What are some of your experiences with Homophobia from women?

[brownhairedboy2]

I am especially interested in what if any experiences with homophobia you have had by women (whether you are a gay man or woman). Maybe its just me but as I guy although I myself am not gay I am still familiar with the types of things men do and say to each other. However, I never hear about nor read or see on TV much about homophobic women or the types of harassment they inflict upon gay men and women so I am curious what type of grief they give lesbians or gay guys.

 

[glamorilla]

usually girls just try to get into my pants.

 

[SweetCherry]

There's this girl that I know in my town. I've not come out to her or even mentioned the possibility to her that I like girls. I never will either. She's made comments befor how homosexuality and bisexuality are just plain ick. She's a gossip and a back stabbing wench tho, so I pretty much ignore what she says.

 

[brownhairedboy2]

She's made comments befor how homosexuality and bisexuality are just plain ick.

What did you say when she said that?

 

[SweetCherry]

What did you say when she said that?

I said that each person should be able to live how they wish, so long as they're not hurting anyone else. Beyond that, I'm pretty much trying to hold my tongue, because of the type of person she is. I'm kinda stuck in the place I'm livign so I'd rather not make my life a living hell because of her. In a town of less than 600 people, I'd prefer to remain as invisible as possible. Having her try to smear my name all over the place with the bullshit gossip she'd start isn't my idea of a good time.

 

[april-wine]

I said that each person should be able to live how they wish, so long as they're not hurting anyone else. Beyond that, I'm pretty much trying to hold my tongue, because of the type of person she is. I'm kinda stuck in the place I'm livign so I'd rather not make my life a living hell because of her. In a town of less than 600 people, I'd prefer to remain as invisible as possible. Having her try to smear my name all over the place with the bullshit gossip she'd start isn't my idea of a good time.

Wanna have a GOOD time, baby?

 

[deliciously_naughty]

I went to all girls college and there were some girls who were absolutely vicious to the out girls.

Things like harrassment by writing "die dykes" on their dry erase board, creating noise while the lgbt group was trying to have a meeting. Luckily my school had some harsh anti-hate regs so when the girls were found, they were punished harshly.

There are also the girls who go around saying "I think it's so disgusting when two girls kiss or two guys kiss", which is hurtful.

In K-12, it can also be calling a girl a lesbian to hurt her feelings

Women can be just as cruel as guys.

 

[brownhairedboy2]

Women can be just as cruel as guys.

Oh I don't know about that.
I know some can be viscious but for example I have never heard of a straight woman gay-bashing a lesbian before.

 

[brownhairedboy2]

Things like harrassment by writing "die dykes" on their dry erase board, creating noise while the lgbt group was trying to have a meeting.

What does the lgbt group stand for?
I bet you had a lot of fun at the all-girls college!

 

[deliciously_naughty]

What does the lgbt group stand for?
I bet you had a lot of fun at the all-girls college!

lesbian, gay, bi, transgender group on campus


And hell yeah the straight chicks can be evil...

 

[brownhairedboy2]

And hell yeah the straight chicks can be evil...

Hmm.. Well for whatever reason I never heard or hear about straight women harassing lesbians, just guys making fun of or beating up gay guys.

 

[Pookie]

Oh I don't know about that.
I know some can be viscious but for example I have never heard of a straight woman gay-bashing a lesbian before.

What the public normally sees is violent or dramatic acts that get publicize by the media. Generally, these incidents tend to involve guys, but not always.

The "typical" everyday harrassment is difficult for a camera to capture. Trust me, it's there with chicks and can be very vicious toward gays, lesbians, and bisexuals.

 

[MaddyBaby]

You know, I don't know if I am going to make sense...

But I think women can be more subtle, cunning, and more hurtful about it than men can.

Men are usually just, "Stupid faggots" or "fucking queers, I'm gonna kick their ass!"... While women are more... cutting to the quick. Well, the situations I've been in... and seen.

I think women can be more hurtful in general.


(Remember, this statement comes from a hurt, brokenhearted lesbian who is a little bitter still.) LOL

 

[deliciously_naughty]

I think you have to take into consideration the means by which each sex uses to attack those they mean to hurt.

Males: usually use physical violence or respond to taunting with physical violence. Much more media friendly, and a better headline. Male bullies (whatever form the bullying take) tend to be more visible, because most acts are overt (ie, hitting, saying things loudly, etc) People usually feel a need to respond to this sort of bullying

Females: traditionally use verbal abuse, gossip, and ostracizing as their means of attack. Not very media friendly. This isn't just against lesbians, but those girls who don't fit in because they're too smart/not smart enough, too pretty/not pretty enough, not thin enough, don't dress/act/whatever the way they "should." This is actually the subject of a lot of current research. Females tend to be covert, using gossip networks, notes, and other less obvious forms of torment. Adults tend not to go after this sort of bullying, preferring to dismiss it as "girls being catty" when in truth it is a very damaging experience.

I think the other women here would back me up on this.

 

[Netzach]

Women are more likely to covertly try and get children taken away from gay parents or undermine someone's achievements or spread the word behind someone's back.

Admittedly, it's not a tire iron to the head, but the effects can be incredibly brutal and damaging.

I am very closeted at work because I work in the fashion industry where all the men are gay and all the women are straight and available and cute and pert and femme. Puke.

 

[Sillyman]

Rarely do I see as overt hatred for gays in women than I do with men. Of course, stupid people are verywhere, so I don't deny that women can and will be hateful and cruel towards gays. The typical attitude is one of discuss, but most of the women I have met and enjoyed company with have tended to have either thought about or even actively tried lesbianism at one point.

 

[Pookie]

I think you have to take into consideration the means by which each sex uses to attack those they mean to hurt.

Males: usually use physical violence or respond to taunting with physical violence. Much more media friendly, and a better headline. Male bullies (whatever form the bullying take) tend to be more visible, because most acts are overt (ie, hitting, saying things loudly, etc) People usually feel a need to respond to this sort of bullying

Females: traditionally use verbal abuse, gossip, and ostracizing as their means of attack. Not very media friendly. This isn't just against lesbians, but those girls who don't fit in because they're too smart/not smart enough, too pretty/not pretty enough, not thin enough, don't dress/act/whatever the way they "should." This is actually the subject of a lot of current research. Females tend to be covert, using gossip networks, notes, and other less obvious forms of torment. Adults tend not to go after this sort of bullying, preferring to dismiss it as "girls being catty" when in truth it is a very damaging experience.

I think the other women here would back me up on this.

I basically agree with you. Chicks tend to be more covert in their approaches. It's hard to fight back against something you can't easily see until after the damage is done. And even then, you may not be able to fight back. The "wounds" left tend to be much more difficult to get over, if you ever do.

 

[brownhairedboy2]

And hell yeah the straight chicks can be evil...

Straight chicks can be mean?!
Nooo, the hell you say!