Amf

[Aurora Black]

It's time to move forward towards a better and happier life.

 

[SEVERUSMAX]

you have to follow what you believe. would it serve any purpose to tell him now? how will he react? will he stoop to promising and begging and can you deal with those promises with indifference? will you still leave if he promises hell quit 'this time'?
sweetie, you've given and given to an ill person. hes knocked you down so many times before. do you trust that you are strong enough to ignore his pleas?
this time, this time...its you that you have to worry about.

Sounds like my gf's ex in some ways. He'd always promise to do better, and 2 or 3 weeks later, he'd back to normal- bad normal, that is. Finally, she got fed up, which was good for her (as well as for me, since she ended up in my arms ). Of course, right now, you probably don't want a relationship. You probably want some time to relax and be single. That is healthy. In any case, I hope that you don't stay and enable his addiction. You need to be in a sane situation, not a crazy one. Good for your family, looking out for you.

I'd suggest that your ex and my gf's ex get together, but for a couple of things: he's not gay, he's a messy person, I'm not a matchmaker, and your bf needs some time apart to get a grip on himself. Plus, Gene is a rabid Pentecostal fundamentalist, which can be annoying. He's not an open-minded Christian like EL or Sarah. So, that classic joke would fall flat.

Anyway, for your own sake, get out as soon as you can. You deserve someone better than that. Someone who won't consider booze a higher priority than everything else in life, including you. My maternal grandfather was an alcoholic, and it was hell on my mother and grandmother. You don't deserve to suffer like that.

 

[SensualCealy]

Carson,
I agree with everyone that says to wait until the minute you leave or better yet, if he works, do it while he is at work and leave that lengthy letter you are going to write for him to read when you arent there!

YOU OWE HIM NOTHING!!! He hasnt got the guts to offer you anything, and you werent asking for much, so why would you have to explain yourself- pretty evident to me why you are leaving and sooner or later he will figure it out for himself.

I like the idea of taking stuff to the drop off, pack your clothes you need in the bottom of the boxes and put the 'rubbish' on top. Borrow a friends trunk to hid your stuff away unti the get away happens (this will cost nothing!).
If they are your nice/ good clothes, maybe they are a little too big or too small and you are handing them off to the second hand store . I doubt he will be sober enough to figure this out on his own.

If you have big items, TV, Bed etc, make sure you have lots of friends to help move the furniture to make it even faster. Then swear your friends to secrecy that they will NEVER tell where you are.

Just make sure if you have any billing accounts that are joint that you sign off of them or they will likely give out your return address.

Lots of Luck and Love,
PM me anytime handsome!
C

 

[simply_cyn]

Gee, thanks!

As far as the packing issue, I've moved so many times in my life that I don't have a lot of stuff and I don't ever really unpack. I could pack all this shit in a couple of hours, and if I had to leave anything behind I'd be fine (except my dogs. They're coming with me.)

All you really need in life, you already have:
1) a supportive family
2) good friends to lean on
3) faithful dogs that will never let you down, and ...
4) a pair of Crocs that will lead you in the right direction

Good luck carson ... don't ever look back but keep walking that path that allows you to keep your chin up, your back straight and your heart happy. Anything that takes one of those things away, isn't worth it.

I'm thinking about you.

 

[carsonshepherd]

YAY!!!

I will always be grateful. You've done a good thing.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Carson,
I agree with everyone that says to wait until the minute you leave or better yet, if he works, do it while he is at work and leave that lengthy letter you are going to write for him to read when you arent there!

YOU OWE HIM NOTHING!!! He hasnt got the guts to offer you anything, and you werent asking for much, so why would you have to explain yourself- pretty evident to me why you are leaving and sooner or later he will figure it out for himself.

I like the idea of taking stuff to the drop off, pack your clothes you need in the bottom of the boxes and put the 'rubbish' on top. Borrow a friends trunk to hid your stuff away unti the get away happens (this will cost nothing!).
If they are your nice/ good clothes, maybe they are a little too big or too small and you are handing them off to the second hand store . I doubt he will be sober enough to figure this out on his own.

If you have big items, TV, Bed etc, make sure you have lots of friends to help move the furniture to make it even faster. Then swear your friends to secrecy that they will NEVER tell where you are.

Just make sure if you have any billing accounts that are joint that you sign off of them or they will likely give out your return address.

Lots of Luck and Love,
PM me anytime handsome!
C

I think he knows. In fact, while he was drunk tonight, he told me to get out. (Of course then he swore he didn't mean it.) He's going to get his wish.

 

[minsue]

I think he knows. In fact, while he was drunk tonight, he told me to get out. (Of course then he swore he didn't mean it.) He's going to get his wish.

 

[ElizabethWest]

Adios Mother Fucker.

I've set a date for my departure from this relationship and this city. Rather, my mom and my brother set a date. I asked them to help me because I seem to have lost my ability to make decisions and take action. So basically, my brother and his friend are going to show up here in a few weeks grab me, my dogs and my stuff, throw it into a U-Haul and drive off.

I've gone back and forth on leaving for so long. I wanted to give my BF a chance to deal with his alcohol problem, but I can't keep giving him chance after chance. I know I need to go but it was always "not now." Well, now it's NOW. My mom's not gonna let me back out.

I've got a few weeks to plan, so I'm worried about how I'll tell him. Will I tell him ahead of time so we can work things out like adults? Or should I spring it on him? I don't want to spring it on him - I don't want to leave while he's at work. I wish we could part amicably but I don't know if that's possible. The last time I had to do this, I had to just walk away without a thing and never look back. I'm prepared to do that if I have to, but I don't want to do it. Basically, I'm really confused and panicky and I'm not sure how to go about any of this.

Be well, my friend. Think of yourself first and remember that you have friends that care for and love you more than you know.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Be well, my friend. Think of yourself first and remember that you have friends that care for and love you more than you know.

thanks. now the hard part is waiting... but one of my friends here offered me a place to stay if I need to take a runner, so that makes me feel better, at least.

 

[ElizabethWest]

thanks. now the hard part is waiting... but one of my friends here offered me a place to stay if I need to take a runner, so that makes me feel better, at least.

Good idea. Always have a backup plan.

Remember that I live on a dog-friendly acre in the country if you need help there.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Good idea. Always have a backup plan.

Remember that I live on a dog-friendly acre in the country if you need help there.

Thanks... at this point I am embracing every option

 

[minsue]

Thanks... at this point I am embracing every option

There's a house in the desert that's always open to you, too.

 

[carsonshepherd]

There's a house in the desert that's always open to you, too.

Yeah, I hear it's a dry heat

 

[minsue]

Yeah, I hear it's a dry heat

That's what they tell us.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I will always be grateful. You've done a good thing.

Hey you're like the little brother I never had........to pick on.