Are we born with our kinks? Or do we develop them?
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ksmith475
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Daddy/ baby girl
naughtoldperv
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I think that we all have these secret [but suppressed] kinks and desires that get triggered by images, experiences or situations. Some stick/some slide off.
I've observed my own kinks evolve in that manner throughout my long life, always changing and evolving.
I've observed my own kinks evolve in that manner throughout my long life, always changing and evolving.
RockyMountainMan2
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I was born with a truckload of kinks, and I've spent a whole lifetime developing them.
Sounds like the journey of a successful life to me!
RockyMountainMan2
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Oh fun! I've been wanting to try that!
RockyMountainMan2
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Yes! For those of us brave enough to explore them! I agree, I would have to say most of them stick, but I've let a few slide off. I also remember some kinks presented to me when I was younger and not ready for them. I met a lady who wanted to be my slave about ten years ago. I loved the sex part of the relationship, but she wanted me to bathe her, comb her hair, dress her, feed her etc.... It was too much for me. I think I would be ok with it now. Of course if she were here now she'd mostly wear the bikini I developed...which is simply two band aids and two corks haha
MysteryMan2014
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Possably. Maybe I have just reached a point where I am more comfortable in exploring things and less concerned about what others think.
RockyMountainMan2
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It makes me think of Leonardo Da Vinci, he believed the sculpture was inside the rock, he had to chisel it out to rescue it.
Astroman72
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I lean more towards them being innate, or at least developed really early on.
For me, the specific things that really excited me at age 18 are still about 90% of the things that I like now, some 30 years later. My sexual desires haven't changed much over time.
For me, the specific things that really excited me at age 18 are still about 90% of the things that I like now, some 30 years later. My sexual desires haven't changed much over time.
nature or nurture
well, as a psychologist and a counselor, i have studied this subject most of my life.....both in the context of sexuality as well as other aspects of the human psyche
what i generally conclude is this: i do believe that we do have certain genetic dispositions.....which make us more or less sexual, more or less open to discovery or experimentation, and perhaps geared towards certain proclivities more than others
when it comes to specifics though......i believe it is about our experiences, the things we have witnessed, the things that triggered some form or eroticism or arousal within us......and i would venture that more times than not, we are at a loss as to why a certain thing so appeals to us.....
as an example....i have never really understood the foot fetish....yes i think a girls feet can be cute.....certain pedicures can be attractive.....but....neither make me aroused nor do i find myself fantasizing about a girls feet
on the other hand....i very much love everything about a girls panties....and i generally want to see any girl in her panties and in most cases would rather see a girl in her panties than naked...….but why? is it because my sister ran around the house in her panties as we were growing up and had a beautiful ass? or is it just that panties appeal to me? the why of it all is the interesting part ….all i know is....show me a room full of girls in their panties and i will be a happy camper.....back when pic collecting was in vogue....i probably had 5000 of the most beautiful panty pics imaginable...…
but other kinks go much deeper....incest......or beastiality…...as examples.....why are they so hot to that person? years ago i was somewhat reviled by some of these sorts of topics but i have come to realize.....that they are just means to an end.....what a person needs to get themselves aroused....etc.....who is to judge?
anyway, it is a fascinating topic and subject.....and one that is studied by many people with little clear results...…
you all have as good a chance of understanding it as anyone else!
well, as a psychologist and a counselor, i have studied this subject most of my life.....both in the context of sexuality as well as other aspects of the human psyche
what i generally conclude is this: i do believe that we do have certain genetic dispositions.....which make us more or less sexual, more or less open to discovery or experimentation, and perhaps geared towards certain proclivities more than others
when it comes to specifics though......i believe it is about our experiences, the things we have witnessed, the things that triggered some form or eroticism or arousal within us......and i would venture that more times than not, we are at a loss as to why a certain thing so appeals to us.....
as an example....i have never really understood the foot fetish....yes i think a girls feet can be cute.....certain pedicures can be attractive.....but....neither make me aroused nor do i find myself fantasizing about a girls feet
on the other hand....i very much love everything about a girls panties....and i generally want to see any girl in her panties and in most cases would rather see a girl in her panties than naked...….but why? is it because my sister ran around the house in her panties as we were growing up and had a beautiful ass? or is it just that panties appeal to me? the why of it all is the interesting part ….all i know is....show me a room full of girls in their panties and i will be a happy camper.....back when pic collecting was in vogue....i probably had 5000 of the most beautiful panty pics imaginable...…
but other kinks go much deeper....incest......or beastiality…...as examples.....why are they so hot to that person? years ago i was somewhat reviled by some of these sorts of topics but i have come to realize.....that they are just means to an end.....what a person needs to get themselves aroused....etc.....who is to judge?
anyway, it is a fascinating topic and subject.....and one that is studied by many people with little clear results...…
you all have as good a chance of understanding it as anyone else!
BiAsianGirl
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I think we develop them.... My fantasies have normally been very specific with respect to the person I am seeing at the time and consequently have varied massively.
Ilovetoeatsperm
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Definitely developed mine over time. I would never have wanted to get fucked up the ass or eat my cum when I was younger. Also never would have wanted a hard spanking. Now with the help of my wife I been able to explore all different sorts of kinks landing on the anal cumeating and spanking ones. The journey has been grand.
RockyMountainMan2
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Upon reflecting my past and this question, I am realizing that some kinks evolve. For example, when I was younger I liked to hold my lady's hands down above her head when I was fucking her, then it went to bed restraints and blindfolds. Then.....hmmm we'll have to see lol
blackmohammed
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We are all born with kinks but they are very broad like wanting a cock whore to be desperate to get your cock in them.
When we mature and gain experience we alter and refine our kinks to be more acceptable to our life style, a cock whore can real make your life hell if the desperation causes them to follow you around all day or if they are not really enjoying it but its just a coping mechanism for them.
Once we have enough experience and we have refined our kinks to suite our lives they evolve into Our real kinks that make us happy and unashamed.
When we mature and gain experience we alter and refine our kinks to be more acceptable to our life style, a cock whore can real make your life hell if the desperation causes them to follow you around all day or if they are not really enjoying it but its just a coping mechanism for them.
Once we have enough experience and we have refined our kinks to suite our lives they evolve into Our real kinks that make us happy and unashamed.
de_valmont
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I think our personality determines the direction of our kinks, but if and how they develop changes and develops over time. And my kinks changed during my life time, but I did not change basic trend lines.
Jada59
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That could be.
LupusDei
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I also think it is a combination of many factors.
There just the body mechanics to start with, the very biology will have impact. But I think, that's mostly dismissed in context of this thread as it is not questioning general sexual preferences and such.
I can deconstruct most of my specific kinks to certain childhood experiences easily. I had always been very self-observant and over-analytical and had very clear view about certain things in as early age as seven at very least. I was born old (and still learning to be a kid), grow up wild and free to myself, but also always knew I need to invest conscious effort to understand other people emotions (despite it seemingly coming natural for most others). So I did, quite literally, observed them forming, along with nearly immediate understanding what is and isn't considered 'mainstream.'
Then, it always is possible to ask, would those same experiences affect me in that particular way if I was wired differently to begin with? Of course not. There always is multiple solutions to the simplest of situations, and even more possible interpretations afterwards. Some of my important experiences wouldn't be registered as noteworthy or even plain out couldn't happen at all for someone else, even in exact same circumstances.
For that matter, as an would be author, I can't understand how to realistically explain any non-standard character, especially their sexuality, without visiting those formative experiences. But that's a random rant, sorry.
But then there is thinks that just are. Notably, the dark side, the truly demonic desires, mostly repressed and stored away in a sarcophagus of titanic proportions.
Past lives? Oh yeah, I have memories. Or incredibly detailed scenes of imagination, constructed on unconsciously acquired information. Including all the deviations from contemporary science to spice things up (and I do believe we systematically undervalue ancients (and no, no aliens necessary)). There always is multitude of possible explanations, in absence of decisive prof none necessary better than others. Random synapses in my brain producing those impressions, reinforced by reviews and inadvertently refined over time as my knowledge grows is just as believable. Human memory is not a static medium (but you all of course know that).
There just the body mechanics to start with, the very biology will have impact. But I think, that's mostly dismissed in context of this thread as it is not questioning general sexual preferences and such.
I can deconstruct most of my specific kinks to certain childhood experiences easily. I had always been very self-observant and over-analytical and had very clear view about certain things in as early age as seven at very least. I was born old (and still learning to be a kid), grow up wild and free to myself, but also always knew I need to invest conscious effort to understand other people emotions (despite it seemingly coming natural for most others). So I did, quite literally, observed them forming, along with nearly immediate understanding what is and isn't considered 'mainstream.'
Then, it always is possible to ask, would those same experiences affect me in that particular way if I was wired differently to begin with? Of course not. There always is multiple solutions to the simplest of situations, and even more possible interpretations afterwards. Some of my important experiences wouldn't be registered as noteworthy or even plain out couldn't happen at all for someone else, even in exact same circumstances.
For that matter, as an would be author, I can't understand how to realistically explain any non-standard character, especially their sexuality, without visiting those formative experiences. But that's a random rant, sorry.
But then there is thinks that just are. Notably, the dark side, the truly demonic desires, mostly repressed and stored away in a sarcophagus of titanic proportions.
Past lives? Oh yeah, I have memories. Or incredibly detailed scenes of imagination, constructed on unconsciously acquired information. Including all the deviations from contemporary science to spice things up (and I do believe we systematically undervalue ancients (and no, no aliens necessary)). There always is multitude of possible explanations, in absence of decisive prof none necessary better than others. Random synapses in my brain producing those impressions, reinforced by reviews and inadvertently refined over time as my knowledge grows is just as believable. Human memory is not a static medium (but you all of course know that).
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Well said...thank you..
Stopokochac
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Well, I've had a foot fetish for as long as I can remember.
But I did end up developing some other kinks later in life as I got older.
But I did end up developing some other kinks later in life as I got older.
To what depths have your kinks developed..
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