How do you know

[zombiesteve96]

Sorry if this isn’t the right place to ask or post I’m new to this and nervous as hell even typing this. I’m 24 years old I’m still a virgin, I’m just wondering on how you know when you’re ready for sex. I’m never been in a relationship and never had the urge to get into one. I get a lot of flak from my family and the few friends that I do have of not getting into any of it and I don’t have anyone I really discuss with this to.
Any insights I’d appreciate it and again sorry if this isn’t the right place to post or ask.

 

[Acktion]

Sorry if this isn’t the right place to ask or post I’m new to this and nervous as hell even typing this. I’m 24 years old I’m still a virgin, I’m just wondering on how you know when you’re ready for sex. I’m never been in a relationship and never had the urge to get into one. I get a lot of flak from my family and the few friends that I do have of not getting into any of it and I don’t have anyone I really discuss with this to.
Any insights I’d appreciate it and again sorry if this isn’t the right place to post or ask.

If you don't want to, then never.

While statistically rare, asexuality is a real phenomenon.

There is nothing wrong with someone who feels no sexual urges any more than there is something wrong with someone who has blue eyes or red hair, both also statistically rarer.

Nor, if this is you, should you ever feel that you somehow have to be sexual because someone else, anyone else, tells you you should.

 

[stickygirl]

Don't be guilted into something you don't want by other people's expectations. It's your life, not theirs. There are sub/reddits for asexuality that would be worth checking out and finding that you're not alone - or weird

 

[littlecordelera]

You will know when you are ready for sex. There will be no question. The desire haunts your thoughts, and if you don't satisfy that desire, the urge only grows more demanding.

You will know.

 

[Athalia]

Sorry if this isn’t the right place to ask or post I’m new to this and nervous as hell even typing this. I’m 24 years old I’m still a virgin, I’m just wondering on how you know when you’re ready for sex. I’m never been in a relationship and never had the urge to get into one. I get a lot of flak from my family and the few friends that I do have of not getting into any of it and I don’t have anyone I really discuss with this to.
Any insights I’d appreciate it and again sorry if this isn’t the right place to post or ask.

You're ready for sex when you want it, and can do it without negative consequences to the physical
or emotional health of anybody else.

If you're interested in a real relationship, it's when you're ready to take on the emotional responsibilities of that relationship. But there's nothing that says you have to have a relationship if you don't want one. You are free to define relationships as you please: sexual, platonic, comrade, business, whatever.

If your family and friends have a problem with that, it's their problem, not yours. It's your life to live as you please. You only get one life, so make it comfortable for you.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

Agreed with all of the above.

It’s your life. Live it for you, not somebody else’s expectations. The only question is whether or not you are happy this way.

Good luck.

 

[yukonnights]

If you don't want to, then never.

While statistically rare, asexuality is a real phenomenon.

There is nothing wrong with someone who feels no sexual urges any more than there is something wrong with someone who has blue eyes or red hair, both also statistically rarer.

Nor, if this is you, should you ever feel that you somehow have to be sexual because someone else, anyone else, tells you you should.

I'd add to what Acktion said that there are also "Demisexual" people who have to have an emotional connection before the sexual desire part kicks in. In short, these folks just can't get into a casual fling, etc. As everyone has said, you just need to be yourself — but it's good to ask questions like this to get a broader understanding.

 

[human_male]

I agree with what everyone said about not letting other people pressure you.

I'd also like to welcome and encourage you to post here. It must be awful having questions and not having anyone to ask.

 

[Mariepsylckr]

Sorry if this isn’t the right place to ask or post I’m new to this and nervous as hell even typing this. I’m 24 years old I’m still a virgin, I’m just wondering on how you know when you’re ready for sex. I’m never been in a relationship and never had the urge to get into one. I get a lot of flak from my family and the few friends that I do have of not getting into any of it and I don’t have anyone I really discuss with this to.
Any insights I’d appreciate it and again sorry if this isn’t the right place to post or ask.

Agree with everyone. You will know if you're ready for sex. and if nothing really excites you sexually, that's ok too. nothing wrong with that. Don't get pressured by other people. It's your body, your life. Get into an (intimate) relationship for the right reasons and society cannot dictate to you what those are.

 

[oneblueye]

hey...

Sorry if this isn’t the right place to ask or post I’m new to this and nervous as hell even typing this. I’m 24 years old I’m still a virgin, I’m just wondering on how you know when you’re ready for sex. I’m never been in a relationship and never had the urge to get into one. I get a lot of flak from my family and the few friends that I do have of not getting into any of it and I don’t have anyone I really discuss with this to.
Any insights I’d appreciate it and again sorry if this isn’t the right place to post or ask.

STOP THE FEAR..., FIRST.

the fear of the answers, you might give yourself concerning the questions that you THINK need answering.
You only need to ask yourself 'one question' (ok, it might turn into a series of questions) and answer it truthfully to yourself.

AM I HAPPY?

if you are, go no further at this time...