Puns

[done_got_old]

I lift weights only on Saturday and Sunday because Monday to Friday are weak days.

 

[mnbreastluver]

There are people who work at the Microsoft Office office.

 

[done_got_old]

I really wanted a camouflage shirt, but I couldn't find one.

 

[mnbreastluver]

I tried to tell the doctor the long story about how I hurt my thumb. It was all disjointed.

 

[done_got_old]

Exchanging salt-water recipes is a case of the brined leading the brined.

 

[Ask For More]

Exchanging salt-water recipes is a case of the brined leading the brined.

I think they are desperate to find a cure.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you shot through a long line of deer with only one bullet, you would get the most buck for your bang.

 

[done_got_old]

I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.

 

[mnbreastluver]

In Australia people lining up to eat barbecue can themselves be referred to as a barbie queue.

 

[done_got_old]

People are choosing cremation over traditional burial. It shows that they are thinking out of the box.

 

[mnbreastluver]

My math teacher called me average.
That was so mean.

 

[done_got_old]

I tinted my hair today. It was the highlight of my day.

 

[done_got_old]

I slept like a log whilst on night duty and I was axed when I woke up.

 

[Ask For More]

My math teacher called me average.
That was so mean.

Did you custard pi him?

 

[mnbreastluver]

Kanye should hold a event for Dyslexia Awareness in Kenya.

 

[done_got_old]

Why did the cook spill his soup? Because there was a leek in the pot.

 

[done_got_old]

I always believed my body was a prison for me. I was right, in biology I learned it was made of cells.

 

[HBergeron]

Why was the hot pepper too nosy?

Because she was 'Jalapeno' business.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Sad porn would be a tear jerker

 

[done_got_old]

Can new shock absorbers make a car easier to control? Of course - it goes without

 

[mickyp123]

A farmer friend of mine lost the left side of his body in a combine harvester, he's all right now.

 

[mickyp123]

When chemists die they barium

 

[mickyp123]

haunted french pancakes give me the crepes

 

[mickyp123]

A thief who pinched a calender got twelve months

 

[mickyp123]

A will is a dead giveaway