Numi's boudoir

[scotluvsoral]

This really made me laugh yesterday morning. The radio was on, Stephen Fry talking about how deaf children and children of deaf parents acquire language, in this case sign language. And he played a clip of Caitlin Moran on stage, when her sign language interpreter had to make the sign for 'camel toe'.

I Googled it, of course. Here it is:

https://i.imgur.com/MYCMHgC.jpg



The full thing is on YouTube here. 'Camel toe' is a couple of minutes in.

That whole video was hilarious!!

 

[AlliaPotestas]

This really made me laugh yesterday morning. The radio was on, Stephen Fry talking about how deaf children and children of deaf parents acquire language, in this case sign language. And he played a clip of Caitlin Moran on stage, when her sign language interpreter had to make the sign for 'camel toe'.

I Googled it, of course. Here it is:

https://i.imgur.com/MYCMHgC.jpg



The full thing is on YouTube here. 'Camel toe' is a couple of minutes in.

I once saw the lovely Arthur Smith do a show with a sign language interpreter... he spent the whole thing doing rude words and then pausing so we all had time to fully appreciate the sign...

 

[Jakevillines]

I was cutting some dried fruit into my muesli yesterday. This is what it looked like:

https://i.imgur.com/GsAxNSS.jpg

Do you want to watch me eat that?

 

[Jakevillines]

On 'the sleeve'

There are lots of toys in my toy box. Lots. Some come out often. Some come out rarely. Some are more successful than others... (and Tink has a whole toy review thread about what works and what doesn't). For the most part their common feature is that they are for female stimulation, for use either by me or by someone on my behalf. Or my behind

So it was a deliberate decision to try to find something to add to the collection which would be for my man specifically. I've never been drawn to fleshlights, they look a bit yucky to me. I have been told that the stimulation is good, pleasurable and natural-feeling, but I don't think I would like to use one on a man, and I'm sure I wouldn't like the clean-up afterwards. Which is making it all about me, I realise, but still. Ew...

A search through a popular sex toy purveyor's website threw up the PDX Elite, which looked interesting.

http://i.imgur.com/XAOYGjh.jpg

It was described as a 'male masturbator', or 'stroker'.

It looks like a tiny stingray with those flaps on either side, the 'spine' and the protruding head. The spine is a vibrating bullet vibe, the flaps are curved to fit the cock shaft, and are lightly ribbed on the inside.

It was very clear, very quickly, that it was extremely effective. The first time I used it on my man, he went from nought to sixty in about ten seconds flat. I learned fast that I had to take it slowly!

From the beginning, then. It slips easily onto a stiff, well-lubed cock. This means that there's a nice build-up before it's time to put it in place. A period of stroking with a human hand, the application of a little coconut oil, watching it melt, spreading it all along the shaft, over the head and back down to the corona. It's important to make sure it's properly distributed everywhere, slippery and glistening. I like to pay particular attention to the frenulum, because I know the stroker will be especially effective there.

Once the cock is properly prepared, you can slip the sleeve over the base, vibrating spine at the top. Remembering to switch on the vibrator first, of course The flaps are a little rigid, so it's a snug fit, but not too tight. There's room to vary the 'hold' by squeezing a little or relaxing the hand.

This is what it looks like in situ. (Warning - that's an explicit pic. And aologies for the low light and the rather 'Christmassy' background ).

When there's steel cockring in play, as in the pic above, the tail of the vibrator can come into contact with the ring at the base position, which transfers the vibration right around the ring.

It comes into its own with the stroking, of course. I like to slide it slowly up the shaft towards the head. As it gets nearer, the vibrating tip gets closer and closer to the frenulum, until it's vibrating right along the length of the frenulum, the cries of ecstasy are getting louder and more urgent, and I have to back off, otherwise it's all going to be over rather quickly!

The noises my man makes when I do this put me in mind of how I feel when the ears of my rabbit vibrator come into contact with my clit. A feeling of intense stimulation that you can't control, even if you wanted to.

What's in it for me? It's a great toy for edging a man, if you're careful, and you're confident in your interpretation of his cues. I really like that you can still see the cock while it's in place, and the contrast between the rigid black flaps and the rigid human skin is lovely. On a purely practical note, the clean-up is a doddle, however far you go.

I especially like its propensity for precum generation. I'm a big fan of precum. Which is just as well, because the sleeve induces it in my man in gallons. You can see the start of that process here. (Warning - that one's explicit too... )

I imagine it would be a good toy for a man to use on himself, if he were so minded. I like being in charge of it, though. I like the control. The teasing. The taking him to the edge and back from it.

And the precum. I really like the precum.

Here's a link to the manufacturer's website. There's even a video on there, apparently. I haven't dared watch it!

Can I try this with you? Demo is needed.

 

[numeniusa]

That was hilariously novel and well worth the few minutes spent watching the video.

Much appreciated, I love well presented humor and a performer capable of taking advantage of an opportunity.

I'm not a huge fan of Caitlin Moran for some reason, but I did like that!

That whole video was hilarious!!

Glad you enjoyed it, Scot

I once saw the lovely Arthur Smith do a show with a sign language interpreter... he spent the whole thing doing rude words and then pausing so we all had time to fully appreciate the sign...

Ah, Arthur... Wasn't it he who challenged Tony Hawkes to play the Moldovans at tennis?

I bet sign language interpreters on stage get that a lot Well, maybe not in a Serious Play *arches eyebrow*, but certainly in stand-up and comic stuff.

I'll see if I can find some more rude signs...

 

[numeniusa]

Do you want to watch me eat that?

You're waaaay too late there. I have already slavered my way through the pussy pears

Can I try this with you? Demo is needed.

Did you watch the video? Are there any, um, live performers in there?

 

[Jakevillines]

You're waaaay too late there. I have already slavered my way through the pussy pears





Did you watch the video? Are there any, um, live performers in there?

No live performances. I am tempted to get one.

 

[Jakevillines]

The actual toy not the performance. Hahaha.

 

[numeniusa]

No live performances. I am tempted to get one.

The actual toy not the performance. Hahaha.

Hmm. Maybe I should watch the video, I might be using it incorrectly....

Seriously, though, I'd highly recommend it, you can use it alone or a partner can use it on you, and it cleans really easily, which (I believe) can't be said about a fleshlight...

 

[numeniusa]

Further to the rude sign language signs, I found these, all of which I love...

Arsehole

Dickhead

Twat

Bollocks

Clearly, that's British Sign Language...

You can watch them in action here and here, the lady is fabulous

 

[tnman03]

Hmm. Maybe I should watch the video, I might be using it incorrectly....

Seriously, though, I'd highly recommend it, you can use it alone or a partner can use it on you, and it cleans really easily, which (I believe) can't be said about a fleshlight...

Further to the rude sign language signs, I found these, all of which I love...


Clearly, that's British Sign Language...

You can watch them in action , the lady is fabulous

Yeah... the Fleshlight is one of those ideals that sounds great but is enough of a PITA to clean and sanitize that it ends up buried in a box in the back of the closet.

And the videos and stills of BSL swearing were funny. I always forget how many swear words you have that we don't use here or in some cases have never heard before.

 

[AlliaPotestas]

Was thinking of you today...

https://forum.literotica.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=2079392&d=1567805486

 

[Loxarchos]

Hi, Nume, just wanted to say thanks for the welcome earlier and good to be back!

 

[numeniusa]

Yeah... the Fleshlight is one of those ideals that sounds great but is enough of a PITA to clean and sanitize that it ends up buried in a box in the back of the closet.

And the videos and stills of BSL swearing were funny. I always forget how many swear words you have that we don't use here or in some cases have never heard before.

Two countries divided by a common language...

Do you have swearwords we don't use that I might start introducing over here?

 

[numeniusa]

Was thinking of you today...

There he is! I love it. Still.Soooooo rude

He seems so joyful, so "Look! Look what I've got!". The horse is more difficult to read. I can't decide if it's thinking "Dude. Really?", or more "You think that's impressive...?"

 

[numeniusa]

Hi, Nume, just wanted to say thanks for the welcome earlier and good to be back!

Hey! You're very welcome I hope you'll stick around, I seem to remember last time we spoke I was in Canada playing in the snow. Which seems like a really long time ago

 

[numeniusa]

Now, as some may know, the English cricket team failed yesterday to prevent Australia from taking the Ashes back to Oz with them. Boo-hoo... But also, well played.

So, in fulfilment of a little bet with SH75, I present my new tattoo:

https://i.imgur.com/z7nlnLZ.jpg

If we can just prevent them in the final game from actually winning the series, I shall be a happy woman.

 

[Artfan2]

There he is! I love it. Still.Soooooo rude

He seems so joyful, so "Look! Look what I've got!". The horse is more difficult to read. I can't decide if it's thinking "Dude. Really?", or more "You think that's impressive...?"

He just had to show off by riding with no hands.

And you're right, the horse will definitely best him, if he's in the right, um, mood.

 

[scotluvsoral]

Now, as some may know, the English cricket team failed yesterday to prevent Australia from taking the Ashes back to Oz with them. Boo-hoo... But also, well played.

So, in fulfilment of a little bet with SH75, I present my new tattoo:

https://i.imgur.com/z7nlnLZ.jpg

If we can just prevent them in the final game from actually winning the series, I shall be a happy woman.

I know nothing about cricket..but I know you have one fine backside

 

[Sh75]

Now, as some may know, the English cricket team failed yesterday to prevent Australia from taking the Ashes back to Oz with them. Boo-hoo... But also, well played.

So, in fulfilment of a little bet with SH75, I present my new tattoo:

https://i.imgur.com/z7nlnLZ.jpg

If we can just prevent them in the final game from actually winning the series, I shall be a happy woman.

And i here i was thinking the best part of winning the ashes was taking home the urn and having bragging rights over the poms, but i stand corrected.
You are a woman of your word Numi and as always full of class and beauty.
P.S We have already won the series being the incumbents sweety . The Oval here we come!!!

 

[barefootgirl69]

Now, as some may know, the English cricket team failed yesterday to prevent Australia from taking the Ashes back to Oz with them. Boo-hoo... But also, well played.

So, in fulfilment of a little bet with SH75, I present my new tattoo:

https://i.imgur.com/z7nlnLZ.jpg

If we can just prevent them in the final game from actually winning the series, I shall be a happy woman.

I love it!

 

[Loxarchos]

Hey! You're very welcome I hope you'll stick around, I seem to remember last time we spoke I was in Canada playing in the snow. Which seems like a really long time ago

.....About two years, methinks lol.

And yes, I think I will. Good to see you!

 

[hairball18]

Now, as some may know, the English cricket team failed yesterday to prevent Australia from taking the Ashes back to Oz with them. Boo-hoo... But also, well played.

So, in fulfilment of a little bet with SH75, I present my new tattoo:

https://i.imgur.com/z7nlnLZ.jpg

If we can just prevent them in the final game from actually winning the series, I shall be a happy woman.

Any reason to look at you is a win for me.

 

[numeniusa]

He just had to show off by riding with no hands.

And you're right, the horse will definitely best him, if he's in the right, um, mood.

Hehe, I hadn't thought of the no hands position! It is said (though it may be apocryphal) that the cock unscrews, so it can be removed when the sculpture is unattended, in case of theft.

 

[numeniusa]

I know nothing about cricket..but I know you have one fine backside

Why thank you

Now let me tell you all about the LBW law...