Any advice with an oversized penis problem?

[MidnightVixen]

*taps foot impatiently*

Maybe his over sized cock ate him?

 

[sophieloves]

page 52


Some Advice for Well-Endowed Men
- Part 2 -

Technique

Although the vagina is ready for penetration now and the uterus is pulled back, you could still be causing pain by hitting the cervix with your long penis. The most important thing for you to give her pleasure instead of pain is to have a hard erection. When you have a weak erection, you can't control the angle of penetration. All your penis will do is slide in and out like a soft sausage and hit the cervix upon each stroke. A hard erection allows you to direct your penetration to those places that feel good for her.

The best is to enter in an upward angle so that the tip and the upper part of your penis slide over the upper wall of her vagina. The head of your penis skims the cervix without striking it and ends up next to it in the concave part of the back of the vagina. This technique doesn't just spare her from the frontal banging of the uterus but increases her stimulation tenfold by causing friction and pressure at those places that are the most sensitive to her.

Following this method, many women will achieve a very intensive vaginal or uterine orgasm. Especially the parts in the back of the vagina next to the uterus mouth seem to be very responsive to rhythmical thumping of the penis and can build up a powerful energy before releasing it into an earthquake-like orgasm.


Penetration problems because your penis is too thick

If you encounter penetration problems because of a very thick penis then tenting of the vagina is also a major requirement before entering, since it makes the vagina expand a lot in width as well. Depending on the individual woman, this can vary from two to four inches in diameter. The vagina opening usually stays tighter than that, especially if the girl is a bit tense or over excited. Therefore, if you have a very thick penis tell your woman to concentrate on relaxing her vagina muscles.

You should also add plenty of lubrication, unless she is very wet by herself. Don't forget that women are not always as wet as they could or should be. Hormonal changes or emotional distress can have a big influence on it. If because of an unusual large penis head you have a difficult time entering her vagina, then try not to be too erected when inserting your penis. Easier said than done of course if you are excited, but at least squeeze some blood away from the head.


What if your penis is extremely big?

Girls often say they prefer girth to length but if your penis measures ten inches or more in circumference, you know life is tough. You are searching the Internet for help but all you find is a bunch of men complaining that their penises are too small. Nobody gives a damn about your problems. Nobody cares that every day you become more depressed because you haven't lost your virginity yet, since none of the girls so far has been able to take your size. Hell, you would even be happy with a simple blowjob but you haven't found a girl that can take your knob in her mouth. The one that tried had to go to the hospital to fix her dislocated jaw. Nobody cares that all you can get from a girl is a hand job and not even a good one, because both her hands together hardly reach around your shaft. Even masturbating yourself is a labor for you. Keeping an erection for too long makes you dizzy. Women love watching your penis but only because you are a freak show to them. You would do everything you can to shrink your penis, even if it would require taking female hormone pills that grow you bitch-tits, but you know there is nothing you can do. You hate walking around the town because there is no way you can hide your ridiculously big bulge. You have gone swimming only once in your adult life, vowing never to return after you scared those screaming people out of the pool. But when you think back about it, you realize it is better that way. It takes you too long putting on those swimming trunks anyway, obligated to reinforce them with straps around your waist so that the weight of your penis doesn't pull them down. No, nature hasn't been easy on you, and you could do without all the penis size talks.

 

[bronzeage]

page 52


Some Advice for Well-Endowed Men
- Part 2 -

Technique

...


Penetration problems because your penis is too thick

If you encounter penetration problems because of a very thick penis then tenting of the vagina is also a major requirement before entering, since it makes the vagina expand a lot in width as well. Depending on the individual woman, this can vary from two to four inches in diameter. The vagina opening usually stays tighter than that, especially if the girl is a bit tense or over excited. Therefore, if you have a very thick penis tell your woman to concentrate on relaxing her vagina muscles.


[...

My wife won't even consider a campout. I can't imagine what she would say if I wanted to tent her vagina. Could we use a camping trailer? Most of them have a toilet and shower.

 

[Redneck_Cowboy]

12" in circumference? my calves aren't 12" in circumference..

Please give us a full list of your measurements since you are sharing.

 

[sophieloves]

My wife won't even consider a campout. I can't imagine what she would say if I wanted to tent her vagina. Could we use a camping trailer? Most of them have a toilet and shower.

hehehehe

you know me, just trying to be helpful

 

[sweet_bitch]

8 inches long and 12 inches in circumference

12" in circumference? my calves aren't 12" in circumference.
put away the crack pipe, son.

Mr Hester spik truth. Me theenks you is smoke hash all day!
Who your suplyer?

 

[SoaringAdonis]

page 52


Some Advice for Well-Endowed Men
- Part 2 -

Technique

Although the vagina is ready for penetration now and the uterus is pulled back, you could still be causing pain by hitting the cervix with your long penis. The most important thing for you to give her pleasure instead of pain is to have a hard erection. When you have a weak erection, you can't control the angle of penetration. All your penis will do is slide in and out like a soft sausage and hit the cervix upon each stroke. A hard erection allows you to direct your penetration to those places that feel good for her.

The best is to enter in an upward angle so that the tip and the upper part of your penis slide over the upper wall of her vagina. The head of your penis skims the cervix without striking it and ends up next to it in the concave part of the back of the vagina. This technique doesn't just spare her from the frontal banging of the uterus but increases her stimulation tenfold by causing friction and pressure at those places that are the most sensitive to her.

Following this method, many women will achieve a very intensive vaginal or uterine orgasm. Especially the parts in the back of the vagina next to the uterus mouth seem to be very responsive to rhythmical thumping of the penis and can build up a powerful energy before releasing it into an earthquake-like orgasm.


Penetration problems because your penis is too thick

If you encounter penetration problems because of a very thick penis then tenting of the vagina is also a major requirement before entering, since it makes the vagina expand a lot in width as well. Depending on the individual woman, this can vary from two to four inches in diameter. The vagina opening usually stays tighter than that, especially if the girl is a bit tense or over excited. Therefore, if you have a very thick penis tell your woman to concentrate on relaxing her vagina muscles.

You should also add plenty of lubrication, unless she is very wet by herself. Don't forget that women are not always as wet as they could or should be. Hormonal changes or emotional distress can have a big influence on it. If because of an unusual large penis head you have a difficult time entering her vagina, then try not to be too erected when inserting your penis. Easier said than done of course if you are excited, but at least squeeze some blood away from the head.


What if your penis is extremely big?

Girls often say they prefer girth to length but if your penis measures ten inches or more in circumference, you know life is tough. You are searching the Internet for help but all you find is a bunch of men complaining that their penises are too small. Nobody gives a damn about your problems. Nobody cares that every day you become more depressed because you haven't lost your virginity yet, since none of the girls so far has been able to take your size. Hell, you would even be happy with a simple blowjob but you haven't found a girl that can take your knob in her mouth. The one that tried had to go to the hospital to fix her dislocated jaw. Nobody cares that all you can get from a girl is a hand job and not even a good one, because both her hands together hardly reach around your shaft. Even masturbating yourself is a labor for you. Keeping an erection for too long makes you dizzy. Women love watching your penis but only because you are a freak show to them. You would do everything you can to shrink your penis, even if it would require taking female hormone pills that grow you bitch-tits, but you know there is nothing you can do. You hate walking around the town because there is no way you can hide your ridiculously big bulge. You have gone swimming only once in your adult life, vowing never to return after you scared those screaming people out of the pool. But when you think back about it, you realize it is better that way. It takes you too long putting on those swimming trunks anyway, obligated to reinforce them with straps around your waist so that the weight of your penis doesn't pull them down. No, nature hasn't been easy on you, and you could do without all the penis size talks.

Hey just came back, didn't expect this thread to pick up. That last passage is funny...reminds me of the first handful of times I was trying sex...I thought it was anatomically impossible. If you actually wrote that I would suggest you publish a book on the matter!

Also I really am not joking about my size. I guess I have what is called a "chode"...errr sophmoric slang aside...I really have a 12 inch circumference. I am 6 foot 1, have 13 inch feet, large hands and fingers...but I cannot wrap my fingers around it with one hand when its in full size.
Anyways, thanks for the feedback, either serious or silly!

 

[Delicacy]

Hey just came back, didn't expect this thread to pick up. That last passage is funny...reminds me of the first handful of times I was trying sex...I thought it was anatomically impossible. If you actually wrote that I would suggest you publish a book on the matter!

Also I really am not joking about my size. I guess I have what is called a "chode"...errr sophmoric slang aside...I really have a 12 inch circumference. I am 6 foot 1, have 13 inch feet, large hands and fingers...but I cannot wrap my fingers around it with one hand when its in full size.
Anyways, thanks for the feedback, either serious or silly!

I believe you.
My friend also has problems with his large penis.

http://www.launchimages.com/out.php/i5002_1.jpg

 

[sophieloves]

Hey just came back, didn't expect this thread to pick up. That last passage is funny...reminds me of the first handful of times I was trying sex...I thought it was anatomically impossible. If you actually wrote that I would suggest you publish a book on the matter!

Also I really am not joking about my size. I guess I have what is called a "chode"...errr sophmoric slang aside...I really have a 12 inch circumference. I am 6 foot 1, have 13 inch feet, large hands and fingers...but I cannot wrap my fingers around it with one hand when its in full size.
Anyways, thanks for the feedback, either serious or silly!

lifted clean off the net, matey. if i'd have written it i would have spelled the words properly

 

[ksmybuttons]

sorry - this is completely wrong

he states (however true or false) 8" long erect, 12" circumference

now, in front of me i have a roll of sellotape.. it measures 11" circumference, and its diameter is 3 and a half inches so a circ of 12" is going to equate to a diam of approx 3 and 3/4"

1 and 7/8'S???? thought I was bad at math

You didn't read the post I was quoting. Corruptible said his was half the size of the original posters. The 1 7/8 is Corruptible's penis diameter from his post although he later clarified that his is actually only 1 3/4 inches in diameter.

Earlier in the thread, at post 31, I had already done the calculations for the thread starters post. I then went to my cupboard and measure a standard can of soup which was 2.5 inches in diameter and then measure a 26 ounce can of tomatoes which was 3.75 inches in diameter. That is when I was able to calculate that his declared penis is the size of two fist and two arms and maybe even one of hester's legs.

That would never be allowed in my vagina...

This is why one reads the entire thread before calling someone out. Boy, is there egg on your face.

And yes, sometimes I have way too much time on my hands.

 

[Guest]

Hey I am new here and want some advice. Has anyone here had penis reduction surgery? I have an oversized penis that when erect is 8 inches long and 12 inches in circumference ( I also have abnormally muscular thighs from extreme exercise). Wearing jeans or suit pants always leaves a large protrusion on the front of my pants and unless I am wearing a large jacket or something some SOME people will leer at the front of my pants. It usually not an issue but sometimes I feel obscene, like once I found out that when I was running in runners athletic shorts that because of my girth my entire penis was revealed in the outling of the shorts...all these weird things crop up and it embarasses. I mean I know its a popular idea to have a big package but this also creates problems with me and my girlfriend where she will become injured from lubricated sex and will bleed all of the next day.

I don't think I can afford a surgery but was wondering what it was like (I would never do it if it cause deformity or lessen sensation).

Any advice? And is this really problem?

ROFL!!!

This guy's so full of shit his eyebrows stink! Is there a pool going yet as to his age?

 

[MidnightVixen]

I believe you.
My friend also has problems with his large penis.

http://www.launchimages.com/out.php/i5002_1.jpg

Goodness, and not in an good way either.

 

[IrezumiKiss]

Also I really am not joking about my size. I guess I have what is called a "chode"...errr sophmoric slang aside...I really have a 12 inch circumference. I am 6 foot 1, have 13 inch feet, large hands and fingers...but I cannot wrap my fingers around it with one hand when its in full size.
Anyways, thanks for the feedback, either serious or silly!

Guy...give up already. It was cute. We laughed, we cried, it became a part of us. Now the joke is way past it's sell-by date. Don't fuck up your chance to opt out quietly, stage left. We're a forgiving bunch to those who make us smile, but when you keep pushing it you get on our bullshit nerves.

Unless you have a part-time job at a genetic manipulation facility, there's no human male penis with your size existing on this planet. And if it WERE for real, you'd either be suffering from way too many medical and emotional problems to be posting on an erotica website, or be looking for stable work as a freakshow in a traveling roadside carnival.

If you still want to play, then take a picture and put it on the glass. If you can't do that, then you know what to do with your imaginary friend.

And it's "choad."

 

[sophieloves]

You didn't read the post I was quoting. Corruptible said his was half the size of the original posters. The 1 7/8 is Corruptible's penis diameter from his post although he later clarified that his is actually only 1 3/4 inches in diameter.

Earlier in the thread, at post 31, I had already done the calculations for the thread starters post. I then went to my cupboard and measure a standard can of soup which was 2.5 inches in diameter and then measure a 26 ounce can of tomatoes which was 3.75 inches in diameter. That is when I was able to calculate that his declared penis is the size of two fist and two arms and maybe even one of hester's legs.

That would never be allowed in my vagina...

This is why one reads the entire thread before calling someone out. Boy, is there egg on your face.

And yes, sometimes I have way too much time on my hands.

no egg, no face... a simple oversight for which i apologise. all too often a post 'appears' after refreshing that didn't show up before, or the language used is open to ambiguous interpretation.

 

[Alt]

That would never be allowed in my vagina...

Prude!

 

[Nawtee]

Date chicks who have had kids. You'll have no worries about hurting her then.

She's pushed a watermellon out of her cunt for gods sake.

 

[Delicacy]

Okay. I was curious just what 12" looked like. This jar is 12" in circumference. A CD is about a 14" circumference. As much as I appreciate a plus-size penis, I call bullshit until he posts actual evidence of his monstrous organ.

http://i100.photobucket.com/albums/m27/akparrothead1/100_4555.jpg

 

[Image]

Holy Brisless, Batman! Where'd you get that photo, Del?

Yep, looks like we're going to need proof of this monster. We're a suspicious bunch here on the GB, though with the right camera angle it may work for you in AmPics...

 

[Delicacy]

Holy Brisless, Batman! Where'd you get that photo, Del?

Yep, looks like we're going to need proof of this monster. We're a suspicious bunch here on the GB, though with the right camera angle it may work for you in AmPics...

I have no idea where I got it. It's been in my porn folder.

Maybe that's where he is, taking pictures. Either that or reregistering with a new name.

 

[ksmybuttons]

I have no idea where I got it. It's been in my porn folder.

Maybe that's where he is, taking pictures. Either that or reregistering with a new name.

Ha!!!

 

[lilfrk]

I have no idea where I got it. It's been in my porn folder.

Maybe that's where he is, taking pictures. Either that or reregistering with a new name.

I know I was supposed to be looking at that guys cock in the picture but the first thing that popped in my head was "Why doesn't that bed have sheets on it?"

 

[IrezumiKiss]

I have no idea where I got it. It's been in my porn folder.

Maybe that's where he is, taking pictures. Either that or reregistering with a new name.

With a dick that heavy and wide at his crotch, he should change his name from "SoaringAdonis" to "LimpingAdonis."

I almost feel sorry for newbies coming in here trying to be cute with their first-time dirty humor and then attempting to stick with it like we've never heard this before. Then the virtual egg sticks to their face everytime they post trying to play it straight. Not nowhere near as bad as being an online asshole on purpose, but still. Why waste your time and a good account over a dumb, tired-assed big dick joke?

 

[ksmybuttons]

I know I was supposed to be looking at that guys cock in the picture but the first thing that popped in my head was "Why doesn't that bed have sheets on it?"

That made me think about the mess he would make when he ejaculated. Then, of course, the next thought was (if it was real), "Does he make more cum than an average man?" If he did, it wouldn't ever make it out of that penis.


Of course, the other option is that he's lying on a very small bed and he's only 3 feet tall...

 

[Delicacy]

I know I was supposed to be looking at that guys cock in the picture but the first thing that popped in my head was "Why doesn't that bed have sheets on it?"

I cannot stand beds without sheets.

The first thing I thought was why do his testicles look like overgrown peach pits.
http://www.michiganpeach.org/facts/pit.jpg

 

[lilfrk]

That made me think about the mess he would make when he ejaculated. Then, of course, the next thought was (if it was real), "Does he make more cum than an average man?" If he did, it wouldn't ever make it out of that penis.


Of course, the other option is that he's lying on a very small bed and he's only 3 feet tall...

Does this mean that we've hung out here so long we are desensatized(sp) to cock pictures?

ETA: I've seen a lot of cocks in my life due to my job. I'm confident that is a photoshop.