Deepest Darkest Secret your spouse/partner doesn't know!!!

Then I'd say it's over. A marriage without fucking at your age is unthinkable.
To me, that seems like a very shallow view of marriage, and it makes me think maybe our conservative upbringing was correct. Since we were virgins when we got married, we married each other for the person we are, not for the amount of pleasure we provide. i do not think anything could hurt my feelings more than to find out that my husband married me just for sex.
 
Now I'm confused ... how does he want sex all the time but not intercourse? Does he think he's not "big" enough or that he won't last long enough for you to get satisfaction too? :oops:

You seriously need to sit down and talk about it - with a therapist if necessary.
Yes, he wants sex all the time but not intercourse, because he does not last very long, and it embarrasses him.

Will talking about it help him last longer?
 
Yes, he wants sex all the time but not intercourse, because he does not last very long, and it embarrasses him.

Will talking about it help him last longer?
Do you think you could beat him at his on game. That is, randomly begin to stroke him and demand an orgasm from him but do this more often than he can recover.
 
As crazy as it sounds, he wants me to look elsewhere. When I found Lit and other guys were on here saying they wanted their wife to have sex with another man, I learned that my husband was not alone. I read these forums for hours and hours trying to figure it all out.
It's thinking that my wife has a libido..
Sorta died in our home.. It's nice thinking it's alive elsewhere.
 
Yes, he wants sex all the time but not intercourse, because he does not last very long, and it embarrasses him.

Will talking about it help him last longer?
You are both young and still learning about each others triggers. If he can get hard multiple times, ride him and let him penetrate you multiple times a day. His confidence will build with time and he will begin to control PE. Each successful orgasm in men take longer to achieve in a given time frame. Believe it or not, he is normal, just needs to learn how to slow it down. Good luck LeaHaven.
 
Yes, he wants sex all the time but not intercourse, because he does not last very long, and it embarrasses him.

Will talking about it help him last longer?
As others have said, it's all a matter of timing and learning how to get the best from him. As you're both presumably still young and in good health, he should be able to recover his erection many times during a prolonged bout of sexual activity ... the more you practice, the better he'll get (we all have that problem in the beginning!).

Enjoy long bouts of foreplay, plenty of oral - not just sucking his cock or letting him lick your pussy - kissing, nibbling necks and chests (tits and nipples), plenty of touching. maybe some ass play ... then when he enters you for the first time, take it slowly and when he says he's getting close, pull him out and let him relax for a while before slipping him back in - do that a few times and then he should last long enough for you both to enjoy a nice orgasm ... other than that, let him cum quickly, then get him back up to full mast and do it again - he should last a bit longer (and even longer when he's cum again and recovered his erection) and so on.

Practice a lot and don't let him feel inadequate when he cums quickly.
 
To me, that seems like a very shallow view of marriage, and it makes me think maybe our conservative upbringing was correct. Since we were virgins when we got married, we married each other for the person we are, not for the amount of pleasure we provide. i do not think anything could hurt my feelings more than to find out that my husband married me just for sex.

I think that marrying someone "just for sex" is very different from marrying someone with the expectation that sex is part of marriage.

Imagine if your husband decided to quit his job and sit around in his underwear eating Cheetos all day. It is reasonable that you would expect him to do more to contribute to the household and the relationship. That doesn't mean you married him just for the money he earns.

For most people sex is one of many things that are integral to an intimate relationship. It won't always go as we might like, but just giving up on it is not a realistic or fair response to difficulties.

The challenge with looking elsewhere at this point is that even if he has encouraged that is he doing so because he genuinely wants that or is it a response to his sense of having let you down?

It is a tough position for a wife to be in. You shouldn't have to pretend he is satisfying you if he isn't. You need to be careful about how you approach the subject - I think that direct and diplomatic is best. But he needs to be able to hear it and embrace genuine changes.
 
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To me, that seems like a very shallow view of marriage, and it makes me think maybe our conservative upbringing was correct. Since we were virgins when we got married, we married each other for the person we are, not for the amount of pleasure we provide. i do not think anything could hurt my feelings more than to find out that my husband married me just for sex.
Not "just", including. If you don't have sex in your marriage, you're living with a pal.
 
Idk, but a lot of the guys at work flirt. I told my husband about it once over a year ago, and he said I should flirt back. I told him that was not going to happen, but as time has progressed and I get to know these guys better, sometimes I do flirt back. I used to feel bad about it, but I don't feel that way anymore.
I think most husbands, if they have been married a long time, would love to know their wives are attractive to other men. It is incredibly sexy to know your partner is desired by others. And the fantasy of the flirting leading a little further is highly erotic for what I imagine is the majority of husbands. Including me. The reality of it going 'too far' might be a very different thing.
 
I have two secrets:

I once sext with another woman, she turned me. I don't make a habit, and will only do it with her. So no ideas, please.

My best friend and I occasionally masturbate together. But it's strictly solo and no touching the other. So it's not really that bad.
 
One thing is that I really want to worship the feet of three of my female colleagues, one of them actually showed me her foot once in order to check her pedicure. Another thing is that i really enjoy watching tranny porn videos.
 
My darkest secrets are to be a submissive sissy boi. I have jacking off fantasies about sucking off some of our sons' friends. And I want to be a sissy white boi for some BBC. My wife has no idea how much I get off watching gay porn.
 
I stumbled on this thread just shortly after I decided there would be no more secrets. It was inspired by a TV show we were watching where the spouses told each other their secrets. So I told her mine - I am a sexual person. She already knows that I write stories because I share them with her. She usually doesn’t respond very strongly to my stories. She already knows that I watch porn sometimes. I told her that I think about sex a lot but usually I suppress it. For instance I will see her sitting in an arousing way and I’ll want to have sex right there, but I suppress the thought. Or I watch a sexy video and I’ll want to eat her out. I don’t tell her because I think she will judge me. As I considered everything I realized that it is really me judging myself. I am ashamed of being a horndog. But no more, I am no longer going to be ashamed, nor am I going to be afraid of being judged by my wife. So it’s no holds barred.

Since then I have been honest with her about masturbating. I have told her that I did it. Then last night I was cooking dinner and I felt like being nude. So I stripped and I put on an apron. She was in the kitchen while I did it and I told her I was going to do it and she was fine with it. She went on looking at her phone in the chair while I cooked. Then the meal reached a point where it needed to simmer for 15 minutes, and I had nothing else to do but wait. I said, I have 15 minutes, can I eat your pussy? She said yes! I pulled off her shoes and her pants and underwear and got down to business. For the first time ever I ate her out in that kitchen chair. It was super sexy and we both had a great time. When the timer dinged I finished up and went back to cooking. She said to me, you’re going to lick me again later, right? I took a Viagra after dinner.

So that’s my tale. No secrets lead to pussy licking while the stew simmered and more sex when we went to bed.
 
I stumbled on this thread just shortly after I decided there would be no more secrets. It was inspired by a TV show we were watching where the spouses told each other their secrets. So I told her mine - I am a sexual person. She already knows that I write stories because I share them with her. She usually doesn’t respond very strongly to my stories. She already knows that I watch porn sometimes. I told her that I think about sex a lot but usually I suppress it. For instance I will see her sitting in an arousing way and I’ll want to have sex right there, but I suppress the thought. Or I watch a sexy video and I’ll want to eat her out. I don’t tell her because I think she will judge me. As I considered everything I realized that it is really me judging myself. I am ashamed of being a horndog. But no more, I am no longer going to be ashamed, nor am I going to be afraid of being judged by my wife. So it’s no holds barred.

Since then I have been honest with her about masturbating. I have told her that I did it. Then last night I was cooking dinner and I felt like being nude. So I stripped and I put on an apron. She was in the kitchen while I did it and I told her I was going to do it and she was fine with it. She went on looking at her phone in the chair while I cooked. Then the meal reached a point where it needed to simmer for 15 minutes, and I had nothing else to do but wait. I said, I have 15 minutes, can I eat your pussy? She said yes! I pulled off her shoes and her pants and underwear and got down to business. For the first time ever I ate her out in that kitchen chair. It was super sexy and we both had a great time. When the timer dinged I finished up and went back to cooking. She said to me, you’re going to lick me again later, right? I took a Viagra after dinner.

So that’s my tale. No secrets lead to pussy licking while the stew simmered and more sex when we went to bed.
Good for you! I’m glad it worked out well! Wish I could do that with my wife! But she would probably drive a stick through my heart to be sure I was dead!!!
 
I stumbled on this thread just shortly after I decided there would be no more secrets. It was inspired by a TV show we were watching where the spouses told each other their secrets. So I told her mine - I am a sexual person ….

I think this is healthy to become as honest as possible. Though for many of us we started to share ourselves and met harsh resistance or disgust so we stop sharing. Many of us weren’t ok with the sexual part of ourselves as you said felt like horn dogs and maybe we hoped as our relationships deepened that we’d build trust then share but we became more entwined and committed but found out it risks more to be more open. Or they want want any part of it.

I think most husbands, if they have been married a long time, would love to know their wives are attractive to other men.

Totally. I want my wife to enjoy her sexual nature because that’s how I want to be treated. I hate feeling like my sexual desires are limited to her differing appetite and drive. I tease my wife when we bump into someone I know she finds attractive. I just look at her and she slaps my arm.

That’s as far as we go and she doesn’t want to do anything with anyone else (even with me feels like a fight) so I’m happy when I hear her enjoy her sexuality in some form.
 
I stumbled on this thread just shortly after I decided there would be no more secrets. It was inspired by a TV show we were watching where the spouses told each other their secrets. So I told her mine - I am a sexual person. She already knows that I write stories because I share them with her. She usually doesn’t respond very strongly to my stories. She already knows that I watch porn sometimes. I told her that I think about sex a lot but usually I suppress it. For instance I will see her sitting in an arousing way and I’ll want to have sex right there, but I suppress the thought. Or I watch a sexy video and I’ll want to eat her out. I don’t tell her because I think she will judge me. As I considered everything I realized that it is really me judging myself. I am ashamed of being a horndog. But no more, I am no longer going to be ashamed, nor am I going to be afraid of being judged by my wife. So it’s no holds barred.

Since then I have been honest with her about masturbating. I have told her that I did it. Then last night I was cooking dinner and I felt like being nude. So I stripped and I put on an apron. She was in the kitchen while I did it and I told her I was going to do it and she was fine with it. She went on looking at her phone in the chair while I cooked. Then the meal reached a point where it needed to simmer for 15 minutes, and I had nothing else to do but wait. I said, I have 15 minutes, can I eat your pussy? She said yes! I pulled off her shoes and her pants and underwear and got down to business. For the first time ever I ate her out in that kitchen chair. It was super sexy and we both had a great time. When the timer dinged I finished up and went back to cooking. She said to me, you’re going to lick me again later, right? I took a Viagra after dinner.

So that’s my tale. No secrets lead to pussy licking while the stew simmered and more sex when we went to bed.
Damn. You are bold.
 
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