Making the boards part of your play?

i read the mistress thread in the cafe first, then read your thread in the talk about people subjecting others to their play. that was my train of thought. people in the "my mistress" thread were upset with the OP for subjecting them to be apart of their play. your thread was created after that thread.

That's technically true, but misleading.

If you look at the timestamps in the "my mistress" thread, you'll see that the first post to take the "upset with the OP for subjecting them to be a part of their play" line was about six hours after I created this one.

The OP in that thread did give me a nudge to post about something that I'd been mulling over for a while, but it wasn't directed specifically at that thread or its posters. At the time I started this one, I don't think any of the stuff I was discussing here had been raised over there.

i found it to be in poor taste. you see, it happens quite frequently that people start threads about public play after people play publicly. i was responding that it really irks me when people get their panties in a wad when other people use this are as a "play" area. i have noticed, over time, that some people who post regularly in the BDSM area get very protective of this space

Isn't that true of any social space where people meet and interact, though? When people find a social circle that they enjoy, they want to keep it the way they like it. Human nature.

Can that instinct become toxic? Absolutely. Does that happen here? Yeah, I've seen it, once in a while. But some degree of protectiveness is necessary to avoid tragedy of the commons inflicted via Geek Social Fallacies #1 and #2[url].
 
That's technically true, but misleading.

If you look at the timestamps in the "my mistress" thread, you'll see that the first post to take the "upset with the OP for subjecting them to be a part of their play" line was about six hours after I created this one.

The OP in that thread did give me a nudge to post about something that I'd been mulling over for a while, but it wasn't directed specifically at that thread or its posters. At the time I started this one, I don't think any of the stuff I was discussing here had been raised over there.



Isn't that true of any social space where people meet and interact, though? When people find a social circle that they enjoy, they want to keep it the way they like it. Human nature.

Can that instinct become toxic? Absolutely. Does that happen here? Yeah, I've seen it, once in a while. But some degree of protectiveness is necessary to avoid tragedy of the commons inflicted via Geek Social Fallacies #1 and #2[url].


it was clearly a catalyst, as you stated.

i understand the protectiveness. you want to keep the troll out who seeks to harm. this thread is not about any of that. it is about people engaging in relationships, and making posts and threads about their relationships here. maybe it crosses over into online role playing, but without knowing the OP, i don't know if that is the case. what i do see is the cool kids club unwelcoming wagon. it is something i have come to expect and actually enjoy when posting on the General Board. it keeps the mouth breathers out. unfortunately, here, it keeps people out for whom this space was intended for. the rudeness and hijacking become the play of the boards. people are belittled, made to feel unwelcome. there is no report to the mod, that this thread would be served better off elsewhere. it becomes play for people who would seek to humiliate someone else. it is why people are eager to open such threads. they know the hazing is going to come, and they want to read it. it provides self righteous pleasure. the threads become a popcorn bowl, and the OP is on the platter.
 
These threads happen with some frequency and are never a good idea. I find fault with both parties, but if the “Dom” is a regular (or at least one who reads here regularly), then they know this and are deliberately attempting to throw their sub to the wolves.
 
it was clearly a catalyst, as you stated.

i understand the protectiveness. you want to keep the troll out who seeks to harm. this thread is not about any of that. it is about people engaging in relationships, and making posts and threads about their relationships here. maybe it crosses over into online role playing, but without knowing the OP, i don't know if that is the case. what i do see is the cool kids club unwelcoming wagon. it is something i have come to expect and actually enjoy when posting on the General Board. it keeps the mouth breathers out. unfortunately, here, it keeps people out for whom this space was intended for. the rudeness and hijacking become the play of the boards. people are belittled, made to feel unwelcome. there is no report to the mod, that this thread would be served better off elsewhere. it becomes play for people who would seek to humiliate someone else. it is why people are eager to open such threads. they know the hazing is going to come, and they want to read it. it provides self righteous pleasure. the threads become a popcorn bowl, and the OP is on the platter.

I see your point. I’m guilty of this, being a pot stirrer.
 
it was clearly a catalyst, as you stated.

i understand the protectiveness. you want to keep the troll out who seeks to harm. this thread is not about any of that. it is about people engaging in relationships, and making posts and threads about their relationships here. maybe it crosses over into online role playing, but without knowing the OP, i don't know if that is the case. what i do see is the cool kids club unwelcoming wagon. it is something i have come to expect and actually enjoy when posting on the General Board. it keeps the mouth breathers out. unfortunately, here, it keeps people out for whom this space was intended for. the rudeness and hijacking become the play of the boards. people are belittled, made to feel unwelcome. there is no report to the mod, that this thread would be served better off elsewhere. it becomes play for people who would seek to humiliate someone else. it is why people are eager to open such threads. they know the hazing is going to come, and they want to read it. it provides self righteous pleasure. the threads become a popcorn bowl, and the OP is on the platter.

There are some very good points made here, neci!
 
it was clearly a catalyst, as you stated.

i understand the protectiveness. you want to keep the troll out who seeks to harm. this thread is not about any of that. it is about people engaging in relationships, and making posts and threads about their relationships here. maybe it crosses over into online role playing, but without knowing the OP, i don't know if that is the case. what i do see is the cool kids club unwelcoming wagon. it is something i have come to expect and actually enjoy when posting on the General Board. it keeps the mouth breathers out. unfortunately, here, it keeps people out for whom this space was intended for. the rudeness and hijacking become the play of the boards. people are belittled, made to feel unwelcome. there is no report to the mod, that this thread would be served better off elsewhere. it becomes play for people who would seek to humiliate someone else. it is why people are eager to open such threads. they know the hazing is going to come, and they want to read it. it provides self righteous pleasure. the threads become a popcorn bowl, and the OP is on the platter.


This is quite a generalization as well.

I've been here a while and don't see the hazing, humiliation or posting for "self righteous pleasure" as much as your post indicates.

Several of us have, in the past, suggested to an OP that his/her thread might belong better in the Fetish, How To, BDSM Personals or other forums.

I've seen many posts that feel like masturbation fodder on the part of the OP answered in a thoughtful manner, giving the benefit of the doubt. Often times the OP never comes back. Or it's clear the OP never really wanted advice/suggestions in the first place.

It works both ways. Yeah, I've seen knock-down drag out fights on these boards. It's the way of the forum world. But to generalize that we all are playing at this in order to humiliate someone else is offensive. Threads aren't opened because we're meat seeking destroyers. Far from it.
 
It is actually our intention to allow the Cuckold husband to read our posts and see his wife photos. Hopefully the other readers will add their comments to the posts!!
 
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