Mom I’d Like to… er… Talk To

[EmilyMiller]

Sorry. My mistake. Carry on

Didn’t mean to be snippy. Was late and I was sick. Sorry.

Em

 

[SimonDoom]

Purity Ball

What a great idea for the name of a Literotica story character.

 

[Djmac1031]

What a great idea for the name of a Literotica story character.

You're more than welcome to use it.

 

[SimonDoom]

I'm not a mom, but when I was married I gave tons of advice to the mom of my kids. Does that qualify me?

Heck, I continued to give advice after the divorce, but that didn't go over so well.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I'm not a mom, but when I was married I gave tons of advice to the mom of my kids. Does that qualify me?

Heck, I continued to give advice after the divorce, but that didn't go over so well.

I think I’m good, hun. But I’m sure she appreciated it

Em

 

[SimonDoom]

I think I’m good, hun. But I’m sure she appreciated it

Em

Em, you're more diplomatic than she was.

 

[RachelPost]

I just saw this thread and I would like to kick my 2 cents in. As a mom, I always want what's best for my kids. I can be a mama bear, and if I think you mean harm to them, I will not be gentle. Sexually, sometimes life would get so busy that sex had to be scheduled, yes put on the calendar. Or timed for after they went to bed.

Now, understand this was prior to the @#$@$&* doing, let's just say he could have gone to prison. That sort of explains part of why I prefer intimacy with women.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I just saw this thread and I would like to kick my 2 cents in. As a mom, I always want what's best for my kids. I can be a mama bear, and if I think you mean harm to them, I will not be gentle. Sexually, sometimes life would get so busy that sex had to be scheduled, yes put on the calendar. Or timed for after they went to bed.

Now, understand this was prior to the @#$@$&* doing, let's just say he could have gone to prison. That sort of explains part of why I prefer intimacy with women.

Thank you for your input

Emily

 

[SimonDoom]

Something you left totally unclear about your query is this: what does her being a mom to kids those ages have to do with your story? Presumably it's an erotic story, so the kids won't have anything to do with the erotic activity. They'll be, at most, a side story.

I don't know how one would respond to your original post at its level of generality. All moms are different. I know this, not from being a mom, but from being a dad, and witnessing multiple moms doing their thing at close quarters, especially the mom of my kids.

Start with: what is her personality? Is she OCD? Risk averse? Hippieish? Free-spirited? Controlling? Is she the kind that would be a helicopter parent (of which there are many) or not? Parenting styles vary greatly, and they stem from the basic personality of the woman in question AND from her susceptibility to being influenced by peer pressure from other moms, which can be very strong.

My general advice would be: don't lay it on too thick. Don't tell any more about the parenting than is necessary for your story. Suggest, don't necessarily tell or show everything. Make your mom's parenting style consistent with her personality.

Ask questions like:

How comfortable is she letting her kids go about unsupervised?

Is the type that would stay up at night while the kids are out?

How conscientious is she?

Is she the kind of mom who thinks she needs to let her kids find their way to become responsible adults, or is she the kind that wants to shield them from risk at all cost so they make it to adulthood?

Is she domestic? Does she like to keep a clean home? Does she like to cook? Moms are all over the map on this.

How much is she influenced by her own upbringing? Her own parents? Does she have an overbearing mom?

What are her cultural influences?

 

[EmilyMiller]

Something you left totally unclear about your query is this: what does her being a mom to kids those ages have to do with your story? Presumably it's an erotic story, so the kids won't have anything to do with the erotic activity. They'll be, at most, a side story.

I don't know how one would respond to your original post at its level of generality. All moms are different. I know this, not from being a mom, but from being a dad, and witnessing multiple moms doing their thing at close quarters, especially the mom of my kids.

Start with: what is her personality? Is she OCD? Risk averse? Hippieish? Free-spirited? Controlling? Is she the kind that would be a helicopter parent (of which there are many) or not? Parenting styles vary greatly, and they stem from the basic personality of the woman in question AND from her susceptibility to being influenced by peer pressure from other moms, which can be very strong.

My general advice would be: don't lay it on too thick. Don't tell any more about the parenting than is necessary for your story. Suggest, don't necessarily tell or show everything. Make your mom's parenting style consistent with her personality.

Ask questions like:

How comfortable is she letting her kids go about unsupervised?

Is the type that would stay up at night while the kids are out?

How conscientious is she?

Is she the kind of mom who thinks she needs to let her kids find their way to become responsible adults, or is she the kind that wants to shield them from risk at all cost so they make it to adulthood?

Is she domestic? Does she like to keep a clean home? Does she like to cook? Moms are all over the map on this.

How much is she influenced by her own upbringing? Her own parents? Does she have an overbearing mom?

What are her cultural influences?

The first chapter was published a while ago. I had like three moms and three dads give me detailed feedback, most of which I acted on.

What do you think?

Bouncing Back Ch. 01

Emily

 

[SimonDoom]

I read the first chapter, and my reaction, in terms of advice going forward, is: less is more. Don't feel a need either to overdo the explanation of the relationship with the husband or to overdescribe the relationship with the kids. The heart of the story is the relationship between Cathy and Sarah, and offering enough, but not too much, detail, to make the journey toward that relationship seem plausible. Does it make any difference to your story what kind of mom she is, other than one that is sufficiently dutiful that she will take the kids out to have fun when the husband is being a selfish lout?

 

[EmilyMiller]

I read the first chapter, and my reaction, in terms of advice going forward, is: less is more. Don't feel a need either to overdo the explanation of the relationship with the husband or to overdescribe the relationship with the kids. The heart of the story is the relationship between Cathy and Sarah, and offering enough, but not too much, detail, to make the journey toward that relationship seem plausible. Does it make any difference to your story what kind of mom she is, other than one that is sufficiently dutiful that she will take the kids out to have fun when the husband is being a selfish lout?

Thanks

It does make a difference to where I see it going. But if the 14 750 word stories I have written have taught me one thing, it’s that I can cut stuff out in editing.

Emily

 

[SimonDoom]

Thanks

It does make a difference to where I see it going. But if the 14 750 word stories I have written have taught me one thing, it’s that I can cut stuff out in editing.

Emily

This is partly a difference in style and personality, so it is subjective, but IMO you should be careful as an author to check the desire to overshare. You don't have to say everything, tell everything, share everything. Focus on what you want the essence of the story to be, and share enough to advance that story, but not more than that.

 

[EmilyMiller]

This is partly a difference in style and personality, so it is subjective, but IMO you should be careful as an author to check the desire to overshare. You don't have to say everything, tell everything, share everything. Focus on what you want the essence of the story to be, and share enough to advance that story, but not more than that.

I will think about what you say

 

[cuzimhavingagoodtime]

Question for you: are you giving any particular consideration to the 6-8 year olds here? like I guess does it matter at all how well they're characterized?

Generally people struggle a lot with writing children, very young children especially. Most writers just don't have any model for how they think. So especially with kids in that 5-8 age range, they end up entirely as vessels for narrative convenience with no parsable personality or attributes.

I mean not that this comes up that much on literotica. Really the only times I've seen attempts for genuine child characters on this site are in Loving Wives, cause people want custody battles and stuff. But even than most of kids themselves getting fought over don't actually like, have dialogue or anything. which works perfectly well, they are present vaguely in the background and we just pay attention to other things.

So I guess I'm asking if the kids themselves are ever going to be important to story at some point, and you would mind if they failed to come across like real kids, or are they going to be mostly offscreen.

 

[EmilyMiller]

Question for you: are you giving any particular consideration to the 6-8 year olds here? like I guess does it matter at all how well they're characterized?

Generally people struggle a lot with writing children, very young children especially. Most writers just don't have any model for how they think. So especially with kids in that 5-8 age range, they end up entirely as vessels for narrative convenience with no parsable personality or attributes.

I mean not that this comes up that much on literotica. Really the only times I've seen attempts for genuine child characters on this site are in Loving Wives, cause people want custody battles and stuff. But even than most of kids themselves getting fought over don't actually like, have dialogue or anything. which works perfectly well, they are present vaguely in the background and we just pay attention to other things.

So I guess I'm asking if the kids themselves are ever going to be important to story at some point, and you would mind if they failed to come across like real kids, or are they going to be mostly offscreen.

I wrote real kids in Jacob’s Progress and was told I’d captured it OK.

As I say, the first chapter is already published, so tell me what you think?

Bouncing Back Ch. 01

Emily

 

[gunhilltrain]

The FMC also feels that having children late has meant her older body was less able to “bounce back” after two pregnancies, which is another theme.

I do put some thought into what I write .

Em

I have two children who are now 32 and 27. I haven't lived with them since the 1990's, but I visited them constantly for years. My ex-wife remarried, but then he passed in 2011.* I do talk to her on the phone quite frequently, like I had an hour-long conversation with her today. That's just a brief summary. It's possible that I would have some insights based on that history.

* That guy himself would be a good subject for a story,

 

[gunhilltrain]

Dammit. Cover blown.

Sigh. Now I'm going to be just miserable at my Purity Ball this weekend. *pout*

I'm actually a Buddhist monk living in Thailand. Everything I wrote about New York I got off the Internet. Everything about sex, too, to be honest. I am indeed 68, however.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I have two children who are now 32 and 27. I haven't lived with them since the 1990's, but I visited them constantly for years. My ex-wife remarried, but then he passed in 2011.* I do talk to her on the phone quite frequently, like I had an hour-long conversation with her today. That's just a brief summary. It's possible that I would have some insights based on that history.

* That guy himself would be a good subject for a story,

Chapter 1 is published (see links above).

Tell me if you think I did this aspect justice.

Emily

 

[gunhilltrain]

Chapter 1 is published (see links above).

Tell me if you think I did this aspect justice.

Emily

My first impression of it is that is seems realistic. I'm trying to take into account that my life doesn't line up exactly with it. For example, my kids were more mellow, but I know that sibling rivalry can be a big factor in some families.

Simon mentioned that it could be edited somewhat. Probably true, to some degree, I'd have to look at it more carefully to figure out what might go. Sometimes I cut sentences and then add others that seem more on point, so the total length may stay the same or even grow longer.

P.S.: I might have more to say tomorrow.

 

[EmilyMiller]

My first impression of it is that is seems realistic. I'm trying to take into account that my life doesn't line up exactly with it. For example, my kids were more mellow, but I know that sibling rivalry can be a big factor in some families.

Simon mentioned that it could be edited somewhat. Probably true, to some degree, I'd have to look at it more carefully to figure out what might go. Sometimes I cut sentences and then add others that seem more on point, so the total length may stay the same or even grow longer.

P.S.: I might have more to say tomorrow.

Thanks - that’s helpful

 

[gunhilltrain]

Thanks - that’s helpful

I thought more about it for today. It is certainly true that having even one child will change the dynamics of a marriage, likely for a long time. That can be either good or bad, but the household is not just larger. The child or children will shift the focus of the parents' attention away from merely being a couple. For one thing one or more children will be extremely time-consuming in what they need from the parents. Slowly, the kids become more self-reliant over the years but they start out needing everything from their
parents. The financial burden certainly is another thing to note.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I thought more about it for today. It is certainly true that having even one child will change the dynamics of a marriage, likely for a long time. That can be either good or bad, but the household is not just larger. The child or children will shift the focus of the parents' attention away from merely being a couple. For one thing one or more children will be extremely time-consuming in what they need from the parents. Slowly, the kids become more self-reliant over the years but they start out needing everything from their
parents. The financial burden certainly is another thing to note.

I tried to convey some of that. I had six parents offer me perspectives, which was helpful.

Emily

 

[gunhilltrain]

I decided to break this into two posts. It struck me that when I was six to eight like the kids in the story, it was 1961 to 1963. Back then kids could play in the street - or on the sidewalk, actually - and one or both or may parents or my grandfather would be around someplace in front of the building talking to the neighbors. At some point I and my siblings could go out by ourselves, so my mom didn't constantly have to come up some activity for us to do.

That kind of lifestyle doesn't exist in much of America now so parents, especially mothers, have more pressure on them to keep their children occupied. My kids had a yard in back of our house where they could go, although usually my wife or I were out there with them.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I decided to break this into two posts. It struck me that when I was six to eight like the kids in the story, it was 1961 to 1963. Back then kids could play in the street - or on the sidewalk, actually - and one or both or may parents or my grandfather would be around someplace in front of the building talking to the neighbors. At some point I and my siblings could go out by ourselves, so my mom didn't constantly have to come up some activity for us to do.

That kind of lifestyle doesn't exist in much of America now so parents, especially mothers, have more pressure on them to keep their children occupied. My kids had a yard in back of our house where they could go, although usually my wife or I were out there with them.

The story is set in an unseasonably rainy July, which adds to the cabin fever aspects.

Emily