Limited Offer

[hotsweetdesire]

*grabs the rum*



Any of you ladies want a NO chicken dinner on a tropical island?

It would be my pleasure to keep you company.
But I do have an offer for you ladies while poet finds another boat. I just have to check with the Boss before I finish up the details.

 

[pensivepoet]

*grabs the rum*



Any of you ladies want a NO chicken dinner on a tropical island?

Oh, pay no attention to that update. Much of it was exaggerated.
A mere setback.
I'm hiding out~I mean vacationing, in Provo Utah, and have managed to "procure" a laptop.
As soon as things cool off I'll resume the hunt for a worthy vessel and trustworthy crew.
Even now, I'm talking with a guy who is stuck in Tahiti.
As soon as he is able to convince the jury that he bought the boat, and didn't kill the Zackweillers, we'll begin new negotiations.
In the meantime, you can donate to the "free Smitty and the girls" fund drive using paypal.
Thanks for your understanding.
~poet

 

[EquinoxRising]

It would be my pleasure to keep you company.
But I do have an offer for you ladies while poet finds another boat. I just have to check with the Boss before I finish up the details.

Oh, pay no attention to that update. Much of it was exaggerated.
A mere setback.
I'm hiding out~I mean vacationing, in Provo Utah, and have managed to "procure" a laptop.
As soon as things cool off I'll resume the hunt for a worthy vessel and trustworthy crew.
Even now, I'm talking with a guy who is stuck in Tahiti.
As soon as he is able to convince the jury that he bought the boat, and didn't kill the Zackweillers, we'll begin new negotiations.
In the meantime, you can donate to the "free Smitty and the girls" fund drive using paypal.
Thanks for your understanding.
~poet

In the meantime, ladies, lez have some fun!

 

[pensivepoet]

In the meantime, ladies, lez have some fun!

Hmmm.....
This seems to be a recurring theme in my life.
I was in a very serious, very deep relationship.
One day, quite out of the blue, she says to me, "you know, after you and I are through, I'm only going to be with women from then on"
I couldn't think of a good response, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't a compliment.

 

[hotsweetdesire]

Ok ladies I checked with the Boss and all is cleared. I have to go on a 3 month tour and you may join at any time. We will be traveling in a private jet, filled with many men that are smooth with the tongue and flexible with the fingers *powerful fingers I might add* and yes there will be women too! We'll travel around the country with an amazing earthquaking, thunder shaking, love making rock and roll band! We'll have the best seats in the house every night, maybe even on stage for a little Dancing in the Dark. We get all the perks, parties, other bands visiting, you'll get to experience the true meaning of sex, liquor and rock and roll. We'll end each night in a 5 star hotel with Mark, Jose, Mr.Biccardi, Mr.Stoli and some Bombay Sapphires on ice. Plus a little after dinner Baily's if you want to fill your mouth with something sweet and creamy. Room service all night and yes massages come with that by someone hot, thick and juicy.All expenses paid and I'm still handing out tips ladies.
Who would like to join?

 

[EquinoxRising]

Hmmm.....
This seems to be a recurring theme in my life.
I was in a very serious, very deep relationship.
One day, quite out of the blue, she says to me, "you know, after you and I are through, I'm only going to be with women from then on"
I couldn't think of a good response, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't a compliment.

Yikes. (If a real insight into your life and soul, what a cunt!)

 

[EquinoxRising]

Ok ladies I checked with the Boss and all is cleared. I have to go on a 3 month tour and you may join at any time. We will be traveling in a private jet, filled with many men that are smooth with the tongue and flexible with the fingers *powerful fingers I might add* and yes there will be women too! We'll travel around the country with an amazing earthquaking, thunder shaking, love making rock and roll band! We'll have the best seats in the house every night, maybe even on stage for a little Dancing in the Dark. We get all the perks, parties, other bands visiting, you'll get to experience the true meaning of sex, liquor and rock and roll. We'll end each night in a 5 star hotel with Mark, Jose, Mr.Biccardi, Mr.Stoli and some Bombay Sapphires on ice. Plus a little after dinner Baily's if you want to fill your mouth with something sweet and creamy. Room service all night and yes massages come with that by someone hot, thick and juicy.All expenses paid and I'm still handing out tips ladies.
Who would like to join?

How you doin'?

 

[pensivepoet]

Ok ladies I checked with the Boss and all is cleared. I have to go on a 3 month tour and you may join at any time. We will be traveling in a private jet, filled with many men that are smooth with the tongue and flexible with the fingers *powerful fingers I might add* and yes there will be women too! We'll travel around the country with an amazing earthquaking, thunder shaking, love making rock and roll band! We'll have the best seats in the house every night, maybe even on stage for a little Dancing in the Dark. We get all the perks, parties, other bands visiting, you'll get to experience the true meaning of sex, liquor and rock and roll. We'll end each night in a 5 star hotel with Mark, Jose, Mr.Biccardi, Mr.Stoli and some Bombay Sapphires on ice. Plus a little after dinner Baily's if you want to fill your mouth with something sweet and creamy. Room service all night and yes massages come with that by someone hot, thick and juicy.All expenses paid and I'm still handing out tips ladies.
Who would like to join?

This is clearly the most egregious thread jack in history!
Reported!
Ya know, it was my great grandfather that told wilbur wright about the plane idea one night in a tavern.
And Google was my Uncle's idea.
This shit has got to stop.
But until I can get Miss HotandDeep to get the lawsuit together, I find myself, somewhat embarrassingly, in need of employ.
Are you hiring towel boys or bartenders?

 

[hotsweetdesire]

This is clearly the most egregious thread jack in history!
Reported!
Ya know, it was my great grandfather that told wilbur wright about the plane idea one night in a tavern.
And Google was my Uncle's idea.
This shit has got to stop.
But until I can get Miss HotandDeep to get the lawsuit together, I find myself, somewhat embarrassingly, in need of employ.
Are you hiring towel boys or bartenders?

Poet you can report it but I think the thread police is joining me. Don't worry we'll be back on time for your voyage...if you ever find a boat. Let me see what I can come up with, I have positions filling quick, but I'm sure I can find room for you.

 

[hotsweetdesire]

Poet, I made a new position just for you but it requires being of service to the ladies since I'll be busy running around. Since it's the River tour and the theme is Ties that Bind, you'll have to be at their disposal with a collar and leash.I would suggest bringing knee pads since your best quality assumes that position. Now it's not limited to being by their side, you'll have to be their errand boy and sometimes being locked away so they can play. Maybe if your good, I'll come visit with a special treat. One more thing Poet, you must find a way to get the ladies to agree.

 

[pensivepoet]

Hmmm....this must be a trick. No one has ever offered me knee pads before.
And convince the ladies?
1. That would probably require a full refund of their money long spent.
2. It seems my charisma has forever turned them from all men forever.
But I will gladly hand wash Equi's shorts every night.
Paint KyLady's toenails before dinner
And be your personal assistant at your beck and call.
Do I get a cool uniform?

 

[submit4pleasure]

Hmmm.....
This seems to be a recurring theme in my life.
I was in a very serious, very deep relationship.
One day, quite out of the blue, she says to me, "you know, after you and I are through, I'm only going to be with women from then on"
I couldn't think of a good response, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't a compliment.

I've said that same thing!
And it definitely wasn't meant as a compliment.

Although, I can't imagine why any woman would say it you...

 

[AKentuckyLady]

Hmmm....this must be a trick. No one has ever offered me knee pads before.
And convince the ladies?
1. That would probably require a full refund of their money long spent.
2. It seems my charisma has forever turned them from all men forever.
But I will gladly hand wash Equi's shorts every night.
Paint KyLady's toenails before dinner
And be your personal assistant at your beck and call.
Do I get a cool uniform?

Oh I'm so happy that the party is back on!

Paint my toenails? You mean my masseuse, hairdresser, manicurist, personal assistant and private shopper aren't invited?

*stomps foot* That is just not acceptable! And where's my Maker's Mark?

 

[EquinoxRising]

But I will gladly hand wash Equi's shorts every night.

Kinky.

 

[pensivepoet]

I've said that same thing!
And it definitely wasn't meant as a compliment.

Although, I can't imagine why any woman would say it you...

Thanks, but you would if you knew me.
Women have me convinced my name is "Exasperating"

 

[pensivepoet]

Kinky.

I don't even care if you're still wearing them!

 

[pensivepoet]

Oh I'm so happy that the party is back on!

Paint my toenails? You mean my masseuse, hairdresser, manicurist, personal assistant and private shopper aren't invited?

*stomps foot* That is just not acceptable! And where's my Maker's Mark?

This is Desire's party. All complaints go to her.
But I will stomp grapes for you in your bathtub to the hokie pokie in a see through toga!
That's the only part of wine making I know.

 

[AKentuckyLady]

This is Desire's party. All complaints go to her.
But I will stomp grapes for you in your bathtub to the hokie pokie in a see through toga!
That's the only part of wine making I know.

Pensive, dearest.

I have grown quite fond of you, in an absentee landlord kind of way, so please don't take this wrong.

Bourbon is made of corn, rye, and barley. Grapes have nothing do it with it. Unless you want the grapes for...

 

[EquinoxRising]

I don't even care if you're still wearing them!

That's what makes it kinky. Duh.

 

[ElizabethWest]

Pensive, dearest.

I have grown quite fond of you, in an absentee landlord kind of way, so please don't take this wrong.

Bourbon is made of corn, rye, and barley. Grapes have nothing do it with it. Unless you want the grapes for...

Thank you for setting him straight. As a native Kentuckian myself, that is just wrong.

 

[hotsweetdesire]

This is Desire's party. All complaints go to her.
But I will stomp grapes for you in your bathtub to the hokie pokie in a see through toga!
That's the only part of wine making I know.

*And the whip comes out*
My guests don't seem satisfied. Poet, don't embarrass me now, I've given you an opportunity of a lifetime. You must make it up to Ketucky and show her your eagerness to please. And for the love of all the gods, give something more to amuse Equi besides kinky! If I see anymore complaints, I might have to temporarily suspend your position.

 

[pensivepoet]

Pensive, dearest.

I have grown quite fond of you, in an absentee landlord kind of way, so please don't take this wrong.

Bourbon is made of corn, rye, and barley. Grapes have nothing do it with it. Unless you want the grapes for...

....Absentee landlord kind of way...
*hmm...wtf does that mean, the boy wonders.*
If I had an absent landlady, I'd most likely be on her bed with her dainties and toys.
*so it must be a good thing*
Thanks, KyL!
Ok, fine. I'll sell my soul to Ms Desires to make sure there's bourbon there. But I'll miss doing the bathtub dance.

 

[pensivepoet]

That's what makes it kinky. Duh.

I'm thinking we need to share a room. A big one with soundproof walls and black lights.

 

[pensivepoet]

*And the whip comes out*
My guests don't seem satisfied. Poet, don't embarrass me now, I've given you an opportunity of a lifetime. You must make it up to Ketucky and show her your eagerness to please. And for the love of all the gods, give something more to amuse Equi besides kinky! If I see anymore complaints, I might have to temporarily suspend your position.

Did you just say you'd put me in a suspended position?
That's the way I read it.
"and the whip comes out!"
*thinking*
Ok, behaving gets me these things, or not behaving?
It's important.

 

[pensivepoet]

Thank you for setting him straight. As a native Kentuckian myself, that is just wrong.

Stop encouraging her please!
She's enjoying it too much.