When did you realize you were turned on by BDSM?

[michael2956]

When did you realize you were turned on by BDSM? What was it that got you hooked?

 

[Greer]

When did you realize you were turned on by BDSM? What was it that got you hooked?

It's been a slow work in progress over the past few years. Literotica marks my first time dipping my toes into the bdsm pool online.

 

[Littlebitofme]

I knew something was different with me in high school. My husband (classmate then) and his friends had my best friend bent over a desk and were taking turns busting her butt with a text book for her birthday. I wished it was me. Repressed the feelings for a long time.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

When did I realize I was turned on BDSM? When I was about 35 or 36 years old and introduced to "BDSM" as a term.

When did I realize I was turned on by the whole whips and chains, bondage, SM, domination/submission, kinky, freaky shit thing?

About the first time I sat down watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show and realized how hawt I got watching Frank N. Furter beating the snail snot out of Riff-Raff, the humiliation that Brad and Janet were going through, etc. I was 17. I'm 51 now, you do the math.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Pretty much from the first, like-- I have a memory of a memory, of being two years old and fantasizing about what I now call "objectification."

And I never didn't have some little scenario going on in my head, not even in the most loving and bucolic of missionary lovemaking.

Geoff, Rocky Horror Picture Show was like comfort food the first time I saw it!

 

[Ropebunny]

I was 11. We were at a bookstore and mum was in the next aisle. I was in the comedy section. Being pretty curious I stealthily grabbed a sex themed book and proceded to flick through it in search of titilation. Discovered a passage about Marquis de Sade. It mentioned BDSM and also something about a female being tied to a cross and having her pubic hard burnt. Instantly got turned on, blushed and then put the book back. Read Garfield instead.

Two weeks later I worked up the courage to type BDSM into google. Safe search off. I think the rest is pretty obvious.

 

[Red Sonja]

As a kid, I always had fantasies about being tied up, beaten, etc. How old-- I guess 6, 7 thereabouts, but I certainly didn't know it was BDSM at that point and in that day. About the age of 12 I started babysitting consistently for a family in town. I was a voracious reader and my parents never censored what I read.

I found quite a few way more graphic than harlequin novels that featured some sections that weren't hearts and flowers but that were chains and whips. Geoff and Stella I so wish that I'd been in an enlightened part of the world, but growing up where I did... there was no MTV let alone Rocky Horror.

I suppose then that it was in my human sexuality class in college that I first learned the term BDSM. By then, I'd already discovered that I liked pleasure/pain, and I was gratified to finally figure out "what" I was... beyond a really fun date.

So... I think the answer for me about what got me hooked... is, me. I am what I am. I like what I like.

 

[Callmetim]

An excellent thread idea!

While a few experiences come to mind, I would have to say it all started with a girl I was dating just after college. We were at her place, since she lived alone, a warm summer evening with all the windows open on a well populated street. I asked her the mundane and cliche request of having her strip for me. She did so quite well, proceeded to loosen my pants and perform oral on me. I first felt a surge of control at that moment and, with little thought, grabbed my just removed belt, folded it in half and started to run it all over her back with some carefully placed swats which were mutually enjoyed.

I am still discovering how deep the rabbit hole goes in my writing and fantasies as the hunger to explore intensifies.

 

[Ahlam]

When did you realize you were turned on by BDSM? What was it that got you hooked?

I have always been like this, even though I didn't always know it was a thing. When I was a teenager, a friend described to me what all BDSM supposedly entailed (as if she were an authority on the subject). She wanted to shock me and I was shocked, but not for the reason she had hoped. Everything she described had played through my favorite fantasies! Was I really a weirdo? The true realization came when my wrists were pinned behind my back and a big bad wolf whispered "submissive" in my ear. I couldn't deny it.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I have always been like this, even though I didn't always know it was a thing. When I was a teenager, a friend described to me what all BDSM supposedly entailed (as if she were an authority on the subject). She wanted to shock me and I was shocked, but not for the reason she had hoped. Everything she described had played through my favorite fantasies! Was I really a weirdo? The true realization came when my wrists were pinned behind my back and a big bad wolf whispered "submissive" in my ear. I couldn't deny it.

Something about your account really speaks to me...

I became expert at keeping my face expressionless early on. any innocent word or action could trigger full fledged porn movies in my brain, at any time.

 

[KoPilot]

When I was in the 4-6 range I developed a fascination for size differences and all the pain, humiliation, and cute pet/owner/protector stuff it allowed for. I did the normal porn thing for a while because it all seemed transgressive, but after a while I developed a taste for non-con, dub-con, master/slave type relationships, and even snuff when I got into the world of written erotica. I discovered the term BDSM in high school but didn't really identify with it until college.

Now my tastes are more refined and I know exactly why I like the things I do instead of floundering around, oblivious to my own interests. GT is still my first love, though, and if it weren't for that I probably wouldn't be into more mainstream kink.

 

[Ahlam]

I became expert at keeping my face expressionless early on. any innocent word or action could trigger full fledged porn movies in my brain, at any time.

Yes! I take those mental tangents too. It's cool that you can control your facial expressions so well. I suck at it.

 

[michael2956]

Thanks for the great responses! Like some of you, I first recognized it at a very early age. I remember being turned on by seeing people tied up on old TV shows. I'm not sure how old I was, but when I started masturbating at an early age (probably 8 or 9) I used those visuals. One of my most vivid memories is from the old Vincent Price horror flick, "House of Wax." The heroine was naked (well, she was supposed to be. You could see most of her legs and bare shoulders and torso down to her cleavage). She was tied up with her hands above her head and was slowly being lowered toward a vat of hot wax. I think she was gagged, as well. I still remember the look of terror on her face (God, I'm getting so hard right now, just thinking about it).

When I was 15, my first girlfriend used to slap my face...hard! I can't remember why (maybe she was jealous?) but I do know the making out (no intercourse, but alot of fondling, finger fucking, handjobs) usually got very intense and frantic after these episodes.

 

[Callmetim]

any innocent word or action could trigger full fledged porn movies in my brain, at any time.

Yes! I take those mental tangents too.

The challenge I now face is trying to write down enough notes of the movie that plays in my head fast enough so that I can create a full-fledged story from it. I need instant replay for my mind.

 

[MellowTone]

Like many previous responders, I didn't so much realize BDSM turned me on, rather I realized my turn-ons are, for the most part, considered BDSM. My earliest fantasies, when I was maybe 9-11, all had to do with being tied up or chained, degraded, and used. It would be 20 years before I realized this was a thing.

 

[Stella_Omega]

The challenge I now face is trying to write down enough notes of the movie that plays in my head fast enough so that I can create a full-fledged story from it. I need instant replay for my mind.

A mental dictation device.

*nods*

 

[Callmetim]

A mental dictation device.

*nods*

I believe they have already been invented. They are called administrative assistants who type at 120 wpm.

Great ... now I have another movie playing in my mind.

 

[Kim_Burly]

When I was about 5-6 I realized that I always wanted to be the prisoner when boys were playing cowboys and indians and war and stuff like that Between 8th and 9th grades the feminism bug bit me and since my "feelings" conflicted with my new found ideals. This set off a struggle to suppress the "inapropriate" feelings for many years. I dabbled with being submissive in college, but that ended badly. I so badly wanted my husband to be in charge in the bedroom, but I told him the opposite . I wasn't really liberated until just recently. Sorry, I got sidetracked.

 

[NightSlut]

I figured out that I liked my breasts played with pretty hard while I masturbate when I was 7th grade or so? My imagination wandered away after that and goodness bless the internet...

 

[Loverskitten]

I think we may be trying to figure out a metric shit load of issues that may never be resolved. Good luck us.

 

[FurryFury]

I realized I was turned on by things that I now call BDSM, didn't have any terms for it then, by or before 5th grade. I just thought I was messed up. In my 40's I began to understand and accept myself and what I'm into.

 

[northwoods_sub]

I first realized I was into BDSM when I was in my late 20s, before that I didn't have a term for it I just knew being tied down, spanked and forced really got my juices going.

I first realized I enjoyed being submissive was as a 4 or 5 year old when we would play war I always wanted to be the abused, tied up captive.

 

[Sir_Winston54]

According to Wikipedia, the term "BDSM" was coined some time in the 1990s, so yeah, that would have been when I realized I was turned on by BDSM... but not when I realized I was turned on by some of the activities included in that (now-)umbrella term.

My sexuality has *always* been tied to spanking or otherwise giving pain to members of the opposite sex, almost entirely focused on the rump, backs of the thighs, breasts, abdomen, pudenda, along with certain (ostensibly) forced actions, e.g., face-fucking, anal sex (rough or otherwise), doggy-style sex (especially with her leaning against the back of a parked car in a semi-public place), etc. Always. As far back as I can remember. I've told the story here (in Lit) of one of my earliest memories involving spanking a neighbor girl, and at times mentioned that almost every boy-girl relationship that lasted for "more than a moment" involved at least some spanking, pinching or other provision of pain.

So... when did I *realize* that that was a necessary part of my sexuality? I don't know that there ever was a moment of realization; just an enduring knowledge, possibly from the first point of acknowledgment that I was a sexual being, that it needed to be a part of my relationship(s).

 

[Sir_Winston54]

I first realized I was into BDSM when I was in my late 20s, before that I didn't have a term for it I just knew being tied down, spanked and forced really got my juices going.

I first realized I enjoyed being submissive was as a 4 or 5 year old when we would play war I always wanted to be the abused, tied up captive.

Hi, NWS, long freakin' time no see! Good to see you wander back in; we've missed you in the football pools the last few years!

BTW, clicked on the mydungeonspace link in your sig and got sent to a generic "join us and you can see stuff" page... ?

 

[kiwi_submissive]

Probably when I was about 20 or so. I have always found sex boring and after a time repetitive. I met a guy who was very rough and it really surprised me how into it I was. I had heard of BDSM previously but had never really thought about it for me so I did some reasearch and some experimenting to see whether I was really into that....turns out, I was.