I don't think you should use formulas at all. I think you should sink yourself into the particular scene and feel and see everything you can conjure up and put it into the best words and phrases possible.
I don't. A point can emerge from a pantsed story, and even more to the point, a point can be the impetus for pantsing a story around it.
And here's a decision you, @DeMont, might think about. Are you writing erotica (stories about sex) or are you writing fiction with a lot of hot sex scenes? Both are absolutely legitimate, and I think a healthy majority of writers in AH are in the latter camp, where plot and character are paramount. But, since you're new and are doing us all the tremendous favor of asking our opinions, maybe you'd find this post interesting.
Unless it's "simple erotica."
Not to beat a dead horse here, but to whom were you addressing this?
But they can use different words to evoke the experience.
Hear, hear!!!!! Yaayyy!!!
Hey, men feel emotions during sex as well. They range from triumph to performance anxiety. Well, I say range...
They have the emotional range of feral alley cats.
Well, when it's written for this particular woman, by this particular woman, it's physical feelings, physical feelings, physical feelings. This includes the physical feeling of surrender. Whether it's a feeling or an emotion is a topic for another thread. Stay tuned.
Speak for yourself.
Not sure how true this is. It feels like an olden-times stereotype. Women can enjoy the physicality of sex and men can enjoy the emotional side. It’s sad when we feel that people have to have allotted roles and rules around what is and is not accessible to them.
I got scolded in the comments for letting a male character cry in his room when he got shot down by his love interest. Apparently some of our readers disagree.
Well, I never enjoyed sex with a man, physically or emotionally. I've had them tell me it felt good fucking me. No man ever said it was a religious experience, though. My wife, Jo, and I go to church in bed often!
Assuming that all the women here are actually men, I'd say there's very little difference.
I’ve had similar reactions elsewhere. Seems like a lot of readers of erotica believe in men having mental health issues due to suppressing natural emotions as they are “unmanly” FFS.
I’ve enjoyed the company of men and women. It’s different in some ways, kind of the same in others.
I made this comment earlier, but thinking since, I've got to walk it back a bit.
Totally disagree. Unless you are reading stuff written by the emotional equivalent of an eleven year old.
Some days I feel compelled to seceded from my gender due to second hand cringe. They'd probably be pleased to be rid of me, in any case. I guess that's the only reason I've stayed.
Sorry to sound dense, but. Simple erotica differs how????
Time is a flat circle. Any thread that, conceptually, has been done over and over, and which we will do over and over, you have to drink.
Shit. We'll never be sober again.
