Who should make the first move in lovemaking?

[PHANTOM5875]

Dakota has inspired me to start a new topic! How do you feel about who should make the first move in lovemaking? I have friends who feel it should always be the man while others feel the woman should also be sexually agressive in the relationship. Your thoughts?
PHANTOM

 

[Hullo_nurse]

I think whoever is "hornier" and wants it should make the first move.
That way neither the man or the woman feels that they always have to be the one to make the first move. Unless, of course, one is always hornier than the other...

 

[Dakota]

hmmmmm.... I am usualy more agressive than my partner but I don't think that its any one person's job. I agree that its who ever is hornier. I am always hornier so its usualy me in my relationships ;-)

[This message has been edited by Dakota (edited 11-18-1999).]

 

[Anothername_9]

I saw the topic title and jumped right in to post the very same answer hullo_nurse gave us: Whoever is hornier. Easy, non-sexist, non-judgemental, natural. Spontaneity is infectious (well, most of the time) and siggy other will be right with ya soon.

 

[XXplorher]

DCL, you're looking like the voice of reason. Perception noted and message recieved. You wise, brotha!

How's the flick goin? Are you on the set? Maniacal or educational?

And while I'm here: I dug the 'sneeze' scene in Jazzy Girl. Particularly, lighting her cigarette - very clever. Yup (hmm... what's that smell? hehehe) Foreshadowed that nicely as well, eh.

[This message has been edited by XXplorher (edited 11-19-1999).]

 

[Cg1369]

I agree with hullo_nurse & anothername_9. Who makes the first move isn't important. To me, who makes the LAST move is important. A male should always satisfy his partner before he's satisfied. Just my personal opinion.

 

[Anothername_9]

...or, better yet, cg--simultaneously...yeah!

 

[DCL]

I believe the parents should meet with a qualified counselor, discuss the options, and arrange a series of "meetings", and then, after sex education classes with a local priest, the happy couple should mutually initiate a properly supervised sexual tryst.

Or, whoever's hornier.

 

[Cg1369]

YEA!!!! You're right anothername. Doesn't happen often enough, but when it does, it's bliss!!!!!! I'm new on the site, so ya'll bear with me. Eventually I'll get up to speed.

 

[*Eve*]

When it's time to get busy, it doesn't matter who makes the first move.

 

[PHANTOM5875]

Great answers! But, let's raise the bar a little....what do YOU do when YOU'RE ready to get busy and your special one is not in the mood? How do you light their fire?
PHANTOM ;-)

 

[Arkane]

Phantom et al
I get milady in the mood by nibbling on her ear or kissing her neck very lightly. Since we both work weird goddamned hours we do reach a point sometimes when we both don't feel like doing much of anything to anyone (including each other). But, when I am in the mood and she isn't I start the earlobe nibbling and that puts her in the mood real quick. Otherwise we usually both instigate the "foreplay".

Arkane

 

[Richo90]

The woman should always make the first move. This way men will know when she's horny and wants it, as most men are always willing and ready!

 

[PacificBlue]

Most of the men I've met like to be "in charge" and don't like it when a woman initiates. I find that interesting compared to the number of men who say they wish their partners would initiate more.

Confusing.

 

[Kat-44]

well, in my opinion, it should be whomever is the horniest........If your horny, why sit around and wait for the other to make a move, go for it

 

[Spinaroonie]

White always makes the first move. ALWAYS.

 

[Laurel]

checkmate.

 

[Oilpainter]

The last I checked this is the 21st century. Whichever partner feels the urge to initiate love making should initiate it.

 

[Wrong Element]

The last I checked this is the 21st century. Whichever partner feels the urge to initiate love making should initiate it.

In defense of PHANTOM5875, it wasn't the 21st century when this thread was started.

But seriously, in my own life these decisions tend to be made on a level that is implicit, but clearly mutual.

 

[Laurel]

In defense of PHANTOM5875, it wasn't the 21st century when this thread was started.

hehe

But seriously, in my own life these decisions tend to be made on a level that is implicit, but clearly mutual.

That's generally a good thing, especially the mutual part.

 

[Never]

Define, ‘the first move’.

 

[hogjack]

Agreed

The mutual part is good. There are no clear rules on "initiation" but, depending on a relationship, there are plenty of obvious clues that can be made...


I'll tell you methods that don't work or of which success is inconsistent when trying to intitiate a physical tete-a-tete:

- Paper/Scissors/Rock
- Thumb wrestling when one partner has long nails whiich can lead to serious injury
- Consulting the Magic 8-ball
- Cribbage
- Using askjeeves.com
- Relying on a "Cubs victory" to seal the deal

 

[Laurel]

Define, ‘the first move’.

The one where you pull their clothes off, bend them over the chair, and...

Oh, sorry. I got carried away. Those are the first TWO moves.

 

[glamorilla]

I like it when the guy makes the first move.

 

[Private Vasquez]

I think the little voices should make the first move.