Cock Talk

[Taegul]

MEN:

What is your worst experience of getting hit in the balls?

My life growing up basically revolved around playing baseball. I stopped wearing a cup after Little League. I was pitching a game in high school when the batter hit a line drive right back at me. Using my glove would have been too easy, so I caught it with my balls. OUCH! The ball plopped down right in front of me and I basically scooped it up, threw to first, and continued rotating around and down to the ground....all in one motion. Coach came out to check on me but with a very loud voice so the whole crowd could hear, I said something like, "I'm alright, just let me walk it off!" The funny part was I intentionally cracked my voice for the first half like a boy going through puberty, and let my voice transition to normal towards the end. I got great laughs from the crowd, but it definitely sounded like the women were laughing the loudest.

You're God Damn right I got that prick out at first.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I am in to Femme Domme, though

You're God Damn right I got that prick out at first.

You mean the guy who hit the ball(s), right?
Not your own prick?
This is a story of true heroism under fire!

 

[Taegul]

You mean the guy who hit the ball(s), right?
Not your own prick?
This is a story of true heroism under fire!

Of course I meant the batter.

My prick only hits home runs. Grand slams.

 

[AnomalyLady]

WOMEN:

Do you get hit in the crotch as often as us guys do?
I have never gotten hit in the crotch, what the heck? hahah

Doesn’t it hurt a little?
See above

The vagina is obviously much more robust than our dainty little nutballs, but what was your worst experience of being hit in the cooch-la-rue?
Ok fine, I wasn't hit but I was a gymnast. Falling on the beam. Ugh. Your leg and vagina and soul are bruised for way too long.

Do you find guys getting hit in the balls as funny as other guys do?
Yes, men deserve to be hit in the balls more. (I'm too tired, I don't know).

What would you like to know about our testicles?
Just a couple. Do they shrink? Do they ever get bigger? How do they feel when cold?

 

[hotwords229_A]

Just a couple. Do they shrink? Do they ever get bigger? How do they feel when cold?

Yes they shrink.
Yes they get bigger.
They shrink when they get cold and sometimes, when very cold, they feel tight, like the skin around them has shrunken to a point where they no longer fit.

That first wave that soaks your shorts when walking into the ocean is a rough one. It’s better to just jump in head first.

 

[munch2much]

Just a couple. Do they shrink? Do they ever get bigger? How do they feel when cold?

I’m not sure they shrink per se, but the scrotum is designed to regulate their temperature and so brings them closer to the body (by constructing) as it gets colder, which certainly makes them look smaller. I don’t recall noticing them when I’ve been cold, myself.

 

[peekingone]

WOMEN:

Do you get hit in the crotch as often as us guys do?
I have never gotten hit in the crotch, what the heck? hahah

Doesn’t it hurt a little?
See above

The vagina is obviously much more robust than our dainty little nutballs, but what was your worst experience of being hit in the cooch-la-rue?
Ok fine, I wasn't hit but I was a gymnast. Falling on the beam. Ugh. Your leg and vagina and soul are bruised for way too long.

Do you find guys getting hit in the balls as funny as other guys do?
Yes, men deserve to be hit in the balls more. (I'm too tired, I don't know).

What would you like to know about our testicles?
Just a couple. Do they shrink? Do they ever get bigger? How do they feel when cold?

Of course you have questions

 

[lavendersilk]

NUT CHECK isn’t just roll call at the Asylum.

I've watched this video three times and it surprises me everytime.

One of the most difficult things about being a guy is protecting your nuts.

*takes notes*

No matter what it is that’s flying through the air, it is, inevitably, headed right for our balls.

When a kid climbs in your lap, they step right on your testicles—every time.
When the dog jumps up on the couch, their rear paw crushes your manbag—every time.

Same for me but boobs.

Our clackers are a literal magnet for all things in motion.

*makes a note to use "clackers" more often in vocabulary*

WOMEN:
Do you get hit in the crotch as often as us guys do?

I've been hit in the crotch a few times. It's not fun.

Doesn’t it hurt a little?

Yep!

The vagina is obviously much more robust than our dainty little nutballs, but what was your worst experience of being hit in the...

The worst thing that has ever transpired down there(maybe this isn't quite the equivalent of a knee to the groin) I was on monkey bars and... yeah. You get the idea...

cooch-la-rue?

*makes a note to never use that in my vocabulary*

Do you find guys getting hit in the balls as funny as other guys do?

MAaaaybeee.

What would you like to know about our testicles?

I'm good.

 

[TotallyNotTaegul]

WOMEN:

Do you get hit in the crotch as often as us guys do?

All. The. Time. My vagina is a magnet for every airborne object within 20 feet.

Doesn’t it hurt a little?

Used to, but years of abuse have turned that area into hardened leather.

The vagina is obviously much more robust than our dainty little nutballs, but what was your worst experience of being hit in the cooch-la-rue?

I went bowling once. Once. Talk about a gutter ball...

Do you find guys getting hit in the balls as funny as other guys do?

You have no idea. Ok, you probably do have an idea.

What would you like to know about our testicles?

Nothing. Ignorance is bliss.

 

[AnomalyLady]

All. The. Time. My vagina is a magnet for every airborne object within 20 feet.

Used to, but years of abuse have turned that area into hardened leather.

I went bowling once. Once. Talk about a gutter ball...

You have no idea. Ok, you probably do have an idea.

Nothing. Ignorance is bliss.

What. The. Fk.

 

[Taegul]

What. The. Fk.

It's probably best to ignore "her".

 

[MindYaBitness]

NUT CHECK isn’t just roll call at the Asylum.

One of the most difficult things about being a guy is protecting your nuts.

No matter what it is that’s flying through the air, it is, inevitably, headed right for our balls.

When a kid climbs in your lap, they step right on your testicles—every time.
When the dog jumps up on the couch, their rear paw crushes your manbag—every time.

Our clackers are a literal magnet for all things in motion.

WOMEN:

Do you get hit in the crotch as often as us guys do?

No, no one's aiming for it, if anything my boobs are the always in the way!

Doesn’t it hurt a little?

Not really, see, god/evolution/mother nature did us a kindness and put all of those important bits inside, and that really sensitive spot, well, it's protected so well that I hear some gentleman have a difficulty finding it!

The vagina is obviously much more robust than our dainty little nutballs, but what was your worst experience of being hit in the cooch-la-rue?

Straight down on the bar of my bike. That's a pain that resonates through your bones!

If I may add that there was a bit of time that I could possibly commiserate with guys. For guidelines sake, I was a late bloomer of 18. No one tells us that when breast buds start to grow they hurt like you would not believe, and you're not used to them, so brushing against your desk as you lean over to get a pencil out, or getting hit with a dodge ball, is an excruciating, tear inducing horror, that resonates through your entire body, like the winds been knocked out of you but you can somehow still breath. It's awful!

Do you find guys getting hit in the balls as funny as other guys do?

When it's an accident, yes. On purpose, not so much.

What would you like to know about our testicles?

Why are you guys ways using them in terms that denote bravery, when they're the most cowardly part of the human body????

 

[hotwords229_A]

I've watched this video three times and it surprises me everytime.

I did that exact move a few weeks ago. It’s insane how easy it is to hit your nuts bu accident.

Straight down on the bar of my bike. That's a pain that resonates through your bones!

You had a boys bike?
I always wondered why boys bikes didn’t have the angled bar and the girls have the straight bar. Seems totally backwards to me. But you’re the second woman to have a bike incident.
So maybe ALL bikes should be girls bikes!

Why are you guys ways using them in terms that denote bravery, when they're the most cowardly part of the human body????

I’ve been saying this for years. “You’re a real pussy” should be a compliment and “it takes balls to retreat like that” should be a put down.

 

[MrMakersMark]

Why are you guys ways using them in terms that denote bravery, when they're the most cowardly part of the human body????

I know the answer to this, or what is most commonly accepted as the reason for this.
But I digress.
Your question was funny.
No need to examine it further.

 

[hotwords229_A]

My vagina is a magnet for every airborne object within 20 feet.

I would think that cleavage would catch anything before it got to the vagina.
I mean, you could stand under those in a rainstorm!

 

[MindYaBitness]

I did that exact move a few weeks ago. It’s insane how easy it is to hit your nuts bu accident.

You had a boys bike?
I always wondered why boys bikes didn’t have the angled bar and the girls have the straight bar. Seems totally backwards to me. But you’re the second woman to have a bike incident.
So maybe ALL bikes should be girls bikes!

I’ve been saying this for years. “You’re a real pussy” should be a compliment and “it takes balls to retreat like that” should be a put down.

I was the youngest, only girl in a family of boys. The bikes were hand-me-downs. I got really skilled at sanding and spray painting them Barbie pink or Strawbery Shortcake red, or my first & personal favorite, Rainbow Brite themed!

* edited to add that lady's bikes are built that way because once upon a time society forced us to wear skirts or be labeled harlots. So, the bend is leave room for skirts/bloomers/culottes

 

[lavendersilk]

I was the youngest, only girl in a family of boys. The bikes were hand-me-downs. I got really skilled at sanding and spray painting them Barbie pink or Strawbery Shortcake red, or my first & personal favorite, Rainbow Brite themed!

I would love to see those! My favorites.

 

[ScarletDaisy]

NUT CHECK isn’t just roll call at the Asylum.

One of the most difficult things about being a guy is protecting your nuts.

No matter what it is that’s flying through the air, it is, inevitably, headed right for our balls.

When a kid climbs in your lap, they step right on your testicles—every time.
When the dog jumps up on the couch, their rear paw crushes your manbag—every time.

Our clackers are a literal magnet for all things in motion.

WOMEN:

Do you get hit in the crotch as often as us guys do?

Not that I can recall...

Doesn’t it hurt a little?

I think that would depend upon the strength of the hit - are we talking a playful smack or getting hit with a baseball?

The vagina is obviously much more robust than our dainty little nutballs, but what was your worst experience of being hit in the cooch-la-rue?

I remember hitting the bar on the bike one time -- that was painful, but probably more pelvic bone pain, tbh.

Do you find guys getting hit in the balls as funny as other guys do?

I don't find it amusing, but I do sometimes wonder if it really hurts that much....

What would you like to know about our testicles?

I can't think of a thing.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I don't find it amusing, but I do sometimes wonder if it really hurts that much....

It’s difficult to describe, but pain is a good word for it.
Maybe “ache” is better?

But yeah, it does hurt that much. It’s one of the best ways to take a guy down.

In a defense situation: Eyes, Throat, Balls.

 

[BongoGal]

* edited to add that lady's bikes are built that way because once upon a time society forced us to wear skirts or be labeled harlots. So, the bend is leave room for skirts/bloomers/culottes

I’ve never understood how pants on women seemed in any way more sexual than a skirt or dress.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I’ve never understood how pants on women seemed in any way more sexual than a skirt or dress.

Seems the exact opposite. You can get under a dress or skirt, but pants are much more in the way.

I much prefer pants OFF a woman.

 

[floridakevin]

Yeah, I have one. Once upon a time I had a really nice top. It was pink and it had yellow daisies on the front. I really liked that top. It was one of my favorites. One day, while I was pouring juice in a baby bottle, I spilled some on my favorite top. I freaked out. So I quickly filled the kitchen sink with hot, soapy water and soaked it for like an hour. Then, without thinking, I put it in the dryer... not realizing the danger I put it in. About a half later I took it out of the dryer and the first thing I noticed was....

My favorite top had shrunk!

The End.

I knew from an early age not to put anything in the dryer unless it was labeled "dryer safe " I personally have no such label !

 

[BongoGal]

I don't find it amusing, but I do sometimes wonder if it really hurts that much....

I remember some kid in my gym class getting whipped in the crotch with a rolled-up towel. It hurt so much that he threw up.

 

[hotwords229_A]

I remember some kid in my gym class getting whipped in the crotch with a rolled-up towel. It hurt so much that he threw up.

He’s a fucking Legend!

 

[ScarletDaisy]

I’ve never understood how pants on women seemed in any way more sexual than a skirt or dress.

Apparently the idea of women's legs... separating was quite scandalous.