Are women really THAT easy?

[BigM]

My wife said something the other day that just floored me. Men, she believes, would be shocked to find out how easy it is to pick up women. She guessed that a normal (non-repulsive) guy could score with half – half! – the available women out there. All he needs is a smile and a confident approach. After that, she’s basically his if he has the courage to ask.

Well, my wife is a bit of a straight arrow, so her comment threw me for a loop. I didn’t want to press her for examples, for fear she’d think I was getting ideas.

So I turn to you, wise women of Literotica: Depending on circumstances, is it really that easy for a regular Joe to score with a woman? And if so, why do we guys mess it up so often?

 

[phoenix1224]

Coming from a guy:

I'd have to say that (based on my own personal experience) yes, it IS that easy to pick up women.

A smile, confidence (especially confidence), and a friendly approach will get you very far with women.

Haven't you ever noticed while you're in a bar how the guys that appraoch women with stupid lines usually get shot down, while the guys that just sit down next to them and talk to them like human beings wind up leaving with them?

 

[BigM]

True, Phoenix. What stunned me was my wife's belief that most regular guys simply don't ask -- well, the jerks slobber and ask all the time, and the wimps kinda beg. But the regular Joes like us? We'd be amazed how easy it is -- my wife's words -- if we weren't so damn polite.

 

[phoenix1224]

True, Phoenix. What stunned me was my wife's belief that most regular guys simply don't ask -- well, the jerks slobber and ask all the time, and the wimps kinda beg. But the regular Joes like us? We'd be amazed how easy it is -- my wife's words -- if we weren't so damn polite.

Hell... Most of the time, I never even had to ask... It was just OFFERED...

 

[entitled]

...just sit down next to them and talk to them like human beings...

Bing!

There's the malfunction right there.

Most of the regular Joes out there either are too shy to do this, too short of confidence to try, or don't want to ruin their image so never leave their buddies to give it a shot. If more men would do this - sit down and talk to us like humans - there sure would be a lot less sexual frustration in the world.

 

[Munachi]

well, yes and no, i'd say. at least for myself, there is a quite high percentage of guys i just wouldn't have sex with, because they don't attract me. but then, there are also quite a few guys who i would have sex with if i wasn't too shy to hit on them myself.

and yes, talking to her like a human is a good idea. and not bringing across any ideas of wondering if she is "easy" and whether you can "score", but instead of that sex is something both want - not something she tries to hold back and you try to bring her to do.

 

[BigM]

... and not bringing across any ideas of wondering if she is "easy" and whether you can "score", but instead of that sex is something both want - not something she tries to hold back and you try to bring her to do.

That was a bad choice of words on my part, Munachi.

Here's another harsh phrase (but for lack of a better one): It seems like the average Joes need to learn how to "close the deal." Let's say, after a bit of polite flirting, a decent guy just comes out and says to you, "You know what, I think you're incredibly sexy. I really want you."

What are the chances you'll:

A. Slap him into the next time zone.
B. Fuck him into the next time zone.

 

[bytor2112]

Hell... Most of the time, I never even had to ask... It was just OFFERED...

excuse me while i laugh really hard...

is your name bond..james bond..

dick..

 

[phoenix1224]

excuse me while i laugh really hard...

is your name bond..james bond..

dick..

Jealous?


BTW... It's nice to see that your parents are trusting you enough again to leave you home alone...

 

[SwEeT_LiL_LadY]

lol it wont be a cake walk for a guy to get to know me...it takes time

 

[DarkDuchess]

It's all about confidence. A man who is confident can have close to any woman he wanted. I think the same can be said of women as well.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

It's all about confidence. A man who is confident can have close to any woman he wanted. I think the same can be said of women as well.

that's pretty much exactly what I'd say here. I know I've picked up a few guys while I've been out at a bar, and I dont consider myself the most attractive woman out there. It really is about confidence and how comfortable you are with yourself.

 

[hogjack]

And velcro makes it a lot easier.

 

[Avery_Chisholm]

Bing!

There's the malfunction right there.

Most of the regular Joes out there either are too shy to do this, too short of confidence to try, or don't want to ruin their image so never leave their buddies to give it a shot. If more men would do this - sit down and talk to us like humans - there sure would be a lot less sexual frustration in the world.

AMEN!

 

[crazybbwgirl]

Hell... Most of the time, I never even had to ask... It was just OFFERED...

I agree! Because most of the time you guys are so dense you'd never think to offer it yourselves! geesh.

When we first met, my lover would meet me out and we'd wind up in a dark corner of the bar and mash for hours. We did this for months. I thought I was going to go insane. Finally one day I just took his arm, dragged him out to my car, drove him home and fucked him silly. Later he said "gee, I don't know what I was waiting for"

men - gotta love 'em.

 

[zerimar1231]

With me personally, NO, i'm not THAT easy. But i have found that other women are. Go to a bar, hit on a girl, tell her what she wants, you'll have her in bed. Not all women, but a lot are like that. It's sad bc if i were at a bar i wouldn't want to be thought as easy, but then again, why would i go to a bar?

 

[Munachi]

again, as i said before, the word "easy" bothers me quite a bit. i know there are guys (and women) who will think that, and i hope i can usually make them out and not have sex with those, as i prefer to have sex with guys who realize that i am not having sex because i am easy or weak or whatever, but because i enjoy it.

of course sex with someone you just met is not for everyone, and that is fine, i know quite a few guys just as i know quite a few girls who aren#t into it. but to say of those who are they are easy ... ?

i mean, just the word "easy" implies that it would be something not the woman wants but the guy, and the easy one is the one who can't defend herself much against it.

and anyway, what is sad about someone doing what they enjoy?

 

[hurricane64]

I don't know why it's so hard to open up and talk about it, or ask for it. Maybe it's the conditioning many of us have. Or that the woman will think that's all we want them for and reject us for sure.

Most of the time I've gotten it when I really wanted it and thought I could get it, but I can't remember ever having asked for it outright. Well, one time I did after a lot of beer in a cellar bar in Georgetown, and that turned out to be a complete disaster.

Despite this, I still have trouble with sending PMs here. Go figure...

 

[Willing and Unsure]

again, as i said before, the word "easy" bothers me quite a bit. i know there are guys (and women) who will think that, and i hope i can usually make them out and not have sex with those, as i prefer to have sex with guys who realize that i am not having sex because i am easy or weak or whatever, but because i enjoy it.

of course sex with someone you just met is not for everyone, and that is fine, i know quite a few guys just as i know quite a few girls who aren#t into it. but to say of those who are they are easy ... ?

i mean, just the word "easy" implies that it would be something not the woman wants but the guy, and the easy one is the one who can't defend herself much against it.

and anyway, what is sad about someone doing what they enjoy?

After reading the thread and some of the responses from the thread starter even, I think the intention was more of 'Are women really that easy to pick up?' At least that's the feeling that I got from this. And again, my answer to that question is it really is all about confidence levels. If a guy is confident, but not arrogant, then he's got a good shot of going home with someone, be it for a night of sex or for a cup of coffee.

Whenever I'm out with friends and such, you can tell the women that are easy in comparison to the women that aren't. It's a bit obvious, and the strange thing is that the guys, with the exception of the ones that are out just to get laid, are trying to be with/near the women that are obviously not easy.

 

[HybridCrow]

You know, as I guy, I REALLY find this hard to believe. I'm not great looking, but I can't possibly be fugly either. However, I have other probably much BETTER qualities about myself that a woman would enjoy. No, not talking about my dick, gutterbrains. I'm talking about having conversations, flirting (I finally realized I DO flirt), etc.

I AM a very confident guy. My only problem is, I've been rejected too often that I don't want to ask anyone else out. What do I do? I just play it cool and talk to them instead. If anything happens, it happens.

There's this one girl I'm particularly interested in, but the one problem is, she was the girl who started up my Direct Deposit checking account. Therefore, she works at the bank nearby where I work. So... she probably doesn't date clients. The only reason I find her interesting is that the other day, instead of calling me at home about a bank related paper to sign, she came running up to me when she saw me working and asked me to sign a paper that she needed me to sign for my bank account. It got me curious and thinking. I ALMOST asked her out too, but I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of customers AND her co-workers. Next time I'm just going to ask her when she goes on break because I'd like to talk to her.


Anyhow, if it is so easy, ask your wife what she thinks I should do in this situation?

Ciao.

 

[Willing and Unsure]

Anyhow, if it is so easy, ask your wife what she thinks I should do in this situation?

Ciao.

I'm no expert here being a woman and all, but I'd say that it isnt easy to pick up women, but it's easier than a lot of men think. For your situation, I'd say go for it. Really, the worst that she can do is say no. But at least then you'll know one way or the other about the situation and you can move on.

 

[BigM]

I'm no expert here being a woman and all, but I'd say that it isnt easy to pick up women, but it's easier than a lot of men think...

You've probably hit the proverbial nail on the head, Willing.

The trick is getting that average Joe to work up enough nerve to make a very forward pass WITHOUT fear of looking like a sleazy jerk. That man could make millions teaching the rest of the Joe's how it's done.

 

[phoenix1224]

I agree! Because most of the time you guys are so dense you'd never think to offer it yourselves! geesh.

men - gotta love 'em.

But only 15 minutes after first meeting!?

That actually happened once.

I need a BIT more time than THAT... Maybe 30 or 40 minutes...

 

[crazybbwgirl]

But only 15 minutes after first meeting!?
That actually happened once.
I need a BIT more time than THAT... Maybe 30 or 40 minutes...

Sometimes 15 min. is all it takes! hehe

 

[phoenix1224]

Sometimes 15 min. is all it takes! hehe

Apparently so...