❓ PLP Inquires❓

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03.03.20

How do you determine if someone has good judgement? In life and on Lit.

only one way i know that’s worth a damn...history. how have their previous decisions turned out? you can’t judge a book by its cover (although it happens all the time), you’ve got to do the research. that said, i don’t select the people i hang around with based on their judgement or lack thereof. i also don’t go along with every decision made by others, unless they have first inebriated me with mass quantities of alcohol.
 
Well, I'd be interested to hear your take on this. It was something I'd planned to ask you on AMA, were you ever to do it.

And I guess I could just have sent a PM. But that would involve sending a PM, and I'm British, and we haven't been introduced so obviously that would be unthinkable.

So...yes please?

I’d be very interested in your rational. 🙂



Yes! Reverse facial recognition is out there. PimEyes. You can pay for premium services with advanced features. Tineye has been around forever. There’s others.
It.is.scary.

I think we forget about the lurkers around here. Those that open an account, never post, remain invisible and watch. Out of sight and out of mind, hidden. The PG is only a fraction of this site, the familiar names we see. No one knows who all drifts in and out of here.
Views compared to comments on pic threads. (Not counting Tumblr imagery)
**Shivers**


just remember, y'all invited it.

Well, so far everyone seems focused on the attention seeking personality type. Exhibitionism is more often practiced by the sensation seeking personality type. Though, ampics is not as representative as of typical exhibitionism. Anyway, sensation seeking types seek as many new, different, and intense experiences as possible, are not risk adverse, and thrive in these extremely varied and intense situations. They have a low threshold for boredom, are disinhibited, seek any new experience, and often even enjoy risk. They are seen in extreme sports players, firefighting, tactical agents, those who poking bears, jumping off bridges, etc. They are my friend Mickey whose current long running hobby is venomous reptiles (yes he has been bitten, three times actually). They are my friend in Colorado who is an extreme snowboarder, my brother the extreme skateboarder who has abused our mom’s health insurance in more ways than I can count. They are me from living with nomadic hippies, to being a body piercer, to car surfing, roof hopped, bridge jumping etc etc. I may not lean to the hard physicality most people think of, as I do understand my limits, and am lower risk than many.

This is largely genetic trait. The exact level of risk associated will vary, of course, but telling a sensation seeking person to not be because not is the typical and smart thing to do so do it, is like telling a gay person or a an autistic person to just be typical because it is easier and smarter to not be. Yes, there are many industries built just around that concept, and they don’t work. Plus one could argue taking as much information in, is actually the only way to grow. Either way, to even begin to understand, you have to accept that there is a human spectrum, people are wired differently, and not everyone analyzes risk and associates risk with fear the way most do. Risk is just another puzzle to be solved and mitigated in the search for new sensations. My risk may seem high to outsiders, but they are calculated with a high likelihood of success. How fast is the speed, how far is the drop, how experienced are the players. Taking my last new step of having a family has indeed factored heavily into my risk/reward threshold. I will not be running off with traveling hippies or jumping off bridges or car surfing or robbing that bank to see if I can. However, suppressing it to nothing isn’t possible either. I never came to lit for Ampics. I was very much craving new, exciting, thrilling interpersonal relationships and sexual experiences, however the risk/reward factor was too high but I couldn’t shake it either. I thought if I wrote about the ones I have had, might help the struggle. I found ampics instead. Internet nude exhibition was something I had never done. Not only does it satiate my something new, for now, it also really fucking turns me on. Don’t underestimate what people will do for a turn on either.

As to the risk calculation in response to ampics, well facial recognition seems big here. Many overestimate it. Like any other database, it is garbage in/garbage out. Taking a standard picture, and running it on facial recognition products that have been in the works for over 20 years is still less reliable than a person looking at a book of images of strangers, and we know how accurate eye witness testimony is. It is just the facts, research it, look at the algorithm success rates. Facebook’s only appears to work well because of a small database of just your friends, and it still misses and incorrectly tags often. My company’s recognition can usually get me if filtered to my office. It still sometimes fails on angles though. If I go to another state, they won’t find me efficiently as they have to widen the filter and get 100s. In a larger database I played with, they matched my image with over 44,000 as possible matches. Many of these women looked remarkably like me, some less. The science is sound, but garbage in, garbage out. That is why China has 3D Infrared cameras everywhere. This is why Apple and Google didn’t launch facial unlock until adding infrared cameras into the Pixel and X. And they only have a database of one. The database isn’t the only important factor, nor the algorithms, it is the camera technology and 3d IR is promising. 2d low res is not.. Though people can just wear IR diffusion lens, because garbage in/garbage out. Assuming you aren’t posting the same picture everywhere, where a pixel color/placement algorithm comes into play, stranger Bunny Boiler Ben isn’t chasing down all 44,000 of those women, or worse if you take angled photos. If stranger Bunny Boiler Ben finds you, it was your words.

Next risk is someone in your life recognizing you. Unlike bunny boiler ben, that is more real. And indeed, posting pictures is a risk. Factoring in membership, penetration, population density, my personal penetration, that risk is about 0.04%. And what is the result if that actually comes to fruition, as another put, it is primarily embarrassment. So if we accept I am going to find something new and exciting because that is simply who I am and being different can be ok even if you don’t understand it, and that it is kind of hard for me to find new because of who I have always been they question is still why ampics. Other ones on the table, owning a motorcycle. I have ridden a bit, but never owned one. Risk of death is 0.07%, risk of injury 3%. A shiny new man for an affair, risk of blowing up my family 25%. Lit is a risk of embarrassment at 0.04%,.winner winner chicken dinner. It is low risk in the grand scheme of things, it is giving me something new, it is turning me on too, and works well with my schedule. Did I mention the turn on. The risk/reward works heavily in my favor right now.
 
That was a very interesting read, justa. Thank you for taking the time to share.
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?



A woman I had feelings for in high school dated one of my best friends now all the way through school before he came out. It was challenging not to make a move on her more than simple flirting I had too much respect for both of them. However once they broke up I was already moved away. Believe she’s happily married living states away and we’ve not spoken in over 10 years. And another friend told me she saw me as a brother when I had feelings for her. We stayed friends but it was a little awkward afterward.
Not really sure that I’ve experienced it on lit so much though.
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

I think you can remain friendly with someone you had unrequited love for. But if you still have it then it's best to let them go and spiral into an unrequited depression :)
 
But if you still have it then it's best to let them go and spiral into an unrequited depression :)

LOL!! Been there a time or two. :rolleyes:

03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

If they don't know i have feels for them and they haven't shown any interest, then i hold them at a distance and we can be friendly, but not friends.

If they find out ( :eek: ) and it's a no go, then it's too painful for me to be around them.



So no. :p
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

Yes, I've remained friendly with someone that I had unrequited feelings for, though I did give myself some time to let the feelings lessen first or kinda kept them at a distance for a bit, at least emotionally if not physically.
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?


To a certain extent this depends on just how serious the unrequited feelings are. Is it just an attraction, or a crush? Then it's no problem. There have been a number of times in my life where I've had to just compartmentalize something like that, for any number of reasons, and her just not being into me is a pretty good reason to just let it go. In cases like that I find that it isn't particularly difficult to set feelings aside and just be friends with someone. There will, from time to time, be pangs or fantasies. You learn to let them have their place and time, then put them aside.

And I've not often had a situation where it was anything more than that. Maybe I was just always more accepting that things weren't going to happen. Maybe I just got used to be the guy on the outside looking in, used to rejection or unrequited feeling. Maybe I'm just a selfish asshole? But for the most part it was pretty easy to just shrug it off and move on. I try not to dwell when I don't have to.

Though, having said that, I can only think of one time in life that I was truly, deeply and intensely in love with someone in that situation. And we not only stayed friends, but were, and remain to this day, the best of friends. It was sometimes brutal, when she was dating new guys and falling in love in particular, but for whatever reason I never turned away.

What I felt for her has changed over the years. What was once a deep and passionate sexual love, far and away eclipsing anything I've ever felt for anybody else in my whole life, has cooled. But it's still love. Just a familial, bonded love of true friendship. I still can't imagine my life without her in it in some capacity, and I know that in that regard she feels the same. We could never be lovers, but we will always be a part of each other.
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

hum, well love, ok, it takes me a long time to classify feelings as love, and if I love you, I do and that happens in many forms. It may grow, it may change to a different type of love as the relationship evolves. I can love them like a partner or a friend. If I love you I would ideally like to maintain a relationship, whatever form it takes. Again, this is not an overly common scenario as the amount of time needed for them to be in my life to elevate to the concept of love is high and it wasn't unrequited, at least not always. You put in time and effort to get there, probably meeting me more than half way at time, climbed a fence or two, with some barbed wire. If the tone of the relationship changes with time, I accept that.

Less dramatic affection, attraction, lust; the answer is still yes, an easy yes. Though whether the friendship will weather time, I don't know. It could run its course and we lose touch, it could grow and change to more, it could remain stable, who knows.
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

No.
Obviously not, hence the "no".
Again, obviously not, hence the first "no".

That kind of love, only causes pain and heartache when it isnt returned. Why would I do that over and over and over and over...thinking this time will be different. Ask Forrest Gump.
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

There's no such thing for me, not anymore
I call it hard to get

In my real life, it happened twice
I was in love with her, but she had a man
I eventually gave her an ultimatum, she cried and I lost.
That was the straw to cure me, of being shy. I vowed to never let an opportunity pass me again. I will never fear rejection and let someone else take, what is mine.

The second time, we were sexual, but she wouldn't give in to emotions. For years of us fucking around, my love wasn't returned. The more she denied me, the more I craved it and became more determined to get it. Whenever I started to give up hope, all she had to do is give me a glimmer of hope and I was back on it, full throttle. I eventually got into a relationship, we stood friends, I hung out with her and she revealed her love for me. It was a crazy emotional night. She's happily married now and were still friends.

Yes, it's possible to remain friends
Love never disappears, if it's truly love
If you both moved on, you get to be happy for her, but the feeling never fully disappear.
 
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03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

I don’t believe I have ever experienced unrequited love. I “fall in love” over different things, I guess. Kapital K I joked we were probably the only couple who had a song AND a word. I fell for someone after they had found a bottle of my favorite win, which was hard to find at the time. It was just that little detail, that they had paid attention to what I ordered AND made the effort. So normally if someone isn’t interested in me then I lose interest pretty fast too.
 
03.06.20

Is there a sweet spot for you where tech and sex meet? Is the expanding availability of ways to get kinky with and through tech exciting or unnerving to you?

Do you think new "social norms" are being created and could the concept of monogamy include a sex robot? Discuss!
 
03.03.20

How do you determine if someone has good judgement? In life and on Lit.

I think after reading everyone's response - I agree with LurkingPhoenix. You know good judgement when you see it. You know bad judgement when you see it.
In life and Lit, it's very difficult to quarantine yourself from others bad judgment and the effects it has on you. So just labeling it doesnt really matter, you have to change how you interact with people.
 
03.05.20

Unrequited Love

Or something slightly less dramatic.

Can you remain friendly with someone who you have unrequited feelings for? Have you ever done this? Did the feelings abate?

I don't think it's ever gone so far as love but, of course, all not all feelings will be reciprocated. I do think you can be friends after depending on the intensity of the feelings. And sometimes the feelings are equal but you can't be together, you will only ever be friends, and that's kind of fun.
 
03.06.20

Is there a sweet spot for you where tech and sex meet? Is the expanding availability of ways to get kinky with and through tech exciting or unnerving to you?

Do you think new "social norms" are being created and could the concept of monogamy include a sex robot? Discuss!

I don’t know anything about sex robots, so discounting for that, sex and tech. I’m sure there are multiple ways, Real Sex on HBO style, people use tech for kink.

My experience is limited to bluetooth toys, which are fucking amazing, and Skype. Which is fine. I think if I DIDN’T know what his hands and lips felt like, Skype would be fine. But I do, and it’s a shitty substitute and I am often reminded of that. Bluetooth toys are great, and if it’s your thing, you can have male and female ones that work ‘together’.

As much as some tech has been instrumental in our relationship (airplanes! E commerce!) but I can’t see VR sex with him being good enough after having the real thing. Over and over again.
 
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