I write detailed graphic gay erotica but I don’t want to fuck men. What’s with that?

[Tayloroc]

I too am happy for you and congratulations!

 

[LustyScribe]

Sorry, this may be wordy as I feel some background is needed. The goal is to get peoples input on why writing graphic, detailed gay erotica turns me on so much but I’m not attracted to men. I am a very oversexed person and I would say all of my fantasies and fetishes are quite far from vanilla. I would think one would wodely group them as ‘submissive’, and I write in other categories. That said, here’s some background…

I’m a very happily married 47 year old white guy. I’m quite alpha and extroverted, outwardly the typical ‘man’s man’ and would fit a lot of the New Yorker stereotypes. I work in finance, do well, like sports, comfortable in groups and can get a whole room laughing. One thing I am that may not be obvious to people right away is that I’m an Uber-liberal.

My wife and I are best friends and have mainly the same common interests. Every aspect of our relationship is a 10 except sex, which Id say is a 7-ish. I’m very attracted to her and I get very hard, the sex is just a little vanilla. I love my wife so much and like I said, sex feels good and she knows I watch a lot of porn and gives me that space. My other outlet os writing erotica - she doesn’t know that because the content would be so embarrassing! Although I don’t think she’d mind. I also have to say that I’m so happy in my marriage, I don’t feel sexual attraction towards others very much at all, if that makes sense. I jerk off a lot to porn, love a chat room, erotica, but not only would I not cheat, I’m really only interested in fucking my wife.

So with that background, my question is, what are people’s thoughts on my sexuality and fantasies/fetishes? Face to face, to this day, I never felt a sexual attraction to a man. When I was about 21 though, I discovered transsexuals and was obsessed for about 10 years. I primarily had sex with women and girlfriends, but I had a ton of closet encounters with transsexuals, mainly from the web or the NYC street walking areas (always safe by the way). Right from the start, I loved fondling and sucking their cocks, and I loved grinding our dicks together. Within a year, I got fucked and from that point on, I much preferred to bottom when I was with a special girl. All told, I would say about 12 girls fucked me 20 or so times (the number of transsexuals that bottomed for me is about the same). I sucked numerous cocks, well over 50 girls. I did love getting sucked as much as sucking, but oddly I would say with an only few exceptions, I much preferred to get anal than give. This was also the rise of internet porn and transsexual porn was my go to. So that establishes I love dicks. Very much, bigger the better, but I like them on women.

During this time I remained really attracted to women and their pussies. I love to eat and finger and please. I had girlfriends and more straight sex than transsexual encounters. When I was really horny, and couldn’t find a woman or transsexual, I did hook up with a guy or two. The thought was hot, but when they’d get there, I really wasn’t into it. I definitely didn’t want to kiss and certainly didn’t want anal either way. As I recall, we would grind and cum and maybe they would suck me. I would look for feminine looking guys, particularly Asian (Asian was my preference for cross-dressers to as they struck me as more feminine looking).

If a different fetish came into play, it was a little hotter. I remember in the mid-2000’s, I specifically looked for an Asian man to shave my genitals. He began to suck me in the shower while he groomed me and I remember us grinding to orgasm in bed afterwards. It was a little hot, but again no kissing, I was into the shaving, but not totally into the guy. I also went to a massage parlor to get massaged and shaved by an Asian man. I played with his dick through his pants, but again, I wasn’t excited like when I was with a woman or transsexual, and when I came, in all of the situations with men I just discussed, I was really done. No attraction at all and I wanted to get out of there.

This fetish morphed. I met a woman in-line through an ad where I told her I wanted to be submissive and was open to going really far. She pegged me and we found two guys for threesomes. One guy had a huge dick, and the situation was hot, but I had no desire to suck it when given the opportunity, even though in my head I yearned for forced-bi and for a woman to know (and even hotter) watch me suck a dick. This is the only person that was in my life for more than a hook up (let’s say who met my family) that knew my sub tendencies.

My main obsession today is black man- white female porn. When I fuck my wife, I picture me readying her for a black man with a huge cock and then him fucking her. Cuckolding and small penis humiliation excites me to no end. My published stories mostly revolve around these topics. Another funny thing is I have a big dick. Very thick and nearly seven inches, but when it is soft it can be pretty small and I love taking pictures of it when it is really shriveled. I’m basically into everything submissive except pain. I love big cock (especially black)/ small comparisons. Many of my gay stories involve bbc, closet cases, etc. and the protagonist is always the bottom. I also haven’t published them yet, but work in incest stories as well. Cosplay is another big fetish - hot cosplay chicks. I like curvy women and milky white skin and light hair. I don’t know, maybe I’m rambling, but it all seems like important info to get to the bottom of why I like what I like.

So that’s a good start on the background if people would be so kind to give their thoughts and input. I guess I’m asking for a free shrink. I have my own theories, but I don’t want to taint Frye responses, if I get any. But I think it’s an interesting conversation. Let me end by expressing just how fucking turned on and hard I get when I get my gay story ideas. When I’m writing them, outlining them in my head in bed or the car. I’m so fucking turned on! But I really have no attraction to men in real life. What is up with that! I hope this isn’t too rambling…but very open to constructive feedback and answering questions.

So, in a nutshell (any perceived innuendo...I take responsibility for it!), you're a complex creature...right? Welcome!
I think the reality is that most (never say "all") of us have a few twists, a few short-circuits that make us different from whatever the heck "normal" is. The first step towards making peace with the idea that you're not a clone is to realize that isn't a bad thing. We're ALL weird. Where life gets sweet is when you move beyond accepting it and begin to EMBRACE it. When I read how Escierto describes their relationship, I don't think "But she's..." I think, "Wow, what an awesome love story!" And then I think, "Well good for them!" And then I think, "I wish I had that much joy in MY marriage." So my advice is don't spend too much time analyzing it, figuring it out. Just go live your passions.

 

[live4thebj]

I don’t know you and you don’t know me but if something turns you on then that is your thing. If you write about gay sex then you are hiding in the closet. I write about incest but never done it but would I? Fuck yeah I would!!!

 

[CuckedbyBBC]

which reply? Or the whole thread? I think there has been a lot of good insights and acceptance here. Truly, the best of Lit and why this place is so special. It can be a life affirming and thus a life changing place.*
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* Not to say that it doesn't have its share of trolls and assholes. But what place on the internet lacks those? Such is life on the internet!

There really are so many awesome responses on this thread and the whole board. This really is some site. Maybe there’s trolls but the interesting people out number them in droves - unlike most other places.

All of these responses have me thinking another way…why did I write this and some of the other threads I started (and why did I write the responses to other people’s threads). I have my own theories and I really do just do me! As I said, I love my wife so I’m totally not interested in sex with anyone else but I’ll start there:

1) It’s clearly a sexual outlet without cheating
2) It’s such a thrill to confess - like total cock tingling thrill to tell other humans that I’ve sucked cock and been fucked
3) I definitely want to explore and hear other’s thoughts on what turns me on, from a psychological and just general perspective. I particularly like to hear people’s take on whether an attraction to transsexuals and dicks but not to men is homosexual, Hetero or in-between. I also like to hear their take on if it’s related to my IR and cuck obsession and other submissive fantasies, and how this relates to my alpha personality and man’s man face I show to the world. I particularly want to hear from women, even more of a thrill!
4) I thought I would and succeeded in finding others with similar thoughts and have some good chats. Maybe find erotic pen pals, especially women that want to humiliate me over email.
5) like I said, I succumb to societal pressure and don’t talk about this with anyone I know, but I don’t regret it. So I guess I just like to rail in society’s ridiculous judgement of who others like to fuck and/or how!

 

[ImiGirrst]

5) like I said, I succumb to societal pressure and don’t talk about this with anyone I know, but I don’t regret it. So I guess I just like to rail in society’s ridiculous judgement of who others like to fuck and/or how!

Depending on where you are in the world, it can be very dangerous to talk to people in real life. You might think you have synergy, but it's a very high price to pay if you don't, in the US.

 

[Tayloroc]

Depending on where you are in the world, it can be very dangerous to talk to people in real life. You might think you have synergy, but it's a very high price to pay if you don't, in the US.

You’re sooo right

 

[tristantrotsky]

Writing is always authenticated by drawing on genuine experience or emotions.
If there is not a degree of genuine content in there, the fiction emerges flat and unconvincing.

 

[Escierto]

Depending on where you are in the world, it can be very dangerous to talk to people in real life. You might think you have synergy, but it's a very high price to pay if you don't, in the US.

So true!

 

[MarksExperiences]

You want cock. Subconsciously

 

[Jeph77]

Writing is always authenticated by drawing on genuine experience or emotions.
If there is not a degree of genuine content in there, the fiction emerges flat and unconvincing.

That's true. Perhaps the cock's-eye-view, unencumbered by translating the female experience, in a visceral sense, gives the writing authenticity.

 

[KinkStevens]

People write killer thrillers and don’t want to murder also

 

[KinkStevens]

You want cock. Subconsciously

Probably

 

[Biker_Faerie]

I have wanted to do an RP with someone able to play a gay/bisexual male character but there seem to be few on here

My idea is that the RP is about a woman who discovers her husband is gay/bisexual and decides to find men/ couples to satisfy their urges

 

[KinkStevens]

When it comes to transgender people, one thing is for sure. Each one of them has his or her own path. Some transition completely, others like my girlfriend don’t. She is happy with her body and loves being a top (even though she keeps it a secret from everyone).

My girl.
View attachment 2225570

Thanks

 

[eroticspank]

@CuckedbyBBC thanks for starting this thread. I like the responses and am glad several women have responded too.

My initial thoughts are you are submissive and bisexual. It is okay to be bisexual. If you like, you can use the term hedonist, meaning you are a pleasure seeker. You seek to give and receive pleasure from others no matter the gender.

Here is my story. I have read several gay male stories here on Literotica and in books that really turned me on. I think it was because they were well-written and there was something in the scene that turned me on. Example: In the book, "Exit to Eden" by Ann Rampling aka Ann Rice, there is a scene where two guys wrestle naked. The objective is to subdue your opponent and fuck him in front of everyone. The description really turned me on but I am not attracted to men and I would not try that. But, I love the "being forced" theme and could do that in a pegging scenario. I have enjoyed some great pegging with some fun ladies in the past.

I have had fantasies of being fucked in front of my girlfriend by a guy. I even wrote a story on this a while back, though did not post it here. Again, I see this as the same theme, being forced. In my fantasies, I am not interested in sucking cock or even fondling dicks. I did meet a transsexual and she fucked me. She was very attractive but when I got to her dick, I was turned off. I had her fuck me from behind and it was not a big turn-on.

I have done some crossdressing--mainly lingerie--and pegging with lady friends and a few Dommes. I really enjoy it but have accepted the fact that I am not attracted to men and that kind of scene will be in written fantasy only.
ES

 

[CuckedbyBBC]

@CuckedbyBBC thanks for starting this thread. I like the responses and am glad several women have responded too.

My initial thoughts are you are submissive and bisexual. It is okay to be bisexual. If you like, you can use the term hedonist, meaning you are a pleasure seeker. You seek to give and receive pleasure from others no matter the gender.

Here is my story. I have read several gay male stories here on Literotica and in books that really turned me on. I think it was because they were well-written and there was something in the scene that turned me on. Example: In the book, "Exit to Eden" by Ann Rampling aka Ann Rice, there is a scene where two guys wrestle naked. The objective is to subdue your opponent and fuck him in front of everyone. The description really turned me on but I am not attracted to men and I would not try that. But, I love the "being forced" theme and could do that in a pegging scenario. I have enjoyed some great pegging with some fun ladies in the past.

I have had fantasies of being fucked in front of my girlfriend by a guy. I even wrote a story on this a while back, though did not post it here. Again, I see this as the same theme, being forced. In my fantasies, I am not interested in sucking cock or even fondling dicks. I did meet a transsexual and she fucked me. She was very attractive but when I got to her dick, I was turned off. I had her fuck me from behind and it was not a big turn-on.

I have done some crossdressing--mainly lingerie--and pegging with lady friends and a few Dommes. I really enjoy it but have accepted the fact that I am not attracted to men and that kind of scene will be in written fantasy only.
ES

Thank you for this awesome reply eroticspank. You’re right, there’s many great responses. I honestly have no aversion to being called bisexual. In fact I’d embrace it. Unfortunately I’d still hide it from people I know. I would not cheat on my wife though, I’m proud of that. I definitely desire to be submissive.

My initial thoughts about your post is that the “being forced” concept that turns you on relates to me. I feel the responsibility of being alpha in every aspect of my life. I believe that’s why my sexual fantasies, if I had to choose two words, would fall into submissive or taboo. I love how people are different. You are not attracted to men, I’m not either, but I do love cocks and sucking and fucking them - as long as they belong to a feminine looking person. we both enjoy pegging, and although I wouldn’t say I cross-dressed, I’ve posted about wearing panties while working out or jerking off. Sexuality truly is a spectrum. Thank the gods for Literotica!

 

[Escierto]

@CuckedbyBBC thanks for starting this thread. I like the responses and am glad several women have responded too.

My initial thoughts are you are submissive and bisexual. It is okay to be bisexual. If you like, you can use the term hedonist, meaning you are a pleasure seeker. You seek to give and receive pleasure from others no matter the gender.

Here is my story. I have read several gay male stories here on Literotica and in books that really turned me on. I think it was because they were well-written and there was something in the scene that turned me on. Example: In the book, "Exit to Eden" by Ann Rampling aka Ann Rice, there is a scene where two guys wrestle naked. The objective is to subdue your opponent and fuck him in front of everyone. The description really turned me on but I am not attracted to men and I would not try that. But, I love the "being forced" theme and could do that in a pegging scenario. I have enjoyed some great pegging with some fun ladies in the past.

I have had fantasies of being fucked in front of my girlfriend by a guy. I even wrote a story on this a while back, though did not post it here. Again, I see this as the same theme, being forced. In my fantasies, I am not interested in sucking cock or even fondling dicks. I did meet a transsexual and she fucked me. She was very attractive but when I got to her dick, I was turned off. I had her fuck me from behind and it was not a big turn-on.

I have done some crossdressing--mainly lingerie--and pegging with lady friends and a few Dommes. I really enjoy it but have accepted the fact that I am not attracted to men and that kind of scene will be in written fantasy only.
ES

Your experience was quite different from mine. The first time I was with a transgender woman, I thought I might freak out when I saw her cock. Instead she was so feminine that I couldn’t think of her cock as being anything other than female. So I was quite happy to let her fuck me five times that night.

 

[eroticspank]

Your experience was quite different from mine. The first time I was with a transgender woman, I thought I might freak out when I saw her cock. Instead she was so feminine that I couldn’t think of her cock as being anything other than female. So I was quite happy to let her fuck me five times that night.

Thanks. I like reading your experiences and responses. I feel that way when I see transgender women online and in videos. But when I met one in real life, I was turned off by her dick. It was not ugly--her dick, and she was very attractive. She had smooth, sexy legs. I think since it was a one-night stand that may have been part of it. So if I ever take a real cock in my ass again it will be a transgender woman. I am not attracted to men at all.
ES

 

[Escierto]

Thanks. I like reading your experiences and responses. I feel that way when I see transgender women online and in videos. But when I met one in real life, I was turned off by her dick. It was not ugly--her dick, and she was very attractive. She had smooth, sexy legs. I think since it was a one-night stand that may have been part of it. So if I ever take a real cock in my ass again it will be a transgender woman. I am not attracted to men at all.
ES

You seem to leave open the possibility of doing it again but why would you? Do you think that if you had more of a relationship with the person that would change things?

 

[Katch123]

Sorry, this may be wordy as I feel some background is needed. The goal is to get peoples input on why writing graphic, detailed gay erotica turns me on so much but I’m not attracted to men. I am a very oversexed person and I would say all of my fantasies and fetishes are quite far from vanilla. I would think one would wodely group them as ‘submissive’, and I write in other categories. That said, here’s some background…

I’m a very happily married 47 year old white guy. I’m quite alpha and extroverted, outwardly the typical ‘man’s man’ and would fit a lot of the New Yorker stereotypes. I work in finance, do well, like sports, comfortable in groups and can get a whole room laughing. One thing I am that may not be obvious to people right away is that I’m an Uber-liberal.

My wife and I are best friends and have mainly the same common interests. Every aspect of our relationship is a 10 except sex, which Id say is a 7-ish. I’m very attracted to her and I get very hard, the sex is just a little vanilla. I love my wife so much and like I said, sex feels good and she knows I watch a lot of porn and gives me that space. My other outlet os writing erotica - she doesn’t know that because the content would be so embarrassing! Although I don’t think she’d mind. I also have to say that I’m so happy in my marriage, I don’t feel sexual attraction towards others very much at all, if that makes sense. I jerk off a lot to porn, love a chat room, erotica, but not only would I not cheat, I’m really only interested in fucking my wife.

So with that background, my question is, what are people’s thoughts on my sexuality and fantasies/fetishes? Face to face, to this day, I never felt a sexual attraction to a man. When I was about 21 though, I discovered transsexuals and was obsessed for about 10 years. I primarily had sex with women and girlfriends, but I had a ton of closet encounters with transsexuals, mainly from the web or the NYC street walking areas (always safe by the way). Right from the start, I loved fondling and sucking their cocks, and I loved grinding our dicks together. Within a year, I got fucked and from that point on, I much preferred to bottom when I was with a special girl. All told, I would say about 12 girls fucked me 20 or so times (the number of transsexuals that bottomed for me is about the same). I sucked numerous cocks, well over 50 girls. I did love getting sucked as much as sucking, but oddly I would say with an only few exceptions, I much preferred to get anal than give. This was also the rise of internet porn and transsexual porn was my go to. So that establishes I love dicks. Very much, bigger the better, but I like them on women.

During this time I remained really attracted to women and their pussies. I love to eat and finger and please. I had girlfriends and more straight sex than transsexual encounters. When I was really horny, and couldn’t find a woman or transsexual, I did hook up with a guy or two. The thought was hot, but when they’d get there, I really wasn’t into it. I definitely didn’t want to kiss and certainly didn’t want anal either way. As I recall, we would grind and cum and maybe they would suck me. I would look for feminine looking guys, particularly Asian (Asian was my preference for cross-dressers to as they struck me as more feminine looking).

If a different fetish came into play, it was a little hotter. I remember in the mid-2000’s, I specifically looked for an Asian man to shave my genitals. He began to suck me in the shower while he groomed me and I remember us grinding to orgasm in bed afterwards. It was a little hot, but again no kissing, I was into the shaving, but not totally into the guy. I also went to a massage parlor to get massaged and shaved by an Asian man. I played with his dick through his pants, but again, I wasn’t excited like when I was with a woman or transsexual, and when I came, in all of the situations with men I just discussed, I was really done. No attraction at all and I wanted to get out of there.

This fetish morphed. I met a woman in-line through an ad where I told her I wanted to be submissive and was open to going really far. She pegged me and we found two guys for threesomes. One guy had a huge dick, and the situation was hot, but I had no desire to suck it when given the opportunity, even though in my head I yearned for forced-bi and for a woman to know (and even hotter) watch me suck a dick. This is the only person that was in my life for more than a hook up (let’s say who met my family) that knew my sub tendencies.

My main obsession today is black man- white female porn. When I fuck my wife, I picture me readying her for a black man with a huge cock and then him fucking her. Cuckolding and small penis humiliation excites me to no end. My published stories mostly revolve around these topics. Another funny thing is I have a big dick. Very thick and nearly seven inches, but when it is soft it can be pretty small and I love taking pictures of it when it is really shriveled. I’m basically into everything submissive except pain. I love big cock (especially black)/ small comparisons. Many of my gay stories involve bbc, closet cases, etc. and the protagonist is always the bottom. I also haven’t published them yet, but work in incest stories as well. Cosplay is another big fetish - hot cosplay chicks. I like curvy women and milky white skin and light hair. I don’t know, maybe I’m rambling, but it all seems like important info to get to the bottom of why I like what I like.

So that’s a good start on the background if people would be so kind to give their thoughts and input. I guess I’m asking for a free shrink. I have my own theories, but I don’t want to taint Frye responses, if I get any. But I think it’s an interesting conversation. Let me end by expressing just how fucking turned on and hard I get when I get my gay story ideas. When I’m writing them, outlining them in my head in bed or the car. I’m so fucking turned on! But I really have no attraction to men in real life. What is up with that! I hope this isn’t too rambling…but very open to constructive feedback and answering questions.

If it became public knowledge could you be sent to jail? If not, then why the psychoanalysis ? You like what you like so enjoy it. Eventually whatever was a curiosity will fall away and what's left is who you really are. Nuff said.

 

[eroticspank]

You seem to leave open the possibility of doing it again but why would you? Do you think that if you had more of a relationship with the person that would change things?

That is a great question. I have learned through the years to never say never. The chances of me doing it again are maybe 1%. Regarding a relationship, I think it is about doing something that does not turn me on but does give the other person pleasure. I would only do that for someone I liked or cared for.
ES

 

[LustyScribe]

Sorry, this may be wordy as I feel some background is needed. The goal is to get peoples input on why writing graphic, detailed gay erotica turns me on so much but I’m not attracted to men. I am a very oversexed person and I would say all of my fantasies and fetishes are quite far from vanilla. I would think one would wodely group them as ‘submissive’, and I write in other categories. That said, here’s some background…

I’m a very happily married 47 year old white guy. I’m quite alpha and extroverted, outwardly the typical ‘man’s man’ and would fit a lot of the New Yorker stereotypes. I work in finance, do well, like sports, comfortable in groups and can get a whole room laughing. One thing I am that may not be obvious to people right away is that I’m an Uber-liberal.

My wife and I are best friends and have mainly the same common interests. Every aspect of our relationship is a 10 except sex, which Id say is a 7-ish. I’m very attracted to her and I get very hard, the sex is just a little vanilla. I love my wife so much and like I said, sex feels good and she knows I watch a lot of porn and gives me that space. My other outlet os writing erotica - she doesn’t know that because the content would be so embarrassing! Although I don’t think she’d mind. I also have to say that I’m so happy in my marriage, I don’t feel sexual attraction towards others very much at all, if that makes sense. I jerk off a lot to porn, love a chat room, erotica, but not only would I not cheat, I’m really only interested in fucking my wife.

So with that background, my question is, what are people’s thoughts on my sexuality and fantasies/fetishes? Face to face, to this day, I never felt a sexual attraction to a man. When I was about 21 though, I discovered transsexuals and was obsessed for about 10 years. I primarily had sex with women and girlfriends, but I had a ton of closet encounters with transsexuals, mainly from the web or the NYC street walking areas (always safe by the way). Right from the start, I loved fondling and sucking their cocks, and I loved grinding our dicks together. Within a year, I got fucked and from that point on, I much preferred to bottom when I was with a special girl. All told, I would say about 12 girls fucked me 20 or so times (the number of transsexuals that bottomed for me is about the same). I sucked numerous cocks, well over 50 girls. I did love getting sucked as much as sucking, but oddly I would say with an only few exceptions, I much preferred to get anal than give. This was also the rise of internet porn and transsexual porn was my go to. So that establishes I love dicks. Very much, bigger the better, but I like them on women.

During this time I remained really attracted to women and their pussies. I love to eat and finger and please. I had girlfriends and more straight sex than transsexual encounters. When I was really horny, and couldn’t find a woman or transsexual, I did hook up with a guy or two. The thought was hot, but when they’d get there, I really wasn’t into it. I definitely didn’t want to kiss and certainly didn’t want anal either way. As I recall, we would grind and cum and maybe they would suck me. I would look for feminine looking guys, particularly Asian (Asian was my preference for cross-dressers to as they struck me as more feminine looking).

If a different fetish came into play, it was a little hotter. I remember in the mid-2000’s, I specifically looked for an Asian man to shave my genitals. He began to suck me in the shower while he groomed me and I remember us grinding to orgasm in bed afterwards. It was a little hot, but again no kissing, I was into the shaving, but not totally into the guy. I also went to a massage parlor to get massaged and shaved by an Asian man. I played with his dick through his pants, but again, I wasn’t excited like when I was with a woman or transsexual, and when I came, in all of the situations with men I just discussed, I was really done. No attraction at all and I wanted to get out of there.

This fetish morphed. I met a woman in-line through an ad where I told her I wanted to be submissive and was open to going really far. She pegged me and we found two guys for threesomes. One guy had a huge dick, and the situation was hot, but I had no desire to suck it when given the opportunity, even though in my head I yearned for forced-bi and for a woman to know (and even hotter) watch me suck a dick. This is the only person that was in my life for more than a hook up (let’s say who met my family) that knew my sub tendencies.

My main obsession today is black man- white female porn. When I fuck my wife, I picture me readying her for a black man with a huge cock and then him fucking her. Cuckolding and small penis humiliation excites me to no end. My published stories mostly revolve around these topics. Another funny thing is I have a big dick. Very thick and nearly seven inches, but when it is soft it can be pretty small and I love taking pictures of it when it is really shriveled. I’m basically into everything submissive except pain. I love big cock (especially black)/ small comparisons. Many of my gay stories involve bbc, closet cases, etc. and the protagonist is always the bottom. I also haven’t published them yet, but work in incest stories as well. Cosplay is another big fetish - hot cosplay chicks. I like curvy women and milky white skin and light hair. I don’t know, maybe I’m rambling, but it all seems like important info to get to the bottom of why I like what I like.

So that’s a good start on the background if people would be so kind to give their thoughts and input. I guess I’m asking for a free shrink. I have my own theories, but I don’t want to taint Frye responses, if I get any. But I think it’s an interesting conversation. Let me end by expressing just how fucking turned on and hard I get when I get my gay story ideas. When I’m writing them, outlining them in my head in bed or the car. I’m so fucking turned on! But I really have no attraction to men in real life. What is up with that! I hope this isn’t too rambling…but very open to constructive feedback and answering questions.

I am a straight male (insofar as I have zero attraction to masculine men) and I also write some gay erotica, first person POV, with the same perspective (submissive bottom). It was a bit of a shock the first time I wrote one for another Litster. I was like, "Where did THAT come from??" I struggled with it for a little while, overanalyzing it, and finally did what I think is the only healthy thing you CAN do.
I just shrugged my shoulders and said, "Huh. Well, that's something new."

And I stopped trying to label it, source it, explain it, understand it, limit it or choke it out. And I seem to be okay with that.
I hope that helps. Oh, and PUBLISH them!

 

[yowser]

The world of attraction, arousal and imagined sexual activity is nearly infinite. For me, from a fairly vanilla background and set of experiences, a great deal of enjoyment can be had by written experimentation. All manner of places, people, behaviors can be indulged and explored, and this site is a fantastic playground for just this sort of endeavor.

You empty your head (hopefully productively), toss it out to the readership, who let you know how it goes, make some friends, and thus gather a new appreciation for the kaleidoscope of carnality.

I've invented stories, relived chances not taken, found imagined love interests, invested them with agency and alluring attributes, and love the notion of keeping the written juggling balls in the air as long as possible. I urge you to write, which is marvelously instructive, and publish.

Beats closet life, by a large margin.

 

[Cardinal]

You're turned on by cock but not by men. This probably isn't too uncommon, you like the sex pf a cock without the romance of a man. Embrace it.

 

[Cardinal]

Sorry, this may be wordy as I feel some background is needed. The goal is to get peoples input on why writing graphic, detailed gay erotica turns me on so much but I’m not attracted to men. I am a very oversexed person and I would say all of my fantasies and fetishes are quite far from vanilla. I would think one would wodely group them as ‘submissive’, and I write in other categories. That said, here’s some background…

I’m a very happily married 47 year old white guy. I’m quite alpha and extroverted, outwardly the typical ‘man’s man’ and would fit a lot of the New Yorker stereotypes. I work in finance, do well, like sports, comfortable in groups and can get a whole room laughing. One thing I am that may not be obvious to people right away is that I’m an Uber-liberal.

My wife and I are best friends and have mainly the same common interests. Every aspect of our relationship is a 10 except sex, which Id say is a 7-ish. I’m very attracted to her and I get very hard, the sex is just a little vanilla. I love my wife so much and like I said, sex feels good and she knows I watch a lot of porn and gives me that space. My other outlet os writing erotica - she doesn’t know that because the content would be so embarrassing! Although I don’t think she’d mind. I also have to say that I’m so happy in my marriage, I don’t feel sexual attraction towards others very much at all, if that makes sense. I jerk off a lot to porn, love a chat room, erotica, but not only would I not cheat, I’m really only interested in fucking my wife.

So with that background, my question is, what are people’s thoughts on my sexuality and fantasies/fetishes? Face to face, to this day, I never felt a sexual attraction to a man. When I was about 21 though, I discovered transsexuals and was obsessed for about 10 years. I primarily had sex with women and girlfriends, but I had a ton of closet encounters with transsexuals, mainly from the web or the NYC street walking areas (always safe by the way). Right from the start, I loved fondling and sucking their cocks, and I loved grinding our dicks together. Within a year, I got fucked and from that point on, I much preferred to bottom when I was with a special girl. All told, I would say about 12 girls fucked me 20 or so times (the number of transsexuals that bottomed for me is about the same). I sucked numerous cocks, well over 50 girls. I did love getting sucked as much as sucking, but oddly I would say with an only few exceptions, I much preferred to get anal than give. This was also the rise of internet porn and transsexual porn was my go to. So that establishes I love dicks. Very much, bigger the better, but I like them on women.

During this time I remained really attracted to women and their pussies. I love to eat and finger and please. I had girlfriends and more straight sex than transsexual encounters. When I was really horny, and couldn’t find a woman or transsexual, I did hook up with a guy or two. The thought was hot, but when they’d get there, I really wasn’t into it. I definitely didn’t want to kiss and certainly didn’t want anal either way. As I recall, we would grind and cum and maybe they would suck me. I would look for feminine looking guys, particularly Asian (Asian was my preference for cross-dressers to as they struck me as more feminine looking).

If a different fetish came into play, it was a little hotter. I remember in the mid-2000’s, I specifically looked for an Asian man to shave my genitals. He began to suck me in the shower while he groomed me and I remember us grinding to orgasm in bed afterwards. It was a little hot, but again no kissing, I was into the shaving, but not totally into the guy. I also went to a massage parlor to get massaged and shaved by an Asian man. I played with his dick through his pants, but again, I wasn’t excited like when I was with a woman or transsexual, and when I came, in all of the situations with men I just discussed, I was really done. No attraction at all and I wanted to get out of there.

This fetish morphed. I met a woman in-line through an ad where I told her I wanted to be submissive and was open to going really far. She pegged me and we found two guys for threesomes. One guy had a huge dick, and the situation was hot, but I had no desire to suck it when given the opportunity, even though in my head I yearned for forced-bi and for a woman to know (and even hotter) watch me suck a dick. This is the only person that was in my life for more than a hook up (let’s say who met my family) that knew my sub tendencies.

My main obsession today is black man- white female porn. When I fuck my wife, I picture me readying her for a black man with a huge cock and then him fucking her. Cuckolding and small penis humiliation excites me to no end. My published stories mostly revolve around these topics. Another funny thing is I have a big dick. Very thick and nearly seven inches, but when it is soft it can be pretty small and I love taking pictures of it when it is really shriveled. I’m basically into everything submissive except pain. I love big cock (especially black)/ small comparisons. Many of my gay stories involve bbc, closet cases, etc. and the protagonist is always the bottom. I also haven’t published them yet, but work in incest stories as well. Cosplay is another big fetish - hot cosplay chicks. I like curvy women and milky white skin and light hair. I don’t know, maybe I’m rambling, but it all seems like important info to get to the bottom of why I like what I like.

So that’s a good start on the background if people would be so kind to give their thoughts and input. I guess I’m asking for a free shrink. I have my own theories, but I don’t want to taint Frye responses, if I get any. But I think it’s an interesting conversation. Let me end by expressing just how fucking turned on and hard I get when I get my gay story ideas. When I’m writing them, outlining them in my head in bed or the car. I’m so fucking turned on! But I really have no attraction to men in real life. What is up with that! I hope this isn’t too rambling…but very open to constructive feedback and answering questions.

I get this, being turned on by cock and not a man is probably pretty common.