What Would You Do?

[Rubyfruit]

... but I have very high suspiciouns about someone.

Hi Kitty. I just wanted to point out that suspicions are not fact. If it's not fact, it's gossip. If it's gossip, don't pass it on.

 

[JaymesBlond007]

Why you blowin' my cover, girl?

 

[Nora]

Hi Kitty. I just wanted to point out that suspicions are not fact. If it's not fact, it's gossip. If it's gossip, don't pass it on.

Shush you!! Trying to keep me away from da gossip! EVIL, EVIL WENCH!!

Originally posted by His_kitty

Well when I was involved in this situation I had considered doing that. But I don't really know very many people here, and figured that they wouldn't give me the time of day. Also I took into consideration that I was just wrong, what if these horrible suspiciouns I had were in error? I'd very possibly lose a good friend because I was being silly.

I think that most of the women here are sincerely good people and wouldn't begrudge you asking them whether your suspicions are correct or not or what their experiences with Mr Z are as you're thinking of starting a relationship with him. It's not passing gossip to ASK if they know if so-and-so is a scum-sucking toad. It's gossip to say without any verifiable backup that he's a scum-sucking toad.

It's also not wrong to tell someone else what your experiences with a certain poster were, if they're asking for good reasons. I had a girl PM me once because she had doubts about meeting a particular poster here. I told her that I thought he was a scumbag and why I thought so. I didn't require her to make the choice to stay away from him, but did suggest that she use some basic precautions if she did intend to meet him.

I've outright asked a guy who was flirting with me if he was with Poster X cuz I didn't want her to have any ill-will towards me. Of course, I also double-verified that with Poster X cuz I don't trust most men as far as I could throw them.

 

[Guest]

Hmm..

being on the receiving end of this situation a few times....I have learned that its better to keep your mouth shut. People tend to screw themselves over all by themselves... so sit back at wait.

 

[His_kitty]

Hi Kitty. I just wanted to point out that suspicions are not fact. If it's not fact, it's gossip. If it's gossip, don't pass it on.

Which is exactly why I would never name the said person.


I'll say this, if someone pm'd me with a question about them I'd be a lil weary of it. If we conversed back and forth and I determined that they really cared for the individual but yet had doubts about them.. I'd only share what I knew.

And I suppose I should say that I think I'm probably downplaying it a tad. I do know certain things.



Rambrat and honey - I don't know these women personally, only occasionally posting back and forth. So I don't really consider them friends per say.


James sugar, you're an angel and incapable of being a jerk like this.

 

[Cheyenne]

Or do you tell everything you know and warn others that could possibly get hurt?

This is for real life as well as online.

His name was Magic Merlin. I told the world. January, 2001 for those of you who like to search threads.

I'd do it again in a heartbeat, but I think it would be much tougher now that Lit is so much bigger.

 

[His_kitty]

Re: Re: What Would You Do?

His name was Magic Merlin. I told the world. January, 2001 for those of you who like to search threads.

I'd do it again in a heartbeat, but I think it would be much tougher now that Lit is so much bigger.

You've got balls Cheyenne, thats just one of the things I admire about you.

I however, am a wimp. lol

 

[HeavyStick]

I'm sure you'll get through it Hk, you're a tough chica.

 

[april-wine]

If I knew, and it was someone I cared about...I'd spill the beans in a heartbeat....I would hope someone would warn me as well....

 

[His_kitty]

I'm sure you'll get through it Hk, you're a tough chica.

Thank you sweets.



But if it honestly hurt me I would never have mentioned it here... eek

I was/am actually thinking about what if someone actually fell for this dude and how they might feel.

 

[bknight2602]

I try to stay out of other peoples business, unless it directly effects a close personal friend. Then I might be tempmted to say something.

 

[Freya]

I've been in the situation of being lied to online, and finding out later that quite a few people knew way before I did. They told me later that they did not want to get involved, and did nto want the "shoot the messenger" syndrome happening. A few months down the roadf, I found about another person who was getting involved with this character - and although I didn't know her well, I felt she should be aware of what was going on. I don't think I did it in the best manner possible, but she is a very nice person, and I really didn't want to see her getting hurt. She chose to continue on with this person, against my warnings - that I have a feeling were taken as a bit of sour grapes - but I no longer see them together, so of course I get curious as to whether she did finally figure him out. But I felt much better after telling her what I knew and what my opinions were - I think I'd have been feeling pretty guilty had I just sat by and said nothing.