AAAGH -- Final Fifty Shades book to be released!

[KeithD]

SOME of us only write here as a sideline. They might have thriving, profitable careers on Amazon and elsewhere while simultaneously turning out nonfiction. Some of us don't have to wave our dicks.

Ah, great. Gay bashing. Who would have guessed you would go there?

That initial ego-declaring post about how great an author you are in unindexed real life wasn't dick waving?

Have you checked out my habu and Dirk Hessian Amazon portfolios?

I'd suggest you just stop this while you were falling so far behind, but this is sort of fun.

Discovered what the number 7 represents yet?

 

[Bramblethorn]

It's not impotent at all. We bother because writing stories gives people pleasure. That's enough. That's sufficient justification. It gives me pleasure to write, too. The upside is clear and obvious. The downside is pure conjecture.

There are live people in this thread who experience the downside, the displeasure that comes from badly-written rep, and have been telling you about it. This is only "conjecture" if you believe people at the other end of the internet don't exist.

(other than the ones who send positive feedback, those people are real!)

 

[KeithD]

From a guy who used to brag about having been a professional spy, I'll take that as a compliment.

Yes, I was a professional spy. Other people, like you, bring that up when they want to be nasty, since it doesn't have particular significance to writing here or to this thread, or to much of anything I assert in initial postings (please cite where I have if you want to continue with your nastiness on this), but, gee I don't post about it. It, however, is true and I see no reason to pretend I haven't done what I've done in life to satisfy your limited horizons. And I do get amused when I know that I've done stuff that others won't believe I've done. Your bringing this irrelevancy in to be nasty doesn't bother me. It certain says something about you, though.

You are ticked at me because of what I post about clubbers trying to control what can be posted here to the BDSM category, so you decide to attack me on totally irrelevant points instead. Aren't you special?

 

[Wifetheif]

Ah, great. Gay bashing. Who would have guessed you would go there?

That initial ego-declaring post about how great an author you are in unindexed real life wasn't dick waving?

Have you checked out my habu and Dirk Hessian Amazon portfolios?

I'd suggest you just stop this while you were falling so far behind, but this is sort of fun.

Discovered what the number 7 represents yet?

I have just as many books as you published on Amazon and I have the genre pretty much to myself.
Because I have a female persona to protect on Amazon I will not divulge my pen name. suffice to say that I am the queen of "Shrink fiction" and my ratings are every bit the equal of yours. Happy hunting!

 

[KeithD]

I have just as many books as you published on Amazon and I have the genre pretty much to myself.
Because I have a female persona to protect on Amazon I will not divulge my pen name. suffice to say that I am the queen of "Shrink fiction" and my ratings are every bit the equal of yours. Happy hunting!

I have a couple of female persona pen names on Amazon too (and on Literotica, as well), but who other than you is so insecure that they see the need to keep trying to push unverifiable comparison claims--in addition to suggestion that I'm not a good writer without having ever read anything I've written? Believe me, I've encountered people like you before. You go guy! Rah, rah.

Did I mention insecure and childish?

Did you plan to get around to attacking me on something I've actually posted? That doesn't include E.L. James's writing ability. I never posted I thought her writing was good--or better than yours. I've never read anything she wrote and I have no intention of ever reading anything you've written. I did post that she opened up a genre that let other BDSM writers ride in on her coattails--and that's just the truth.

 

[litfan10]

I did post that she opened up a genre that let other BDSM writers ride in on her coattails--and that's just the truth.

Or do you mean cattails...

I figured we needed a little levity in this train wreck.

 

[KeithD]

Or do you mean cattails...

I figured we needed a little levity in this train wreck.

Not having read any of the 50 Shades stuff, I don't know what E.L. James did with cattails to send gullible readers to the hospital, but I can imagine that may not meet club rules.

 

[litfan10]

Not having read any of the 50 Shades stuff, I don't know what E.L. James did with cattails to send gullible readers to the hospital, but I can imagine that may not meet club rules.

The voice in my head is chanting "You'll put your eye out."

Which then leads me to shock at how my mother was right to say "You'll go blind if you do that!"

 

[Wifetheif]

I have a couple of female persona pen names on Amazon too (and on Literotica, as well), but who other than you is so insecure that they see the need to keep trying to push unverifiable comparison claims--in addition to suggestion that I'm not a good writer without having ever read anything I've written? Believe me, I've encountered people like you before. You go guy! Rah, rah.

Did I mention insecure and childish?

Did you plan to get around to attacking me on something I've actually posted? That doesn't include E.L. James's writing ability. I never posted I thought her writing was good--or better than yours. I've never read anything she wrote and I have no intention of ever reading anything you've written. I did post that she opened up a genre that let other BDSM writers ride in on her coattails--and that's just the truth.

As I and others have pointed out -- that claim is not necessarily true. There were famous best-selling erotica writers before, after, and during her "reign" She has NOT inspired copycats as no one writes prose like her (thank heavens) and all have far more mature characters. Who tries to seriously sell a twenty-rwo-year-old virgin who doesn't know what an e-mail is? If you can point me to writers aping THAT schtick I'll agree with you. I've edited books for another best-selling erotica author who writes MPreg fiction. That certainly is NOT riding on E.L.Jame's coattails! And I assure you just about every one of us on this board would envy her sales. The only way in which she is similar to E.L. James is that she is a very poor prose stylist. She found her niche though, and I admire that.
YOU write BDSM -- serious question, why have you never read any part of the "Fifty Shades" series?. can't ALL writers learn things from the best-sellers, even if that lesson is how NOT to write a book?

 

[Bramblethorn]

Yes, I was a professional spy. Other people, like you, bring that up when they want to be nasty, since it doesn't have particular significance to writing here or to this thread, or to much of anything I assert in initial postings (please cite where I have if you want to continue with your nastiness on this), but, gee I don't post about it. It, however, is true and I see no reason to pretend I haven't done what I've done in life to satisfy your limited horizons. And I do get amused when I know that I've done stuff that others won't believe I've done.

You're getting very defensive here about something I didn't actually say. At no point in this discussion did I challenge the truthfulness of your claims about being a spy, so I'm not sure why you're launching into this tangent about whether it's true.

I was merely pointing out the incongruity of somebody who claims to have been a professional spy complaining about somebody else being "nosy". I'm sure you've seen and done worse than... *checks notes* pointing out the hypocrisy of misspelling your name while flaming somebody else for misspelling theirs.

Your bringing this irrelevancy in to be nasty doesn't bother me. It certain [sic] says something about you, though.

Uh huh. Whereas sniping at Wifetheif about the spelling of his name definitely, definitely wasn't "bringing in irrelevancy to be nasty". Gotcha.

We've been over this before. I'm happy to ignore your existence and your spelling mistakes for as long as you can refrain from being a dick to other posters. But if you're going to be a jerk - and especially a hypocritical jerk - you can expect to be called on it.

 

[KeithD]

It was E.L. James's books that were covering shelves in drugstores and Wal-Marts--I first encountered them plastering a whole wall in an airport terminal bookstore in Birmingham, England. It was E.L. James's books everyone was talking about. It was her books being mentioned in TV sit coms and movies (e.g., "Book Club"). You can have your sour grapes. The fact is that E.L. James established the genre in the marketplace for others to follow and ride her coattails (or cattails, apparently) And it's her trail blazing and profit taking from the genre that amateur BDSM writers are rabidly jealous of.

And, with that, you're done (having avoided responding to most of what I posted you read what I posted--I've twice declared I haven't read any part of 50 Shades).

 

[KeithD]

You're getting very defensive here about something I didn't actually say. At no point in this discussion did I challenge the truthfulness of your claims about being a spy, so I'm not sure why you're launching into this tangent about whether it's true.

Well, sure, you're such a sweetie that butter wouldn't melt in your mouth.

I don't know who you think you're fooling. But I don't really care, either.

 

[Wifetheif]

It was E.L. James's books that were covering shelves in drugstores and Wal-Marts--I first encountered them plastering a whole wall in an airport terminal bookstore in Birmingham, England. It was E.L. James's books everyone was talking about. It was her books being mentioned in TV sit coms and movies (e.g., "Book Club"). You can have your sour grapes. The fact is that E.L. James established the genre in the marketplace for others to follow and ride her coattails (or cattails, apparently) And it's her trail blazing and profit taking from the genre that amateur BDSM writers are rabidly jealous of.

And, with that, you're done (having avoided responding to most of what I posted you read what I posted--I've twice declared I haven't read any part of 50 Shades).

So, you saw walls of her book at an airport. Heard it mentioned everywhere and you NEVER so much as peeked behind the covers to see what all the fuss was about? I find that VERY hard to believe. Sure, in 1976 I could believe that you never watched "Jaws" or read the book nut through simple osmosis you would know what the film was about and something of the story. So we are to believe that a man who was once a spy and is now an erotica author is so INCURIOUS that he would NOT investigate the hub-huh all about him? I hope my taxes never paid your salary! If I was on the lam from you all I would have had to done id duck behind the "Fifty Shades" display at my local Wal-Mart Congratulations, my man, you are the only erotica writer in the world who has NO idea qhat "Fifty Shades" is about! The only one out of BILLIONS who never read so much as a paragraph on the web! Incredible! I can now safely tell the Chi coms where to hide the government plans when they are skulking around your neighborhood!

 

[litfan10]

nope...changed my mind. I don't want to fan any fires

 

[KeithD]

nope...changed my mind. I don't want to fan any fires

Probably a good idea. It's fizzled down to total irrelevancy and juvenile silliness.

 

[ElectricBlue]

So, you saw walls of her book at an airport. Heard it mentioned everywhere and you NEVER so much as peeked behind the covers to see what all the fuss was about? I find that VERY hard to believe.

Believe it, sunshine. Here's another person with many decades of voracious reading habits who has not had the slightest curiosity about Shades of Grey. I've not read a single word. Also, I've not watched a single episode of Twilight, which I gather is what it is "based" on. We're not all lemmings, just saying.

 

[jaF0]

Find me ONE author on Literotica.com that has written an equally bad sentence.

I can safely say that virtually ALL L.Com authors have "better chops" than that!

I'm absolutely certain you've never read my stuff.

You've NEVER read any to it? UTTER B.S.

I'm absolutely certain I've never read their stuff.

 

[jaF0]

Or do you mean cattails...

That would be one of the petgirl storiss, no?

 

[jaF0]

So, you saw walls of her book at an airport.

I haven't been in an airport in over 20 years.

Believe it, sunshine. Here's another person with many decades of voracious reading habits who has not had the slightest curiosity about Shades of Grey. I've not read a single word. Also, I've not watched a single episode of Twilight, which I gather is what it is "based" on. We're not all lemmings, just saying.

Me neither. Nor that zombie thing.

 

[Wifetheif]

Believe it, sunshine. Here's another person with many decades of voracious reading habits who has not had the slightest curiosity about Shades of Grey. I've not read a single word. Also, I've not watched a single episode of Twilight, which I gather is what it is "based" on. We're not all lemmings, just saying.

-- I've never read the entire book. As I said, to me it is physically painful to read. I know what the books are about through cultural osmosis and reading book reviews. I'm not one of those who lack the courage to NOT try new things. With all her success, I figured I might learn a thing or two. I didn't learn anything other than to NEVER pick up another E.L. James book. I've had that same experience with Dan Brown and other so-called "event" books
!
You lie when you say you never read a single word -- the title is four words long

 

[jaF0]

I didn't learn anything other than to NEVER pick up another E.L. James book. I've had that same experience with Dan Brown and other so-called "event" books

I feel the same about Stephen King.

 

[RejectReality]

I feel the same about Stephen King.

Same. There's something about his writing that doesn't connect with me. I've never successfully made it more than a chapter or two into anything, and haven't cracked one in probably 30 years.

 

[Wifetheif]

If you have nothing nice to say...

Despite all the bad writing, all the bad examples, all the bad psychology, these books made many people feel good. It seems like, despite all the flaws, one way or another, it still managed to hit the right chord for a lot of people.

What do you do? You look down on a lot of people who don't share your negativity. You only seem to focus on the negative things of others, while trying to convince us of your own greatness. Got some issues?

Well, al of this started when someone who has never read a single word of the book and therefore has NO idea what they are defending claiming that E.L. James "has the chops." Yes, she has tremendous sales BUT even the biggest fans of the book agree that the writing is terrible. In that sense, I was DEFENDING most or nearly ALL L.iterotica.com writers as having better chops than her.
Then the silliness began, my personhood was insulted but that is not surprising since shouting seems to be the norm on forums.

 

[KeithD]

"Has the chops" means she took a bundle to the bank and became the household name for the genre.

 

[MsNatalie99]

"Has the chops" means she took a bundle to the bank and became the household name for the genre.

Sales isn't everything. I will not bash E.L. James, but the story was poorly written and created a lot of misconceptions in the community. That being said, the story was/is successful in finding it's audience.