Sex & Shenanigans

[OrdinaryPerson]

You spelled 'adorable' wrong.

You Americans and your funny spelling...

No; we have the correct spelling.
I already know you're constantly adorable

 

[LupineOne]

Oh good! For a second I thought you had Korbel on ice...

Fuck no

 

[Wand3rlust]

Because they're BFFs with Britain, and Britain secetly always wanted to be French, but then they got all mad because the French helped the Colonist defeat Mad King Georgie. Then, they weren't chill for awhile, until the whole "support folks who don't like monarchs" thing backfired on the Frenchies. Now, like, they're talking again, but Britain keeps some of their spelling as a weird flex.

*this has been Mean Girl history w/professor O'Bitties

Why are you like this?

 

[__Nathan1968]

Who hurt you.

You. Just now.

 

[MindYaBitness]

Why are you like this?

I took waaaay to much history & linguistics in college. I'm still paying students loans on the 2nd education I don't use. I might as well dump my worthless, scewed knowledge somwhere

 

[jason28053]

Is this really the first time someone called you difficult?

She’s not difficult @Wand3rlust is the voice for my Siri

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

It's A Small World After All ride at Disneyland.

No way! Like I’ve stroked a cock on the dark parts of Pirates of the Caribbean many times, but no way is Small World dark or empty enough for full-on sex. Not even a rainy weekday morning in the middle of the school year. Not even late at night when all the kiddos are in bed

Umm, church... I gave my bf a blowie in an empty room during church.

I defiled a few rooms myself

LOL this came up in convo with @Btq97 recently. Problem is, neither of us actually attend church, so we’d literally be going there just to defile it. We’re going to need a bigger handbasket!

I've woken up to sex. Not sure if that counts... But, I've never been in a relationship long enough to have random sex like what I think you are asking about.

Ooo that’s one of my favorites

That dreamy in between sleep/awake sex is amazing!

Wake up sex is awesome. You are both rested, comfortable together, energized. Waiting for them to open their eyes. Intimate, in a way "hot, jumping into bed at night" rarely is.

I love that.

Wake-up sex is the best! It falls under 1 of only 3 acceptable reasons for waking me up, but really makes mornings sooooo much better He knows he’ll have blanket consent to wake me up with it, as will I!

 

[vagrantx]

No; we have the correct spelling.

Directors at Daimler Benz and Chrysler have announced an agreement to adopt English as the preferred language for communications, rather than German, which was another possibility.

As part of the negotiations, directors at Chrysler conceded that English spelling has some room for improvement and have accepted a five-year phase-in plan. In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft"c". Also, the hard "c" will be replased with "k". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but komputers have one less letter.

There will be growing kompany enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replased by "f". This will make words like"fotograf" 20 persent shorter.

In the third year, Daimler Khrysler akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible.

Daimler Khrysler will enkourage the removal of double letters, whish have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horiblemes of silent "e"'s in the languag is disgrasful, and they would go.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps sush as replasing "th"with "z" and "w" by "v".

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be droped from vords kontaining"o", and similar shanges vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be nomor trubls or difikultis, and employes vil find it ezi to kommunikat vizeash ozer.

Ov kors al supliers vil be expekted to us zis for all busines komunikation via Daimler Khrysler.

Ze drem vil finali kum tru.

 

[jason28053]

Because they're BFFs with Britain, and Britain secetly always wanted to be French, but then they got all mad because the French helped the Colonist defeat Mad King Georgie. Then, they weren't chill for awhile, until the whole "support folks who don't like monarchs" thing backfired on the Frenchies. Now, like, they're talking again, but Britain keeps some of their spelling as a weird flex.

*this has been Mean Girl history w/professor O'Bitties

Yep, if you notice the cities that had a large British population in the states such as Boston and Charleston still retained some of the British colloquialisms.

 

[UnquietDreams]

No way! Like I’ve stroked a cock on the dark parts of Pirates of the Caribbean many times, but no way is Small World dark or empty enough for full-on sex. Not even a rainy weekday morning in the middle of the school year. Not even late at night when all the kiddos are in bed

I was 86 from Disneyland for it. Totally worth it. And I did not start it, for the record.

 

[jason28053]

Umm, church... I gave my bf a blowie in an empty room during church.

A Church worth attending for sure

 

[HeavyBalls]

Only problem with that joke…

Canadians are never angry.

Call one of us an American...

 

[crazychemgirl]

Call one of us an American...

Ok yeah… I fucking hate that.

 

[curious_me]

Because they're BFFs with Britain, and Britain secetly always wanted to be French, but then they got all mad because the French helped the Colonist defeat Mad King Georgie. Then, they weren't chill for awhile, until the whole "support folks who don't like monarchs" thing backfired on the Frenchies. Now, like, they're talking again, but Britain keeps some of their spelling as a weird flex.

*this has been Mean Girl history w/professor O'Bitties

I'd probably remember most of the shit I learned in school if they were broken down like this.

 

[Kitty_so_frisky]

You can't have intimate sex at night? Wut?

Oh, you can! But I find morning sex more so, or at least it is easier for me to get into that space.

You can, but morning & mid day are my favorite. I'm exhausted at bed time and it isn't as fun. However, wake me up slowly in the middle of the night & it's on!

I’m down for morning and bedtime … mid-day sex isn’t my thing. Unless it’s outdoors and it’s a sexy adventure.

I reject this premise entirely! There is no time of day that is inherently bad for sex

 

[HeavyBalls]

Ok yeah… I fucking hate that.

The response when someone calls the Beast an American....

https://media1.tenor.com/images/ebc08f089891fbf3d724ae97a194905f/tenor.gif?itemid=13467688

 

[jason28053]

Directors at Daimler Benz and Chrysler have announced an agreement to adopt English as the preferred language for communications, rather than German, which was another possibility.

As part of the negotiations, directors at Chrysler conceded that English spelling has some room for improvement and have accepted a five-year phase-in plan. In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft"c". Also, the hard "c" will be replased with "k". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but komputers have one less letter.

There will be growing kompany enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replased by "f". This will make words like"fotograf" 20 persent shorter.

In the third year, Daimler Khrysler akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible.

Daimler Khrysler will enkourage the removal of double letters, whish have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horiblemes of silent "e"'s in the languag is disgrasful, and they would go.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps sush as replasing "th"with "z" and "w" by "v".

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be droped from vords kontaining"o", and similar shanges vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be nomor trubls or difikultis, and employes vil find it ezi to kommunikat vizeash ozer.

Ov kors al supliers vil be expekted to us zis for all busines komunikation via Daimler Khrysler.

Ze drem vil finali kum tru.

How long did it take to type all this?

 

[lavendersilk]

No way! Like I’ve stroked a cock on the dark parts of Pirates of the Caribbean many times, but no way is Small World dark or empty enough for full-on sex. Not even a rainy weekday morning in the middle of the school year. Not even late at night when all the kiddos are in bed

Omg, I am dying...

 

[vagrantx]

How long did it take to type all this?

Lol that text predates the internet. So about a minute to find it then copy paste it

 

[crazychemgirl]

Lol that text predates the internet. So about a minute to find it then copy paste it

I LOVE early internet or pre-internet random shit like this.

 

[HeavyBalls]

No way! Like I’ve stroked a cock on the dark parts of Pirates of the Caribbean many times, but no way is Small World dark or empty enough for full-on sex. Not even a rainy weekday morning in the middle of the school year. Not even late at night when all the kiddos are in bed

Pervy Disney (where this is allowed) should totally be a thing...

 

[__Nathan1968]

Yep, if you notice the cities that had a large British population in the states such as Boston and Charleston still retained some of the British colloquialisms.

For the record, we Bostonians dumped the English colloquialisms into the harbor with the tea.

 

[jason28053]

Lol that text predates the internet. So about a minute to find it then copy paste it

rock on vag

 

[Wand3rlust]

*feels decidedly unwelcome, just cos of a 'u' - leaves*

 

[vagrantx]

rock on vag

HAH as much as I appreciate the shocking nickname, you can just call me V