Is this fair?

[Noor]

They're still together and I think they have 3 kids now. Mary Ann Tourneau (sp)

It seems like there is a lot of that going on now. You hear about it weekly. Not male teacher/female student either. It's the other way around - female teacher/male student.

They eventually divorced and she died a cancer a few years ago. He was still in her life though in a fashion.

 

[Dapperguy]

Wasn't she 15 or 16? And in that state it's a crime to have sex with a student even at 18? His wife did say shag all the women you want but why target your students?

Not watched third ep yet. How the fuck did he find time to sleep and eat?

Green cheese is inedible.

 

[KateAt55]

Life isn't fair

Wait are we sure about this?

 

[policywank]

I think that one of the things that makes it so hard to assess circumstances like this is society's aversion to making distinctions as to what type of sexual assault occurred and all the details as to how it came about. It is treated as one big homogenous category.

I think I understand why. There is a serious concern that by accepting that there are different categories of severity we facilitate those who try to make the argument that "oh it wasn't that bad." And there certainly seems to be precedent that historically courts were effectively manipulated by defence lawyers who downplayed their client's behaviour or tried to introduce doubt around matters of consent or dragged past behaviour into the discussion even if it had nothing to do with the event under scrutiny.

But I think that cancel culture has taken us too far in the other direction if we feel compelled to label any and all suspect activity with the worst characterization. We must resist those who would seek to invalidate a victims experience, but I don't see how we can have honest conversations without being able to be explicit about what did or didn't happen.

For instance, as others have said an adult having sex with a 16 year old student is clearly a crime because she is underage. But if she has reached the age of consent and did in fact consent I don't think it is a crime. It is inadvisable because of the power dynamics and he should most certainly expect to be fired. But that is not the same as a crime. Nor does the existence of a power imbalance automatically mean the person in power abuses that imbalance. Companies and institutions frequently have policies against people in such circumstances fraternizing because it is impractical to adjudicate exactly when an abuse of power has occurred and the only rationale approach is for the company or institution to implement a policy against it (which also insulates it from any accusations that it facilitated inappropriate behaviour). But that should not be equated with the premise that one of the two people who knowingly ignoring that policy have committed a crime.

In fact, I have known many couples who got together in defiance of their employers' policies and just kept it quiet by mutual agreement. The partner in a position of power didn't abuse it. And they ended up getting married and living a happy life. Obviously that isn't what happened here and it sounds like the guy was a total dirt bag, but like it or not that isn't a crime. Is it possible that any adult women he was with thought it was true romance and got angry when it turned out it wasn't. Could they try to use the power imbalance argument as a premise to criminalize being a jerk even if he never did abuse that imbalance?

 

[NancyPan]

The age difference is only one (albeit significant) of the issues. More important, in my view, is the clear abuse of the power differential. Any sexual relationship between teacher/student, boss/employee, therapist/client, coach/player, doctor/patient, etc. is a clear ethics violation and abuse of power. All those professions have standards of practice strictly forbidding it. So-called “consent” by a student to have sex with her teacher is not viable.

No teacher should be having sex with his/her students whether high school, college, grad school, or adult learners.