Crimes of Passion

[Byron In Exile]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hx3Bz6cIPiw

Did Bruce Campbell just fire three shots from a double-barrel shotgun?

 

[CHNOPS]

None of the words she used, meant what those words mean, duh.

 

[Wings]

Because it's always about me.



Thanks for sharing.

Interesting.

 

[Wings]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hx3Bz6cIPiw

Did you see my user title before you posted this? I love that movie.

 

[Noor]

MUDS and talkers, never know what goes on in those rooms, I once planned a birthday party in one and everything thought we were having an orgy.

Good on you, Wings for the screen capture.

I am sure there is a lot more to this whole story but frankly it is history. Reci did wrong, she regrets it, that is that.

I always think of crimes of passion as murder, taking down people's sites, one friend's now ex wife gave away all his favorite clothes including a bespoke suit, during college I remember someone replacing lube with lidocaine, wiring the bedroom for sounds and then broadcasting the resultant non sex over pirate radio.

Any other good stories like that?

 

[Phelia]

Look, I don't agree with the trolls, but I also don't agree with the characterization that the people who are upset simply don't have or didn't understand all of the facts.

I tried very hard to communicate in my original post in this thread why this has changed my opinion of you, Reci. I'm going to try again. Perhaps it's wasted effort, but it seems like other people are similarly curious as to what the BD is here, so I'm going to really try to be very clear this time. I will include quotes for handy reference, and please feel free to click back to their original appearance to verify their context.

My primary issues are:

1. That you continued the sexual aspects of your online relationship after discovering he was underage.

14 is underage in any state of the union if you're in your mid to late twenties. So, that's unpleasant (and possibly illegal). Also that you knowingly allowed other adults to continue interacting with him in a sexually explicit manner without their being aware of his real age. That's unpleasant. I don't wish to get into this too deeply, but I will agree that while it is not entirely unheard of to find a 14 year old boy discussing sex on the internet, this:

Yup, this guy was born old. He was grateful to have someone to talk to that wasn't just interested in his talent with a whip.

The other women I knew that were involved with him were like "Does he make you do this?" Gods, no.

is a really strange reaction that I find a little concerning when I consider this in regards to his sexual roleplaying:

He'd been doing it for years before I got there, I didn't ask how he got started because I avoided the subject.

So being generous, we're talking about a 12 year old who was engaging in online BDSM sexual relationships with adults under the guise of adulthood, and your reaction upon learning about his age and his deception was to be impressed with his maturity. That's unpleasant.

And then:

I hugged a sixteen year old.

If you've decided that is unforgivable, then run with it and I'm okay with that. That's essentially what I did in reality.

What I did that was squicky was have a relationship in a roleplay sense online with the guy for a few years before that.

Despite the idea that I was 27 fucking a 13 year old, in reality the guy was online from when he was 13, I started talking to him as a person when he was 14 and I really, really love this guy. Really love him. He's smart and funny and awesome and I'm lucky to have had him in my life. I met him when he was 16 I did not have sex with him.

In essence this is like taking abuse from my relationship on Lit with EternalWinter. Love that guy. Care about him a lot. It was also in a sexual context and we were present together in sexual situations and joked and laughed and I was much older than he was.

You guys are nice and all, and if you think that what I did is...whatever it is...then that's fine. But my private relationships that I do not divulge doesn't mean that you guys get to make up what you think happened.

Extrapolating that I'm encouraging anything like this behavior is good is a radical misinterpretation of the text.

No, we are not, "in essence," talking about your relationship with EternalWinter. He was younger than you, but he was an adult. I am not making up what I think happened. I am reacting to the facts exactly as you have provided them. What you choose not to divulge is absolutely your business. It's what you have divulged that's confusing and troubling. The more you say, the more things get worse. This:

Well, he was one of the guys I was messing around with at the same time, probably one in six. One was probably twice my age, two or three were about my age.

Does not really jive with the image of a boy you that you helped, rescued from people who wanted him for his fake, of-age internet body by appreciating him for his true underaged soul so profoundly that he wanted to marry you. That's my interpretation of course, but how many reasonable others are there? I don't believe you're a predator just as I don't believe that is a decision made by a healthy-minded child, and I am even more convinced that the relationship was inappropriate.

I meant it when I said I potentially could have let all of that slide if it seemed like you understood why it was a fucked up situation, but that brings me to...

2. That you can't seem to make up your mind about whether it was a bad (illegal) thing to do or whether or not you feel bad about it, depending upon whom you're talking to:

In these quotes you sound introspective and penitent, admitting that you believe you could have been charged with a crime:

The fact that I didn't actually have sex with him doesn't excuse that I was involved and could have done damage of which I am not aware. I don't think so, but I can't say for sure. I think I did him some good and he said it was nice to have someone who valued him for who he was and not what he did or his persona.

I've drawn my lines much more clearly and this happened in my first few years on the internet when I didn't really know how to navigate.

Believe that or don't, I'm not here crowing about it being a great thing everybody should do. I'm listing it under "crime" and it's not something I'm proud about, but it is something that happened. To me it was an emotional and not a physical relationship, but was it still outside of what is considered lawful? Yes.

Do I think I did the kid some good? Yeah, actually I do. Do I think I could have been charged with a crime? Yep. If my daughter or son had a relationship with a person that much older, would I freak out? Hell yes.

In these you almost seem to gloat and forcefully deny any illegality:

Well, if I had a time machine, I'd go back and tell him this story, and he and I would laugh at you.

I wouldn't feel bad about either talking to him about it, spending time with him, or thinking that your opinion on the matter is pretty irrelevant to the conversation.

If you're going to treat me like some older lady predator who can't handle men her age, or treat him like your average 14 year old, we'd just laugh harder.

Okay. What was illegal about what I did, exactly, not from your imagination, but from reality. Please be clear.

Alarming, yes. Misguided, yes. Illegal, no.

We killed stuff together. I hugged him.

I couldn't have contacted his parents, he was fourteen times smarter than his parents. He'd say "Sorry mom, sorry dad." and be back online within 12 hours.

That does not equal crime in any state.

3. That despite dozens of repetitions of the idea that we will form our own opinions of you, "and that's okay" because you never claimed to be perfect, you have chosen to paint yourself as an unfairly persecuted protagonist and everyone who looks negatively on what you did as reactionary, frothing, bullies who are incapable of an emotionless analysis of the facts. (I'm bored of looking for quotes now.)

4. That you snapped at Lorilei, who is one of the kindest, best people here and was really being very reasonable. (I won't quote that either.)

I'm not telling you to change your behavior or to stop posting and I'm not suggesting that anyone with an opinion different to mine is wrong or that anyone should stop posting with you, though if I'm honest, I don't quite understand the thinking of anyone who is not a little bit appalled at what you did, though they are welcome to clarify. However, I would appreciate if you and others would stop mischaracterizing my thoughts and reactions as ill-informed, inconsistent, or hypocritical. I can find my way through a labyrinth of words well enough, thanks, and I reserve the right to my opinions.

Plenty of other people have given you calm, reasoned explanations for their reactions without calling you a rapist or a pedophile, so if we're so concerned about false narratives here, then it's time to put that one out to pasture.

 

[Wings]

I burned the duvet I caught my then husband cheating on, almost with him in it.

 

[Deafening]

http://up.xhamster.com/000/037/051/510_1000.jpg

Mature woman answers phone call from her mother and says, "Mom, I am not sleeping with my son. Who told you that anyway? If it was from the old lady that lives in the apartment next to me then she is lying to you. Yes, I went out to dinner last night with my son and we had a few drinks together. About 10:30 he left and went home to his wife. What do you mean his wife called you and wonders where he is?"

 

[RobDownSouth]

MUDS and talkers, never know what goes on in those rooms, I once planned a birthday party in one and everything thought we were having an orgy.

Good on you, Wings for the screen capture.

I am sure there is a lot more to this whole story but frankly it is history. Reci did wrong, she regrets it, that is that.

I always think of crimes of passion as murder, taking down people's sites, one friend's now ex wife gave away all his favorite clothes including a bespoke suit, during college I remember someone replacing lube with lidocaine, wiring the bedroom for sounds and then broadcasting the resultant non sex over pirate radio.

Any other good stories like that?

I've got a good one, but in the interests of board kumbahyah I shan't share any more of my dalliances.

 

[Disgustipated]

You know exactly jack shit about the young man in question or what did and did not happen. You're just thrilled to have a pitchfork to wave around. See I knew this young man and to call him anyone's victim would have him rolling in the fucking aisles.

Yeah, that's what's happening here

Did Bruce Campbell just fire three shots from a double-barrel shotgun?

It's BRUCE FUCKING CAMPBELL. He can do anything.

Did you see my user title before you posted this? I love that movie.

Yup. Great flick.

1. That you continued the sexual aspects of your online relationship after discovering he was underage.

Awesome post but you really could've stopped here.

 

[LazyAssReader]

I don't see where it says they were cyber-ing. Is that what involve means? I still I still don't see someone that age running a site like that back then, BDSM was out and about like it is now, it was an underground thing.5.6 speed was terrible back then.Shrugs,something doesn't is just not right about the circumstances way back then. But carry on people, it makes for interesting reading for an observer.

 

[Adre]

I've got a good one, but in the interests of board kumbahyah I shan't share any more of my dalliances.

Dude, you were getting laid a lot back then.

 

[Noor]

I burned the duvet I caught my then husband cheating on, almost with him in it.

When a former landlord could not stop drinking after numerous times in rehab his wife left him for someone else. He then sold their condo for about 10% of what it was worth so she wouldn't get any money from it. As soon as the divorce was final married the guy who was worth so much she had decided she didn't want anything from the divorce. These people were in their 60's!

 

[Wings]

I've got a good one, but in the interests of board kumbahyah I shan't share any more of my dalliances.

Yeah, save it for next week, I've already done your weekly dressing down.

 

[Noor]

I've got a good one, but in the interests of board kumbahyah I shan't share any more of my dalliances.

Oh don't be a tease, just change the names and the ages, and tell us!

 

[RobDownSouth]

Dude, you were getting laid a lot back then.

It was the times, and I was over-compensating.

Yeah, save it for next week, I've already done your weekly dressing down.

My Fan Club! :mush:

 

[Wings]

It was the times, and I was over-compensating.



My Fan Club! :mush:

I think I'm mean to you because I like you as a person and I know you can take it.

This statement doesn't apply to the rest of my words in this thread.

 

[Recidiva]

Look, I don't agree with the trolls, but I also don't agree with the characterization that the people who are upset simply don't have or didn't understand all of the facts.

I tried very hard to communicate in my original post in this thread why this has changed my opinion of you, Reci. I'm going to try again. Perhaps it's wasted effort, but it seems like other people are similarly curious as to what the BD is here, so I'm going to really try to be very clear this time. I will include quotes for handy reference, and please feel free to click back to their original appearance to verify their context.

My primary issues are:

1. That you continued the sexual aspects of your online relationship after discovering he was underage.

14 is underage in any state of the union if you're in your mid to late twenties. So, that's unpleasant (and possibly illegal). Also that you knowingly allowed other adults to continue interacting with him in a sexually explicit manner without their being aware of his real age. That's unpleasant. I don't wish to get into this too deeply, but I will agree that while it is not entirely unheard of to find a 14 year old boy discussing sex on the internet, this:



is a really strange reaction that I find a little concerning when I consider this in regards to his sexual roleplaying:



So being generous, we're talking about a 12 year old who was engaging in online BDSM sexual relationships with adults under the guise of adulthood, and your reaction upon learning about his age and his deception was to be impressed with his maturity. That's unpleasant.

And then:



No, we are not, "in essence," talking about your relationship with EternalWinter. He was younger than you, but he was an adult. I am not making up what I think happened. I am reacting to the facts exactly as you have provided them. What you choose not to divulge is absolutely your business. It's what you have divulged that's confusing and troubling. The more you say, the more things get worse. This:



Does not really jive with the image of a boy you that you helped, rescued from people who wanted him for his fake, of-age internet body by appreciating him for his true underaged soul so profoundly that he wanted to marry you. That's my interpretation of course, but how many reasonable others are there? I don't believe you're a predator just as I don't believe that is a decision made by a healthy-minded child, and I am even more convinced that the relationship was inappropriate.

I meant it when I said I potentially could have let all of that slide if it seemed like you understood why it was a fucked up situation, but that brings me to...

2. That you can't seem to make up your mind about whether it was a bad (illegal) thing to do or whether or not you feel bad about it, depending upon whom you're talking to:

In these quotes you sound introspective and penitent, admitting that you believe you could have been charged with a crime:





In these you almost seem to gloat and forcefully deny any illegality:







3. That despite dozens of repetitions of the idea that we will form our own opinions of you, "and that's okay" because you never claimed to be perfect, you have chosen to paint yourself as an unfairly persecuted protagonist and everyone who looks negatively on what you did as reactionary, frothing, bullies who are incapable of an emotionless analysis of the facts. (I'm bored of looking for quotes now.)

4. That you snapped at Lorilei, who is one of the kindest, best people here and was really being very reasonable. (I won't quote that either.)

I'm not telling you to change your behavior or to stop posting and I'm not suggesting that anyone with an opinion different to mine is wrong or that anyone should stop posting with you, though if I'm honest, I don't quite understand the thinking of anyone who is not a little bit appalled at what you did, though they are welcome to clarify. However, I would appreciate if you and others would stop mischaracterizing my thoughts and reactions as ill-informed, inconsistent, or hypocritical. I can find my way through a labyrinth of words well enough, thanks, and I reserve the right to my opinions.

Plenty of other people have given you calm, reasoned explanations for their reactions without calling you a rapist or a pedophile, so if we're so concerned about false narratives here, then it's time to put that one out to pasture.

I've sent a PM because explanation involves, technically, the themes of a minor in sexual situations.

 

[Phelia]

I think I'm mean to you because I like you as a person and I know you can take it.

This statement doesn't apply to the rest of my words in this thread.

Sometimes I want to be mean to him because I want to find out what my RobPutDownSouth™ nickname would be

 

[Saint Peter]

Feely Ya

 

[Noor]

I like this one

 

[slave_]

i wonder if this really happened.Twenty years ago,hmm there was just dial up.Everyone didn't have a computer as they now do. Internet was charged by the minute. I doubt back them parents were paying high rates for their kids to be online chatting and gaming. It doesn't ring true to me. Just a reader's opinion

Wrong! I've been on the internet since 1984. Elite universities, specific government agencies and telecommunication companies were all connected.

You connect through work and even logged in from home.

 

[VaticanAssassin]

There is a formula for that;

(Age/2)+7

 

[Saint Peter]

Age * 7 = DA

 

[LazyAssReader]

Wrong! I've been on the internet since 1984. Elite universities, specific government agencies and telecommunication companies were all connected.

You connect through work and even logged in from home.

I understand that,but we are speaking of a teenage kid. Therefore, if he connected through any of the above methods doubt hes fourteen. I was more or less speaking on the average home user back then