ABSnapped! Ransom thread

[Nirvanadragones]

ABS-LOVERS, STALKERS AND LURKERS OF THE AH​

Listen carefully! We have your ABSTRUSE in our posession. She is safe and unharmed and if you want her back, you must pay a queen's ransom for her. We're wide open to what that could be - the more, the naughtier, the better. Lapdances are optional. Chocolate is essential. Bring your own alcohol.

The two people watching over her do not particularly like you so we advise you not to provoke them. Speaking to anyone about your situation, such as Police, F.B.I., anyone on the General board or GLBT etc., will result in your AV being beheaded. If we catch you talking to a stray dog, she gets hurt. If you alert bank authorities, she will hurt more. If the ransom is in any way marked or tampered with, we will force her to giggle. You will be scanned for electronic devices and if any are found, she will wear pink.

For the remainder of this, Abs will remain in this thread. And that is final.
THIS IS NOT A COLLABORATION, IT IS A CONSPIRACY...
I repeat: (read above)

Yours sincerely
Vana & The Damp one

 

[Recidiva]

*glare*

 

[Nirvanadragones]

*glare*

I'm sorry... is there a problem? Did you bring chocolate?

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Hey!!! WTF???

 

[Salvor-Hardon]

Hmmmm for Abs...... to Vana and dampy......... well dang, in that scenario I'll through in full body massages.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Hey!!! WTF???

Sit down and shut up

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Sit down and shut up

Are you talking to me???

 

[the captians wench]

I offer up a chocolate covered lapdance. You may lick anything that gets jiggled in your face.

anything for Abs

 

[damppanties]

Are you talking to me???

AT you.

 

[Recidiva]

I'm sorry... is there a problem? Did you bring chocolate?

Yes. There is a problem. Anyone taking my ABS away by force, and who does not like me, and furthermore didn't even INVITE me to have a vote, doesn't get chocolate. No chocolate. Ever.

This is serious stuff. *more glaring*

 

[Recidiva]

Are you talking to me???

You can sit by me. I have chocolate. Only not for them.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

AT you.

Excuse me????

My friends will come and save me.....I think.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Excuse me????

My friends will come and save me.....I think.

We are your friends...

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Excuse me????

My friends will come and save me.....I think.

I'll swing by on the bike. Haul ass, I'm only gonna slow down. Oh, and when we get to Mexico, you're buying tequila.

 

[Recidiva]

Excuse me????

My friends will come and save me.....I think.

Carol Anne, don't go into the light!

*dangles cheese*

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Hmmmm for Abs...... to Vana and dampy......... well dang, in that scenario I'll through in full body massages.

bring it on.... where do you start. I'm achy

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Are you talking to me???

No. The bitch.

Oh yes, that's you, isnt it.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

We are your friends...

that's comforting.

I'm eating chocolate with the Diva and the Wench.

Do you think a mere thread can hold me??

 

[Recidiva]

that's comforting.

I'm eating chocolate with the Diva and the Wench.

Do you think a mere thread can hold me??

Okay, she hasn't been brainwashed. I feel so much better.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

I offer up a chocolate covered lapdance. You may lick anything that gets jiggled in your face.

anything for Abs

is that it??? I was under the impression she is IMPORTANT...

 

[Salvor-Hardon]

bring it on.... where do you start. I'm achy

Start at the shoulder / neck/ temples and work down from there.


you want with or without reiki stones?

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I'll swing by on the bike. Haul ass, I'm only gonna slow down. Oh, and when we get to Mexico, you're buying tequila.

I knew you would come through for me!!!

Ha!, little do they know....I have low friends in high places.....okay,just a crazy Texan.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Okay, she hasn't been brainwashed. I feel so much better.

coffee spew.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

You can sit by me. I have chocolate. Only not for them.

If you give her chocolate, you will regret it.

 

[Recidiva]

is that it??? I was under the impression she is IMPORTANT...

Well, you said you didn't like me particularly much. So fuck off! Nyeah!