What is Vanilla?

[Cyndeveaux]

We are having a difference of opinion. My b/f thinks vanilla sex is defined as boring or unadventurous. I think it means, sex without activities such as BDSM, D/s or swinging as some examples.

So I am coming here to find out what other people think vanilla sex is or means for the most part. Thoughts anyone?

 

[SamScribble]

Maybe it's a generational thing, but I tend to agree with you, Cyndeveaux. Vanilla is neither boring nor unadventurous, but it probably doesn't involve BDSM as a priority.

 

[Porkwarrior]

I am an adventerous man whore...but I describe my tastes as "vanilla".

I like a blowjob...but I don't need to be tied up wearing a gimp mask with five fingers up my arse to enjoy it.

I like a wet pussy wrapped around my cock, clenching, milking...but I don't need to tie her up, put her in a cage, or spend the three hours beforehand in some involved scenario to get me hard for her pussy.


I like...fucking. In all it's shapes & forms. Without toys, or gimmicks, or safe words and costumes.

Just plain, straight up, naked booty without a twist.



No, your b/f has "vanilla" all wrong.

 

[CBM514]

What "Vanilla" sex is to people is VERY perspective based and influenced by their current. And past practices and experiences...typically the term is used to refer to just regular intercourse(with or without foreplay)...but having said that, in sure there are some that would say any oral is outside of "vanilla" also...so it really is up to you to define it I think, but I don't think it's anything that isn't hardcore of some kind

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

VANILLA SEX is 'making love' in the traditional sense of the word. Between two people
who have a relationship.

I don't exclude toys or BDSM. I exclude extra players.

 

[CBM514]

VANILLA SEX is 'making love' in the traditional sense of the word. Between two people
who have a relationship.

I don't exclude toys or BDSM. I exclude extra players.

And here goes the endless debate...I would say that they don't need to have a relationship to have vanilla sex and there was a time in my life when I was with someone and her finishing me with her mouth after sex and dirty talk during was "non-vanilla"

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

And here goes the endless debate...I would say that they don't need to have a relationship to have vanilla sex and there was a time in my life when I was with someone and her finishing me with her mouth after sex and dirty talk during was "non-vanilla"

Sure. I read a few definitions of vanilla sex, and there are plenty of opinions. But I sometimes spank my lovers, sometimes we do it publicly, etc. but it never includes other participants. That's where I draw the line.

 

[CBM514]

Sure. I read a few definitions of vanilla sex, and there are plenty of opinions. But I sometimes spank my lovers, sometimes we do it publicly, etc. but it never includes other participants. That's where I draw the line.

I would agree that as a general rule that any third party is not vanilla...some would argue that even light spanking during isn't ether though

 

[Bramblethorn]

We are having a difference of opinion. My b/f thinks vanilla sex is defined as boring or unadventurous. I think it means, sex without activities such as BDSM, D/s or swinging as some examples.

So I am coming here to find out what other people think vanilla sex is or means for the most part. Thoughts anyone?

Yeah, I interpret it as meaning non-kinky sex, but it's often used with derogatory overtones by BDSM snobs.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I would agree that as a general rule that any third party is not vanilla...some would argue that even light spanking during isn't ether though

We live at a time when there are no standards, so why are we having this discussion if there is no answer?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LOILZ_D3aRg

Tell him, Fred.

 

[NippleMuncher]

As someone said earlier, "vanilla" is more a POV definition, however, it typically would be sticking to the socially accepted "norms" of sex, no toys, no experimentation, no extra partners, no exotic locales, that sort of thing. It isn't necessarily boring, unless you always do the same exact thing, each and every time. Even with vanilla sex, you can switch up your game and rhythm to keep things interesting.

 

[dianebutterfly]

I think that it's just like vanilla ice cream--it might not be the wildest flavor out there, but is there anything wrong with it? No way!

 

[BrightlyGo]

Vanilla sex is still sex. Sex is never boring. Maybe the stuff around it gets boring - if there's no foreplay or no romance, for instance, or no variation. Maybe the relationship gets boring.

I'd tend to define vanilla as just the stuff that's 'normal,' that any Ozzie & Harriet type in your community would do. Obviously, that'll vary, a lot. In the BDSM community, vanilla is just 'not BDSM.'





Actual vanilla (not the artificial stuff), BTW, is made from a tropical orchid. It has to be pollinated and harvested by hand and put through a six-step process taking months to get that wonderful aroma. How plain & boring is that?

People think of vanilla ice-cream as plain, but ice-cream without flavoring (just sugar) is called 'sweet cream,' and is actually pretty nice, especially if you're mixing it with fruit. Apropos of nothing.

 

[Asshungry]

Sex is always good unless its the sex that you arent getting. Sometimes we get in a rut of doing it the same old way and it can seem Vanilla. Always good to switch it up and add some variety. Doesnt mean you need to go full blown kinky.

 

[Jessicasc1970]

Vanilla sex is everyday sex. No toys, bondage, other people, or anything kinky. That doesn't make it bad. Just like vanilla ice cream, vanilla sex can be fantastic.

Also, vanilla ice cream can have things mixed in to change it up a bit, and serves as a base for other flavors. Vanilla sex is also a starting point for lots of kinky fun.

 

[lauren26f]

We are having a difference of opinion. My b/f thinks vanilla sex is defined as boring or unadventurous. I think it means, sex without activities such as BDSM, D/s or swinging as some examples.

So I am coming here to find out what other people think vanilla sex is or means for the most part. Thoughts anyone?

Penetration and oral is vanilla for most. Anything else, beginning with anal, would be kinky. Bondage and S&M is about as kinky as it gets. Now for some that have sex a few times a year, anything other than the missionary position might be kinky to them. LOL

 

[TerrysSexyWife]

I consider vanilla as the base for all great sex.. I just like mine with some sprinkles, extra toppings, kind of like a blizzard from DQ. The vanilla is amazing but add some extra goodies and it is delicious and different all the time. 18 years with my husband and I still surprise and delight him. Sex is hotter now than in the beginning.