Hello, my name is Susan. I am 18 years old and a senior in high school. I have just recently discovered the world of bdsm and have known about my submissive desires for a long time. I am very frightened and confused by everything about me and that fact that I am interested in this. I can't really talk to my parents about it and I'm afraid that my friends at school would be mortified. I also have not had any other relationships and don't have any "normal" experiences to even compare to. It all seems so new and scary yet I feel myself drawn to it. I was just wondering how anyone would suggest that you get started and actually meet others that have these interests. Also, a part of me is scared after some of the stories that I have read on this site that seem to be quite disturbing and extreme. I'd love to have more understanding of this and whether it's real and actually done. Is it safe and legal always? I have read Fifty Shades of Grey and that seems to confuse me even more. In the book, the only reason he is interested in bdsm is because he had a traumatic childhood. They make it out to seem like there is something wrong with you if you are like that and I'm wondering if that's true. Just looking for some insight. Also, could you please tell me if you are a dominant or submissive? Just want to know what perspective I'm getting! Thanks for any and all help! I could really use it and it would mean a great deal to me.