Why So Serious?

[princesssexci]

Harley stared at the computer with a blank look. What had just...happened? She wasn't quite certain. She sighed and went to bed, she would figure it out eventually. Maybe, when she went to the warehouse tomorrow evening. Yes, that sounded like the right idea. Besides, she could probably find some way to get back in the good graces of whomever was in charge of Arkham now that Julia Powers was gone.

 

[Ravenloft]

The moment she went to sleep, Harleen had a dream about the Joker. He was leaning in the open doorway of her apartment, wearing a blue suit and a cocked hat on his head. There was mist all around him, up to his thighs, cause these sorts of dreams, they always had mist. Probably because it made things sexier. He was holding a yellow flower, sniffing it as she approached him in her dream. As she got closer, she swore that the flower's blosom morphed into a miniature virsion of Tess's head. She was crying 'heeelp me, heeelp me.' in a tiny little voice as the joker began humming 'pop goes the weasel.' "Noooo, nooo!" The little face cried out as the Joker placed the tip of his thumb under its chin, aimed at Harley, and popped the head off its stem, sending it spinning through the air to land in Harleen's hair, like an tiny little adornment.

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen woke up screaming, sweat dripped down her face. It really shouldn't have bothered her since, Tessa had been such a bitch the day before. Tessa knew how sensitive she'd been about being called Harlequinn...or even referred to as a joke. After all, they'd been friends since highschool.

Harley sighed and glanced up at the clock. It was...midnight and now that she was awake she couldn't make herself go back to sleep. She hated when that happened. She glanced at the address written on the paper. Would ...he be there?

She shouldn't have cared after all, if she were caught with the joker she could be called an accesory. Did she really want to get herself into more trouble? She stood up and walked to the shower still unsure of what to do.

 

[Ravenloft]

As she entered the bathroom, Harleen flicked on the lights, which also turned the tiny radio she kept in there as well, to catch the morning news before work. It was one of those five minute news breaks before another thirty minute music blocks. The cool voiced local radio personality was reporting on a number of mysterious kidnappings that had occured in the last twenty four hours, advising listeners to make sure they were sure to lock their doors, as it was believed to be connected to an escaped Arkham Asylum inmate.

 

[princesssexci]

Harley paced back and forth in her room as she listened to the news report. Arkham Asylum and the convicted criminal, The Joker...those were the only two things that really stuck out to her. Then, she'd heard it..."Also, it is suspected that a Miss Harleen Quinzel is an accomplice to these kidnappings, due to the fact that it was she who...."

"WHAT?! No!!!" Harley screamed at the television set as though it could hear her. "I was not a fuckin accomplice, though it serves everyone right for not listenin to me and just letting Mistah J go...." She glared at the headlines and Commisoner Gordon who was talking.

"That's it..." She grumbled before storming out of the apartment in a huff, she didn't even pay attention to what she was wearing. Her cotton pjs which weren't really that bad but not very appropriate either. Finally, she reached the warehouse. Harley just stood there...gulping back fear, she knocked on the door.

 

[Ravenloft]

The metal door rattled on its hinges, threatening to fall off under the light knocking of Harleen's fist, before it swung open. The warehouse was dark and musty smelling inside as she nervously stepped in. Standing unseen in a pitch black corner of the room, the Joker watched her enter, his permanent grin growing wider as he silently snuck up behind her.

"Boo!" He shouted as he grabbed ahold of her, one hand pinning her arms to her sides, while the other clamped over her mouth.

 

[princesssexci]

Slowly, Harley walked in. The warehouse was dark and she'd nearly changed her mind until suddenly someone grabbed her by her arms, then covered her mouth muffling the scream that she was making. Good god she was about to die. What's a girl to do?!

She gave a small sigh of relief when the joker spoke, or rather said boo. Harley wasn't even certain why she'd come here, after all she was already being accused of helping the joker get free. When he let her go, she gave tried to glare at him.

"You tricked me..." She couldn't help but pout,"Now everyone's after me. Whats a girl to do?"

 

[Ravenloft]

"No, I helped you... Remember? They're only out to get you because you're better than they are. Than they ever could be. Why, you're practically an angel." The joker said with a sly grin as he sidled up to her again. "And thats what love is all about right? Two people... Helping each other, making each other better then they would be if they were alone? I know you had your rules back there, in the asylum, but now... Hehehe! Now you're free Harley. Hehehe! You're free to be you!" The Joker was so close to her, she could feel his breath on her face as he looked down into her eyes.

 

[princesssexci]

Love? Had he just mentioned love? She gulped but didn't dare say anything, she wasn't quite certain what to say. What did you say when a madman declared his love for a girl who had been psychiatrist. Wasn't there some kinda word for that or something. She tried to rack her brain for that word.

God, she couldn't even think of the word, not when he was standing so close to her. Her heart pounded quickly as she opened her mouth to say something, then shut it because Harley's mind had gone blank. Finally, after numerous attempts to say something but having nothing come out of her mouth she took a deep breath and spoke.

"L-love?" she stammered, "A-and what do ya mean, become the...real me?"

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker smirked and nodded at her as she repeated the word 'love' as if it were a question all by itself. "What do I mean? I mean that the old Harleen Quinzel is dead, she needs to be, so frail and weak, so apt to let snot nozed bitches push her around, and make her life a living hell. Its a wonder she grew up so well adjusted. Hehehe! This is your CHANCE, Harley Quinn, your CHANCE to get them back! Your CHANCE to have the last laugh!" The Joker said as he rushed over to a wall of circuit boards, throwing levers each time he shouted the word CHANCE.

Lights buzzed to life with each throw of a switch, illuminating the depths of the factory/warehouse. The massive room was lined with large fat rendering vats. And above each one was a chained and struggling woman. Above each one was a dandilion. Julia noticed Harleen just as she spoted her hanging there.

Julia's eyes went wide for a moment with fear, as if she thought Harleen was a captive now too. That is until the Joker came up behind her and wrapped his arms about her intimately, one resting low on her stomach, the other fondling her cheek. "Surprise." He whispered in her ear as he played with her curly hair.

Julia's eyes closed to acusatory slits as she started to swing from her chain bindings. She was gagged, but managed to muffle out. "Hoo! En Noo hit! Hoo kelfed hid!" The Joker tilted his head as if he were trying to decipher an alien language, then laughed. "Hehehe! I think she's accusing you of helping me escape, puddin. You're not going to put up with that, are you?" The Joker asked, whispering softly a mere inch from her ear. He left Harley weak kneed as he rushed over to the fat rendering vat controls, displaying them as if they were the grand prize on the price is right.

 

[princesssexci]

Harleen's breath was caught in her throat at the thought of being something than what she was. Part of her had to agree with the Joker though, why not destroy Harleen Quinzel, she was already ruined in her line of work, no one seemed to trust her even though she really had nothing to do with the Joker being as brilliant as he was.

"Yes..." she murmured, barely noticing the lights come on. She did however notice the woman, Julia hanging from the rope. A slight gasp escaped her lips. "Julia..."

He did it, he'd really done it. She couldn't believe it! Julia's eyes widened in fear...of her or for her she wasn't quite certain and she'd nearly jumped when the Joker wrapped his arm around her intimately, almost possesively like he was silently saying, she's mine now.

Instantly she pulled away after muffled angry words from her. "Don't!" She snapped at the joker then turned to Julia, "I swear Julia I'm not workin for him. I didn't help him out I swear it. I was tricked! He made me think the pill was swallowed!!! I swear I wouldn't risk your life or anyone else's for some mad man who has some obsession for me!"

 

[Ravenloft]

"No... No... No... No... NO!" The Joker whispered at first, growing louder and louder with each one as he stormed over to where he'd lever Harley standing. He whiped out a razor blade and grabbed Harleen by her wrist, dragging her around so that his front pressed firmly into her back. "Its... All a part of the plan, see? You've gotta make them pay." He reached up and caressed her cheek with one hand as he pushed the point to the razor into the flesh of her other cheek, attempting to draw a little heart shape there. "For our love, Harley Quinn, for our love to be real."

 

[princesssexci]

Harley winced in pain and tried to keep from crying because she was certain that if tears streamed down her face. She didn't want to seem weak in front of the joker. Her attempts were useless though because soon tears were falling down her cheeks.

Julia looked like she was going to be sick and for a brief moment gave Harley a look of concern but when she saw that Harley hadn't made any attempt to move away from the Joker, she gave her a look of disdain, of disappointment. Finally, harley did move away and bit her lip. "W-what love?" She stammered.

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker stared Harley in the eyes for several seconds before he pulled out a remote control and pointed it up into the air, hitting a button.

"And have you seen the way they look at each other?" It was Tessa's voice. "I swear its like she's stoned or something whenever she's around him Miss Julia. I think you really need to take Harleen off the Jokers case." "Is that all, Tessa?" Julia's voice asked. "Are you sure that there is nothing else you would like to tell me?" "Well... She DID say something to me earlier today... She told me to go fuck myself... Th-thats not like her, we... We were friends... Until she just... Snapped on me." "I see... If there is anything else... Anything at all that would link her to that mad man's escape, you would tell me, wouldn't you Tessa? I'm afraid that... Harleen may well be going to jail in the next few days."

The Joker hit the pause button on his remote. "Harley... Don't you see... I'm all you've got... Everyone else... Think's you're a joke."

 

[princesssexci]

Harley bit her lip as she listened to the recorded voices on the tape. Her own supposed best friend had ratted her out, thats how Julia knew or thought she knew what was going on between her and the joker. Sure, she had been bitchy the other day but...she was upset about losing her position it had nothing to do with Tessa.

She was so confused. This was all getting to be a bit too much for her. The room suddenly started to spin. Harley could hear the jokers words echoing in her mind, even as he spoke them...they seemed to go on and on...

"Harley... Don't you see... I'm all you've got... Everyone else... Think's you're a joke."

Everyone else thinks you're a joke...you're a joke...you're a joke.

Then, she fainted.

 

[Ravenloft]

The Joker saw Harley waivering on her feet as her eyes rolled up. He watched as her knees gave way and she started to fall. Without thinking he caught her before she struck the ground and eased her gently to the concrete floor. "Well... That was fairly unexpected..." He said as he slid one hand under her legs, the other under her shoulders. He picked her up with a grunt and looked around the large room. "You'll have to excuse us ladies, Harley and I won't be a moment. Please, feel free to... Hang around! Hehehehe!"

The Joker took Harley to a private office which was cool and well ventilated, so that the smell of rendering fat and the ambient heat of the vats wouldn't cause her undue nausea. She remained unconcious long enough for the Joker to strip her of her cloths and put her into a cool, figure hugging costume of his own design. Once that was done, he poured a tall glass of ice cold water, turned, and threw it in her face, to wake her. "Good morning puddin." He said as she sputtered and spat out water.

 

[princesssexci]

In her little dreamland things weren't so stressful, it was full of flowers and butterflies,cotton candy, and...cold water? She sputtered trying to spit out the water that had gone down her nose. She looked around, trying to figure out where she was. For a second, it took her moment to remember what had happened.

"Good morning puddin."

Her eyes flicked towards the joker. She didn't say anything, her eyes went down to her new attire. It was a Harlequinn costume and for a second her eyes narrowed at the red latex material. If this was his idea of a joke...it wasn't very funny. Wait, how did she....

"W-who put this on me?" She asked, faint pink splotches covered her cheeks.

 

[Ravenloft]

"I did, of course, whats the matter? Don't you like it? I had to go through about twenty tailors before I found one who could make it for me. Its a one of a kind you know, designed to let you breath but steal ever one elses breath away." The Joker grinned as he handed Harley a towel to dry her face while looking down her body.

 

[princesssexci]

Harley flushed at his comment. That was the whole reason she didn't wear outfits that clung to her, not since highschool. She wiped her face off with the towel than another blush formed on cheeks as she noticed the joker staring at her hard.

"No, its not that I don't like it." Okay, that was a lie. "Okay, maybe I don't like it that much..." she admitted, "But also, um...I mean..." she stammered. How exactly was a person supposed to tell a guy not to undress her without her permission.

"Well, its kinda rude to undress someone without them knowin it." she finally said.

 

[Ravenloft]

"Is it now? Well then..." The Joker began, scowling as he circled around behind her, catching her by her shoulders. "I'll just have to take it BACK!" He spat, as he pulled her forcefully against his body, moving his hands up over her breasts. He pinched the zipper of the costume between thumb and index finger and tugged it down, opening the front up to just below exposing her breasts. "Just to let you know..." He whispered hotly in her ear. "I couldn't have you wear something you disliked, now, could I..."

 

[princesssexci]

Oh jeez! Now she'd upset him...that didn't bode to well for her now did it. Obviously, if she was going to have dealings with the joker she couldn't speak her mind, which was something she was sort of used to. She gasped as her breasts were pulled out of the suit.

"N-no, i-it isn't that I don't like it like it..." she stammered, it was red, which wasn't a bad color on her. "I-it's just missing something?" She said questioning her own logic. "like...a...hat?" She said still questioning herself. "Y-yes it's missin a hat. Ya know one of those silly h-harlequinn hats. That'll really make em laugh."

She gulped and tried to cover her breasts. "I....I do like it." She stammered once more. "It was really.....s-sweet of ya to think of me. I-I couldn't ask for a betta present." Harley gave a nervous laugh and forced a smile.

 

[Ravenloft]

"It does seem like its missing something, doesn't it?" The Joker mused as he continued to hold her tightly against his body, his left hand caressing her breast while his right drifted down under the costume, causing it to slowly unzip as his fingers slid down between her legs. "Hmm, I think you're right, its missing the hat. Its going to have to come off for such a large alteration..." He whispered in to her ear again, this time the heat wasn't angery, but passionate.

 

[princesssexci]

Harley shivered against the heat of his breath biting her lip. This was wrong, soo soo wrong. He shouldn't be touching her, not like...this. Only lovers did things like this and she hadn't even known him long enough to call him a lover. A slight gasp escaped her lips. "W-what large alteration would it have to come off of..." she asked, partially curious, partially trying to make conversation. It was keeping him from killing her and she only worried about this because, he had just snapped at her for not liking an outfit.

 

[Ravenloft]

"Well, I'm no tailor, but obviously, the hem along the neck will have to be completely reworked..." The Joker whispered as the thumb and fore finger he had drawn her zipper down with now pinched the nipple of her left breast. His right hand slid lower, between her legs, two fingers caressing the lips of her sex intimately. He drew them upward, unsheathing the sensitive nub of her clit before he gently rested his middle finger atop it and rubbed in a slow sensual circle. "And upon reflection, the zipper being in the front... Could cause problems... I will just have to find another tailor for you, puddin."

 

[princesssexci]

Harley flushed as her breathing became slightly more rapid, the more the joker touched her. Yes, she could see how the zipper in the front could cause a whole buncha problems. It was already causing problems as it were. By now her face had a look of shock before she gasped feeling his finger circle her clit sensuously. "Y-yeah I could see how that could cause problems..." she said breathlessly.