When do you tell the truth about Santa?

[Whispersecret]

I almost got caught this year when my 7 year old asked me if elves were real. Thinking he was talking about elves, like fairies and gnomes, I said no.

His reply was, "But not Santa's elves, right, Mommy? They're real."

You can imagine my mental scream.

"OH! Of course, Santa's elves are real. I thought you meant the other kind of elves."

He believed me. But he's a sharp kid. I'm not sure how much longer the fantasy is going to last.

That incident got me thinking. I tried to remember exactly when I found out the rotund guy didn't miraculously deliver toys to every child on Earth. I couldn't. I do remember questioning why he gave more to some kids but not others, and why Santa's handwriting was exactly like my mother's. But there was never a moment of epiphany for me.

For you parents who have passed this milestone, did you break the news to your kids, or did you just let them figure it out on their own? Did they put you on the spot by outright asking you if Santa was real? What did you reply?

 

[teresafannin]

My parents let us figure it out for ourselves, then we played along for the benefit of younger siblings & cousins. Justin figured it out by the time he was 7 or 8, but he knew how much I loved Christmas, so he played along for my benefit, lol. Same thing for regular elves, the tooth fairy & monsters under the bed.

 

[Adoratrice]

This is something that used to bother me.....but having a 12 year old who believed until she was 9, I now say let them figure it out...my 10 year old son is much less mature than my daughter was at his age, I think he will figure it out next year . Now as far as my 6 year old daughter goes well.....I think we will have to break it to her when she has her own children, she believes so deeply in anything mystical but then again we have really put some effort into making these things seem real...we have caught the Easter bunny & Santa on film...the tooth fairie always leaves a trail of pink dust on the window sill and on their cheek where she kissed them as they slept. My oldest daughter thinks these things are wonderful and even wants to join in to keep the magic special for her siblings.

 

[Juliangel]

WS it can last a while, my boys, 8 and 11, are pretty sheltered and will tell you in a heart beat there is a santa.

Christmas of 1999 they decided they were goingto catch Santa with the video camera. They set the camera up back beside the tree and placed the remote under the cookie plate.

Their logic being when Santa touched the plate to get the cookies it would push on the buttons and start the camera.

What we did was my husband picked up the cookies one by one and moved out of camera range after each one and I recorded for a second each time.

We also got a red stocking from the dollar store with white furry trim, cut the bottom off and my husband slipped it on his arm and put on a white glove after setting out the toys.

Then I hit record and his hand came into view from the side of the camera and he shook his finger at them like Santa was telling them that it was bad to try and tape him.

Then you hear his heavy foot steps go out the door and onto the deck(no fireplace), with a jingle of bells shaking.

It was more for my younger son then the older but they both believe. I think I will let them learn on their old, keeping the magic alive as long as I can.

 

[R Nitelight]

It's hard to keep the secret in this age of mass media. I have a theory that most children learn the truth at an early age, but they also figure out that 'Santa' hands out more presents than Mommy and Daddy, so they play along and keep their little mouths shut.

 

[Nobody Special's wife]

I think imagination is good for children..I would go along as he believes and when he finds out there is not a Santa .....Point to he heart and tell him as long as he has faith he will always be there.....Its the heart of christmas...He should know that...


THE WIFE

 

[TN_Vixen]

Whisper

my son (7) asked me over and over this year about Santa being real. I was determined to have one last year with him believing... so I lied my ass off.. hehe. If he asks again next year, which I can be certain he will, I've decided to tell him the truth.

There's only so long you can keep them from this truth especially when at school they hear so much from the other kids, and TV shows slip, radio talks about "stocking stuffers" and on and on.

I'd rather him hear it from me, too.

 

[Cheyenne]

It's hard to keep the secret in this age of mass media. I have a theory that most children learn the truth at an early age, but they also figure out that 'Santa' hands out more presents than Mommy and Daddy, so they play along and keep their little mouths shut.

Yup, I agree with this one. Unless kids have become a whole lot MORE naive than when I was small. I can't imagine getting through kindergarten without knowing something is up. I was 4, almost 5, when I started kindergarten right after Christmas. I think I knew one of the first days of school that Santa was a fake- kids talk and it only takes one.

 

[Weird Harold]

Yes, Virginia, There is a Santa Claus.

When the question arose for my daughters, I found a copy of this famous article, and read it to them.

School age is when the question came up for both of them. (Kindergarten for one, First Grade for the other.)

I'm pretty sure that my six-year-old granddaughter is starting to get suspicious. If she's got it figured out, then she's playing along "for mommy's sake."

In my own cae, I had everything figured out around age 6 or 7, then at age 11, my certainty was severely shaken by the arrival of a three speed bicycle from "Santa." I knew positively that my parents couldn't afford one, and could think of no other explanation than Santa being real.

"Santa" that year was a friend of my father's, but I didn't find that out until the friend's death some 5 years later.

 

[Sammyjo]

My daughter figured it out about 2 years ago. She came up to me and said "Is Santa real?" and I asked her "Do you think Santa is real?" and she said "No" and I said "Santa is in all of us". She gave me a quizzical look. I explained to her how I felt when I go buy a gift for someone, never assuming I will get anything in return, just very happy that I had the means to give something to someone, and hopefully make them happy. Then explained to her that the idea behind Santa was anonymous giving. I know she was only 4, but the child soaked it all up.

The next year, she was in Kindergarten. All her friends were talking about "Santa". She came home and said "Mommy, the kids are talking about Santa at school." I explained to her that not everyone knows the secret, and that it is ok for her to believe in Santa if she wants to, but not to ruin the illusion for the other kids.

This year, she is in 1st grade. We did all these "Santa" activities...tracing his path on the internet, putting out reindeer food, etc. And in the morning, when she woke up, we talked about it again.

Kids want to believe in magical things. And maybe I ruined it for her 2 years ago by not "playing along"...I guess I don't know. She seems satisfied with the answers that I gave her...and there were a dozen or so other questions...I don't think she'll be tormented over it...there are plenty other things to believe in.

 

[CRaZy]

There is an erotic story on another site where the kids in the household wake up at midnight to find Mommy blowing "Santa Claus" and Santa saying, "I've got an extra special present for you little girl!" I....um.....guess that might be a good time to reveal all.

 

[Stormystarr]

I found out when I was 7 years old, it was x-mas eve and my great-uncle was at our house. He was drunk as usual, and I was very excited about 'Santa' coming that night. Well, he grabbed my arm and told me 'there is no santa clause little girl' he then pointed to my mother and said 'right there is your santa'. I remember just looking at my mother with tear filled eyes and asking if that was true. She said no, he was lying because he was drunk. But I knew then that he wasn't real. My great-uncle put it so hatefully into words.
I never really had a happy childhood, lots of fights and drinking, so that was one of the things that kept me going, fantasies. So I'd say just let them believe until they want to. Unless they're 12 or older, then I think it's time to tell them.

 

[naudiz]

When I realized there was no Santa, I didn't have the heart to tell my folks. They seemed so convinced he was real. Okay, so I was an odd kid.

 

[Thumper]

Huh?

You mean to tell me there is no Santa???

and here I thought my kids were just being mean when they kept telling me that!

Damn...just damn...

 

[Merelan]

No, No Thumper. You are our Santa. Remember? We have to sit on your lap and tell you what we want for a present....

 

[CreamyLady]

My daughter figured it out on her own, but since I still believe that there are creatures existing that we can't see, she humors me.

My own moment of truth came the year that my mother told me Santa didn't really want milk and cookies. What Santa wanted left out for him was a beer and a salami sandwich. My sister and I made the sandwich and Mom got the beer, and I tried to reconcile this break in the lore all night.

When we kissed my dad first thing the next morning, the salami breath was still there.

Sigh.

 

[Gaucho]

No Santa Claus?

"...You tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus? Thank God he lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood."

That's my answer and I'm sticking to it.

 

[Thumper]

*singing* "It's the little things that kill..."

Sit on my lap Merelan and pretty soon your present...er...presents itself?

OK that was lame...but I couldn't resist hehehhehe

 

[Dillinger]

My 9 year old stopped believing this year. Kind of sad... *sigh* But still she had a wonderful christmas. She held on longer than most of her classmates - last year she was made fun of because she still believed.

I'm very proud of her too because she has joined "the conspiracy" to insure that our youngest daughter continues to believe as long as possible and goes out of her way to make sure of it.

 

[Merelan]

I think I am the one that couldn't resist your gift to me.

 

[FlamingoBlue]

The same time you break the news....

about the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. NEVER!!! Some things are sacred, don't you know?


blue

 

[Digger Troll]

Digger Troll Says Hello!

 

[p_p_man]

For you parents who have passed this milestone, did you break the news to your kids, or did you just let them figure it out on their own? Did they put you on the spot by outright asking you if Santa was real? What did you reply?

It sort of played itself out as time went by. If they asked me whether Santa was real I'd say Yes and leave it at that. Which they accepted.

When they started pouring derision on me for believing in Santa I knew another one had passed that milestone...

Age didn't really come into it.