Worst dialogue ever in a porn movie?

[blobfish]

http://cdn2b.youjizz.com/videos/4/e/2/5/3/4e25306e205f4.mp4

 

[phrodeau]

That would be, "Uh uh uh, uh uh. Uh uh... uh uh uh uh uh uh."

 

[Jades]

Porn has dialog? Next it will be plots.

 

[blobfish]

Porn has dialog? Next it will be plots.

And then plot holes.

 

[fuckwaffle]

Only if there's a proad in it.

 

[oggbashan]

On an ancient video tape I had some vintage porn (early Talkie era) including a scene with a 'nun' and a dying man who wanted one last fuck before expiring.

The audio was in an Argentinian dialect, had been overdubbed into Brazilian Portuguese but you could still hear the original words (by different people) and was subtitled in English.

While the 'nun' had her mouth full of the dying man's large prick, she apparently said In Argentinian "Resurrection!", in Portuguese "This bit isn't dead" but in English the subtitle read "Hello Mort!".

Later, she was facesitting the dying man while sucking the heir's prick while he was fondling the breasts of his fiancée. Suddenly the scene changed. The dying man had vanished. The heir was being facesat by his fiancée; the nun was bouncing up and down on his erection and kissing the fiancée, both of whom were naked above the waist, and the heir seemed to say from under the bouncing ass:

"Where is the Priest?" OR "Don DON DON!" and subtitled "Where is the will?" - remarkable because he could barely breathe.

 

[Liar]

That would be, "Uh uh uh, uh uh. Uh uh... uh uh uh uh uh uh."

I take that over "EEEEeeeeiiiIIIIIEEEEeeeee!!!"

A.k.a bad asian porn.

 

[busybody..]

That would be, "Uh uh uh, uh uh. Uh uh... uh uh uh uh uh uh."

Sorta

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[blobfish]

On an ancient video tape I had some vintage porn (early Talkie era) including a scene with a 'nun' and a dying man who wanted one last fuck before expiring.

The audio was in an Argentinian dialect, had been overdubbed into Brazilian Portuguese but you could still hear the original words (by different people) and was subtitled in English.

While the 'nun' had her mouth full of the dying man's large prick, she apparently said In Argentinian "Resurrection!", in Portuguese "This bit isn't dead" but in English the subtitle read "Hello Mort!".

Later, she was facesitting the dying man while sucking the heir's prick while he was fondling the breasts of his fiancée. Suddenly the scene changed. The dying man had vanished. The heir was being facesat by his fiancée; the nun was bouncing up and down on his erection and kissing the fiancée, both of whom were naked above the waist, and the heir seemed to say from under the bouncing ass:

"Where is the Priest?" OR "Don DON DON!" and subtitled "Where is the will?" - remarkable because he could barely breathe.

Haha! Back then, that whole concept was probably very unique.

 

[oggbashan]

Haha! Back then, that whole concept was probably very unique.

Silent movie porn was universally saleable. The interleaving captions, if any, could be in any language, or several languages on one still.

When sound arrived, the porn actors had to speak, or be dubbed, in a single language.

On that particular movie, it was too obvious that those doing the action weren't doing the speaking - because it was impossible to speak with a mouth full of prick or pussy.

On another movie clip on the same video, the words were spoken in cut-glass English, like 1930s BBC announcers, with no emotion at all.

Try to imagine this dialogue in upper-class English:-

"I say, Jane, your tits are beautifully formed..."

"Why don't you proceed slightly lower, Adrian? There are more delights hidden between my thighs."

"Oh Jane, your thighs are so compelling."

"That's from the horse riding, Adrian."

She produces a riding crop and proceeds to thrash his rump soundly as he tries to lick her pussy.

That's not the actual dialogue, but as close as I can remember. I acquired the video tape secondhand when it was nearly worn out. After a few viewings the tape broke and I haven't been able to find another copy.

 

[ivantheterrible]

oh a pizza! let's fuck!
oh god, yes, yes, oh god, yes yes, faster faster, oh god yes yes..................ad nauseum.
i stopped watching porn a long time ago. it's all boring as hell.

 

[berry juice]

The last one I remember was
: schneller, schneller
: ya, ya


I now just skip forward the intro and watch only the middle of the porn video wheres noone talk.

 

[blobfish]

The last one I remember was
: schneller, schneller
: ya, ya


I now just skip forward the intro and watch only the middle of the porn video wheres noone talk.

German porn?

 

[berry juice]

German porn?

yes. ever seen one?

 

[blobfish]

yes. ever seen one?

I've seen clips. There's too much foreskin for me.

 

[berry juice]

I've seen clips. There's too much foreskin for me.

and floppy tits

it's au naturale