Budding dominatrix...any advice?

[BellaIsabella]

I am a young woman (26) who has recently gotten into domination at the suggestion of my husband who is one of the most submissive men you will ever meet. I would love to connect some advice from more experienced dominants.

Also what advice would you have for me?

 

[chatguy1122]

hi there

I'm just starting to be enjoyed being dominated by women. How are you liking it?

 

[BellaIsabella]

Well at first, it was a little weird, having always been a "vanilla" sex girl, but after I got used to it, being dominant is actually quite liberating, I think I have always been a closeted domme, I just never had the chance to express it with anyone.

 

[chatguy1122]

I just sent a PM as well.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I just sent a PM as well.

Of COURSE you did!

Bella, my comment is not meant to be critical in any way, but suggest a slightly different way of looking at what you're doing and calling yourself... I think "dominatrix" has very little to do with dominating a relationship, and everything to do with mutual enjoyment.

I took a look at your blog. On your top post you say that hubby has a laundry list of kinks he wants to try. You're okay with that. You'll "dominate" him according to his wishes.

I'm going out on a limb here, and suggesting that your guy is not "submissive." He's kinky. He's a bottom, and he knows what he wants-- not what YOU want. You are learning to top for him, and finding out how much pleasure there can be in doing unto!

 

[BeeBeestoy]

I am a young woman (26) who has recently gotten into domination at the suggestion of my husband who is one of the most submissive men you will ever meet. I would love to connect some advice from more experienced dominants.

Also what advice would you have for me?

Hi,
As a Kinky submissive, I have little advise to give you as a dominate individual. But I can tell you one thing. Be yourself, and do to him what first you want, second what he will allow. I know this probably doesn't help you much but its all I got for now.

 

[YourCaptor]

I am a young woman (26) who has recently gotten into domination at the suggestion of my husband who is one of the most submissive men you will ever meet. I would love to connect some advice from more experienced dominants.

Also what advice would you have for me?

Did we go to high school together? I remember some girl with your screen name for a name. Bio class, she/you had a best friend with huge boobs.

 

[gregor2001us]

If he truely wants to be submissive to you, then you can relax and discover what you enjoy about dominating him. Do not worry about his needs and desires, find yours. In fact, for the early stages, put his ideas on hold and tell him to be patient and wait before giving you ideas, unless you ask. And try not to do that even.

Akasha has great advice on her web site along these lines. The key is for you to feel confident and have fun. Don't worry about pausing because you can't think of anything. Instead use the pause to your advantage, it iwll build anticipation. Don't worry about whether he will like your ideas and techniques, he will. They may not be what he wants, but just your doing it becuase you are truned on by the idea and want to explore will dirve him crazy.

If, on the other hand, he knows what he wants and simply wants you to do things to spice up your love life, well, then tit for tat. Listen to his ideas and act them out.

Nothing wrong with either way, but it is better if you know up front so you are not confused by mixed signals.

Regards