree with Wiggles...I usually use "boy" when I'm being playful/flirtatious/condescending...

 

[DevilBoy79]

you didnt say anything bad or out of the way whatever, some men act like little boys all the time and others dont, then there are the few who do at times and do at others like me, its just life

 

[unclej]

that's me...white boy..and i mean that in a really manly way.

 

[Juspar Emvan]

I'd rather be called boy than not called. Actually I like boy, from some people. My bestest calls me boy. She rocks.

 

[The Dipsomaniac]

you rang?

 

[amelia]

i usually say "boy" too...


but..i'm way to flirty all the time..

 

[Juspar Emvan]

i usually say "boy" too...


but..i'm way to flirty all the time..

*grin*

Thats a good time to be called boy. Frankly though, if a girl is flirting with me, I don't care if she calls me a wide mouthed frog.

 

[Rubyfruit]

Juspar, you sexy wide-mouthed frog, you.

 

[TheOlderGuy]

dearest freya

as far as i can see
you don't need
to change a thing

 

[Viper Vic]

I have no problem with the use of boys and girls when referring to adults. That is the way I talk; and I am from the South also.

 

[juicygirl]

Hey Freya,

I wouldn't sweat it. Girls and boys/guys and gals/ men and women the meaning surely depends on context. I say Oh you boys all the time but I don't think anyone gets offended. If they do fuck 'em its not like they live in a society that turns them into sex objects. Sorry, about the soap box guys. A nice boy, a good guy and a real man (not a macho shit, I mean a real man who gives good back rubs and doesn't make you do anything you don't want to) are not bad monikers. And sillyboy can be very cute. Lets not forget dirty boy, nasty boy, and naughty boy. The guy sounds like he was a little insecure.

Any one gives you trouble sweety I got your back.

 

[KHAN-E]

I just had an interesting exchange with a fellow in PM. He sent me a message complimenting my pictures and asked me where I live. I thanked him, and explained to him (in an effort to be honest from the first) that I'm not in the market for boys right now.

He returned a PM to me, and was offended that I had used the word "boys". And of course, he proceeded to tell me that he's a man.

I explained to him that "boys" is just a word I like to use, and I feel that it's ok because the world refers to women as "girls" on a near-daily basis and it's more or less accepted. I also think the word "boys" is incredibly cute, and meant affectionately, although I didn't explain this to him. It's just my signifier of choice for a human body that simultaneously houses and X and Y chromosomes.

Any thoughts on this? Should I change my manner of speech so I'm not so blatantly sexist?

--Freya

Hell, why not be blatantly sexist?!?!?! Boys refer to us as girls all the time.

Besides, the only difference between men and boys is the cost of their toys!

 

[Hamletmaschine]

I agree with you, superlittlegirl. I usually take it as an endearing term when a woman calls me boy.

So, where do you live?

 

[sexy-girl]

i think he should be grateful for getting a reply to his pm ... i get these same sorts of pm's and i reply back too saying same thing as you really ... i just think its polite to reply i guess ... i usually call men guys ... maybe that offends some i dont know its just a word i use much the same as you calling them boys

 

[juicygirl]

Hi superlittlegirl,

Isn't a y chromosone just a broken x. Grrrrrls rule!(I now return to my boy-friendly attitude.)

 

[harleyhog]

women(girls - females) can call me anything they want,,,,,,,,,,,so long as they remember to call me. I do answer to asshole quite often.