Sex & Shenanigans

[MrMakersMark]

What about mid morning coffee break, lunch break, mid afternoon snack, occasional work late breaks?

I mean… there has to be an acronym for those people.

Oh, you mean PURVESS?
Common pronunciation: ▪︎PERVES▪︎

Persistant Uncontrollable Repeated Vaginal and Erectile Sexual Stimulators.


Yeah, its much more common than ADHSLSHSHTHAGAHDLB.

Comes in various stages and severities.


I've heard the females with bad cases will resort to hairbrushes, vibrating massagers toothbrushes and the water nozzle with the hose and alternating pressure patterns that is supposed to be for your back? You know which one I am talking Bout? Yeah that one.... right up the snooch. They see cock and vulva formations in the clouds like the devout see Jesus in them. They squint their eyes in photos and a phallus appears, so it effects how the brain absorbs information.

And the guys?
Mostly they just abuse themselves, putting their contraption into anything that can produce friction and then just thump away all day and start ejaculating. It wont stop until they start pumping out knee cartilage.

Some will even take up yoga to develop the flexibility to self-fellate...and to be in a room with a dozen pairs of yoga pants.

Or there is allegedly a Doc in Equador who will just surgically remove a rib for you.
Reasonable rates...or so I'm told.


Yeah..

It's sad. Poor buggers.

 

[morelikeasong]

Good morning you sexy degenerates!

https://media2.giphy.com/media/vwGtM2p0b4Cn6/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe91afd2aae836316cca405c296d43209da67c2ed939&ep=v1_user_favorites&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

Good morning!

 

[morelikeasong]

FML I hate headaches.

How are you feeling today, babe? Hopefully sleep helped

 

[crazychemgirl]

How are you feeling today, babe? Hopefully sleep helped

Meh … about the same unfortunately

 

[UnquietDreams]

Meh … about the same unfortunately

God, I hate it when a headache holds on. It's like waking up the morning after a party and finding someone crashed in the bathtub when you want to take a shower. "I slept. You are supposed to be gone!"

 

[MrMakersMark]

God, I hate it when a headache holds on. It's like waking up the morning after a party and finding someone crashed in the bathtub when you want to take a shower. "I slept. You are supposed to be gone!"

Morning feelings.

My favorite?

Waking up with memory snapshots of the heroic and legendary things you did...and all the Vag slain....feeling those deeds fade away into unaccessible memory.

And you've nothing to show for it all except for the feeling of an invisible dwarfs thumb in your neck because you folded the pillow in your sleep like a jackass.
.
...


And Lit has already told you twice "Oops we have a problem"




So awesome.

 

[MrMakersMark]

 

[vagrantx]

and all the Vag slain

oh no. am dead. pls halp.
https://media.tenor.com/GHDZ0NxSPp4AAAAM/cat-fall-ground-drop-oof-oop-die-play-dead.gif

 

[UnquietDreams]

oh no. am dead. pls halp.
https://media.tenor.com/GHDZ0NxSPp4AAAAM/cat-fall-ground-drop-oof-oop-die-play-dead.gif

https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExeTUwaHV1cnRjeml4bGN2bGMwcTlpM3FpOXhsYmJwYXdpNDN4enB1aCZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/7OWP0kYybTU6lXhj6M/giphy.gif

 

[vagrantx]

https://media1.giphy.com/media/v1.Y2lkPTc5MGI3NjExeTUwaHV1cnRjeml4bGN2bGMwcTlpM3FpOXhsYmJwYXdpNDN4enB1aCZlcD12MV9pbnRlcm5hbF9naWZfYnlfaWQmY3Q9Zw/7OWP0kYybTU6lXhj6M/giphy.gif

romantic death? necrophiliac alert!! wee woo wee woo

 

[Deleted member 6592667]

https://media2.giphy.com/media/vwGtM2p0b4Cn6/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe91afd2aae836316cca405c296d43209da67c2ed939&ep=v1_user_favorites&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

Good morning!

How YOU doin?

 

[Deleted member 6592667]

Hey fellow hoes

 

[morelikeasong]

How YOU doin?

https://media1.giphy.com/media/3o7bu6fcCCFEbBQKXK/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe91uhbaaovnoi5r6slwpgosdh8rle73zux9rmu02pl5&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

 

[Deleted member 6592667]

https://media1.giphy.com/media/3o7bu6fcCCFEbBQKXK/giphy.gif?cid=9b38fe91uhbaaovnoi5r6slwpgosdh8rle73zux9rmu02pl5&ep=v1_gifs_search&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

Prince is my spirit guide.
https://media0.giphy.com/media/26AHQAjhG1QINh7GM/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952vzgr8e2tesqych6g7pee5fjovsbh4lk0j96t1hi6&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

 

[FormerAllStar2]

Prince is my spirit guide.
https://media0.giphy.com/media/26AHQAjhG1QINh7GM/giphy.gif?cid=6c09b952vzgr8e2tesqych6g7pee5fjovsbh4lk0j96t1hi6&ep=v1_internal_gif_by_id&rid=giphy.gif&ct=g

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/DexVqL9V4AAF9uD.jpg:large
Sorry to jump in. Your post made me think of this and laugh.

 

[MisterAlice]

Ok question for the masses…

Is there a physical body thing that someone has which would be a deal breaker for you?

Well, that is why those wank from home programs are so successful… wait… I meant… work from home. Yes… not… well… you know what I meant…

During Covid, some people confused the two concepts.

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/scaachikoul/jeffrey-toobin-zoom-incident-new-yorker

 

[Whiskeyjack]

She's got a weird bit of heterochromia and her expression looks like she wants to cut a bitch. But she's really a sweetheart.

 

[MindYaBitness]

Hey fellow hoes
View attachment 2481217

Funny you should be thinking that. I just had a conversation about the efficiency of ending a fight by taking my top off. Works every time!

 

[MisterAlice]

Funny you should be thinking that. I just had a conversation about the efficiency of ending a fight by taking my top off. Works every time!

Now that is not fair at all.

 

[BrendaBear]

Funny you should be thinking that. I just had a conversation about the efficiency of ending a fight by taking my top off. Works every time!

I love this... it isn't "that's when the gloves come off" it's "that's when the top comes off".

 

[MisterAlice]

I think my brain would go to mush as the blood drained out and went somewhere else.

 

[Qky75]

I think my brain would go to mush as the blood drained out and went somewhere else.

It's a trap!!

 

[MisterAlice]

That's the kind of trap I wouldn't mind falling into.

 

[MrMakersMark]

Funny you should be thinking that. I just had a conversation about the efficiency of ending a fight by taking my top off. Works every time!

Not all of us have your...ummm.. show-stoppers.

When guys yank shirts off it goes the other way.

 

[MisterAlice]

I guess we could drop our pants, but that wouldn't have the same effect, either. Men and women are built different in so many ways.