Bad Gift! Have I the Right to Feel Disappointed?

[fifty5]

If we ruled those out my husband wouldn't have any choices at all for me Kitchen gadgets are among the few things I love getting. A new can opener would fill me with joy--if it's a cool can opener that is. If it's just a cheapo from the drug store I might not be so thrilled.

Husband has gotten wise, however. He lets me buy my own yuletide gift and ascribe it to him. This year he "gave" me a really cool digital kitchen scale. After bringing it home and showing it to him, I hugged and kissed him and told him how much I loved it. He preened and modestly told me it t'weren't nothing and he was happy I liked his present

Women - and maybe some men - can be totally off the radar, no matter how much one loves them. Three (and her hubby) really do have this sorted. Both her and his way of dealing with digital kitchen scales (?!?) brought tears to my eyes.

Love can conquer all!

 

[3113]

dealing with digital kitchen scales (?!?)

My holiday gift. Ain't it bea-u-ti-ful!

http://www.williams-sonoma.com/wsimgs/rk/images/dp/products/200950/0002/img29m.jpg

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Steven King already did this story and called it MISERY. Its where the writer pissed off his fan.

 

[jacks4u]

Bonehead!

But not the secret Santa, the HR flunky! Had the identity of 'secret Santa' not been divulged inappropriately, you would have had no clue who had given you such a marginal gift, and been happy with it.

That Santa was tardy by a couple days speaks to the irresponsibility of the guy. But you know little if anything of Santa's life, universe, and everything. is his budget so stressed he had to scramble just to find $10 free and clear? Is he so distracted by life's drama as to overlook or forget a minor responsibility like an appropriate gift? Is he so pressed for time as to grab cheepo-chocolates on his visit to the pharmacy, along with the real object of his desire, a bottle of cough meds? or is this Santa like 75% of guys, wrapped up in his own little world, only shaking hands with our common, shared reality, when forced to? There could be other reasons as well, But they don't excuse the HR flunky.

Had this minor functionary kept the contract, as written - "Secret Santa" - the conversation here would have been much different.

 

[jacks4u]

... or is this Santa like 75% of guys, wrapped up in his own little world, only shaking hands with our common, shared reality, when forced to? ...

I know I resemble that remark! Christmas shopping is, for me, such a traumatic experience, I'd almost rather have a tooth extracted, without anesthesia.

 

[glynndah]

Our Secret Santa at school is becoming more and more like a potlatch every year. The limit's supposed to be $15 either spread out through the week with little gifts (a Coke, candy bar, trinket, etc.) each day or with one big gift at the end. However, the limit's pretty much out of the window by now. I received much more than fifteen dollars worth of loot and seem like a miser when I stuck to the agreed-upon limit.

 

[Guest]

deleted

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

But not the secret Santa, the HR flunky! Had the identity of 'secret Santa' not been divulged inappropriately, you would have had no clue who had given you such a marginal gift, and been happy with it.

That Santa was tardy by a couple days speaks to the irresponsibility of the guy. But you know little if anything of Santa's life, universe, and everything. is his budget so stressed he had to scramble just to find $10 free and clear? Is he so distracted by life's drama as to overlook or forget a minor responsibility like an appropriate gift? Is he so pressed for time as to grab cheepo-chocolates on his visit to the pharmacy, along with the real object of his desire, a bottle of cough meds? or is this Santa like 75% of guys, wrapped up in his own little world, only shaking hands with our common, shared reality, when forced to? There could be other reasons as well, But they don't excuse the HR flunky.

Had this minor functionary kept the contract, as written - "Secret Santa" - the conversation here would have been much different.

It doesnt fucking matter why he didnt fulfill Tony's psychotic fantasy. You cant buy good chocolate for ten, fifteen, or twenty dollars anyway. The purpose of a job is to trade 8 hours of work for 8 hours of pay NOT make Tony a happy camper. Wouldnt you luv to know what Old Tony spent for the gift she gave!

 

[michchick98]

We usually do a gift exchange at work, but this year with money so tight for everyone, we didn't. In the past, we set a limit of no more than $20 for anyone. Usually what I do is get some instant lottery tickets and a $10 gift card at one of the local stores. The people who have received them seem happy with that. They can buy what they want and with the instant lottery ticket, they have a chance to win money! Who doesn't love that? Gifts I've received from others I work with have been along the same lines, usually a gift card and a couple instant tickets. I'm happy with that.

I'd be disappointed with the thoughtless gift as well, Tony. Maybe if you draw his name next year, get him something even more inappropriate than he got you. Send him a message that way.

Hope everyone had a good Christmas!

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

We usually do a gift exchange at work, but this year with money so tight for everyone, we didn't. In the past, we set a limit of no more than $20 for anyone. Usually what I do is get some instant lottery tickets and a $10 gift card at one of the local stores. The people who have received them seem happy with that. They can buy what they want and with the instant lottery ticket, they have a chance to win money! Who doesn't love that? Gifts I've received from others I work with have been along the same lines, usually a gift card and a couple instant tickets. I'm happy with that.

I'd be disappointed with the thoughtless gift as well, Tony. Maybe if you draw his name next year, get him something even more inappropriate than he got you. Send him a message that way.

Hope everyone had a good Christmas!

Good for you!

Scratch-offs, gift cards, or cash do the trick every time.

 

[SlickTony]

But not the secret Santa, the HR flunky! Had the identity of 'secret Santa' not been divulged inappropriately, you would have had no clue who had given you such a marginal gift, and been happy with it.

That Santa was tardy by a couple days speaks to the irresponsibility of the guy. But you know little if anything of Santa's life, universe, and everything. is his budget so stressed he had to scramble just to find $10 free and clear? Is he so distracted by life's drama as to overlook or forget a minor responsibility like an appropriate gift? Is he so pressed for time as to grab cheepo-chocolates on his visit to the pharmacy, along with the real object of his desire, a bottle of cough meds? or is this Santa like 75% of guys, wrapped up in his own little world, only shaking hands with our common, shared reality, when forced to? There could be other reasons as well, But they don't excuse the HR flunky.

Had this minor functionary kept the contract, as written - "Secret Santa" - the conversation here would have been much different.

Our HR person is not a flunky, really, but you're right, there was no reason for her to have told me who my Secret Santa was; had I not known, I wouldn't have been bothered over what the gift turned out to be.

As for Santa's life, universe and everything, I'm quite sure he did not have to scramble to find $10 free and clear. He has a whole world of IT and software engineering he does on the outside, not to mention flamenco guitar lessons, all of which he likes better than what he's doing for my company. He is the owner of one of these phones which does everything the computer I'm working on right now can, and he pays over $300 a month for the service attached to it. Eventually I suppose I'll stop fuming over it, but if I should ever draw his name for the gift exchange, I shall kill him with kindness: I'll get him the gift card for Penzey's or the bag of garam masala flavored roasted cashews.

 

[jacks4u]

It doesnt fucking matter why he didnt fulfill Tony's psychotic fantasy. You cant buy good chocolate for ten, fifteen, or twenty dollars anyway. The purpose of a job is to trade 8 hours of work for 8 hours of pay NOT make Tony a happy camper. Wouldnt you luv to know what Old Tony spent for the gift she gave!

Of course, you're right, about the chocolates and the job. BUT at some point we all have to work with the folks we work with. That sounds asinine, I know, but bear with me a second. We have to get along at some level with co-workers. Don't necessarily have to like them, just get along. Apparently at Tony's work, they had the option to opt into or out of the 'secret Santa' program. The guy opted in, then belatedly fulfilled his self-imposed obligation. He didn't have to. could have opted out and saved himself the hassle.

Our HR person is not a flunky, really, but you're right, there was no reason for her to have told me who my Secret Santa was; had I not known, I wouldn't have been bothered over what the gift turned out to be.

And that's the point I was trying to make.
But as JBJ so aptly pointed out:

You cant buy good chocolate for ten, fifteen, or twenty dollars anyway.

As for Santa's life, universe and everything, I'm quite sure he did not have to scramble to find $10 free and clear. He has a whole world of IT and software engineering he does on the outside, not to mention flamenco guitar lessons, all of which he likes better than what he's doing for my company. He is the owner of one of these phones which does everything the computer I'm working on right now can, and he pays over $300 a month for the service attached to it. Eventually I suppose I'll stop fuming over it, but if I should ever draw his name for the gift exchange, I shall kill him with kindness: I'll get him the gift card for Penzey's or the bag of garam masala flavored roasted cashews.

Sometimes the complications in a person's life aren't evident. He could have two complete family's that don't know about each other (Plot bunny alert!) Or be so distracted by his other jobs and contractual obligations as to not have enough time to do the things he's obligated to do. I was in that boat once - Full time student during the day and 12 hour nights in the IC chip factory. Add to that two hours of commuting each way, and I didn't even have time to sleep some days, let alone shop for a 'secret Santa' gift. But that was me, not your co-worker. And I'm not trying to offer excuses as much as say "temper your response until you understand the roots of his failure"

 

[Jenny_Jackson]

I would nuke his desk

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

JACKS4U

The guy did what he agreed to do and TONY feels entitled to more.

This will surprise you, I'm certain, but I'm not a go along-get along guy at work. But my mom said I was the only one of her kids she could trust.

 

[jacks4u]

JACKS4U

The guy did what he agreed to do and TONY feels entitled to more.

This will surprise you, I'm certain, but I'm not a go along-get along guy at work. But my mom said I was the only one of her kids she could trust.

James,

Of course he did. A day late - well, maybe two. but no matter there, he got the job done.

I'm just trying to give her reasons to rethink her emotions on the subject. I refuse to resort to personal attacks on anyone. here, there, anywhere. period. The message is open for discussion, attack, whatever - but the messenger, nope.

I would have never figured you to be the kind that got lil notes on your report card 'Does not play well with others...' [/sarcasm]

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

James,

Of course he did. A day late - well, maybe two. but no matter there, he got the job done.

I'm just trying to give her reasons to rethink her emotions on the subject. I refuse to resort to personal attacks on anyone. here, there, anywhere. period. The message is open for discussion, attack, whatever - but the messenger, nope.

I would have never figured you to be the kind that got lil notes on your report card 'Does not play well with others...' [/sarcasm]

TONY needs a personal attack becuz she's either lying or psychotic. If the guy was ugly and bought her Godiva candy, she'd be here screaming sexual harassment, and all the sob-sisters would be encouraging her with THAT nonsense, too. Its the classic bullshit women play...if youre cute and stick with the gift limit youre a cad; if youre ugly and do more youre a disgusting pervert.

 

[CharleyH]

Jesus Charley, read the post before you respond to it. And just maybe-- skim the rest of the pages before you do...

Jesus, Stella, don't get so testy. I did read it until I got bored and responded as I saw fit in the moment. I might have better stated, JUST BE HAPPY. It's fucking Christmas.

 

[oggbashan]

... It's fucking Christmas.

Christmas Fucking? Where? Am I missing out? Is CharleyH involved?

If so, I am missing out.

Sigh.

Og

 

[CharleyH]

Christmas Fucking? Where? Am I missing out? Is CharleyH involved?

If so, I am missing out.

Sigh.

Og

LOL! God, you are sexy in your tartan skirt, Og. What do you wear under it? Just your bagpipes?

 

[oggbashan]

LOL! God, you are sexy in your tartan skirt, Og. What do you wear under it? Just your bagpipes?

No one with any trace of Scots blood in them wears anything under a kilt.

As Henry VIII I should wear a large codpiece to emphasise my majesty, but the organisers thought small children might ask too many awkward questions...

Og

 

[CharleyH]

No one with any trace of Scots blood in them wears anything under a kilt.

As Henry VIII I should wear a large codpiece to emphasise my majesty, but the organisers thought small children might ask too many awkward questions...

Og

LOL- I hope to get a lot of upskirt shots with my camera when I visit Scotland, then!

We saw Henry's cod piece in London. It is ... pornographic! We have pics. Do you think King Henry was THAT large in reality?

 

[Dragonlipz]

In reply to the original post:
You should neither feel disappointed nor should you complain. If you are like myself, you're damned lucky to be getting anything at all, much less something you like or would cherish....

 

[3113]

In reply to the original post:
You should neither feel disappointed nor should you complain. If you are like myself, you're damned lucky to be getting anything at all, much less something you like or would cherish....

Um, so if Secret Santa sends you a piece of dog shit, you'll feel damned lucky rather than disappointed or complaining?

 

[Trinique_Fire]

Here's my take on it...

1) You weren't supposed to know who your SS person was. Your HR person made a mistake by telling you.

2) Fake it. Even if you don't love the gift, put on a smile anyway. We did SS at my job, and some of the gifts were shit, but everyone was sweet and polite about the whole thing.

3) I'm not sure dwelling on this is such a good idea.

4) He may not get the point if you "kill him with kindness."

 

[oggbashan]

LOL- I hope to get a lot of upskirt shots with my camera when I visit Scotland, then!

We saw Henry's cod piece in London. It is ... pornographic! We have pics. Do you think King Henry was THAT large in reality?

Probably not, but as King he had to have the largest codpiece around.

For his time, he was a large man, even before he became grossly overweight. He was at least a head taller than most men at Court. However, like very large men today, he rarely had to fight anyone. The only time he mock-wrestled with the French King, Francis, he was floored easily.

If what was inside his codpiece was in proportion to the rest of his body, he was probably well-endowed, but modern research suggests that there is no statistical relationship between size of feet and size of penis. His feet were US size 14.

Og