Why are you back here?

[RawSilhouette]

Your emotional intelligence about this is very refreshing.

And yes, seeking trouble often if not always brings us trouble in return. Knowing and expecting that is half the battle I suppose.

Your approach to coming here, tip toeing around the idea and negotiating with yourself about the pros and cons of clicking that login button is eerily similar behavior what addicts do before resuming their substance of choice. This place can be addictive.

But knowing and recognizing the pitfalls and then strategizing how to handle them is the best way to maintain a healthy relationship with the place and the good people here. Knowing what and who to avoid is key and it can be done.

How do you know who and what to avoid? I’d be interested in a “forum tutorial” detailing just that. Any advice? Or does it just require experience?

 

[mrdeeds7625]

My reason for returning is sometimes hard for me to put into words.

There is a line in the Matchbox 20 song Push that goes "I don't know if I've ever been really loved by a hand that's touched me", and that resonates with myself very much. At the risk of turning this into a therapy session, I have never not been cheated on by anyone that I had a strong fondness for or loved, it has happened at some point every single time.
As I get older the passage of time has worked wonders at enabling me to move on, especially after being married for 20 years. I learned to put it away, suppressed it or whatever to the point that things are where they are and they're good to point and I'm not going to change anything regarding the status quo.
In the back of my mind linger the echoes of those lyrics and they push me to see if I can make such a connection with a woman that I can feel she really "gets" me, or has an affinity for me. I'm not looking for love but rather a certain feeling of worth. I'm not looking for anything offline but just to know that my personality or my being could make such an impact on someone would be so satisfying. By keeping things out of the physical realm it becomes more special because instead of the physical senses the mental side of things would have to shine through and make that connection.

Another reason I came back deals with how I was never a "ladies man", I was the nerd who never got the girl. Tons of rejections into my early 20's took more a toll on my views of self worth, than even realized. The rejections left me wondering if I was ever gonna be with a woman who for lack of better words was "hot" in my eyes. Then like magic I had a flurry of activity in my early 20s gave me reason to believe that I could find a woman with the look I wanted. Each time the looks were overshadowed by a less than Steller personality. These events took place in a small period of time before I met the woman I would marry. (which brought a lot of the same results in the first few years of the marriage.)

Here I am 20 something years later and I'm searching for someone out of my league again. I know I'm not the most handsome guy on the block and certainly don't have a chiseled anything but I still have dreams and desires.

So that my dear litster are the two driving forces that bring me back once again, each time I've returned both seem more unobtainable than the previous visit. Have I found success here? Yes. I absolutely did with someone who shall remain nameless and guess who screwed that one up? I'll give you two guesses and a hint...it wasn't her.

 

[LostHorizon]

How do you know who and what to avoid? I’d be interested in a “forum tutorial” detailing just that. Any advice? Or does it just require experience?

I have often thought of providing some sort of subscription based Lit tutorial. Charge users tuition for different classes focused on Lit Forum themes.

Or maybe host a podcast. With all the knowledge and experience I have accumulated over the years, there has to be a way to monetize it.

 

[RawSilhouette]

I have often thought of providing some sort of subscription based Lit tutorial. Charge users tuition for different classes focused on Lit Forum themes.

Or maybe host a podcast. With all the knowledge and experience I have accumulated over the years, there has to be a way to monetize it.

Lol. My vote is for the podcast. I’m a sucker for voices. And I really would like to learn .

 

[LostHorizon]

Lol. My vote is for the podcast. I’m a sucker for voices. And I really would like to learn .

I’m a sucker for voices too.

I wonder how much I can get for a subscription to my podcast?

 

[MaturemanAJ]

Always was a story reader before which I truly enjoy. Found the forum this time and if I was to leave it would be because of the forum.
So I find myself here less and less each day and have gone back to stories.
I guess chatting in person is way more civil than online.
.

 

[bws1]

I come back to feel alive and not be nervous about being "kink-shamed", which my wife does frequently...

 

[SeniorToYou]

What you said is true "We want to be seen, heard, known, understood." The times I log on to Literotica are few and far between and I have closed an account a time or two only to open up a new one. I am hoping someday that I will meet someone here that will see, hear, know and understand me and I will do the same for them.

 

[Ratchetman1982]

I took a hiatus, but missed the back and forth banter of some of the great members here.

 

[SpicyBean99]

To be a little brat and cause mayhem

Joke.

Initially I found the website whilst looking for some smut. I began investing serious amounts of time writing my own stories and then finally decided to make an account. I now have three published stories here and hopefully many more to come.

I find amusement and fun in the threads too. My own being my safe space to share, play and have fun exploring my kinks!

It’s also fun to meet new people

 

[Lovethatbigass]

I keep thinking maybe I'll find the one. I know this place isn't a dating site. How can anybody who is kinky go to a regular dating site? And I'm not extreme, so I don't fit. It would be nice to make a friend, maybe an online lover and someone who understands me.

 

[Coconutty70]

So I’m not the only one then! Yeah, I dip in and out. Each time is probably slightly different, the reasons differ and tend to be:

• I like the stories, they make a change from video porn, which I view less and less these days.
• Every time, I think I might strike up a hot, sexy online relationship with a likeminded beautiful woman but it’s NEVER HAPPENED… sorry, did I shout that? But i come back again like a sucker and still never find that elusive person.
• It’s a way to find good material to masturbate to while still retaining a modicum of good taste… or good quality.
• Some of our resident exhibitionists are off the scale in terms of of real, sexy people doing real, sexy stuff… there’s no fakery, and that’s HOT! Porn sites can f*ck off, frankly.
• It’s quite an intelligent place (usually) and I find intelligence sexy too
• This time around, I have tried to engage with the forums much more… I think it’s because I want to connect more, and I’ve been finding the threads fun, sexy and sometimes really interesting! I don’t think I realised it before.
• The forums are full of really open and honest people and the quality of the content is more engaging than other dumbed-down places I’ve browsed through. There are a lot of really hardcore guru people though, so sometimes it’s hard to penetrate through because there are clearly people that know one another inside and out… especially on the mega-threads where I’d feel really awkward to turn up on.
• This time I’ve tried to message people privately, but usually it’s like shouting into the wind, so I’m properly stumped on that. The non-reply thing has made me feel really awful once or twice, so it puts me off making an effort. I wish people were more responsive… obv a massive difference between m/f experiences on this, I would think.
• So yeah… connecting I think for me this time… have a go, fail miserably, go and do something else, and then I’ll be back to see if next time around it might be different!

That’s my dipping in and out report! I even made it with bullet points! Do I get a gold star? If I get a gold star, do I also get a sexual favour?

 

[Susurration]

I've never actually left, so I can't have come back, so to speak. What keeps me coming back are the interactions. This is my creative online space, my place to forget about my real life stress, or write about them to relieve the pressure, and my location for talking about sex and living vicariously. I've been here a long time. I've seen many friends come and go and I've seen many old favourite threads slowly fade away into obscurity, but there are always new topics to explore and new people to meet, so it's about balancing the safety of the known with the risk of the new. Also, somebody has to keep the old, original UK Playground thread alive by posting in it now and again.

 

[Mo_Bandy]

Boredom

 

[MrGoatee]

Because finding a spark and making someone smile is worth the effort

 

[amigayorbi]

Back here, as I need a sexy woman, to have uninhibited chats and conversations with!

 

[Pad_Foot]

The search is over ?
Soulmates found one another !!

Yay !!!

It’s possible folks!!

Keep hunting !

 

[curvyjae]

I have no clue why I come here because I try to be a good girl but my husband has the emotional cap abilities of a 3 year old so I’m unfulfilled I suppose.

 

[hardbiker82]

Yes, another one that keeps coming back. It usually starts cause I'm reading a good story on Lit and then can't resist the urge to see who's online and see if anyone fun to chat with or conversation to join in.

Sometimes, I go a couple days away and sometimes, I'm gone half a year. But, it's always the erotica stories that I love to hear.

 

[athelticguy04]

That's a million dollar question. I'm starting to wonder why myself

 

[IrreverendBoob]

I come back occasionally because I've had some really good connections on here; counterintuitive to the point of the website, but most of them have been quite platonic connections, with perhaps some flirtation back and forth, but rarely have the connections I've found truly rewarding gotten into truly explicit territory. Its not that I object to that, of course- I did deliberately come to LitEROTICA, after all. It's just been my experience that most of the people whom have offered the deepest and most engrossing conversations lead us to simply become distracted by that side of things, so the sexy side gets a bit left behind in the midst of connecting over other mutual interests.

 

[LeinadVirgo]

I come back for a distraction from reality

 

[AllAmericanMale]

My fans missed me.

 

[KyleR215]

Toe cheese

 

[Redcraze1956]

I'm back because, well I guess because sometimes life gets boring and you need to add a little spice. So here I am back in the spice cabinet....

Good analogy! Most spice cabinets (mine included) are crammed with half-empty containers that have been mouldering away in the corner for years.