ElectricGinger
Really Experienced
- Joined
- Sep 27, 2010
- Posts
- 204
Hey everyone,
This is my first real return to Lit after removing my pics from the pic forum.
I really wanted to see what everyone thought of this topic. Nestle and I have recently entered into a sexually open relationship and actually feel like it has strengthened our relationship in spite of the horror stories and reasons not to that everyone always hears. We actually started off of a random conversation topic. I had been snowed in during the crazy winter storm that the hit the Midwest a few weeks ago and was thus watching a lot of television A preview for the movie "Hall Pass" came on, and I asked Nestle's opinion of the concept.
We started out talking hypothetically, and both of us agreed that it's not necessarily a bad idea for some couples. At first, he said he didn't think we'd be able to do it, being head over heels in love. But when the conversation became a little more of a realistic possibility, we agreed that we could try it.
That happened on a Monday, and on Tuesday night I was headed over to a friend's house. Nestle told me to make it happen. Since then, we've both gone out to experience other people. I know that at this point we sound crazy, but it has been the most helpful thing in combating the distance (of 1,000+ miles) between us while I'm at school.
So far I've hooked up with two other people, both good friends of mine. The sex wasn't great (and was only even there with one), but the experiences themselves have been exhilarating. Both the guys knew the situation and there was no awkwardness involved whatsoever. But it was crazy to get that rush of nerves that always accompanies that first-time hookup.
I encouraged Nestle to go meet a girl. He did, at a lounge, and has seen her twice since. He said that the first time he experienced a guilty feeling when he left, and was nervous to tell me, but both times the experience has been good.
We really make this work. There are definitely rules, though:
- We always know about all hookups
- We answer any questions
- If at any point one of us is uncomfortable with it, it ends
- If any feelings come up in one of the hookups, we'll tell each other and end that particular outlet
- We talk through anything that breeds uncertainty
It's really been a liberating experience. Nestle has said that it's the most relaxing thing he can do while I'm away. Because, let's face it, neither of us are fully satisfied with the DIY method ;-)
The best part about it is that it's opened up this new level of trust and strength in our relationship. We have so much trust between us that neither of us has expressed a worry about our relationship and if someone will leave. It's born out of a desire for the other to enjoy themselves, and it's really worked. And, I've even found that hearing about his adventures is really sexy to me, and usually ends with some great phone sex
Nestle has been absolutely encouraging this whole time. He encourages me to talk to guys, to get things started, to enjoy myself and to explore, to learn about myself. And I've been supportive of him as well. It's really something that shows me that we have a really strong relationship.
So I was just wondering, what's your view? Have you tried it? Are you for an open relationship? Against? Do you think there are things we need to look into improving or that it's a mistake at all? Be completely honest with what you think about it! We welcome the input.
Sorry this was so long!
This is my first real return to Lit after removing my pics from the pic forum.
I really wanted to see what everyone thought of this topic. Nestle and I have recently entered into a sexually open relationship and actually feel like it has strengthened our relationship in spite of the horror stories and reasons not to that everyone always hears. We actually started off of a random conversation topic. I had been snowed in during the crazy winter storm that the hit the Midwest a few weeks ago and was thus watching a lot of television A preview for the movie "Hall Pass" came on, and I asked Nestle's opinion of the concept.
We started out talking hypothetically, and both of us agreed that it's not necessarily a bad idea for some couples. At first, he said he didn't think we'd be able to do it, being head over heels in love. But when the conversation became a little more of a realistic possibility, we agreed that we could try it.
That happened on a Monday, and on Tuesday night I was headed over to a friend's house. Nestle told me to make it happen. Since then, we've both gone out to experience other people. I know that at this point we sound crazy, but it has been the most helpful thing in combating the distance (of 1,000+ miles) between us while I'm at school.
So far I've hooked up with two other people, both good friends of mine. The sex wasn't great (and was only even there with one), but the experiences themselves have been exhilarating. Both the guys knew the situation and there was no awkwardness involved whatsoever. But it was crazy to get that rush of nerves that always accompanies that first-time hookup.
I encouraged Nestle to go meet a girl. He did, at a lounge, and has seen her twice since. He said that the first time he experienced a guilty feeling when he left, and was nervous to tell me, but both times the experience has been good.
We really make this work. There are definitely rules, though:
- We always know about all hookups
- We answer any questions
- If at any point one of us is uncomfortable with it, it ends
- If any feelings come up in one of the hookups, we'll tell each other and end that particular outlet
- We talk through anything that breeds uncertainty
It's really been a liberating experience. Nestle has said that it's the most relaxing thing he can do while I'm away. Because, let's face it, neither of us are fully satisfied with the DIY method ;-)
The best part about it is that it's opened up this new level of trust and strength in our relationship. We have so much trust between us that neither of us has expressed a worry about our relationship and if someone will leave. It's born out of a desire for the other to enjoy themselves, and it's really worked. And, I've even found that hearing about his adventures is really sexy to me, and usually ends with some great phone sex
Nestle has been absolutely encouraging this whole time. He encourages me to talk to guys, to get things started, to enjoy myself and to explore, to learn about myself. And I've been supportive of him as well. It's really something that shows me that we have a really strong relationship.
So I was just wondering, what's your view? Have you tried it? Are you for an open relationship? Against? Do you think there are things we need to look into improving or that it's a mistake at all? Be completely honest with what you think about it! We welcome the input.
Sorry this was so long!
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