Fantasy vs Reality

[MinxDark]

Rape is horrific. Incest, especially when perpetrated on one's own children, is horrific. Older people taking sexual advantage of younger, less experienced people is completely awful. Being molested by strangers is terrifying and horrible.

And yet we fantasize about these things and they turn us on. I know actual rape survivors who love rape fantasy. The idea of sex with my actual dad makes me want to throw up. Like OMG just no. Yet I love to roleplay with Daddies and fuck but does that ever get my panties wet. Love the fantasy of forced orgasm yet actually having something like that happen would be nightmarish.

When you think about it, it sounds completely nuts. Things most of us would never actually want to do, or have done to us, yet in the safe realm of fantasy are powerful aphrodisiacs. Why is that? Please share your thoughts. Bonus points if you share a thing you wouldn't ever actually do but fantasizing about it totally gets you off.

 

[KinoKe]

I hate to be the party pooper, but pretty much everything that has ever turned me on I have, sooner or later, tried. Mind you, I never had a thing about my mother, or about dressing up as a girl, or … well … none of those things. Sorry.

 

[MinxDark]

I hate to be the party pooper, but pretty much everything that has ever turned me on I have, sooner or later, tried. Mind you, I never had a thing about my mother, or about dressing up as a girl, or … well … none of those things. Sorry.

You obviously kinda do enjoy being a party pooper though. A gazillion threads to respond to but you pick this one. Maybe THAT'S your kink. LOL

 

[screwher]

Fantasizing about these horrific scenarios I believe are the sexual equivalent of being scared in a safe environment. Like the rollercoaster or a dark theatre watching a scary movie. People like to be scared. People like to be aroused. It’s a combination of both.

My wife once confessed that she had fantasies of being raped by another man. The conversation got us both aroused and we were soon giving the bedroom mattress a work out. Afterward I started fantasizing myself about Mrs.Screwher being forced by another. Fantasizing to the point of masturbation and even chatting about it on this site.

 

[KinoKe]

You obviously kinda do enjoy being a party pooper though. A gazillion threads to respond to but you pick this one. Maybe THAT'S your kink. LOL

Gadzooks! You've rumbled me. <eek>

 

[MinxDark]

Fantasizing about these horrific scenarios I believe are the sexual equivalent of being scared in a safe environment. Like the rollercoaster or a dark theatre watching a scary movie. People like to be scared. People like to be aroused. It’s a combination of both.

My wife once confessed that she had fantasies of being raped by another man. The conversation got us both aroused and we were soon giving the bedroom mattress a work out. Afterward I started fantasizing myself about Mrs.Screwher being forced by another. Fantasizing to the point of masturbation and even chatting about it on this site.

I think there's something to that. the whole "being scared in a safe environment." I once had a lover who would create incredibly elaborate scenarios with me about who we were... and invariably either I was being coerced (arranged marriage, blackmail, etc) into sex or I was a recently purchased slave girl about to be raped. It was some of the best sex we ever had.

 

[MinxDark]

Aw no one wants to share?

 

[HornyHeidi]

......……...………......………...

 

[OldFred65]

I agree with you about rape and forced sex being terrible, but beyond that I disagree. Incest between consenting adults is perfectly okay in my book no matter what their relationship to each other. Everyone needs some sexual release and we all should be willing to help each other out with that. What adults do with each other is their own business.

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

When you think about it, it sounds completely nuts. Things most of us would never actually want to do, or have done to us, yet in the safe realm of fantasy are powerful aphrodisiacs. Why is that? Please share your thoughts. Bonus points if you share a thing you wouldn't ever actually do but fantasizing about it totally gets you off.

Someone earlier in the thread said it was like riding a roller coaster--there's the thrill of danger but you're completely safe the whole time. I'd add there's also the thrill of transgression--knowing that you're crossing some line that society says you shouldn't cross, but doing it in way that there aren't any consequences.

In my day-to-day life I'm very vanilla. I'm happily married with two kids and a nice middle-class life. I'm pretty much fine with my life as it is, and I have no desire to mess it up with an affair or exhibitionism or kinky sex.

But ... when my mind wanders that's exactly the direction my fantasies tend to go. So I fantasize about being made to strip for a room of strange men. They take turns having me suck their cocks, and then take turns fucking me. Without protection, I might add, so the whole time they're bragging about getting me pregnant.

In reality, no, I absolutely wouldn't want that and it would be horribly traumatizing. But there's a bad girl deep inside me who finds the thought of it incredibly hot ... .

 

[PleasePeesMe]

I get that

completely. Fantasy allows us to explore things we never really would. And get off.

 

[gtnlynn]

My wife was having sex in college when the guy pulled out and rammed his cock into her ass. It hurt like hell, and she screamed in pain. She would never have anal sex again, and she warned me never to try it. A finger is fine, but nothing bigger. Still, she confessed that she sometimes has fantasies of having a big cock in her ass, but there is no pain in the fantasy.

 

[HoldYouDown]

I think the "roller coaster" analogy nailed it.

But in the spirit of sharing, most women I've been with have had some kind of "loss of control" fantasy, up to and including rape. I've also indulged in daddy/daughter fantasies, a little incest and some fantasies that can't be discussed here because apparently rape is okay as a fantasy but not other stuff according to Lit. Not to mention humiliation stuff, bondage and all that. And as a man it's fun to be part of it too.

 

[MinxDark]

Someone earlier in the thread said it was like riding a roller coaster--there's the thrill of danger but you're completely safe the whole time. I'd add there's also the thrill of transgression--knowing that you're crossing some line that society says you shouldn't cross, but doing it in way that there aren't any consequences.

In my day-to-day life I'm very vanilla. I'm happily married with two kids and a nice middle-class life. I'm pretty much fine with my life as it is, and I have no desire to mess it up with an affair or exhibitionism or kinky sex.

But ... when my mind wanders that's exactly the direction my fantasies tend to go. So I fantasize about being made to strip for a room of strange men. They take turns having me suck their cocks, and then take turns fucking me. Without protection, I might add, so the whole time they're bragging about getting me pregnant.

In reality, no, I absolutely wouldn't want that and it would be horribly traumatizing. But there's a bad girl deep inside me who finds the thought of it incredibly hot ... .

I absolutely get where you are coming from. I love the fantasy of being coerced and forced to cum. Of being told what a wanton slut I am because I like it and look how wet my pussy is. I don't care if it's having toys used on me or a thick cock being forced up inside me after I've been forced to cum and am already dripping. Being so embarrassed and full of shame and even crying while I cum. Never a position I'd want to really be in but even just writing about it here is starting to make me wet! LOL

 

[MinxDark]

I think the "roller coaster" analogy nailed it.

But in the spirit of sharing, most women I've been with have had some kind of "loss of control" fantasy, up to and including rape. I've also indulged in daddy/daughter fantasies, a little incest and some fantasies that can't be discussed here because apparently rape is okay as a fantasy but not other stuff according to Lit. Not to mention humiliation stuff, bondage and all that. And as a man it's fun to be part of it too.

That's my other weakness. Daddy fantasies. Pushing Daddy's buttons til he drags me into my bedroom and bends me over the bed to yank my pants down and spank me with his hard hands. And then him realizing my panties are wet and he instantly gets hard. And he's furious and ashamed and starts jerking off, hoping I won't notice while he keeps spanking me but he eventually cums all over my panties. Ooof... fucking delicious. LOL

 

[philly1]

My response

I totally get that reality vs fantasy. But mine is not quite about rape/ incest, my/ our fantasy is based upon a 3 some. So although it’s not quite as extreme as some others, the fantasy part definitely excites us but the thought of reality is a bit scary. Would it work ? Would they be cool? Would it ruin our relationship? Etc I know , I know, some kink but def not extreme again. Just sharing my thoughts.

 

[MinxDark]

I totally get that reality vs fantasy. But mine is not quite about rape/ incest, my/ our fantasy is based upon a 3 some. So although it’s not quite as extreme as some others, the fantasy part definitely excites us but the thought of reality is a bit scary. Would it work ? Would they be cool? Would it ruin our relationship? Etc I know , I know, some kink but def not extreme again. Just sharing my thoughts.

That's totally ok though! A lot of people fantasize about a three some or more or even an orgy but don't do it for a lot of good reasons. But what guy doesn't get off to the idea of fucking his wife's hot friend while she licks his wife's wet pussy? And watching her face while she pants and moans about how good it is and she hopes you're enjoying her friend's little cunt?

 

[BrightShinyGirl]

I absolutely get where you are coming from. I love the fantasy of being coerced and forced to cum. Of being told what a wanton slut I am because I like it and look how wet my pussy is. I don't care if it's having toys used on me or a thick cock being forced up inside me after I've been forced to cum and am already dripping. Being so embarrassed and full of shame and even crying while I cum. Never a position I'd want to really be in but even just writing about it here is starting to make me wet! LOL

Oh my. Yes.

Not the crying part ... that's not a fantasy of mine, but being pushed way outside my normal comfort zone and cumming in front of people ... that. There's something about the idea of losing control that gets to me. The thought of being so aroused that I can't help myself, so aroused that I wind up openly masturbating to orgasm in front of an audience because I can't hold myself back. <shivers>

 

[MinxDark]

Oh my. Yes.

Not the crying part ... that's not a fantasy of mine, but being pushed way outside my normal comfort zone and cumming in front of people ... that. There's something about the idea of losing control that gets to me. The thought of being so aroused that I can't help myself, so aroused that I wind up openly masturbating to orgasm in front of an audience because I can't hold myself back. <shivers>

Oh my. That IS hot! How do you get pushed to that edge in your fantasy?

 

[t_platz4]

online vs. real life

First, I really enjoy this thread. This topic has always fascinated me.

In addition to fantasy, the fact that we can share these thoughts online is part of that. Being anonymous means that I feel free to talk about my darker fantasies with the right people.

Some fantasies are just too dangerous to try in real life without devastating consequences. I have traded stories with some people that I would be too nervous to admit to anyone that knows me in real life.

When I have pushed myself to share some sexual kinks with someone, there is a huge rush of adrenaline... and that can get even bigger the few times I've been brave enough to be on web cam. In those experiments, it is being vulnerable and submitting to someone else's fantasies that really give me what I'm looking for. It does keep me coming back for more.

 

[MinxDark]

First, I really enjoy this thread. This topic has always fascinated me.

In addition to fantasy, the fact that we can share these thoughts online is part of that. Being anonymous means that I feel free to talk about my darker fantasies with the right people.

Some fantasies are just too dangerous to try in real life without devastating consequences. I have traded stories with some people that I would be too nervous to admit to anyone that knows me in real life.

When I have pushed myself to share some sexual kinks with someone, there is a huge rush of adrenaline... and that can get even bigger the few times I've been brave enough to be on web cam. In those experiments, it is being vulnerable and submitting to someone else's fantasies that really give me what I'm looking for. It does keep me coming back for more.

It's so much easier to open up to strangers you'll never have to see about some things, isn't it? Do you let them tell you what to do sometimes and do you really do it?

 

[t_platz4]

yes

If I've gotten to the point of revealing everything but my face on cam, then yes, I do let them tell me what to do... and if it isn't permanently harmful, unsafe or past my limits, I really do do it.

Sometimes I have been lucky and the fantasy was something I always wanted to try anyway, but just needed a push and an audience of one encouraging me and making me feel sexy.

On one occasion it was figging.

 

[MinxDark]

If I've gotten to the point of revealing everything but my face on cam, then yes, I do let them tell me what to do... and if it isn't permanently harmful, unsafe or past my limits, I really do do it.

Sometimes I have been lucky and the fantasy was something I always wanted to try anyway, but just needed a push and an audience of one encouraging me and making me feel sexy.

On one occasion it was figging.

I actually had to look that up! LOL You are braver than I!

 

[M1das12]

I get what your saying. Its the fact that it is taboo that turns me on. If having sex with a family member was considered "vanilla" I probably wouldn't be into it. That being said my family members arent even remotely attractive to me. My sister does all the crazy hair colors and dresses weird. My mom and brother have given up on their looks so they arent attractive, to me. If they were attractive to me I might have a harder time saying no.

 

[roseburgsteve]

i have found sometimes fantasy is better left as fantasy. and sometimes its very exciting to make the fantasy come true. just my opinion.