For you submissives, is "vanilla" submission enough, or do you need an added kink?

[DevotedHusband1]

I think one person's vanilla is another person's kink, in the sense that any experience can appeal to someone's submissive nature. My queen and I don't really do anything other than light BDSM, in terms of actions that most people would think of as "kinky." But, I like it when she bosses me around, talks over me, gives me a lecture, critiques something I've done, snaps at me, etc. I enjoy how this puts me in my place. And of course, there's a double standard which I also find hot: I am not allowed to do these things to her. Often if she's mad at me I find her anger really distressing in the moment...and then, afterward, I'll be thinking about it and find myself getting hard! I remember once she gave me an angry lecture that really got to the heart of some of my issues and left me mentally discombobulated for days. To this day, I love to stroke myself and think about it. I truly worship her and enjoy humbling myself for her by accepting her expressions of her authority. Is this "kinky"? I don't know and I don't care, I just know that it works for us.

 

[NancyPan]

No, vanilla submission is not enough. I “need” and want there to be a sexual component. I like it (“need it”) that She manages my orgasms and it is clear that being allowed an orgasm and/or being allowed to worship Her is dependent on my behavior and compliance. I do volunteer to do some chores sometimes for some single Female neighbors. I do enjoy this, as I view it as an act of submission and service to Women, but there is no sexual component. Simply serving without being teased and rewarded would not be enough for me. Fortunately for me, my Wife understands this. I love starting each day by kissing Her ass (She finds my arousal in this quite amusing.)

 

[MrMikelobe1952]

Why just let something that is exciting just simmer?

For me: why just stop? Why not test a limit or push it?
For me the pleasure is all about making the other guy excited and horny and uncontrollable. So sometimes the vanilla is ok. However, to get my pulse racing... slowly push me to stretch and test my limits.

This is mostly from my limited experience with my ex husband. He wasn't a "dom", we didn't have a name for it then or use a label. He was a horny pervert. I was his loving (naive) wife that wanted to make him happy, I thought that is what good wives did.

My parents divorced when i was very young and I was raised by my dad and older brothers. I would hear my dad talk, and it was always about my mom not doing something that he wanted. When I got older it was more about sex and intimacy. To be honest, my family just isn't intimate. Growing up and hearing this all the time I guess stuck with me.

Anyway, my ex and i were young and horny. He started asking me to do things like dressing sexier when his friends were around. That increased to me stripping for them, and then stripping at an establishment. It escalated and escalated and escalated. I was 17 and he was 19 and just joined the Army. we moved away from home. we had steady money coming in and we partied and cut loose being that far from Ohio. By the time he divorced me when I was 22 I was far beyond a slut. Of all of my army wife friends... I was probably the most wild but not far from normal.

I loved being told do thing or told I was going to try something. My heart raced whenever he got in an experimental mood.

I take it things are different with your current husband?

 

[SissySalina]

I have accepted that I am a submissive. While I have no desire to wear women's clothes, my most intense fantasies involve the right female sitting on my face, with me licking and sniffing her asshole, and her gently but firmly pegging me, opening me up more and more, being the lovingly dominant one.
However, in my case, unless there is an incest them, it just doesn't give me the arousal I'm looking for. For the longest time she would always be my sister. Lately I've gone back to the even earlier mother figure from when I first discovered these tendencies--big ass, big breasts, physically larger, taller and stronger than me.
What about the rest of you submissives? Is the act of submission enough for you, or do you need it to be in a certain context like incest or something else?

As a sissy submissiveness is natural. As to wearing women's clothes there is nothing like a nice petticoat to get the insides jumping. If you are referring to sexual arousal then sissy has gotten long past that. What sissy gets is that internal arousal, that feeling of joy spreading throughout, the feeling that sissy has made Her proud of Her sissy.
In simple terms it is like winning the Gold Medal in what ever sport She wishes sissy to participate in.

 

[SPARTAN047]

I don't think so, it needs to be a little kinky and sexy.

Chastity, living in a cage, humiliation, degradation, pee, leashes and collars, sexual and domestic slavery, spanking, milking, fingering, etc. Are some things I think of.

All within reasonable limits. I love my arse being groped, too. View attachment 2303084View attachment 2303085

 

[2ServeWoman]

The humiliation is thrilling

I crave intense humiliation and select pain within my limits - I was owned by my late Domme & my wife used to send me to her on weekends- sadly that was 19 years ago & since my wife’s libido crashed & I haven’t had the luxury of womanscent since - I’m still searching for a dirty, sadistic lady - especially if she isn’t a “Lady!” Although masculine and assertive, I’m submissive to woman & open to discuss ANYTHING I’m a very dirty old I womanscent is my kryptonite!

 

[switchersm]

I don't think so, it needs to be a little kinky and sexy.

Chastity, living in a cage, humiliation, degradation, pee, leashes and collars, sexual and domestic slavery, spanking, milking, fingering, etc. Are some things I think of.

All within reasonable limits. I love my arse being groped, too. View attachment 2303084View attachment 2303085

Must say, you look very sexy in that lingerie. Not mine kink, but really beautiful.

 

[switchersm]

My submission to my wife is joined to be kept chaste with cock cages permanent. That brought me to be not only sexual submissive to my wife. She's usually in my focus, I always look to pleasure her, to make her happy, care for her, attentive and polite. That's possibly the vanilla part. But I need more and get more. Regularly a hard spanking weekly, be exposed to others with cock cage in different private and public situations and places, once a month used by her and three of her best befriended women, contains humiliation and some pain also, cucked every weekend. So I see myself as one of the happiest submissive on earth and will not miss one of these kinks.

 

[Submissivepat]

I agree with everyone who wrote that in the beginning of their journey, plain domination, or vanilla domination, was enough. But as I began to really embrace my submissiveness, I craved more, particularly humiliation and eventually submitting to others or groups. Like I said, it’s a journey.

 

[Lucy_Lastic]

A degree of humiliation and degradation adds that extra edge.

 

[SPARTAN047]

Must say, you look very sexy in that lingerie. Not mine kink, but really beautiful.

Hey there, late reply but thanks! Appreciate your honesty and you're one of the few to compliment my efforts instead of the usual condemning or scathing remarks I get. I wish they'd f off and leave me alone if they hate sissies so much.

 

[lowcollar]

Being a vanilla sub is great once in a while. However, I find that I crave deeper humiliation and very wild bondage, pegging, whipping etc.

 

[Ash999]

I am a Sounding Fetishist...I.e. I love putting a stainless steel sterile rod into my penis as a Tribute to Goddess Kali and squeezing my Kegels.....ruined orgasm results....thick , transparent, viscous precum dribbles , leaks out in an exquisitely humiliating ruined orgasm..my 66 yr old prostate gland is sleek and slim and my PSA or prostate specific antigen is well within safe limits. I perform this twice a month. This is the Major driver of my submissiveness to Devi Kali!!!View attachment 2419159View attachment 2419160View attachment 2419161

 

[SPARTAN047]

I've seen sounding but it looks so painful.

 

[Ash999]

I've seen sounding but it looks so painful.

Au Contraire, SPARTAN It is quite enjoyable!!

 

[SPARTAN047]

Au Contraire, SPARTAN It is quite enjoyable!!

If I find a good Domme, I'll definitely give it a shot. Some BBW Domme sluts wanted to do it to me and I wish I'd tried to meet them more often.

 

[lowcollar]

I much prefer added kinks: Pegging, fisting, being spit on, being leashed, called names etc.

 

[SPARTAN047]

I much prefer added kinks: Pegging, fisting, being spit on, being leashed, called names etc.

We share those kinks, I love being called a slut and cunt.

 

[Katiekins7018]

I need more than vanilla bdsm; I crave degradation, humiliation and adventure.

 

[2ServeWoman]

I’m, it’d suck if you’re a sub, too? I crave intense humiliation and select pain!

 

[TrainMe24]

I'm going to need to kinky sprinkles on top of the vanilla cupcake.

Maybe make it a funfetti cupcake. Double the sprinkles that way

 

[2ServeWoman]

My nipples crave intense discomfort and pain!
It’s like they are pumping my dick hard & it drools making me quite the dirty

 

[apom]

I generally want whatever I'm told to want. If vanilla pleases them it pleases me.

 

[Erosfan]

My submission is for both of us. I love CFNM and I love to let go where she takes the lead. We have played quite a lot with this and have had some amazing experiences. Ours is more of a loving wife's kind of thing where she can do with me as she wishes and I gladly follow her lead. My desire is to be her fantasy.
Some of our best orgasms (both of us) have occurred while playing with this.

 

[Britva415]

I don’t think that subbing “for the vanilla“ is even very subby.

I’m a switch and subbing for me really calls for something beyond the pale, or it doesn’t push that sub button.