Why Daddy?

[Rubnesque]

I've never understood what is such a turn on for guys/Doms to hear their girls/subs call them Daddy. Or why some girls get off on calling their boyfriends/Masters this. I was once requested to call a lover this and being the game girl I am, I did. Nothing. I had no response other than a slight desire to gigle, which of course I stifled, but still.

What does it do for you?

 

[catalina_francisco]

I can appreciate the nurturing aspect of it but it just is not for me as a relationship, especially a primary relationship. In my relationships I am not looking for the parent/child dynamic, especially where sexuality is involved, nor can I get into the idea of being stuck in a role where I was expected to remain a child or childlike and never grow up. Fortunately F has an equal dislike for the idea so we don't have to deal it.

Catalina

 

[lil_slave_rose]

I've never understood what is such a turn on for guys/Doms to hear their girls/subs call them Daddy. Or why some girls get off on calling their boyfriends/Masters this. I was once requested to call a lover this and being the game girl I am, I did. Nothing. I had no response other than a slight desire to gigle, which of course I stifled, but still.

What does it do for you?

that's a hard question, and you're probably going to get a whole lot of answers i'll start, or atleast try..

for me, it's about the nurturing nature of my Daddy, a 'role' to go into when i need Him to be more the nurturing type Dominant. i find myself calling Him Daddy alot more when i'm sick, or when i'm tired (or when i'm sick AND tired?) i love knowing i am Daddy's cherished princess...for alot it's not about age play, for me and Master alot of it is age play. i love the playfulness of it, it's a 'break' so to speak from the 'slave' role i normally am in. wow this is more complicated to explain than i thought because i'm never out of my slave role either and i say role for lack of a better word. i can't really pinpoint any one thing that is a huge turn on for me about calling Him Daddy. *shrugs* i know someone else will have a better explanation than this. i feel like i'm rambling and not making any sense..lol....

 

[lil_slave_rose]

I can appreciate the nurturing aspect of it but it just is not for me as a relationship, especially a primary relationship. In my relationships I am not looking for the parent/child dynamic, especially where sexuality is involved, nor can I get into the idea of being stuck in a role where I was expected to remain a child or childlike and never grow up. Fortunately F has an equal dislike for the idea so we don't have to deal it.

Catalina

i do understand what you're saying, but for a lot of people it's not about acting child like and never growing up. there are some who it's all about that nurturing aspect. as i said Master and i do 'play' the roles, but it is defiantly not our 'relationship' so i guess i'm really not a good one to post on this subject *shrugs*

 

[Netzach]

I only grok it when it's Bears or Leathermen or mega Butches involved. The minute it's a het thing I get confused, but that's just my bias.

 

[Rubnesque]

that's a hard question, and you're probably going to get a whole lot of answers i'll start, or atleast try..

for me, it's about the nurturing nature of my Daddy, a 'role' to go into when i need Him to be more the nurturing type Dominant. i find myself calling Him Daddy alot more when i'm sick, or when i'm tired (or when i'm sick AND tired?) i love knowing i am Daddy's cherished princess...for alot it's not about age play, for me and Master alot of it is age play. i love the playfulness of it, it's a 'break' so to speak from the 'slave' role i normally am in. wow this is more complicated to explain than i thought because i'm never out of my slave role either and i say role for lack of a better word. i can't really pinpoint any one thing that is a huge turn on for me about calling Him Daddy. *shrugs* i know someone else will have a better explanation than this. i feel like i'm rambling and not making any sense..lol....

Thanks for attempting to explain it from your own experience. I guess I've never been in such a total relationship as you share that would even tempt me to call a man Daddy. On the other hand, I guess using the endearment, "baby," isnt' much different from the nurturing aspect of "daddy." Especially as I use it alot during sex.

 

[Rubnesque]

I can appreciate the nurturing aspect of it but it just is not for me as a relationship, especially a primary relationship. In my relationships I am not looking for the parent/child dynamic, especially where sexuality is involved, nor can I get into the idea of being stuck in a role where I was expected to remain a child or childlike and never grow up. Fortunately F has an equal dislike for the idea so we don't have to deal it.

Catalina

For me, whenever I imagine calling a man "daddy," I think of movies where pimps are called that by their hoes. Or that overused line "who's your daddy?"

 

[insertcutename]

I asked my Daddy if I could call him that because Sir didn't feel right to me. It's hard to explain why Daddy feels right, though , so I really didn't add much to this thread.

 

[catalina_francisco]

i do understand what you're saying, but for a lot of people it's not about acting child like and never growing up. there are some who it's all about that nurturing aspect. as i said Master and i do 'play' the roles, but it is defiantly not our 'relationship' so i guess i'm really not a good one to post on this subject *shrugs*

True in part, but regardless, just by titles alone it puts the focus on a parent/child type relationship more so than 2 adults interacting on an adult level. I get just as much, if perhaps not more appropriate for me nurturing in our relationship where we are both adults who remain in adult roles and yet I can turn to him as an adult for support, guidance, advice when I am in need of it and it is not made to fit as if I were a child with no or little lifeskills to draw on and needing to be treated as a child more so than a fully functioning adult. I am not trying to be patroninsing or inflammatory, it is just from others who speak of their Daddy relationships, when they need nurturing etc., it is usually done in a way you would when speaking or comforting a child, not an adult, and for me that does not give me the type support I need to continue to grow as a person and to feel safe and secure. I like being treated as a woman, held as a woman, and reasoned or spoken with as a woman more so than assuming a role of a child or childlike woman looking for Daddy's attentions. It suits some, just not me. As much as people say it is not age play or age related, I have never heard anyone in a Daddy relationship speak of their sub behaviour as reflecting that of an 18 yo or older, IOW an adult child who is grown, (more often the little schoolgirl or younger in pigtails and often babydoll clothing, innocent and vulnerable vision) so it still goes back to that parent/child dynamic for me, not adult to adult.

Catalina

 

[HouseToy]

Daddy/princess is new to me and working out quite well. I would have never thought I would like it but I do. This isn't a full time thing.. and quite often we are just friends or a normal couple. My major misconception is that I thouight it was something incestual implied... but it really isn't.

 

[Daddyslilpet]

True in part, but regardless, just by titles alone it puts the focus on a parent/child type relationship more so than 2 adults interacting on an adult level. I get just as much, if perhaps not more appropriate for me nurturing in our relationship where we are both adults who remain in adult roles and yet I can turn to him as an adult for support, guidance, advice when I am in need of it and it is not made to fit as if I were a child with no or little lifeskills to draw on and needing to be treated as a child more so than a fully functioning adult. I am not trying to be patroninsing or inflammatory, it is just from others who speak of their Daddy relationships, when they need nurturing etc., it is usually done in a way you would when speaking or comforting a child, not an adult, and for me that does not give me the type support I need to continue to grow as a person and to feel safe and secure. I like being treated as a woman, held as a woman, and reasoned or spoken with as a woman more so than assuming a role of a child or childlike woman looking for Daddy's attentions. It suits some, just not me. As much as people say it is not age play or age related, I have never heard anyone in a Daddy relationship speak of their sub behaviour as reflecting that of an 18 yo or older, IOW an adult child who is grown, (more often the little schoolgirl or younger in pigtails and often babydoll clothing, innocent and vulnerable vision) so it still goes back to that parent/child dynamic for me, not adult to adult.

Catalina

I am in a Daddy/sub relationship and it is most definately not me being treated as a child. If it were we'd have problems. I call Him Daddy because it fits better and feels better to us than Master. However, I am all woman.

Where have you ever seen me post in the manner you mention above?

 

[catalina_francisco]

I am in a Daddy/sub relationship and it is most definately not me being treated as a child. If it were we'd have problems. I call Him Daddy because it fits better and feels better to us than Master. However, I am all woman.

Where have you ever seen me post in the manner you mention above?

I didn't mention specifics Dixi, but for the most part on this and other sites there is mention of times when they dress, speak or do something to their appearance to appear childlike, and also of interactions which are based on the sub being very much not an adult for the most part but deferring to their Daddy as a child would except for those times when they drop out of role to maintain an everyday existence and deal with everyday issues which need dealing with. Sorry if it offends anyone as it is not my intention, but from my own heart I have one father and I do not want to refer to my lover/Master/life partner as Daddy for any reason as it doesn't fit for us nor is it something either of us can find personal value in for ourselves just as some people don't want or find value in an M/s relationship for themselves...for us that is what we wanted and has always worked for us, for others it doesn't. I am happy it fits for you both...it is all about our being individual with our own unique needs and kinks, not about trying to be all things to all people and trying to make one size fit all...difference is just that, different, not necessarily wrong, bad, or needing justification or defending.

Catalina

 

[Daddyslilpet]

I didn't mention specifics Dixi, but for the most part on this and other sites there is mention of times when they dress, speak or do something to their appearance to appear childlike, and also of interactions which are based on the sub being very much not an adult for the most part but deferring to their Daddy as a child would except for those times when they drop out of role to maintain an everyday existence and deal with everyday issues which need dealing with. Sorry if it offends anyone as it is not my intention, but from my own heart I have one father and I do not want to refer to my lover/Master/life partner as Daddy for any reason as it doesn't fit for us nor is it something either of us can find personal value in for ourselves just as some people don't want or find value in an M/s relationship for themselves...for us that is what we wanted and has always worked for us, for others it doesn't. I am happy it fits for you both...it is all about our being individual with our own unique needs and kinks, not about trying to be all things to all people and trying to make one size fit all...difference is just that, different, not necessarily wrong, bad, or needing justification or defending.

Catalina

Cat, No one is asking you to embrace the Daddy/sub relationship. However, I don't see my relationship any different that a Master/slave relationship. Does not a slave also defer to her Master, while maintaining an everyday existance and dealing with everyday issues that need dealing with?

What I was responding to most in my last post was this...

As much as people say it is not age play or age related, I have never heard anyone in a Daddy relationship speak of their sub behaviour as reflecting that of an 18 yo or older, IOW an adult child who is grown, (more often the little schoolgirl or younger in pigtails and often babydoll clothing, innocent and vulnerable vision) so it still goes back to that parent/child dynamic for me, not adult to adult.

That is why I said what I said. Because I have never represented myself on these boards or any other boards as anything but an adult in an adult relationship. I have also specifically posted that for us this is not about age play or age related.

Anyway, I agree whatever fits for us shouldn't matter to you or anyone else. If Daddy/sub relationships don't interest you, why bother with these threads?

 

[callinectes]

Sigh..here we go again.

Take a look at this thread.

The first couple of pages of that thread basically consists of people saying ewww. A few pages into the thread some real discussion starts.

I call my dom Daddy. He is not my father figure, we do not engage in age or incest play, I do not dress up in little girl clothes and act like a child. It is a simply a name that suits us. Master or Sir as a title sounded forced and odd to us.

 

[Rubnesque]

Anyway, I agree whatever fits for us shouldn't matter to you or anyone else. If Daddy/sub relationships don't interest you, why bother with these threads?

I am assuming you are aiming that comment at me. Oh, Dom/sub relationships do interest me as I've been in two. This thread is merely an exercise of my curiousity as to *why* using that appellation comforts/titillates women and men

 

[Rubnesque]

Daddy/princess is new to me and working out quite well. I would have never thought I would like it but I do. This isn't a full time thing.. and quite often we are just friends or a normal couple. My major misconception is that I thouight it was something incestual implied... but it really isn't.

Thank you for posting.

It's an interesting dynamic that arises here.

I call my dom Daddy. He is not my father figure, we do not engage in age or incest play, I do not dress up in little girl clothes and act like a child. It is a simply a name that suits us. Master or Sir as a title sounded forced and odd to us.

I do see your point. Daddy is just as much a title as Master and Sir, though without the necessarily childlike role-playing involved (for most at least). I mean, spanking is one of the first forms of punishments most children learn from their daddies and mommies (pre-1990s/2000s PC BS), yet as adults we incorporate it into our sexual play and don't think anything of it.

So then I ask this: Is "Mommy" used by male subs in the same manner as "Daddy" seems to be for female ones?

 

[Daddyslilpet]

I am assuming you are aiming that comment at me. Oh, Dom/sub relationships do interest me as I've been in two. This thread is merely an exercise of my curiousity as to *why* using that appellation comforts/titillates women and men

You assumed wrong.

 

[His_pita]

For me, being His little gurl is the most incredible relationship I've ever had. I can be myself and the inner child is encouraged to come out and play. He takes care of me and gives me the love, discipline, support, and guidance that I require. I feel safe, understood, and challenged. My Daddy expects a whole lot out of His gurl and I work very hard not to disappoint Him.

For us Daddy/little gurl in no way means age play. We might role-play some kind of age stuff but that is strictly for fun and on a limited basis. I don't think of Him as paternal. Yet he is my Daddy. I also call him Master and Sir depending on the mood or circumstances. Daddy/little gurl is just one facet to our relationship. It falls under the WIITWD and that means it's a unique relationship that works for us because it's ours.

 

[babiesmiles]

I am and consider myself completely adult under all points of view , and most of the time a tough one, both in professional and everyday life .

That's why I don't feel myself deminished in any way if occasionally and sometimes more often my Master likes to be called Daddy with all the consequential stuffs . On the contrary I truly enjoy it.

For us it doesn't have any incest connotation at all , it is completely parted from every father- doughter dynamic and from every conscious age roleplay .

But as I have rather childlike features , an innate lil princess attitude ( ok people .. free to cry havoc and shoot on me but I can't help it !!!) , I am of small size and with a (apparently) vulnerable and harmless appearance Master feels it natural to assume that Daddy ( meant as old and wise caring guide) attitude with me . Add to it we have some years of age difference and I really use to wear ponytail in my spare time and you will have the answer .

It is unquestionable it has lot to do with the caring and nurturing side of the relation more than any kind of roleplay, cause in every relation I have had (all vanilla ones before him ) this protective side has always been a strong component of them.

In fact even in this moment while Master and me are passing a quite difficult time trying to reset our relationship and ourselves back, after a serious clash we had a few weeks ago , I feel he still protects me, he cherishes me , I feel I can lean on him and rest , never derogating from my being an aware grown up , but allowing myself the exquisite , heady , naughty , cheecky luxury to put down the gun and to be simply his honey little girl .

But that is a very personal point of view .

 

[Evil_Geoff]

I am just beginning to explore this dynamic, none of my previous D/s relationships were with anyone who was interested in exploring this. The submissive that janey and I are involved with has expressed an interest/desire to develop that type of relationship with me.

The first time "Daddy" slipped out of her in play, I was struck by the power it had. It was whispered, almost unconsciously, inaudibly muttered. And there was a definite shift in energy that I felt between us. There was a surrendering in her. There is no other word to describe it. She crossed an emotional barrier with that barely spoken word, and she took a step closer to me.

I called her my precious little girl and rocked her in my arms. It just seemed to be the right thing to do.

There's definitely more to explore here!

 

[Chicklet]

But I *have* a Daddy!

If a man ever asked me to call him Daddy, I have to admit that I'd say NO. My father is my daddy, and I would feel like I was disrespecting him to give someone else that title.

 

[Linyari]

Okay, I recently had a HUGE discussion with my husband/dom about this the other night. Why I found it arousing. It's not part of our play because it's not something he's into and I'm not sure I'm ready to incorporate that particular fantasy into our play. It's almost like my private masturbation fodder. *grin*

But it's not necessarily the idea of having sex with your father. I have ZERO desire to have sex with my father. The idea makes me gag. I loved my father, but totally not in that manner. I have a stepfather and I was sexually abused by him, but trust me, my memories of those years is not arousing in any sense of the word. It more inspires feelings of blind panic and being trapped and helpless than anything else. Which is not where I want to go while "playing".

So...what does it for me? Well, the taboo nature of it, of course. But it goes further than that. It's almost like the ultimate Master. In Victorian times, fathers had complete control of their daughters and often inspired fear in them. There is some schools of thought that say it was a sexual thing back then (without the sex). Your father is theoretically responsible for so much. He is supposed to teach you so much about life. He's supposed to be your first...love...in that non-kinky sense. In your early life and sometimes in later life, he controls everything about you.

But at the same time, he's Daddy, not Father. Daddy implies that he loves you, unconditionally. Father is stern and demanding, Daddy recognizes that while you need to be disciplined, you need to be loved as well.

He is the one Master you always submit to as he is the one Master that holds so much of who you are in his hands. It's not so much that people want to have sex with their fathers, but that they want to have that ultimate Master and that some men want to BE that ultimate Master.

 

[BiBunny]

If a man ever asked me to call him Daddy, I have to admit that I'd say NO. My father is my daddy, and I would feel like I was disrespecting him to give someone else that title.

I was about to type these exact words, then I saw where you beat me to it. I have a definite interest in age play myself (not as an all the time thing, but an occasional one). I still can't imagine calling him "Daddy," even when do play the little-girl-in-a-pink-skirt-and-pigtails game. Daddy is my Father. Master is my Master. Sometimes, when we do age play, I call him Sir as any good little Southern girl would call a man who's older than she is, but it feels awkward. I have been looking for some alternative titles for him for this scenario, but everything I think of just sounds kind of goofy.

 

[ownedsubgal]

well my Master is also my Daddy, but it's not a "role" we play or slip in and out of, it's simply who we are, something that came naturally to us when we came together. yes, it is a parent/child dynamic, but remember that even a 40 yr old is someone's "child". with us it is not about my acting or being childlike, but rather being an adult woman still needing the guidance, nurturing, unconditional love, and discipline that only a Father can provide. while i am dependent on him in all ways and he encourages this (meaning, i'm not and never will be an independently functioning adult), i am still expected and encouraged to grow. He does not baby me or pamper me, him being Daddy doesn't change the fact that i am property, and that my life's purpose is to serve and please him. sometimes he can be very harsh, even cruel. other times he can be gentle, tender and even playful. i adore, worship and fear him. i need and crave him. for us it's all a natural part of our Father/daughter (yes i did say Father, because he is that, my father figure, and not simply "Daddy") dynamic.

 

[Little_Kitten]

Hm... I have a strong resentment to the word "daddy" I would never be able to call someone that without my stomach turning over, and I think it's partly because it reminds me of my own dad, and if I were to think of him in a love-scene or some other scene, It would just be too freaky... Also I watched this really weird movie about a pedofile calling himself "spankdaddy" at an early age, which i also think had an influence on the word for me. I just really find the word weird, but I do like the dynamic in such relationship.. i've never tried it, but i think it would fit me well in small quantities as I do like the feeling of someone acting all fatherly on me, and me being the lil vulnerable child that i am...

Hmm... Just thought Id get that out... *wanders off, humming a song*