Cock Talk

[aussiegeekygal]

This is the kind of clarity I think would have improved my dating life immeasurably.

It helps everyone out

 

[hotwords229_A]

It helps everyone out

It really does.

 

[deft]

It helps everyone out

Absolutely! What a timesaver!

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Is this the big vag energy that dude was talking about?

Oh, and did I tell y'all he fucking BLOCKED ME?

It actually impressed me in a way, but those were some balls he slapped in my face.

 

[hotwords229_A]

That’s crazy! Who would block you?!

but those were some balls he slapped in my face.

Just when I started to lose my erection you had to say this!

 

[SassySheDevil]

Of course we do! You've just got to leave them long enough for sassy to see

Oohhh thank you Aussie. I'm so grateful I decided to look one more time!

.... should have kept my mouth shut.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Oh my gosh, so...
I met a guy online. There was chemistry and we hooked up. I messaged him the next day and he blocked me

If I didn't have better self esteem, dating would destroy me.

In this case I was actually kind of impressed. It was a dick move and took balls on his end. It's possible I spooked him because we were both involved in something very big and very particular here that was unexpected. Our circles certainly overlap and I think there were things he probably wasn't completely forthcoming about.

But I guess I'll never know?

Sucks, too. He could have been an exceptional fuck buddy

 

[deft]

Oh my gosh, so...
I met a guy online. There was chemistry and we hooked up. I messaged him the next day and he blocked me

If I didn't have better self esteem, dating would destroy me.

In this case I was actually kind of impressed. It was a dick move and took balls on his end. It's possible I spooked him because we were both involved in something very big and very particular here that was unexpected. Our circles certainly overlap and I think there were things he probably wasn't completely forthcoming about.

But I guess I'll never know?

Sucks, too. He could have been an exceptional fuck buddy

He has missed right the fuck out.

 

[Photog1rl]

Oh my gosh, so...
I met a guy online. There was chemistry and we hooked up. I messaged him the next day and he blocked me

If I didn't have better self esteem, dating would destroy me.

In this case I was actually kind of impressed. It was a dick move and took balls on his end. It's possible I spooked him because we were both involved in something very big and very particular here that was unexpected. Our circles certainly overlap and I think there were things he probably wasn't completely forthcoming about.

But I guess I'll never know?

Sucks, too. He could have been an exceptional fuck buddy

You seem to be taking it in stride. That is fantastic!

 

[LadyLascivious1]

*thuds*

(I can't help it, I'm a curious sniffer)

Now this needs to be a T-shirt!

 

[Photog1rl]

OK... I took this for a thread about semi-hard cocks, but my balls make a cameo...

https://www.***********/scl/fi/udem...ey=rc3t1zdp6zmu671pgm04psals&st=pj1txn0c&dl=0

You are so very wonderful @deft i just adore when you share.

 

[deft]

You are so very wonderful @deft i just adore when you share.

So… blushing! thank you PG! You’re so kind!

 

[Lmizzler]

Second best answer ever

Now I’m curious what the number one response would have been.

 

[hotcpu]

Oh my gosh, so...
I met a guy online. There was chemistry and we hooked up. I messaged him the next day and he blocked me

If I didn't have better self esteem, dating would destroy me.

In this case I was actually kind of impressed. It was a dick move and took balls on his end. It's possible I spooked him because we were both involved in something very big and very particular here that was unexpected. Our circles certainly overlap and I think there were things he probably wasn't completely forthcoming about.

But I guess I'll never know?

Sucks, too. He could have been an exceptional fuck buddy

He's Nominated and Wins IDIOT OF THE YEAR AWARD ...

 

[Apisto42]

I’ll post mine when @Apisto42 posts his, how about that?

(I’m really counting on him not posting his nuts).

Dude, that’s an unsafe bet.

I bet if I ask nicely he will

How nicely we talking?

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Dude, that’s an unsafe bet.

How nicely we talking?

Oh, I can be very nice when I want something

 

[hotwords229_A]

Why does your pillow smell funny?

https://64.media.tumblr.com/deea8c7bf545900c1c9ccab1fc0447fc/tumblr_necprmtoJw1r2iywxo8_400.gif

Let’s get back to basics:

How often do you change your sheets?
If women had never been invented, do you think guys would ever wash their sheets? Would sheets exist? Would beds? If you answered yes to any of these do you feel as ridiculous as you look?
What do you wear to bed (on an average “sleep only” night)?
Have you ever fucked your pillow?
Do you sleep in your socks?
Do you sleep with animals (and I don’t mean in a perverted way)?
Do you have extraneous pillows or blankets on your bed that have no purpose but decorative?
Do you keep sex toys in a drawer next to your bed, or hidden somewhere else?
Do you hog the blankets?
Do you shower/bathe before bed or sleep in your own filth?
Do you take both shoes off and then both socks, or one shoe and one sock at a time like a psychopath?
Curtains open or closed?
Do you change in front of a window with the possibility of peeping neighbors, or do you change like a ninja with no possibility of being seen?
Do you leave your clothes nearby in case of emergency, or are you going into battle in your Underoos?
Do you have some form of self defense weapon near your bed?
It’s a warm night, are your feet out of the covers or in?
When you wake up, are your blankets/sheets in perfect order or does it look like a rhinoceros tried to kick his heroin habit overnight in your bed?
What did I miss?

 

[Wand3rlust]

That is a LOT of fucking questions.

 

[Bry1313]

Why does your pillow smell funny?

https://64.media.tumblr.com/deea8c7bf545900c1c9ccab1fc0447fc/tumblr_necprmtoJw1r2iywxo8_400.gif

Let’s get back to basics:

How often do you change your sheets?
If women had never been invented, do you think guys would ever wash their sheets? Would sheets exist? Would beds? If you answered yes to any of these do you feel as ridiculous as you look?
What do you wear to bed (on an average “sleep only” night)?
Have you ever fucked your pillow?
Do you sleep in your socks?
Do you sleep with animals (and I don’t mean in a perverted way)?
Do you have extraneous pillows or blankets on your bed that have no purpose but decorative?
Do you keep sex toys in a drawer next to your bed, or hidden somewhere else?
Do you hog the blankets?
Do you shower/bathe before bed or sleep in your own filth?
Do you take both shoes off and then both socks, or one shoe and one sock at a time like a psychopath?
Curtains open or closed?
Do you change in front of a window with the possibility of peeping neighbors, or do you change like a ninja with no possibility of being seen?
Do you leave your clothes nearby in case of emergency, or are you going into battle in your Underoos?
Do you have some form of self defense weapon near your bed?
It’s a warm night, are your feet out of the covers or in?
When you wake up, are your blankets/sheets in perfect order or does it look like a rhinoceros tried to kick his heroin habit overnight in your bed?
What did I miss?

Too many questions buddy, time to hire an editor. The important question, it’s always clean sheet Sunday.

 

[hotwords229_A]

That is a LOT of fucking questions.

Too many questions buddy, time to hire an editor. The important question, it’s always clean sheet Sunday.

Yeah, this turned into a whole thing. I even thought of more questions after posting.

Always feel free to answer some, all, none or just make your own questions and answer them!
I didn’t realize I had this much interest in sheets.

 

[MindYaBitness]

Why does your pillow smell funny?

Has no one schooled you on demodex & dust mites? Sit right back & I'll tell a tale that'll keep you up at night....

Let’s get back to basics:

How often do you change your sheets?

Twice a week. My love of good hygiene & my irrational adoration for my baby dogs, is like an inescapable civil war in my brain. An armistice was reached when I started changing my sheets at least twice a week

What do you wear to bed (on an average “sleep only” night)?

Just a T-shirt & chonies, or a sweatshirt & jammy pants in the winter when I sleep with the windows cracked.

Have you ever fucked your pillow?

No, but apparently I'm in the minority.

Do you sleep in your socks?

I'll start with socks in the winter, but I always kick them off in the middle of the night, leaving a little pile of rolled up socks at the end of my bed every week

Do you sleep with animals (and I don’t mean in a perverted way)?

When my husband is out of town, yes. I just feel safer with them right next to me, though I know I'll be woken repeatedly to paws jammed into my back. Worth it.

Do you have extraneous pillows or blankets on your bed that have no purpose but decorative?

Yes, I've got three euro pillows that are large & decorative, but we do use them sometimes.

Do you keep sex toys in a drawer next to your bed, or hidden somewhere else?

The bulk of my preferred toys are in the night stand. The lesser used ones in my arsenal are in the closet

Do you hog the blankets?

yes and no. I sleep on my side and flip over to the other side often. I pull the blanket with me wherever I go. Usually not a problem, once in awhile he wakes up freezing

Do you shower/bathe before bed or sleep in your own filth?

usually I just do my night face potion routine. However, if I've been working in the garden, out playing in the river, or something else sweaty & dirty, I'll shower before bed

Do you take both shoes off and then both socks, or one shoe and one sock at a time like a psychopath?

I'm not a psychpath, apparently. Please, submit this rigorous diagnostic tool tool to the American Psychological Association. It could save so much time diagnosing!!!!

Curtains open or closed?

curtain open, blinds drawn, usually. But if open, I don't really care.

Do you change in front of a window with the possibility of peeping neighbors, or do you change like a ninja with no possibility of being seen?

I change wherever I am in my room. The way my home is situated it's unlikely anyone would see anyway, and if they did, I don't really care. I practice exhibitionism for lazy people

Do you leave your clothes nearby in case of emergency, or are you going into battle in your Underoos?

1-how dare you insult my Underoos is in this impertinent manner! I will have you know know that my Wonder Woman Underoos make me jump higher, run faster, and solve crimes better than any regular and/or sexy choices could!
2-Nah, a shirt & clean undies is enough to assuage any fear of first responders seeing me underdressed.

*as a former firefighter, I will say that if you sleep naked please keep a shirt or undies near by. Wrestling your sweaty naked body out of a second story windows is more difficult than getting a grip on a greased pig

Do you have some form of self defense weapon near your bed?

If my spouses snores & CPAP don't scare you off, I'm not sure the variety of firearms will.

It’s a warm night, are your feet out of the covers or in?

Once my toes are cold, I'm screwed. Toes are always in, leg bent & out of the covers.

When you wake up, are your blankets/sheets in perfect order or does it look like a rhinoceros tried to kick his heroin habit overnight in your bed?

I'd say the look is more that of a tribe of pigmys had performed a war dance

 

[SassySheDevil]

Who stole your Lit virginity?





When we came to Literotica, we were all sweet, innocent virgins. It even said so in our descriptions. Over time we became more comfortable with topics and the sharing of pics and experiences.

No. I had already found other sites to open my eyes.

What Literotica thread opened you up more than expected and really let the perv in you out to play?

I spent the first couple years mostly in the how-to section. So, I am sure it was probably one of those.

Chemo brain is real and makes me a scatterbrained person right now. So, I have forgotten a lot.

What Lister taught you some important (hopefully good) lesson about sex, online sex, or intimate relationship stuff that changed you?

I think the women actually taught me more. Women are so open with each other that it is easy to talk about stuff like this.
Plus they don't automatically offer you their dick with you answer questions.
How do you give a hand job? Women- you do this, and that and.... Man- Like this. I'll show you. turn on your web cam.

What have you learned, in general, about sex and relationships from your time here?

I can't say specifically. I can only say that I have. (just because I don't remember)

What is something that has caused more confusion in you from your time on Lit?

I don't understand why so many guys are chasing anything that breathes and how they think that looks attractive. Women. Mostly women anyway. How they cannot see the groups and cliques. It is almost always the ones in them who deny they exist.

What sexual desire were you unaware of before coming here?

Submissive acts.

What is something you thought you would never do that you have done on Lit?

Post a full nude.

Are you more guarded or less guarded (sexually) since your time on Lit?

Both. It is a rollercoaster. I let it down. Get fucked over, then put it back up.

Do you remember your first real interaction on Lit? Tell us:

They were mostly in AMpics and it was such a good time. There was less jealousy. The women supported each other more. But it finally felt like I had found my place.

What would you most like to know or ask that I didn’t think of in these questions?

You did good.

 

[Apisto42]

Why does your pillow smell funny?



Let’s get back to basics:

Dude. Basic is like one question. Are you really bored?

How often do you change your sheets?

When my wife tells me to.

If women had never been invented, do you think guys would ever wash their sheets?

Annually

Would sheets exist? Would beds?

Yes. Cause I’ve spent a lot of time in my youth not sleeping in a bed and it sucks.

If you answered yes to any of these do you feel as ridiculous as you look?

Always.

What do you wear to bed (on an average “sleep only” night)?

Boxer briefs

Have you ever fucked your pillow?

Wtf?

Do you sleep in your socks?

When it’s really cold

Do you sleep with animals (and I don’t mean in a perverted way)?

When he feels like it. Sometimes he decides to sleep in his own bed.

Do you have extraneous pillows or blankets on your bed that have no purpose but decorative?

I keep hiding the extra pillows. She’s given up.

Do you keep sex toys in a drawer next to your bed, or hidden somewhere else?

Nope

Do you hog the blankets?

Yes

Do you shower/bathe before bed or sleep in your own filth?

Yes

Do you take both shoes off and then both socks, or one shoe and one sock at a time like a psychopath?

Wtf? Shoes come off as soon as I get home.

Curtains open or closed?

Blinds down at night

Do you change in front of a window with the possibility of peeping neighbors, or do you change like a ninja with no possibility of being seen?

If they’re creeping around out in the country, they get to see it all.

Do you leave your clothes nearby in case of emergency, or are you going into battle in your Underoos?

I can shoot with or without pants.

Do you have some form of self defense weapon near your bed?

.38 special

It’s a warm night, are your feet out of the covers or in?

Almost always out.

When you wake up, are your blankets/sheets in perfect order or does it look like a rhinoceros tried to kick his heroin habit overnight in your bed?

Nah, I always keep my rhino pacified.

What did I miss?

Summer solstice?

 

[hotwords229_A]

Dude. Basic is like one question. Are you really bored?

What you guys fail to realize is that this is one question to me. One long run-on question.
Each question becomes three more as I’m asking it.

 

[Apisto42]

What you guys fail to realize is that this is one question to me. One long run-on question.
Each question becomes three more as I’m asking it.

Probably why I like you. Inquisitive people are fun.

But still. Jus’ say’n.