Dirty campers meeting a girl - story worth completing?

[la_ruche]

Reaching out to you all here trying to get a or if I should spend time completing a story that’s been sitting as a draft in my computer for some time.

Story is set in a remote part of a NP during autumn. An MF couple (both with bi tendencies but now living mono hetero) are out for an extended hike in backcountry, experienced and with good equipment. Hiking the backcountry they come across a girl with only her backpack since her tent got destroyed by a bear. Weather about to turn for the worst so they invite her in their 3-person tent for the night.
The aromas and scents of the three persons in the tent turns the situation more sexual and the stranger, not knowing the couple’s bi-tendencies, comes out as homosexual triggering the wife’s bi-side. Meanwhile, the husband has been sexually aroused by the scents and smells of everyone and really don’t mind what the girls’ attractions may lead to…

It’s currently focused around their dirty bodies and gear more than the actual sex and I’m thus curious to know what you think the audience here would think of such story.

Thanks

 

[DarkSollat]

Depends on how do you present dirt and smell.

About the former - are they filthy or smudged?
About the latter - do they stink, or rather their smell is strong and musky?

In other words - is this fetishised dirt, or they may not be the cleanest?

 

[la_ruche]

I’d imagined the kind of musk you get from a three or four day hike (that I have experience myself). If you’ve been hiking with other people you sort of don’t notice their smells or your own but in this story the new girl comes around.

 

[DarkSollat]

I’d imagined the kind of musk you get from a three or four day hike (that I have experience myself). If you’ve been hiking with other people you sort of don’t notice their smells or your own but in this story the new girl comes around.

This is not what I was asking for.

Consider those two description. Which is more like your story?

Desc1: Glancing at her, he indeed noticed that she was on a trail for long. Her once white clothes were dark grey, and her body covered in bruises and smudged with dirt. He also smelled the musky aroma of her sweat, and saw a droplets of perspiration on her skin. It shouldn't have made him horny, but here he was, with a raging hard-on in his short. She looked and smelled like a huntress on a run, and it made her amazingly attractive.

Desc2: She was dirty, oh she was. Like a pig. Her skin was all covered in mud, and she stunk so much that he could smell her from a mile. It shouldn't have made him horny, but here he was, with a raging hard-on in his short. Damn, he thought, her pussy must have been filthy. Oh, yes, I'd gladly eat the mud from her ass.

 

[la_ruche]

Mmmmm…
More like:
As they settled inside the tent, she (i.e the “stranger”) on the far side and wife in the middle, he noticed the new scents in the air. A musky, sweaty scent filled the tent as she removed her fleece jacket and showed her long sleeved shift. “Sorry”, she said. “Two days without washing myself, hope you don’t mind”.
He watch in amazement as she removed shirt, exposing a sports bra, perfectly covering her petitie breast. The bruch in her armpits made him stiffen up and as she removed her trousers flashing a pair of boxer panties before slipping into her sleeping bag he knew he wouldn’t get much sleep this night.

 

[DarkSollat]

Doesn't seem gross, I think it may work.

 

[la_ruche]

Hope I can sign you up fro beta-reading…

 

[Rob_Royale]

Unless your idea is too far out here, it will find its audience here. Your idea isn't too far out. There are plenty of people turned un by strong scents. My wife is one of them. If I've been working outside all day, there's almost zero chance of me getting a shower before she's on me.

Write the story, and use the tags well. Don't worry about it, people will read this. Submit it.

 

[la_ruche]

Unless your idea is too far out here, it will find its audience here. Your idea isn't too far out. There are plenty of people turned un by strong scents. My wife is one of them. If I've been working outside all day, there's almost zero chance of me getting a shower before she's on me.

Write the story, and use the tags well. Don't worry about it, people will read this. Submit it.

Thank you for that encouragement!

 

[DarkSollat]

Hope I can sign you up fro beta-reading…

Not really. English isn't my first language so I'm not the best choice. Can't help with grammar e.g.

 

[Rustyoznail]

Funny, I was thinking about something similar for the sports story challenge. A couple (not sure yet of the make up) enter a weekend rogaining/orienteering hiking competition.

Your story would definitely appeal to an audience here. As Rob suggested good tags will help, but also come up with a good title and grab line to get peoples attention.

Depending on when you have it done, I'd give it a read. Send me a PM when you're ready. I'm Australian, so I'm sort of ok with English.

 

[la_ruche]

Depending on when you have it done, I'd give it a read. Send me a PM when you're ready. I'm Australian, so I'm sort of ok with English.

Thanks. Will do!