When/should kink go too far?

[Somethingdifferent74]

(1st off wasn't sure where to post this "BDSM Talk" or "Fetish" please move as seen fit)

So my question when is a kink too far/too much? Should it even be? Is it permitted? I don't judge other people's interests. They do what they do as long as their partners are aware and practicing the fundamentals of... S.S.C., R.A.C.K. and or P.R.I.C.K. who am I to judge. I don't have to engage, entertain or even agree with what others do or like but... and it's a big BUT I may have run into something of concern.

A No limit sub. Now we all seen or maybe even been a "no limit" sub (reminding everyone not judging posing opinions and thoughts). No limits means that the individual given control can bring bodily harm or bring permanent marks or even worse. I will say in my own opinion and beliefs everyone needs/should have limits. (Don't want to divulge too much of what limits and all since so broad).

My point for this thread...

A sub reached out to me and wanted me to take her to Mexico and have her arms and legs removed so she would be a complete quadriplegic to be used solely for "sexual/toilet" pleasure.

I didn't engage as it's not my interest or kink. Which is my free will.

Your thoughts?

 

[PaxNurgle]

There are two outcomes for someone who says they are a sub with no limits:
1) They won't be taken seriously
2) They will.

Neither outcome is good. In the case of the would-be sub mentioned above, I think it is one thing to revel in these type of extreme fantasies, but quite another to actually experience them for real life. And in this case, you are talking about a sub who wishes to have permanent and lasting damage done to her. Things like this- it is one thing to be tied up for a day and used in the manner described above, but to become a permanent quadriplegic- that is irreversable, and what happens when the fantasy wears off and the scene ends, and they come out of their erotic head-space? Because it will end, nobody (even the most eager sub-frenzied newbs) can be in that type of sub-space forever. This is where a dom needs to be discerning- to devise a scene where a sub may have their fantasies fulfilled, but in a safe way, in a manner that does not cause permanent harm or risk of long-term injury.

In other words, a dom needs hard limits even if the sub claims they do not.

 

[TarnishedPenny]

Safe, Sane and Consensual. Limb removal fails that test. Good call on your part.

Is there a hard line? I don’t think so. Each case has to be judged on its own merits.

 

[Bighammerfucker]

Okay honestly I was sorta in a position like that a while back, where I was really willing to go to nearly no limits for this guy I was playing some intensive D/s with. I mean, not nearly to the level you mentioned OP, but to the level where I was willing to do a lot of things I am glad, looking back, that I didn’t do, and some of which I did and do regret.

I honestly can tell you from my experience anyway that it’s not a mentally “sound” state. Like I said, I have a -lot- of regret. I can’t tell you what it was that led to me being in such a state but yeah no I wasn’t in any position to be opting to do the things I wanted to do. I think there does come a point with people where you have to begin to question, for both your safety and theirs, if they are in a state of mind where they are able to make safe, sane judgements and decisions.

I wasn’t. Looking back, I wasn’t. I don’t know -why- I wasn’t. But it was bad enough that I do wish someone had been looking out for me, and I’m also glad things didn’t go worse than they did. So yeah I mean it’s not something everyone wants to hear, that maybe you need to evaluate their mental state, but sometimes it really is necessary to do so. Safe SANE and consensual, after all, meaning you need to be in a state of mind where you can truly consent.

 

[IrisAlthea]

I think there does come a point with people where you have to begin to question, for both your safety and theirs, if they are in a state of mind where they are able to make safe, sane judgements and decisions.

I think that is important even without the
”sane” issue because even with things that don’t seem very out there to others, you still want your partners consent to be risk aware and informed.
Should you draw a line when it comes to what you want to be part of? Absolutely, yes.

As for the things that make you think ”should this even be allowed?” though, I think it becomes way more difficult. There is no shortage of people who are way to happy to draw that line for others, for my taste.

As for the wannabe quadriplegic…
It might just be me getting really old, but to me it seems like a lot of people who talk about things like that are living in fantasy/roleplay and are talking about it as if it was reality - way more than there used to be.
Hentai quadriplegic is rather far from real life quadriplegic and I say that having spent a few summers dressing bed sores and even an amputee wound once.
I’m not saying that the people who want this for real don’t exist though.

 

[stxjimmy]

(1st off wasn't sure where to post this "BDSM Talk" or "Fetish" please move as seen fit)

So my question when is a kink too far/too much? Should it even be? Is it permitted? I don't judge other people's interests. They do what they do as long as their partners are aware and practicing the fundamentals of... S.S.C., R.A.C.K. and or P.R.I.C.K. who am I to judge. I don't have to engage, entertain or even agree with what others do or like but... and it's a big BUT I may have run into something of concern.

A No limit sub. Now we all seen or maybe even been a "no limit" sub (reminding everyone not judging posing opinions and thoughts). No limits means that the individual given control can bring bodily harm or bring permanent marks or even worse. I will say in my own opinion and beliefs everyone needs/should have limits. (Don't want to divulge too much of what limits and all since so broad).

My point for this thread...

A sub reached out to me and wanted me to take her to Mexico and have her arms and legs removed so she would be a complete quadriplegic to be used solely for "sexual/toilet" pleasure.

I didn't engage as it's not my interest or kink. Which is my free will.

Your thoughts?

You're so right. Cutting off someone's arms and legs would be going too far.

Best to stick to arms or legs.