Agree I have had two ex girlfriends who really got into pleasing me not as a duty but got workup big time. Makes a gigantic differences in how exciting the experience is.
What exactly turns you on about your wife or girlfriend being with another man? Past or Present?
- Thread starter Nellie60
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zoso682001
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Absolutely , attitude is everything .
Sgts19
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You nailed it. The different way she moves, the look on her face, the noises and things she says all totally different than with me. I'm sure her fucking the same guy...me..for so many years gets sort of ho hum.
I've explained numerous times (on many threads) why, after 20 years of marriage, I decided to give my wife permission to occasionally be with other men. But I was NOT given the same permission.
So why did I make this offer without expecting it in return?
Put simply, as my wife neared 50 I felt her overall interest in sex was waning. Though I assumed some of it was related to menopause, I felt it might also be due to the simple fact that she's been with the same man (me!) >3000 times (2-3 times per wk for 35 years), without being with someone else. In other words, she was getting a bit bored of being with just Me. So I told her she was free to occasionally be with other men so long as she was honest with me about it and prioritized her safety and being discrete so our friends and family didn't find out.
So why not demand the same permission in return? Well, I’m as horny for my wife at 60 as I was at 30, so I don't NEED this sort of remedy. Plus my wife has doubts about my ability to have sex with another woman without becoming attached. Before we met, she had sex with lots of guys but fell in love with none of them. For me, on the other hand, she was my first and I quickly fell in love with her. We did break up for 9 months, during which I had other partners, but she was my first, then later became my wife. Of the two of us I’m the more clingy and romantic and I guess she thinks these are risk factors for my becoming attached to another woman after a one-night fling. So she made it clear that while she appreciated my giving her this sexual latitude, she was not comfortable giving it to me. And she needed assurance that I was not making my offer contingent on this.
As to the kinky aspect of all this… Yes, the idea of her being with someone else for no-strings-sex excites me, even more than the thought of my being with another woman. But here's the thing - being with my wife after being with another man would feel like I'm having sex with a different woman. Yes, she's the wonderful, beautiful wife she's always been, but there would be something different about her. The precise reasons elude me.
But I don’t put ANY pressure on her to do it. She has my sincerely and repeatedly expressed permission and that’s as far as I’ll go. If it happens, good for her! If not, well… I’m loving how just giving her permission to do so seems to have improved her overall sexual swagger.
So why did I make this offer without expecting it in return?
Put simply, as my wife neared 50 I felt her overall interest in sex was waning. Though I assumed some of it was related to menopause, I felt it might also be due to the simple fact that she's been with the same man (me!) >3000 times (2-3 times per wk for 35 years), without being with someone else. In other words, she was getting a bit bored of being with just Me. So I told her she was free to occasionally be with other men so long as she was honest with me about it and prioritized her safety and being discrete so our friends and family didn't find out.
So why not demand the same permission in return? Well, I’m as horny for my wife at 60 as I was at 30, so I don't NEED this sort of remedy. Plus my wife has doubts about my ability to have sex with another woman without becoming attached. Before we met, she had sex with lots of guys but fell in love with none of them. For me, on the other hand, she was my first and I quickly fell in love with her. We did break up for 9 months, during which I had other partners, but she was my first, then later became my wife. Of the two of us I’m the more clingy and romantic and I guess she thinks these are risk factors for my becoming attached to another woman after a one-night fling. So she made it clear that while she appreciated my giving her this sexual latitude, she was not comfortable giving it to me. And she needed assurance that I was not making my offer contingent on this.
As to the kinky aspect of all this… Yes, the idea of her being with someone else for no-strings-sex excites me, even more than the thought of my being with another woman. But here's the thing - being with my wife after being with another man would feel like I'm having sex with a different woman. Yes, she's the wonderful, beautiful wife she's always been, but there would be something different about her. The precise reasons elude me.
But I don’t put ANY pressure on her to do it. She has my sincerely and repeatedly expressed permission and that’s as far as I’ll go. If it happens, good for her! If not, well… I’m loving how just giving her permission to do so seems to have improved her overall sexual swagger.
Stargatefan78
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I want to eat her pussy after other man has cum inside your pussy.
Dreamer110
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That she's cumming home to me and all the benefits she brings.
For me, when my wife had a lover for 15 months it was seeing and hearing her enjoying herself with him and usually with me as well. Also seeing him get so excited at having me wife and her doing anything he wanted. Now, years later, I have suggested, as I can no longer fully satisfy her, that she rekindles her relationship with an old boyfriend we both met recently. I would be delighted for her to enjoy great sex and, provided she agreed, for him to have her in any way he wanted. Happy to discuss. Paul
Thanks for your interesting perspective.
Did you ever go ahead and fulfil that fantasy for you?
Indeed she will be different in bed, everything from making out, how she touches you, the type of sex she likes, all contaminated by someone else who has now experienced her.
Now that's a real turn on at least for me.
Just imagining her with her new lover would make my mind "jealous" but I guess that is part of the pleasure of receiving her back. It's not about being a cuckold but enhancing your sex life with her. Hearing the details and using that to improve your love making.
And if you are clingy and romantic as you say that would just make her return even more exciting.
irishblade
Dirty Little Secrets
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For me, she is a sexual being. I want her to receive the maximum amount of pleasure. I feel like she deserves it but as her husband, I swore to take care of her in every way. I’m not a great lover but I’m willing to do what it takes for her to receive the ultimate pleasure while we’re on this rock. (She thinks it’s weird so doesn’t seem keen on it Lol).
That reluctance if ever changes, which would be very hot to see by the way you describe her.
If you mean her being with another man, you would like to be a participant or just to watch her?
irishblade
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I have voyeuristic tendencies so I’m fine watching her get that pleasure. If she wanted me to play, I’d be more than willing to do that also
vandelayatx
Art Vandelay
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Watching would be great.
irishblade
Dirty Little Secrets
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Hey! Me first ;-) Lol
Most definitely watching. Does it turn you on more watching her pleasure another man or him pleasuring her. In other words her being reluctant and seduce by him or her being aroused by the mere touch of another man's cock.
vandelayatx
Art Vandelay
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Haha. I meant watching mine be with another man but I’d watch yours too lol
irishblade
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I’ve never experienced it at all. But I don’t think it would matter. If she’s on the prowl, that means she’s REALLY charged up sexually, and if she’s letting him lead, then she’s just wanting to take the pleasure. I’m good with either or both.
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irishblade
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Likewise, amigo ;-)
In reality I have never allowed this particular girlfriend have full sex or the other man seduce her at the time.
On this occasion I watched her finish another man with her hand and still think it was the hottest thing I have seen as it was live. It was the overall sense of everything around me at the the time that created an enormous amount of eroticism.
I wished I allowed her to go further and let him have his way with her. So its all fantasies and imagination now.
Vintagesurf25
YVR Bi & looking
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For about 10 years we were in an open marriage playing with others both together and apart. More of a Stag and Vixen arrangement. In fact, it was me who arranged who she would meet.
I tended to date one woman or man at a time while she enjoyed diverse men - most of my choosing - alone, in MMF and MMMF situations. I was present and participated about 2/3 of the time.
I loved both watching her and hearing her describe how adventurous/sensual she was on her date. I love her more than anything and I really enjoy either watching, or hearing about, her getting pleasured. She is vocal and squirts so watching her reach ever increasing levels of pleasure Is just a sublime compersion experience for me.
Similarly, licking her freshly fucked pussy and reclaiming her while she describes her dates is the most amazing feeling.
Compersion is a powerful emotion.
I tended to date one woman or man at a time while she enjoyed diverse men - most of my choosing - alone, in MMF and MMMF situations. I was present and participated about 2/3 of the time.
I loved both watching her and hearing her describe how adventurous/sensual she was on her date. I love her more than anything and I really enjoy either watching, or hearing about, her getting pleasured. She is vocal and squirts so watching her reach ever increasing levels of pleasure Is just a sublime compersion experience for me.
Similarly, licking her freshly fucked pussy and reclaiming her while she describes her dates is the most amazing feeling.
Compersion is a powerful emotion.
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irishblade
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For sure. That’s where I’m at in terms of fantasy. I’ve explained it to her (basically giving her a hall pass as long as we communicate beforehand) but she just doesn’t seem interested.
Yeah there's very few things as intensely hot as watching her in action in our situation simply due to the sheer intimacy they shared in the backseat of my car where it all took place.
Imagine hearing the intimate details of her encounters, that would sky-rocket your sex life.
There are plenty of lit members here that have done this and that but having a little bit of taste in this has been pretty hot enough for me.
Like yourself I would like to move to another level and see her ride another man!
irishblade
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She gets really uncomfortable talking about past experiences with me. Especially when I’m trying to get details for my pleasure Lol
Understand some of my past girlfriends didn't want to discuss their past whereas others got a kick out of it.
Frankly during make outs with some I encouraged some them to tell me about their past and what they liked sexually and if it happens it fricking so hot. Makes for fantastic sex! There's nothing so hot as seeing your girl so turned on.
irishblade
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Sounds awesome!
