I would like to here some sub/slaves point of view. I have forbidden my slave to use her vibrator on her self when she is not in my presence. She is a wonderful woman with a very high sex drive and tremendous passion. I could not ask for a better serving sex slave. I learned of her little toy and immediately put a stop to it. She admitted that since she began using it (in secret) that is has become harder for her to climax without it. I ordered her to stop using it unless she has my permission or unless I use it on her. With some shame she agreed to stop. My question is I want to allow her some pleasure on her own and at the same time I don’t want to compete for her senses with a machine (the machine will win) when it is clearly coming between us. Do I just keep my foot down and tell her to use her fingers ? or do I come up with some sort of compromise and allow her some time with the shaky gizmo ? My Dom head tells me to stay firm, but my heart and love for seeing her satisfied is telling me to compromise.
Vibe ? or xnay the Buzzing burden ?
- Thread starter Lava Rock
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Well, you're not telling her she can't use it AT ALL, ever. Maybe "allow" her to use it, alone, say once a month if she's behaved well. I see no harm in limiting her use of it, especially since it's ultimately interfering with her pleasure. If she gets more out of your time together by not using her vibrator, then you both benefit. I stay stand firm.
Vibes can be quite desensitizing. I know if I've used one in the last 2 or 3 days before I'm with a partner, I can feel practically nothing. Not worth it to me.
Vibes can be quite desensitizing. I know if I've used one in the last 2 or 3 days before I'm with a partner, I can feel practically nothing. Not worth it to me.
bunny bondage
just cruisin' through
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good call
there are plenty of other ways to pleasure yourself without the use of a vibrator. i personally find a little "rubbin the nub" more satisfying that a toy. however, it can be VERY hard to refrain from masturbating when i'm alone and thinking of Him. so i guess my advice would be to ban the vibe but allow her to pleasure herself.
there are plenty of other ways to pleasure yourself without the use of a vibrator. i personally find a little "rubbin the nub" more satisfying that a toy. however, it can be VERY hard to refrain from masturbating when i'm alone and thinking of Him. so i guess my advice would be to ban the vibe but allow her to pleasure herself.
IMHO...I would stick with my gut...allow play but not with vibe. I have found that I too would rather not use machinery....I seem to get a longer lasting, deeper orgasm using good 'ole manipulation...wonderful gut wrenching spasms for several minutes when I've done it just right...I want to stay as sensitive as I possibly can for my partner....
NemoAlia
Voracious
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In my experience, prolonging the vibe anticipation (like, say, leaving it at home when I go off to visit family for a month) leaves me very excited at the prospect of spending some quality time with the toy: If I've been without it for a while, the vibrator can bring me off eight or ten times in the first 15 minutes. Although they may not be the world's most earth-shattering orgasms, the novelty of having so many so quickly seems worth the wait and the subsequent (temporary) desensitization.
To buzz or not to buzz
I'm not sure how helpful this will be but when my dom asked me about my toys I was restricted from using them on my genitals at all - but was free to use them else where to stimulate erogenous zones. In fact, he turned it into an assignment. While stimulating myself I should see what areas responded well to the vibe...back of the knees, small of the back, elbow...etc. then I reported to him the next time we talked. Usually I was rewarded for my "research and hard work" so there was the double pleasure of the reward AND having pleased my dom.
Another assignment might be to make her Skinner herself (B.F. that is) I read an article that detailed using your females vibrator 'against' her. If she has qualms about anal, have her stimulate herself to orgasm and then use the vibrator around the opening to her ass....progressively going further...etc etc. The idea was, not only are you adding the excitement of it being an 'order' but the nervousness is probably reduced because she's in the private of her home and can relax. This can work in all kinds of ways. If you are trying to make her clit respond to nipple stimulation...the vibrator can come in handy. This would work best in a d/s relationship, I think, because the sub will follow the masters instructions (were in a nilla relationship you'd have to do some pretty hard bargaining to convince a person to restrict themselves, even if ultimately it would benefit them)
So..that's just a suggestion
~
B
I'm not sure how helpful this will be but when my dom asked me about my toys I was restricted from using them on my genitals at all - but was free to use them else where to stimulate erogenous zones. In fact, he turned it into an assignment. While stimulating myself I should see what areas responded well to the vibe...back of the knees, small of the back, elbow...etc. then I reported to him the next time we talked. Usually I was rewarded for my "research and hard work" so there was the double pleasure of the reward AND having pleased my dom.
Another assignment might be to make her Skinner herself (B.F. that is) I read an article that detailed using your females vibrator 'against' her. If she has qualms about anal, have her stimulate herself to orgasm and then use the vibrator around the opening to her ass....progressively going further...etc etc. The idea was, not only are you adding the excitement of it being an 'order' but the nervousness is probably reduced because she's in the private of her home and can relax. This can work in all kinds of ways. If you are trying to make her clit respond to nipple stimulation...the vibrator can come in handy. This would work best in a d/s relationship, I think, because the sub will follow the masters instructions (were in a nilla relationship you'd have to do some pretty hard bargaining to convince a person to restrict themselves, even if ultimately it would benefit them)
So..that's just a suggestion
~
B
Lancecastor
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I suggest showing your leadership in another way...I create structured masturbation assignments for use in training.
That way, the device(s) becomes irrelevant, as her solo session is instigated and carried out via your remote control.
One session might involve her giving herself edge play with her ankles tied, stopping to repeat a mantra of your writing x times when her pussy begins to twitch, then x-1 times, x-2 times, until at the last point, she has permission to cum...and she will.
Another might place her in a movie theatre, near the front, by herself, with a vibrator, a long coat, boots and nothing else.
Or having her wear a wrap skirt and masturbate under the table at a Greek restaurant each time saganaki is served.....Opahhhhhh!
You know what to do.
Be the D.
Cheers
Lance
That way, the device(s) becomes irrelevant, as her solo session is instigated and carried out via your remote control.
One session might involve her giving herself edge play with her ankles tied, stopping to repeat a mantra of your writing x times when her pussy begins to twitch, then x-1 times, x-2 times, until at the last point, she has permission to cum...and she will.
Another might place her in a movie theatre, near the front, by herself, with a vibrator, a long coat, boots and nothing else.
Or having her wear a wrap skirt and masturbate under the table at a Greek restaurant each time saganaki is served.....Opahhhhhh!
You know what to do.
Be the D.
Cheers
Lance
thejamesuk
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This is My first posting of anything here, I am new to Lit.com and am thouroughly enjoying the conversations and the literature, well done all the talented writers!!
As for the buz issue... for Me, the simple fact is the original problem was the subs secrecy! If that were Mine, not only would she be explicitly banned for a significant period of My choosing, and I agree compromise is not an option her, but she would be explicitly punished.
I love the joy of My sub pleasuring herself, with Me present or not, but secrecy is not an acceptable part of the relationship, to refer to another thread (how to spot non-Dom/mes) this is not a submissive act. D/s is surely a very open and honest relationship, or it is manipulation by One or the other!"
James
An English Gentleman
As for the buz issue... for Me, the simple fact is the original problem was the subs secrecy! If that were Mine, not only would she be explicitly banned for a significant period of My choosing, and I agree compromise is not an option her, but she would be explicitly punished.
I love the joy of My sub pleasuring herself, with Me present or not, but secrecy is not an acceptable part of the relationship, to refer to another thread (how to spot non-Dom/mes) this is not a submissive act. D/s is surely a very open and honest relationship, or it is manipulation by One or the other!"
James
An English Gentleman
G
Guest
Guest
Lava Rock said:
I would say stay firm, especially if she is becoming dependant on the toy for orgasms. That is not a good thing!
I know from experience. I am used to an "everyday device" I converted into a toy (vibrates faster than any sex toy out there). Long story short, I don't own the toy anymore. And, though I have "tried" to masturbate without it I cannot cum. I have gotten too used to my toy.Since You mentioned how You have used the toy on her before, I'd say there is nothing wrong with telling her to use her fingers (or, I guess, anything that does not vibrate) when she is alone and the toy can be a special treat she can look forward to when Y/you are together.
