Why I left Fetlife

[DVS]

I have a FL account as well as a Lit account. I'm DVS in both. I don't visit either much any more, but I don't see the need to delete them.

 

[surjourner]

Giggle away... And yes, your interpretation was most likely correct


no kidding...

Most days I have to wonder, are those of us who are on meds the only ones who realize that we all need to be on meds??

In an insane world only the sane appear insane.

 

[Touch_Me_Daddy]

Wife and I left too

 

[pizoli18]

I have to agree with you on your critique of FL - I myself was also on the site for around a year or two until it became more of an entertaining distraction which yielded no fruit or substance.

Getting out in your community and finding those who can relate to your fetishes-mindset- with education and growth is a better journey ..my two scents

 

[Scentofawoman]

I'm so confused. Where is one writing stories on Fet?


Fet is the only way to find out real life activities like parties and munches.

Thank god for Fet. It's opened up a whole new world for me to explore.

 

[Lascivity]

I've found Fetlife absolutely fine. It's great for staying in touch with people and finding events. As with any social network there are a lot of idiots, but after a while you get good at filtering them. I've had more positive experiences from it than I have had negative.

 

[KnightInShiningArmour]

So the last bastion of my hope is already screwed up before I even had the chance to really try it?

 

[Pocketshaver]

What exactly does Fetlife against theft?

the only thing that fetlife does against "theft" of anything is on pictures. You cant fucking save a photo you see on that site. Meaning, if you save it to your computer, you only generate a link to that particular page with photo on it in your hard drive.
Half the time the link doesn't work anyways.

Fet life is NOT about writing a story. Its about meeting people for sex and posting photos of your latest sexy purchase. it was never meant to be more then that. It gets its revenue by charging people to watch member submitted videos.

Ironically they get past the American system by forcing people to send 150$ for a year membership to videos, and 350$ for lifetime of website access. ALL in the form of gift cards to places like victorias secret to post office boxes in Cyprus and british Columbia.

Its 85% perverts in the form of married women cheating on spouse, and young girls selling their ass for student loan help

 

[sub2femdom]

My impression of Fetlife after several weeks of trying to navigate and meet people like me was that the site has only two types of users:

Girls looking for a payday
Men dumb enough to pay them

Real kinksters - move to the back of the bus, don't engage, don't support each other..

It was just too ponderous. I joined a swinger site instead, and it's much better, with exception to the forums, which I come here for!

 

[Pocketshaver]

My impression of Fetlife after several weeks of trying to navigate and meet people like me was that the site has only two types of users:

Girls looking for a payday
Men dumb enough to pay them

Real kinksters - move to the back of the bus, don't engage, don't support each other..

It was just too ponderous. I joined a swinger site instead, and it's much better, with exception to the forums, which I come here for!

don't know what site you went to for swinging, but all the ones ive seen have been gay guys with a fake non existent wife trying to lure single men in for a gay try out..

pm me your fet profile, could be fun to see

 

[Chiquita6623]

I finally deleted my Fetlie account last night and I have zero regrets. The site was great for the time being, but more and more it started to look like Disneyland, with all the kids waiting in line for the next best ride, the candy (all the photos of porn stars/erotica models) pouring out of the money making sky like a waterfall. And all the kids (men and women, both sexes equally guilty) always high on sugar: More nudes please and keep those stupid BDSM stories to yourself. So Fetlife turned from a kinky Facebook to a highly overrated porn-site, cause you have to pay for the same mediocre videos you get to watch for free online.

Yes, I admit , I used to enjoy writing there, but now every time I post a story, I get 0 comments after the story and 190 wanna-fuck-******** messages in my private Inbox. Seriously???

I'm angry, because I wasted so much time in there to build a network of fans, and in the end all my fans betrayed me for some nude photos of women, who use robots to respond back to their messages.

In the end, it's all good, because I found this awesome site where people actually read and are less superficial.

Thank you for letting me vent.

Demi

I am happy that I left FetLife 2 years ago then. But then again at the time there were a lot of people on there just to hook up. There were a lot of writers and photographers that I use to follow cuz I liked their work. That is the main thing that I miss from being on the site.

 

[Bramblethorn]

huh, weird how almost every post from this account happens to be plugging porn websites or herbal supplements or some other product...

 

[PaxNurgle]

^sounds like a good use of the "Report post" icon to me.

 

[sweettalk4u]

I was on for years and wrote there too. I discovered the lifestyle there and really enjoyed my time on fet. But most of it was crap. I was able to meet fine people and learn a lot about myself in spite of it. I think it was because it was so big. I deleted both mine over a year ago.

 

[Bramblethorn]

^sounds like a good use of the "Report post" icon to me.

Already did

 

[Classicgal]

I am in total agreement.
I already suspended my Fetlife membership once.
When the credit card company string armed them into censoring the site, and the flood of kids believing 50 Shades is bdsm invaded. I have friends there though amongst the few remaining people with any actual real world credentials.
I am telling everyone I know from there about Literotica now though.
I have a love/hate thing with Fetlife.

 

[Chiquita6623]

I said I wouldn’t do it, but I’m back on Fet. I guess I couldn’t stay away...

 

[newhere2learn]

I have to agree with you on your critique of FL - I myself was also on the site for around a year or two until it became more of an entertaining distraction which yielded no fruit or substance.

I lasted a year, left twice and went back. Exactly the above reasons.

 

[Subi1977]

My wife left Fetlife a year ago for more or less the same reasons. No real interaction with normally thinking adults. But many fuck requests from people who thinks a hotwife is an easy lay..

 

[LauraWilling]

I had a FetLife account, and maybe still do as I never closed it. I just haven't gone back after a few years. To many kids or what I suspected were kids, to many people would contact me then never follow through after a lot of near meaningless chat or promise;s and claims they never backed up.

 

[TheLM]

I use fetlife (not for dating).

If you’re getting catfished, you aren’t using technology right.

 

[AnnieLit]

Its 85% perverts in the form of married women cheating on spouse, and young girls selling their ass for student loan help

You are kidding, right?? By this logic Lit is 100% perverts -- ALL the guys I chat with in PMs are married. Never met here even one that was single and we had anything to talk about. I am sure some of the idiots that go into trash after the first message must be single, but they are not given the chance to tell me about it.

 

[Nivasi1989]

I've been off/on both FetLife and this site since 2009? and things have changed significantly there, but not so much here. I keep coming back to Literotica because of the stories and the people. Fetlife I've left for up for 3 years and didn't even miss it or think about it. I tried again six months ago and abandoned it again already.

And I agree. No one wants to enjoy what they have. That's true of both sites, and any dating site you're on today. At least here, people already know my kinks when we talk, whereas dating sites are iffy at best and you might get insulted, or worse, for revealing anything and waste your time (shrug).

 

[amofiga]

I personally like Fetlife for its intended purpose. It's more of a playground for exhibitionists and possibly swingers or wannabe swingers that enjoy posting pictures and videos more than discussions. There are discussion pages for just about every and any topic you wish and it's easy to search for a particular fetish you may want to follow from ass licking to watersports and everything in between. Unfortunately, most of the video is 10 second snippets from a cell phone and there are also a lot of "pros" who want to sell you access to better video. It's not a dating site and not intended to be from what I've seen. Lit has better stories but Fet is easier to follow particular people that may be of compatible interest to your own. Each site has its advantages and disadvantages.

 

[RudyGardet]

It is what you make of it

I definitely have mixed feelings about the social aspects of both Fetlife and Literotica, but to me I guess it's about knowing what you're getting into. Like many people hand noted here, they're are a ton of fakes, flakes, and assholes on these sites (definitely more of all of those on Fet than Lit) but there are real people there too. The problem is sorting the wheat from the chaff when you're searching for something/someone, or getting noticed when you want to be found.

When i first stepped in to this online world I was quickly discouraged and disappointed by the lack of responses from my efforts. I'd see a post and think "wow it's like they're talking to me!" and I'd craft a witty charming response, often after actually reading their Fet profile (how I wish Lit had better profiles) or exploring their past posts or writing here on Lit. I hit that send button just KNOWING that they will read my message and feel me and respond immediately and we'd click and spend countless hours chatting and cumming together.

WRONG! So many unreplied to messages. Or even worse get a reply and go back and forth once or twice and then silence and curious why. It really bothered me at first - still does sometimes - but then I thought about how immense these communities are, and then began to understand how many asshole guys are out there making things toxic for everyone. Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of women who play games and clearly many many many out to make a buck, but I think it's hard to be a real person here and be able to wade through all the shit hoping to find a gem.

However, I also believe there are gems out there. Just like IRL fate and comparability work their sometimes opposing magic to keep us apart or bring us together. I guess you could call it "a numbers game" in that you have to put yourself out there a lot because finding a match is never easy, but I know that it can happen. I've had some of the best relationships of my life - sexually, romantically, and even just good friends who I can share stuff with that I can't with anyone else IRL. That's why I'm still here - and there if anyone's curious, RudyGardet on Fet.

Good luck to each of you in your search for whatever...