O/L only compared to LD and meeting

[darebearstare]

is a LD relationship anything like an O/L realationship with a Master...i mean i know that you dont meet necessarily with an O/L r but i think it is just as hard....i am currently looking for an O/L Master and would like to know how much harder it is to have an O/L only compared to a LD.....i guess what im asking is: can online be just as satisfying as long distance with a Master.....i have a hubby and i would like to have an O/L Master to explore my BDSM/diaper play side......i would love to hear what everyone has to say about this....

 

[FurryFury]

Well, first of all I'm confused. It says on your profile you've already found an online master.

Secondly, I would have to say, no, online isn't just as good as long distance which might also have a large online component because with long distance you probably get some real life skin to skin time, at least now and then.

For me personally, online didn't work in the long run because when I give myself, I like to give all of me. I can't do that online, while being happily married. I had too many limits. That made me hate me too much. So I had to quit all that.

Others can do it, I'm sure. I'm just messed up in certain areas.

 

[darebearstare]

ty for bringing it to my attention i need to change that on my profile
as for your answer it brings up a good point about the physical aspect i just know that hubby will not let me do that without his consent and presence but i have these desires that i need to attempt to fulfill any ideas on how to do that

 

[darebearstare]

would it be better if i could talk on the phone or would that be even harder of a relationship to still not have physical contact

 

[FurryFury]

Honestly, for me talking on the phone isn't going to happen. I have kids. That is opening them up to overhearing stuff that I don't want them to hear. Not to mention phone talk or sex just isn't my thing, the expense and so on.

I could get by without physical contact, with my mind, heart and soul being in the mix if I could get past the fact that I can't give that person what I want to give them.

Others may not have those problems. In fact, they probably don't.

I will say that online at first worked very well for me. It was exciting and hopeful. I miss that buzz.

 

[caged_doll]

I think LD would be harder (for me) than online. I'm in a LD relationship now and every phone call I make to him reminds me that I'm not there. We visit, but the in between times are rough. With online, maybe there is not the expectation that it will result in the two of you being together. That just the online would be enough, that you know it's never going to merge into physical contact.

If it works for you, awesome. Our situations are very different so I'm probably not the best person to listen to. But I think if you are both very clear on your expectations and limitations of the relationship then you could have something mutually fulfilling.

 

[unregistered]

 

[StrayKat]

Even an online-only PYL/pyl relationship can get intense quickly considering the level of trust involved for this sort of play. Hiding such a relationship is not only difficult, it is exhausting and not without guilt. And, any outcome is often painful. When the online relationship ends, even if you've hidden it successfully, it is horribly painful.

It really depends on level of emotions involved. If you can take such online relationship just as casual "fun" it doesnt mean you cant get what you want out of it (unless you are prone to get emotionally attached nevertheless) and still keep it relatively safe and painless.

 

[ecstaticsub]

For me the difference between on-line only and LD is like night and day. Each one is fine for what it is. I never did on-line D/s just cybersex with on-line friends. Some were more than just the sex, others weren't. It got boring very quickly.

In my current relationship we went to phone calls almost immediately because there was that chemical connection right away. Now we talk much more by phone than by IM or email. We also get together a couple times a year. I think I would have had a very difficult time feeling like it is "real" and being able to submit through the rough times if I didn't at least occasionally get to feel his body holding me up close and in person.

 

[Etoile]

First time I've heard of a sub female DL. Honestly, lots of alarm bells are going off for me here. YMMV.