Vanilla ??

[Sex & Diamonds]

When people use this term describing lifestyle what comes to mind? Is this term only used by those in the BDSM realm to describe those that aren't? What does it mean to you?


Just curious.

 

[His_kitty]

Someone who is only "into" traditional sex, who isn't explorative, "into" any sort of kink or fetish.

 

[Nora]

I like Amy's White Chocolate with bananas crushed in better, although Mexican Vanilla is really good with gingersnaps in it.

 

[Sex & Diamonds]

Someone who is only "into" traditional sex, who isn't explorative, "into" any sort of kink or fetish.

Is it a term only used by those with "kink's or fetishes"?

 

[His_kitty]

Is it a term only used by those with "kink's or fetishes"?

I've only seen/heard it used by those who are into them, never by anyone who isn't.

Actually I've mentioned the term "Vanilla" to several people to discover they didn't have a clue what it meant... they turned out to be more traditional. Whatever that's worth.

 

[Nora]

Of course, Blue Bell's Homemade Vanilla rocks too, although not as much as their Chocolate Decadence.

 

[Sex & Diamonds]

Nora....


Danigt. You are making me hungry.


Good thing I always keep chocolate in the house, although I don't have much in the way of vanilla.

 

[Sex & Diamonds]

I've only seen/heard it used by those who are into them, never by anyone who isn't.

Actually I've mentioned the term "Vanilla" to several people to discover they didn't have a clue what it meant... they turned out to be more traditional. Whatever that's worth.

Thanks !


Seems to me that it is a term used by those that have some sort of kink or fetish. Those that don't just haven't heard the term or know what it means. Why would they?

 

[His_kitty]

Thanks !


Seems to me that it is a term used by those that have some sort of kink or fetish. Those that don't just haven't heard the term or know what it means. Why would they?

They have no reason to, until some freak comes along and asks them if they are more vanilla than not..

Oh, not that I would ever do such a thing.. just saying is all. ;-)

 

[Sex & Diamonds]

They have no reason to, until some freak comes along and asks them if they are more vanilla than not..

Oh, not that I would ever do such a thing.. just saying is all. ;-)

LOL

Oh no, I can't imagine anyone doing such a thing...

 

[Cheyenne]

Do a search on the term and you will find we have had huge battles on the general board about it in years past.

Writerdom, cymbidia, Killermuffin, etc. were all major contributors to the discussion at the time. Some feel the term is useful (those in the bdsm community, not just those into "kink.") Others feel the term is offensive since those NOT into bdsm aren't necessarily "unadventurous."

 

[peachykeen]

Others feel the term is offensive since those NOT into bdsm aren't necessarily "unadventurous."

Exactly. I've never seen it used in any kind of constructive way; it seems to be a term that a lot of 'kink' people toss snootily at the non-BDSM people with the specific intention of making at seem as though the non-BDSM's are just soooooo boooring, daaahling.

 

[Mischka]

vanilla: adj. Lacking adornments or special features; basic or ordinary.

 

[Secret Kate]

I like Amy's White Chocolate with bananas crushed in better, although Mexican Vanilla is really good with gingersnaps in it.

Thanks for the link Nora - when I'm in Austin next weekend I'll try to get there!

 

[Mischka]

Kate, I'm afraid Nora is wrong. Sweet cream with strawberry crushin's is the way to go. Trust me.

 

[Secret Kate]

9:30 AM and I'm wanting Ice Cream now!!!!!


There's an Amy's in Houston - but not quite close enough to make it on my lunch break!

I'll check out the one in Austin next weekend.

When I take my girls (8 teenage Girl Scouts) to San Antonio this summer we'll check out the one there!

Woohoo an Ice Cream plan!

 

[Secret Kate]

Kate, I'm afraid Nora is wrong. Sweet cream with strawberry crushin's is the way to go. Trust me.

Sounds good, but I don't eat strawberries! I'll have to stick with her suggestion on the bananas!

 

[Cleopatra]

They have no reason to, until some freak comes along and asks them if they are more vanilla than not..

First off, hi Sex!! Nice to see you here babe!!
And this is the way I found out what it meant, so I take it to mean someone who is either naive in the ways of kink, or one who chooses to be that way.

 

[white_mage_goddess]

I have heard lots of people use "vanilla" with a negative connotation, but overall it doesnt have to be an insult. I personally enjoy both vanilla and non-vanilla sex. I enjoy a good mixture of both. This is why I'm not into a 24/7 bdsm lifetstyle. To me having the same kinky sex every night is just as boring as the same vanilla sex every night.

I also don't use the term "vanilla" to refer exclusively to non-bdsm'ers. I use to to refer to unkinky people period. There are lots of non-bdsm related kinks. If you don't enjoy ANY of those kinks, I would call you vanilla.

I don't think its a bad thing; its just that I can't imagine enjoying sex every night without any kinks at all. I don't look down on straight vanilla people; I do however look at them with a sort of bemused curiousity because I just honestly don't understand the mindset. I was with a vanilla partner for 2 years and I was drove absolutely crazy by how boring he was in bed. I couldn't handle that for the rest of my life. I need variety!

 

[Cheyenne]

...I don't look down on straight vanilla people; I do however look at them with a sort of bemused curiousity because I just honestly don't understand the mindset. I was with a vanilla partner for 2 years and I was drove absolutely crazy by how boring he was in bed. I couldn't handle that for the rest of my life. I need variety!

Uh huh. Calling your "vanilla" partner "boring" isn't looking down on him at all.

 

[*Catbabe*]

Runinnnnnnnnnnnng in to chomppppppppppppp S&D cause I havent seen her a bazillion years...well maybe not that long.... Hugggggggggggggggs Chicky!!!

I agree with the general consensus...vanilla is generally used in a negative way.......

We need to change the defintion of vanilla sex to..........sex that is proceeded by somebody smearing vanilla ice cream all over their body and somebody else licking it off!!

hmmmmmmm, I had too much caffeine again today

 

[modest mouse]

For the record, I like Cheyenne.

and... People who use vanilla are short sighted and stupid.

 

[Guest]

The word "bland" comes to mind.

 

[Pixie Mischief]

well to my bf if you say vanilla hed say YUMMY its his favorite taste/scent hehe

But anyway to me it means routine.. traditional.. you know the tipical stuff missionary. YUCK!

I like different stuff trying new things hehe.

 

[MissTaken]

For the record, I like Cheyenne.

and... People who use vanilla are short sighted and stupid.

For the record,

I like Cheyenne.

I like modest mouse.

But, I will go sit in the corner with short sighted and stupid people


Granted, my use of the word is definitely not ever intended to be derrogatory or disrespectful and is only used on the "other" forum to quickly describe some differences in my life in the last couple of years.